Story Breakdown - MLDC Next Generation: Know Fear! · 2:00am Jan 28th, 2023
In my early days in the fandom (2014), I absolutely adored this fic. It's one of the things that made me fall in love with this fandom. It was a great rendition of Kilala's next-gen universe.
This story breakdown is inspired by The Six Act Structure. In my opinion, it's the best kind of story structure that allows for engaging stories. It is used in films like Avatar, The Matrix, Star Wars, Iron Man, The Hunger Games, Back to the Future, etc. Here are examples of their story breakdowns, which this will be very much like.
Without further ado, let's begin!
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Dramatic Phase One: The Setup
All of the main characters are introduced. The story world and its mechanics are established. Foundations are laid for the main throughline, subplots and central conflict.
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Act 1: Dealing With An Imperfect Situation
A character in an Imperfect Situation faces Oppressive Opposition as he pursues an Initial Goal. But when there is a Disturbance to his routine, he faces a Dilemma regarding his situation, and must assume a New Role.
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Starburst, a princess of Equestria, wants more love and affection from her mother (imperfect situation), and is dealt with the threat of the griffon emperor and wing commanders (oppressive opposition) while she wants to join the Royal Guard (initial goal). But when she learns that Stalliongrad has been attacked (the disturbance), she asks Nidra to create a disguise for her (the dilemma) and become a royal guard (the new role).
Hook: A city inhabited by ponies is under occupation by the Griffon Empire. A griffon wing commander by the name of Steel Wing, tells his soldiers how griffons are superior to ponies and are meant to be their slaves. He decapitates the father of a pony family, and when soldiers are about to kill what remains of the victim’s family, a pegasus pony surrounded by yellow light appears after she kills them. She is fear incarnate.
The Imperfect Situation: Starburst lives her life as a princess. While she likes working at Sweet Apple Acres, she feels she doesn’t get enough love from her mother, Twilight Sparkle. Her country is bullied by the Griffon Empire’s emperor and wing command.
Goal 1 - Initial Goal: Starburst dreams of being a member of the Royal Guard.
Opposition 1 - Oppressive Opposition: Emperor Stratus and his wing command show up at Canterlot and intimidate the royals. Not only do they want to reclaim Stalliongrad as their territory, but also want to secede from the Order of Nations. Meanwhile, Starburst’s parents express their lack of support in letting her join the Royal Guard.
Catalyst 1 - The Disturbance: The griffons attack Stalliongrad and the news of it is broadcasted through Equestria, putting the ponies in a panic. Starburst is left distraught, wondering why they would do such a thing. Ponies are asking her questions of why it's happening, but she cannot give them an answer.
Turning Point 1 - The Dilemma: After being denied from joining the Royal Guard by her parents, she visits the Royal Library to find a particular spellbook. Her friend Nidra helps her find a book that has a “Glamour Charm” spell. She convinces Nidra to cast the spell on her so she can create an illusion of another pony on her as a disguise so she can join the Royal Guard operation to Stalliongrad.
The New Role: With her disguise, Starburst finally goes from being just a princess, to a member of the Royal Guard (for now).
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Act 2: Learning the Rules of An Unfamiliar Situation
The character Learns the Rules of an Unfamiliar Situation and faces Incidental Opposition in pursuit of a Transitional Goal. But when he receives a Reality Check, he makes a Commitment to his New Role.
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Starburst sneaks into the Royal Guard ranks, despite having no combat experience apart from sparring with her cousin Valiant Heart (the unfamiliar situation), and faces griffon attacks for the first time (incidental opposition) while she deploys into Stalliongrad (the transitional goal). But when she bites off more than she can chew while dealing with the griffons (the reality check), she becomes a fear lantern and no longer needs to be an RG to defend Equestria (the commitment).
The Unfamiliar Situation: Starburst boards the military airship known as the Nightingale under the disguise as Private Daisy Cutter, and meets Lieutenant Sunny Skies. She is about to see combat for the very first time in her life, and has no military experience whatsoever. The threats she’s about to face will put what little fighting skills she’s learned from her cousin Valiant Heart to the test. Later, she meets a ring that contains extraordinary powers, and gradually learns how to use it against her foes.
Goal 2 - Transitional Goal: Starburst prepares for deployment into Stalliongrad.
Opposition 2 - Incidental Opposition: The Nightingale is under attack by griffon forces. Starburst volunteers to accompany the supply drop for its protection. As Starburst and Sunny dive down, they are under griffon fire. Ultimately, the Nightingale completely explodes and crashes, leaving Star and Sunny as the remaining survivors as they fall behind enemy lines. After grabbing hold of a mysterious ring, she slowly but surely learns how to use it against the griffon forces, and barely defeats Steel Wing in a difficult fight. A large fleet of griffon airships come her way.
Catalyst 2 - The Reality Check: Due to her lack of combat experience, Starburst hesitates to kill a fearful griffon, giving him an opening to strangle her to near death, until she is saved by Sunny Skies, who then gives Star a stern wakeup call. Eventually, Star loses her glamour in battle and her cover is blown, making Sunny furious that the daughter of Twilight Sparkle is out on the front lines.
