Sarge Says Hi (and tries to be strong for you) · 4:03am February 25th
My goal for this year is finishing Reckless in Training.
I continue to update Sea Dreams. More than likely, I’ll miss my personal February deadline for it, because depression is creeping back, both naturally and because of work. But I’ll try and write.
In addition, a misaligned overview of my projects (read: what I’ve been thinking about):
The Candlemaker and The White Duchess — Outlining is in a more mental stage at present, but the stories I want to tell with these have definitely breached the ‘beyond comfortable’ territory. It’s now planned at 4 stories. This is exciting stuff for me, but right now, I just cannot pursue it without good spirits.
- On the bright side, the newest addition to this trilogy->saga expansion can be published standalone. It would come sooner than my initially planned full trilogy release.
Interlopers and Bathorse, My Birdhorse — Two more things I’d normally never write but wanted to get decently out of my comfort zone with.
- Interlopers has an incredibly profane character and definitely the most vulgar personality I’ve tried to capture. Offensive and crass to my furthest extremes.
- Bathorse, My Birdhorse treads the ever-dreadful lines of love and consent. I should’ve started attempting this years ago: now would (key word: would) be the worst time to get uncertain about the content of my works.
- Cypress Zero additions — I’m so happy with this story right now, and could see myself happily writing a sequel. But with all the stress I’m putting on myself, I just want more people to read it and enjoy it as much as I do.
- Peerless sequel: Sapient — Previous post, here. Without a doubt, I am a masochist. This story is tearing me apart to think about. Firstly, it’s the only properly thematic HiE I want to pursue. Secondly, it’s so personal and emotional that it destroys me and brings me to tears thinking about what it would mean to have it available. I already get sad enough that I don’t want to look at Peerless the way I do with my other recent works. But without pain, I’m without growth. I’d like to get it done at some point this year.
- Fair Pony Prices — My desire to explore and tackle the concepts and themes of consent have kind of melded into Bathorse, My Birdhorse. I doubt I’ll hop back to this story about an enslaved pegasus anytime soon.
- Griff Grit — I posted about this one. It’s on the growing list of ‘stories I wish I was in a better headspace for’. I couldn’t do it, or the others, justice. I need to consolidate what little energy I have for writing.
- A variety of lesser stories I’ve shown to a few, all character pieces or tales of worldbuilding, that I’ve quietly stopped talking about — I’m sorry.
- And that one exercise turned semi-CYOA — Gods, I’m so sorry. I’ll come back for Overo and Sashay, I promise.
I’m happy with my writing, I feel. I just want to be in a better place to do more of it. As it stands now, it feels like I’ve written an amount of works that leaves me content, but at the same time, I’m discontent with what stories I have to offer you. And to clarify this for once, you are my friend. Thank you for reading and following anything of mine.
In essence, I’ve never really felt like that much of a good storyteller, and I want to make new, dangerous, more invoking pieces that are stories worth sharing.
Unfortunately, undermining all of this planning, I’ve been thinking non-stop about something in particular: I once said that I’ve gotten increasingly recluse as a result of my depression. So, I’ll end with this, because it’s better than a flat apology.
Time to yourself is important. But only if you make good use of it and ‘practice proper self-maintenance’, I guess you could say.
Don’t be reckless; that’s my job. And I always do it gladly for you.
- Sarge
There’s always a struggle of work-life balance present, but hey, isn't harmonizing stuff is what ponies all about?
I hope that things will go more easy on you soon!
Go for it
From one old war horse to another. Only ten years your junior, retired, and dealing with PTSD. Just put one hoof in front of the others and press on. I enjoy your stories. You have good stuff here! I know how hard it is to just soldier on, but I do it every day and I know you can too. When life gives you lemons....burn the Orchard, till the soil, plant new trees, march forward, and smile knowing you've come a long way. Old age is a full arm of stripes and hash marks to wear with pride. We owe that to those we know who did not make it to where we are. Most of all....Have fun!
You got this!
Take your time, be sure to allow yourself time to process the emotions. I don't know nothing about being a veteran, but I respect the hella out of those ponies that put their lives for the rest of us.
And if you ever just need to talk, we are here to listen.
See you later and hopefully you'll knock it out of the park!
We'll be here rooting for you however long it takes!