TWP: A Review · 10:14am Mar 14th, 2014
Holy crow! I just got the longest, most comprehensive review of TWP. … Maybe the only truly comprehensive review of TWP. It has been a year since it ended, and I am surprised it still gets a lot of readers. (Maybe because people think they need it as background for RoH or SCS... [Spoiler! They don’t!])
Anyway! Here are snarky comments to selected exerts.
one of the top ten longest fan fictions on the entire site
Holy crow! I didn’t know that was (still) true! (Just wait until SCS catches up…)
cliché episodes kind of make the whole stories bread and butter
And sandwiches!
no literal attempt to advance itself
Finally someone who gets my writing!
instead progressing through the development of emotions between the characters
Total afterthought! I swear! Please don’t hate me!
The development of the characters may turn may people off, however, due to an extraordinary amount of shipping, with the notable lack of much culmination of such romantical whimsies.
The ships were also an afterthought, and the thing I absolutely HATE about this story. I seriously hated all the shipping that I put in this story. Hated it by chapter 20. Hated it throughout the whole series. I know this is my story and I should defend it, but I will never defend the horrible shipping. It was utterly disgusting. I intentionally put lines and developments in SCS that callout, repudiate and disown the level of shipping in TWP. Not to the level to undo the damage, but enough to be a start to make me no longer dislike some of the relationships that come up.
THE ANALYSIS
You mean I did things other than try to tell a story my way? Why does this always happen to me!
It added the thought that the story might never end, and indeed, it seemed never to.
That was the original intent until around chapter 85 when I just ran out of ideas. Thankfully, I started up SCS and got back to writing RoH at the same time, so I got to continue the story my way.
It screamed, “I know I’m not being original, and I’m loud and obnoxious about it”
Finally someone who gets my writing!
Del. Just, this character made the entire last half of the story for me. …
Del. I feel she needs two points here, because she was by far my favorite in the story.
Del is my little angel. I love her too much. I always cry when I read myself writing something bad happening to her. I just want her to be happy!
The Power Block, in particular, was an amazing setting to put plot into.
Based entirely on a combination of two Gamestops!
the only chapter that I could not finish reading was chapter 99
It was a clip show. You didn’t miss anything… except that bonus/extended scenes from various chapters (including the last ten). It was only about ⅓ new content.
{the bad} The sheer volume of OC’s.
Then you might want to avoid RoH and SCS since those are the main characters…
{the bad} The sub plots.
Do several concurrent background plots count? That is sort of what I aim for with SCS and RoH…
I will be reading my way through the two companion stories, to see what happens, and hopefully they are as good as this one has already been.
*Looks at the last to exerts* I hope that stays the true once you get going…
{the bad} I still to this point have no idea what Mimi’s or Silver Fox’s character is, other than the basics
Absolutely understandable.
{the bad} If half of the OC’s were replaced by canon background ponies
Never would have happened since most of the background characters were relatively unknown or uncared about at the time of the writing. Back when I was reading more (back before mid season 2), Derpy and Octavia were the main background characters that I saw getting a lot of development. Once I drifted away, we started seeing more development of the characters in the show and that got me liking them more. Now, we have an abundance of great one-off characters (read: Coco) that I would love to use in some capacity (read: especially our goddess and best fashion pony, Coco). SCS sees more ‘background’ ponies used, mainly since it is seven years later and I wanted to use as many of the older foals as possible.
{the bad} if at least one character isn’t someone that I already empathize with, it’s just not going to affect me
Thankfully, (almost) all my OCs were introduced in TWP so they have some development already when their relationships are developed more in SCS/RoH…
The idea of developing characters from their show personalities into the fan canon slowly through events was really nice also.
Here is a major shocker that I feel like I have a hard time getting across when it comes up: Virtually none of my headcanon makes it into anything I write. … Except about Fagballs Sentry (who I may or may not have whole essays how he is the true villain of Equestria Girls). And maybe about our beloved Sunset Shimmer who deserves her own series where she travels around in a van solving mysteries while Applejack and Winona ride in the back and eat dog treats together. (Actually, if you found out via RoH how I relate Sunny to a certain princess, that is totally not headcanon. Purely something I thought would be awesome and make her backstory more painful when she crossed.)
Edit:
It is written in a slice of life style after the famed dr. Who series
Honestly, I found that very restricting. (Also, *Doctor.) I didn't like trying to make every chapter feel 'Doctory'. The Master Game was probably my last hurrah in that field since I felt so liberated to no longer have to rely on making Doctor Who references constantly. SCS started getting filled with Star Wars and Star Trek references as well as to other shows and movies I love. Feels so good too no longer have to do that.
The whole review is found here. Give it a read. It is worth it and pretty dang accurate to how I feel too (for the most part). Be nice if you disagree, Tibbles! (Though I wouldn’t mind watching a battle in the comments ala what you did in RoH recently. Always worth a laugh.)
In other news, I am torn between trying to work on some short essays for art class and trying to work on SCS. I know I have just over a week to finish it (since the next chapter has been done for months), but I want to get it and the chapter after it (Tibbles is looking forward to that one ;D) finished so I can have a huge backlog.
Oh! And if you follow my art blog on tamblr, there will be some RoH ‘spoilers’ coming this weekend. Not really spoilers since the one spoiler sketch is something that will be seen in the next chapter (and has been hinted/explicitly stated already).
Thanks for reading. Keep being the best readers in the world! Love you all!
PS: Sorry for using Tibbles still, but that is easier to remember…
PPS: If you are a fan of cool people streaming cool things, SuperJeenius will be streaming Long Live the Queen later today, around 3PM US Pacific time. Also, AttackingTucans will be doing a VS against himself live starting around 3PM US Pacific time on Saturday. Might have to fire up Multi-Twitch if ProtonJon starts streaming this weekend too…
PPPS: Does anyone want to help me name a future chapter? To qualify, write me a short essay on Paul Gauguin. Eight lines on his biography, short description of five of his works, then an opinion of him in my words. Due by Midnight Sunday US Pacific time…
the tibbles is okay, i still use it as my steam name
imma not do a comment battle. imma working on a fan project. ill pm the first one soon
Gee, that may be the first time I have seen an author feature one of my reviews with responses. This is really nice, to be able to see how authors themselves react to these reviews that i make. I'm working on starting a youtube channel dedicated to video reviews of fanfictions, and this helped to improve my ability to relate to the author on how they thought their story should have been.
Thanks!.
1932368
It would have been rude not to acknowledge the review, especially since it is the first review I've gotten. Ever. If your review of this story ends up on EqD, then I'll consider it justice for their two sentence dismissal of TWP two years ago.
I like to celebrate everything I'm given, even if it is just thanking them. I love sharing everything made for my stories. You put work into making something, and that should be appreciated.