Separated from Sunny Skies, Starburst is attacked by more griffons and is forcefully pinned down by them as they attempt to rape her. Suddenly, a twinkle of yellow light appears, which allows her to regain the upper hand and fight off her attackers, strengthening her resolve as the pony princess that griffons fear. Starburst is then chosen by a ring of yellow light. She uses a sword construct against her griffon foes, effectively killing them.
Turning Point 2 - The Commitment: Starburst starts interacting with the ring, and learning how to use what it’s capable of. While doing this, she faces the griffon commander Steel Wing. She narrowly beats him using her ring’s powers. Still getting the hang of her ring, she takes on even more griffon forces, using whatever weapons she can imagine using her ring. After she takes out a massive fleet of griffon airships, she successfully liberates Stalliongrad. Her bond with the ring continues to grow stronger. She loses consciousness after the long and hard fought battle while suffering many injuries.
Starburst wakes up in a hospital in Canterlot, full of bandages and stitches. Weeks later, her parents announce that she is banned from ever joining the Royal Guard, and is grounded to Ponyville. After arriving at the Golden Oaks library, she receives a message from Sinestro, leader of the Fear Lantern Corps, explaining the origin of his corps. Now that her hopes and dreams of being a royal guard have officially been shot, she fully adapts into her new role as the Fear Lantern.
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Dramatic Phase Two: Confrontation
The character is thrown in the middle of the Central Conflict and is placed at direct odds with the forces of antagonism. He undergoes a series of successes and failures as he works toward resolving the main throughline.
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Act 3: Stumbling Into The Central Conflict
The character stumbles into the Central Conflict and faces Intentional Opposition in pursuit of a False Goal. But when there is a grave Turn of events, he has a Moment of Truth.
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Starburst continues her fight against the griffons (the central conflict) and has the fullest attention from the griffon emperor and wing command (intentional opposition) as she tries to make sure that nobody knows who the Fear Lantern really is (the false goal). But when she finds that her mother has been captured and tortured (the turn), she is forced to reveal her identity in order to save her (the moment of truth).
The Central Conflict: Starburst continues facing the griffon menace after they have taken over Maretonia and other Equestrian cities.
Goal 3 - False Goal: Starburst aims to keep a low profile while being Equestria’s sole defender as the Fear Lantern.
Opposition 3 - Intentional Opposition: Starburst becomes the griffon wing command’s public enemy number one. The Griffon Empire attacks various cities in Equestria. Cloudsdale is later attacked as well, with the intention of relocating it to the Griffon Empire’s capital, Griffonia. When Starburst enters Cloudsdale, she singlehoofedly takes out the occupying army of griffons, including the griffon Pretenders who infiltrated it, and even comes face to face with the wing commander, Shadow Wing. After finding that her mother had been captured, she kills her captors and fights Steel Wing in a second round, and wins.
Catalyst 3 - The Turn: When Twilight Sparkle goes on a mission to Maretonia to retake the territory, she and Valiant Heart are attacked by Steel Wing. Pinpoint, a Royal Guard traitor working for the griffons, helps Steel Wing capture them using a band of RGs under his control. After being imprisoned, Twilight is taken outside and is publicly flogged through broadcast for all ponies of Equestria to hear, including her daughter, Starburst.
Turning Point 3 - The Moment of Truth: Enraged from hearing from her mother’s screams of pain and agony, Starburst recharges her ring, revealing her identity as the Fear Lantern in front of her friends, their parents, and all the ponies who witnessed the Equestrian princess’s flogging. As she saves her mother from further punishment, she faces Steel Wing in a rematch. After she finally defeats him, Starburst meets Pinpoint and they return to Twilight’s airship, the Avalon. When she finds that Pinpoint aided her mother’s capture, she kills him along with his brainwashed RGs. When she passes out from her final attack, the Fear Lantern’s true identity is revealed to Twilight and Valiant..
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Act Four: Implementing A Doomed Plan
The character implements a Doomed Plan and faces Self-Inflicted Opposition in pursuit of a Penultimate Goal. But when an unthinkable Lowpoint occurs, he pulls himself together and discovers a Newfound Resolve.
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Starburst’s new friend Sunny Skies breaks her out of her cell to escape (the doomed plan) and are pursued by the RGs and Valiant Heart (self-inflicted opposition) as they attempt to get out of Canterlot (the penultimate goal). Sunny sacrifices herself to save Starburst from getting shot at by a cannon turret (the lowpoint), leaving Star having had enough with the Royal Guard, and plans to invade Griffonia, the griffon capital, after visiting her friend’s grave (the newfound resolve).
The Doomed Plan: After being imprisoned in the Canterlot dungeon for killing twelve innocent royal guards, Starburst is busted out by Sunny Skies so she can reclaim her ring taken from her by her mother and get out of Canterlot. They take on RGs along the way, including Valiant Heart.
