Please, Read: Important

Do you remember that friend of mine a few weeks back who came from an abused household?

Seems like we've patched things up.

While I have no update on the extent of her current domestic situation, I believe it is safe to say that she no longer hates me. She is even in a better situation, I suppose. In fact, just this past Sunday, she went on a friendly date (yeah, sure) with one of my other friends. Of course I teased her for it—that's what friends do. But I did feel happy for her, and she seemed quite content as well. She didn't even really get mad that I was jesting; she was embarrassed, but not enraged.

I'd like to read the texts to you, if you don't mind, as I feel that they are a great beacon of hope for me. Names have been blotted. If you're reading this, then I'd like you to know that there really is a time when the darkness leaves, and the sun does rise again.

Me: Seriously, though, despite the teasing and jests, I really am quite happy to see this. It's... intriguing, intoxicating, invigorating, to see you coming out of your shell somewhat. So despite what ---- and I say, it really is and was a pleasure.

C: Wow. But I have never done this before. I'm quite scared to be honest. We're not officially bf gf. But to have this happen is scary, yet adventurous. I don't think ==== and I are ready for a relationship, we're both still in HS and need to concentrate on school.

Me: That's fine and admirable. The point you should keep in mind is whether or not that was enjoyable. The magic word is No, and knowing ==== he wouldn't force you on a second endeavor. Regardless, hopefully you had some fun. Hopefully you'll understand that, as your friends, we have to embarrass you. Kinda a key component of friendship. But hey, it's not like I'm an expert or anything, even though I'm a fan of a show whose mantra is Friendship is Magic...

C: Thank you. I believe that if ==== and I became gf bf, if we break up, then there will be tension between all of us. Which I wish not upon us, I consider you all as my family. I learned so much from you all, and I truly enjoy the friendship between all of us. I don't want to risk a break up which may ruin this friendship. Besides, I find sex and kissing to be repulsive. I wish to remain unmarried in life. Jared, know that I'm not mad at you. Nor do I hate you. I understand why you did what you did. I'm sorry for everything I've done in the past to you guys. You guys are my family. I love you all.

Me: Water under the bridge. I hold nothing against you.

C: Thank you Jared.

I believe that this goes to show the extent intervention has on an individual whom the intervention is for. Had I not spoken up, she might not have gotten the help she needed. She might not have even come out enough to go on a date. But seeing this, today, made me feel warm inside. I felt that I had made a huge difference, a positive change, in my friend's life—and I can honestly say that nothing feels as great as that.

The grudges she held against me are gone. She truly considers us her friends, her family. I think that is a humbling experience, honestly. I never considered myself a "people" person (I leave that to my extroverted friend, ----). Yet, to see that this friend of mine who was hurting, really considers us her true family, is... shocking. Not intimating, not scary, just... shocking.

I am not a good person, deep down. I really have done some mean things in these 16 years. I have been betrayed, held grudges, wished for death, and had been the coldest human you would ever meet. Maybe more similarly that one would think, I had similar feelings like my friend. I hated myself, and hated the world, and hated everything. Maybe I yearned for some form of redemption. Some form of consolidation, some last act of goodwill.

I suppose the first step towards this redemption came from when I became a brony in late February 2015. It was then that the hate was abolished; that really good, pure feelings poured through. I carried the lessons that the show, the fandom, and my own personal conceptions, altered for this new, bright, intriguing future. And that led me here, talking with you all, getting support for doing what I did, and knowing that, deep down and in the end, I did the right and truest thing.

I did right.

I did right.

It... feels like forever since I did that.

Not to mention, what I did has come near full circle, and we are all moving onto the next step of our young lives.

FiM taught me to accept what I like. The bronies taught me its okay to like this show. My first two friends, Arctofire and Azrael, supported me throughout my shaky early days. And this fandom... it taught me to do the right thing, during a time that I thought no right ever existed...

I think what I am trying to say is:

Thank you.

Thank you, the bronies, the ones I respect, both hardcore fan and casual, cynical and idealistic, for teaching me something about myself that I had lost: the potential to do good.

Thank you, the show, for helping me realize what I needed to do.

Thank you, Friendship is Magic, the bronies, my friends, my supporters, anyone who gave me kind words and advice. Thank you not only for helping me, but for helping my friend through me. Thank you for being a rock I could lay myself against, to think and contemplate, to let me voice my thoughts and receive honest feedback.

In all honesty, if this fandom didn't exist... well... I think my friend would never have gotten the help she needed. I don't think I would have made that drastic and extremely difficult choice. I don't think I would have done the right thing.

I would have not been a smidgen of a good person, had I not found something that I thought as a good thing.

This isn't a farewell. Rather, this is a transition, into a brighter future, one where hopefully, these troubles that I face in my young life shall eventually pass, and the sun shall shine through again, and I shall feel its warmth on my face—and smile.

Friendship is one thing I lost.

Friendship, in time, I gained.

Friendship lay the groundwork for me trying to improve, and trying to do the right thing.

Friendship set my values, my morals, my beliefs, my attitudes.

Friendship helped.

Friendship taught me to care for life and for others, to not waste this life always hating.

Friendship warmed this cold, cold heart.

Friendship did something that I couldn't do in years.

Friendship gave me hope.

Friendship helped a friend in need.

Friendship indeed.

Friendship is Magic.

Sincerely yours, and hoping to the brightest of days and the most brilliant of nights to all,
-Jarvy Jared