"Well if it isn’t old chicken-and-dumplings. Hello Gilda.”

“Hello yourself, yard-art. Heard you were dating a garden gnome—you bring ‘im?”

“Oh, you—heh! But seriously: it seems Fluttershy wins again. I bet her you wouldn’t dare show that thing you call a face at this little soiree.”

“Then it looks like you got owned by Equestria’s biggest bedwetter. Again—OUCH!”

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Alan Swann (Peter O'Toole): Those are movies, damn you! Look at me! I'm flesh and blood, life-size, no larger! I'm not that silly God-damned hero! I never was!

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Oh my God. Fluttershy and Discord.

Doesn't anyone see they're Jenny Wren and Mr. Riah?

Fluttershy is crippled by being earth-bound, Discord is a hated alien.

And she reforms him. She shames him into good behavior.

"...NOT. YOUR. FRIEND..."

"...you're the big, bad wolf!"

Dear Santa,

I've been a good boy all year, mostly, and the one thing I want most of all is a Dropkick Murphys cover of "Christmas in Killarny."

Work with me on this, OK?

(Your fist, you know
It missed your beau
While struggling under the mistletoe
But you'd had several whiskeys, so
Your aim was a wee bit off.

Yeah. That's about the size of it...)

Look, all I want to do is to get thoughtful, tasteful gifts for my friends and family.

And I could do it much more quickly if all these other people engaged in crass consumerism weren't in line ahead of me at the store.

...it'd have to be something that would keep you delightfully entertained while at the same time destroying your will to live.

Maybe he'd start with:

Indestructible!
Indefensible!
Reprehensible!
Ten thousand years of unerasable acts
And permanent facts
The record of my
Unspeakable crimes...

And finish with:

..and if you lose hope
Take dope
And lock yourself in the john--
Why must the show go on?

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Good game everybody!

There once was a children's adventure series in which a little toffee-nosed git of a polymath snarked his way around time and space in an improbably-named conveyance and with the help of a loyal but relatively immature assistant created and/or fixed all manner of problems with the time-stream.

It came out in 1959.

"No, no, wait," you say "you've got the date wrong. It was 1963."

No. I mean 1959.

"But this year is the fiftieth anniversary of Doctor Who and if you do the math..."

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...since there seemed to be some interest.

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