Goal 4 - The Penultimate Goal: Starburst and Sunny attempt to escape Canterlot together
Opposition 4 - Self-Inflicted Opposition: Having no support from her mother and cousin as the Fear Lantern, Starburst is left without hope. When Sunny Skies break out of her cell, they clash with Nocturne Night Guards coming their way. In order for Starburst to retrieve her ring, Sunny paralyzes three night guards, Hot Head, Amber Lilly, and Lucky Star, all of whom are friends of Anthea, a friend of Starburst.
After Starburst successfully steals her ring from the vault, she and Sunny find that they are prevented from leaving Canterlot by a magical barrier. Suddenly, they cross paths with Valiant Heart and a whole army of RGs, all who seek to apprehend Starburst. Starburst and Valiant engage in an evenly matched bout, showing strength not seen in any of their sparring matches. It occurred to Star that she’s not dealing with a horde of griffon soldiers or a wing commander, but a highly skilled alicorn, armed with a pair of magic swords no less.
Catalyst 4 - The Lowpoint: Just when it seemed that Valiant Heart successfully coaxed Starburst into giving herself in, the RGs fire a cannon turret at Starburst’s wings. Sunny Jumps into the line of fire while throwing Star out of the way, making the cannon hit her instead. With Starburst unable to heal her, Sunny ultimately dies from the shot, marking a devastating loss for Star.
Turning Point 4 - Starburst unleashes her fury against the RGs. She puts all the might of her attacks onto Valiant Heart until she finally bests him. She tells him that he’s the reason that she’s become who he is, and can no longer trust his family or the Royal Guard. She leaves canterlot.
Starburst visits Sunny’s grave in a pegasus mausoleum in Cloudsdale. She hears her friend, Prism Bolt, talk about his admiration of Star to Sunny Skies as she lays dead. As Starburst leaves, she prepares for her final assault on Griffonia, the griffon capital.
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Dramatic Phase Three: Resolution
The character and the forces of antagonism engage in a final confrontation to resolve the Central Conflict. The main throughline and all additional subplots are resolved. The new status quo is established.
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Act Five: Trying A Longshot
The character tries a Longshot and faces Ultimate Opposition while trying to accomplish the Ultimate Goal. But just when it seems All is Lost, he makes a Final Push against the forces of antagonism and either succeeds or fails.
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Starburst invades Griffonia and the emperor's palace (the longshot), and must overcome the griffon forces that come into her path (ultimate opposition) to ensure that she ends their emperor’s reign of terror (the ultimate goal). But when that Shadow Wing impales her, putting her at death’s door (all is lost), her ring unlocks his weakness and she finally defeats him (the final push).
The Longshot: Ready to face Emperor Stratus, and determined to end the griffon war once and for all, Starburst infiltrates Griffonia and his palace. It is her against a whole griffon army. She feels deep down in her gut that this will be her last fight while living on Equus. She faces Shadow Wing in a second round as she engages her onslaught.
Goal 5 - Ultimate Goal: Starburst seeks to put Emperor Stratus out of commission for good.
Opposition 5 - Ultimate Opposition: Starburst is dealt with full resistance of griffon forces, ranging from infantry, to airships, to artillery. Starburst fends them off with her constellation constructs and wreaks all sorts of havoc with them. Afterward, Star takes on a group of griffon Pretenders and virtually turns them into mincemeat. She finally comes face to face with Stratus and Shadow Wing.
Catalyst 5 - All Is Lost: Not wishing to stoop to the Griffon Empire’s level, Starburst decides to spare Stratus so he can be put on trial for his crimes. Ultimately, Shadow Wing decides to kill him instead. After overwhelming Star with his dark magic, Shadow Wing nails her to a pillar in her gut with his spear. He takes his ring from her, rendering her powerless and leaving her at his mercy. She is on the brink of her demise.
Turning Point 5 - The Final Push: Images of Starburst’s loved ones in her head allows her to cling onto her life. Since Shadow Wing has no fear, he is not worthy of the ring he had taken from Star. Her monologue towards him allows the ring to grow brighter. While Shadow Wing is engulfed by the ring’s yellow light, Star forces the spear that she was impaled on out of her. She fires her fear shine against him as her final blow, mentally obliterating him. Starburst emerges victorious.
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Act Six: Living In The New Situation
Having accomplished (or failed to have accomplished) the Ultimate Goal, the character is shown living in a New Situation.
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Stratus is dead, as Starburst continues her fight against the griffons away from Equestria so she can protect her friends, while the possibility of new lanterns loom.
The New Situation: Having defeated Emperor Stratus and Shadow Wing, Starburst returns to Equestria so Anthea can heal her. After saying goodbye to her coltfriend Golden Delicious, she leaves Equestria again to continue fighting the griffons. Shadow Wing now becomes a Black Lantern. Two stars, one orange and one pink, and representing avarice and love, approach Equus, leaving a hook for the sequel.
Thanks this helps me as a writer a lot
5711250
You're most welcome! There's another fic that I was involved with that also uses this structure called Flurry In Time, though that one would be rather tricky for me to break down. But I might try it one day.
5711258
Cool
Currently planning on rewriting the first chapter of a fic I did that flopped (it felt rushed)
Also trying to figure out the plot for another story I am planning on writing
But I have a good idea for it