ermehgerd gerrlerrcerrn · 5:56pm Jul 27th, 2014
Hello everyone!
It's been a while, hasn't it? Well, before my last blog post, that is. I've been really busy with stuff. I'm happy to say that I made it through my first year of school! Sorta. It's a bit complicated, but I made it because of a regulation pertaining to sicknesses.
About that sickness, my anxiety disorder: it's been going down. Like, down fast. I put Traveler's Exile on hiatus so I could focus on learning to deal with anxiety, but after christmas, everything just went to shit. I got into this terrible malaise where I couldn't even do my homework because I was either so tense I couldn't do anything, or I just didn't care anymore. The last few months of school have been especially rough. My psychiatrist even recommended I skip it... even though I was still short on points to make it through the year. I didn't get any additional ones anyway, and just spent most of it sick.
I'm slowly recovering now, but to be honest, I'm dreading the next school year. There's so much stuff I want to do, but the tension and anxiety from school makes it incredibly hard. Even writing is incredibly difficult. I didn't even get any done while in Gran Canaria last week, but that was mostly because the room I was in was handily placed right in front of a wharf that was active 24/7. Not a good writing environment.
Regardless, I'm still really happy people appreciate my work. My Little Changeling is still doing very well (it used to be in the top 5, but it dropped off after the most recent dislike), which is surprising, considering the top lists for FiMFiction change all the time. Not a very useful metric, but seeing the same stories return to it has to mean something, at least.
As for what I'm writing next: I'm gonna step off the multi-chapter stories for a bit and do something else. I have a couple of things planned: a collection of episode-ish one-shots about changelings interacting with canon ponies, the Changeling's Guide to Equestrian Races, which will be a humorous look on how changelings look at other races, and possibly a rewrite of Thrown Abroad. The story is old as balls now, and I've improved a lot in the meantime. I want to get rid of the clunkiness of the story, maybe remove some of the ineffectual stuff and just give it some polish. I won't remove the old version, I'll probably put a link to a GDoc of the new version in the description.
Do note that I'm also working on yet another project on the side. I've picked up a group to play D&D, as I've said before, and I'm crafting my own storyline, characters and encounters. It's a lot of fun! I have one finished campaign and one halfway, but the documents are pretty much incomprehensible and miss a lot of information for everyone who isn't me. Shit tends to go off the rails anyway, as my players have already shown: I intended for them to fight and kill a bulette (also known as a landshark), but they instead knocked it out and are training it to be a mount. So now I have to make stats for a mount. I also have to come up with some good puzzles, as I've been relying on combat a lot.
Lastly, I'm heading to Galacon next week! Who knows, maybe I'll see a few of you there.
Also, have a ferret.
Honestly, I can't tell you that I know how you feel, all I can say is that despite everything, in the bigger picture--it's all just luxury, really. If you have what makes you wake up every day and smile--then everything else doesn't matter.
Keep trying, and don't let anything hold you down--but live every day knowing that you will have somewhere and someone to go to. Think about what you hold dear, and think about a clear purpose--what you want to do.
Try reading "How Will You Measure Your Life?" by Clayton M. Christensen. Will probably give you insight.
Anyways, sorry for getting all like that. You're freakin' awesome, and you've got all of us around, cheering you on every day!
Btw, how's Slinky da ferret?! OMG so cute ^^!
2320356 Slinky's doing very well! He's finally learned that he's not supposed to poop under tables. He's sleeping in my lap right now, in what looks like a really uncomfortable position. Then again, he's a ferret.
2320364 That's right, they're supposed to poop on top of 'em xD
I guess those guys are super flexible :P
I said it once, i say it anytime again:
Take as much time as you need.
You are a great Author (and what i can tell from your blogposts, your storys and the way you handle your characters, a great person as well) and i would rather read new stuff from you yesterday than tomorrow, but your reallife has priority.
I can´t tell about anxiety disorder, but i know how it is to feeling down.
My grandfather used to tell me then, that no matter what you do, as long as you at least get one smile and thank you for it, it is worth it.
So here you go:
Thank you for these great storys of yours.
Thank you for these brilliant characters like suncloack and his friends.
And thank you, that you keep on moving on and not giving up.
And you know what? I think we both know, that it wont be stay by this one thank you.
So, i wish you fun at the Galacon. Germany is a great country, once you know it.
If i may ask: Where are your from?
2320606 Thank you! I'm from the Netherlands, so Germany is very close by.
2320621 Hey, than we are nearly neighbours! As a matter of speaking.
To bad, i don´t have Time or money to go to galacon...
To be honest, I was satisfied after reading "Thrown Abroad". You don't need to push yourself any harder on your readers' behalf. "Friendship is Weird" was like a bonus. If your next work takes forever to finish, well... then it takes forever to finish.
Frankly, I'm just glad that you're still breathing.
I'm not very good at eloquent phrasing, but your works are some of my favorite on this site. I would just like you to know that we support you and that any true fan of your work will be more than willing to wait.
That said, your ideas sound amazing! I would read any of those in a heartbeat!
Faith, Trust, and Pixie Dust;
MaruTheWonderbolt
obi-wan hates ferrets?
You seem very comfortable with sharing your feelings on fimfic. Doesn't that make you at least a little anxious?
2335038 Not really. I feel like I at least owe everyone a sufficiently detailed explanation. Plus, I feel the most comfort expressing myself through the written word. It's very liberating!
2338082 Fair enough. Writing is a lot different to speaking in person.