Danny, Doctor of the Gods

by Sage Quill

If I Die Can I Be Called 'Danny Phantom'

My breath came in shallow gasps of thinning air as I hiked up one of the many peaks of the Picos de Europa; a mountain range that spanned the northern coast of Spain. Despite the biting cold of the high reaches, sweat dripped into my eyes from under my fleece jacket's hood, and my ruck sack kept biting into my shoulders, reminding me of how many hours I'd been attempting my climb. It didn't bother me though; just a part of the experience.

Honestly, I had no reason to be there other than the sad excuse of getting side tracked from the pilgrimage trail.

What? It's no fun if you always follow the signs, and the snow covered tip of that beast was just calling me.

I was just about to crest the spur leading to my destination when my boot got caught in a small crevice under the snow, and with my cat like reflexes proceeded to fall flat on my face.

"Ow! Okay, what the hell hands! Were you planning on stopping my fall or do you just not care? Seriously, we gotta stick together... Even if we are kinda stuck together already-and holy Christ I better get back to civilization before I find a volleyball ball and really start to lose it." I said, 'it' being my sanity of course.

Once again I was touching on a recurring issue that tends to come from traveling alone for long periods of time. Most people think it's okay to talk to yourself from time to time but my case was becoming just a bit beyond my control.

"I also really have to stop narrating everything I do. I mean that's just not normal," I deadpanned, knowing that it wasn't going to happen.

With a stifled groan I got my hands under me and found some purchase in the form of another nearby fissure and managed to pull my foot out of that bastard of a hole. I winced when I noticed that it wasn't just my face and pride that was hurt, but my ankle as well.

"Ha! Foolish hole thing! You think a sprained ankle can stop Daniel Weathers?!" I yelled indignantly at the offending crevice, "Well you're absolutely right! Time for a break."

I mustered my dignity and hauled myself into a sitting position next to a nearby outcropping of rock. By the time I was settled and had removed my ruck I was ready for some mid-climb entertainment. For me that meant a bag of beef jerky and my iPhone. I scrolled through the menu of the videos app and pulled up the latest installment of the best form of recreational media on the planet; My Little Pony.

"Aaaaawwwwwwww yeeeeeeaaaaaaaah...."

Who do you ask would spend the hellish amount of money on an international data plan with as little dead zone as possible to watch a show about magical ponies? This guy. I figured that an episode of hilarity and a half-quart of water and I'd be good for another round against the Mt. Everast wanna be. At least, that was my assumption after drawing on my vast well of experience in the art of sucking through a long ruck march. The military teaches you these things, and I didn't suffer through five years of it to just up and forget all that 'hooah' crap. So I past the time laughing it up as my favorite equine heroines learned about the magic of friendship in the most painful and hilarious ways possible, downing half my canteen in the process.

By the time I was finished I noted the sun was getting a little too low for comfort. I'd packed for varying weather as the Santa de Compostila pilgrimage passes through multiple countries with differing climates, but spending the night on a snowy ridge at eight thousand feet wasn't what I'd had in mind.

It was with great disappointment that I stood up from my sitting position and faced the path I'd been following up the draw. I was so preoccupied with my sullen mood that I failed to note where the crevice that I'd fallen into had been.

The universe decreed at that point that I should pay for my arrogance by enacting Murphy's Law.

Murphy is a sadistic asshole by the way, and when my foot sank into the snow I found my center of gravity, that I had so confidently set into forward motion, kept going instead of stopping.

Now instead of falling on my face again (something that only happens when you're traveling uphill), I began rolling down the mountain in the most painful fashion fate had decided I'd roll: laterally and head first.

I would have become sick with the sky and earth changing places every second or so if I wasn't busy screaming my head off, or at least trying. The cries came out intermittently, halting abruptly every time my head and back impacted the hard rocky mountain side. It sounded like what you'd expect from a comedy movie only less funny because I was likely falling to my death.

The relief I felt when I was no longer being slammed into solid rock was short lived when I realized that wasn't a good thing. Now it was Newton's turn to deliver a swift kick to my balls, and he wasn't in a good mood that day-then again neither was I so it kinda evened out I guess.

Most kids believe that when you fall off a cliff you catch hang time like in the cartoons, but that is complete bullshit. Immediately after I stopped hitting the ground the gut wrenching feeling of accelerating to the maximum ability of my mass took over and I really did vomit.

The wind ripped by me, forcing me into a wild tumble as the base of the cliff rose to meet my tender, unprepared body with jagged rocks and certain death.

At this point I would have prayed to God if I had been even the slightest bit religious, which I wasn't, but the looming aspect of hitting the ground at terminal velocity was a real motivator.

"Whoever or whatever's out there I would really appreciate it if you could maybe SAVE MY ASS FROM TURNING INTO A RED SMEAR ON THE SCARY ROCKS OF DEATH!"

Nothing...

They say when faced with death, humans tend to find what they regret in life. Surprisingly, I did find somthing I regretted. I'd dreamed of going to med school and becoming a doctor, but I guess that'll never happen... Damnit. I wanted to be the kind of doctor that went to aid struggling third world countries and really make a difference. I'd spent enough time in the army taking from, instead of giving to life. I wanted atonement.

The grey spires of uncaring stone were all that dominated my vision at this point so I closed my eyes to wait for the inevitable, abrupt end to my twenty-six years of life.

...

...

...

"Okay, what the hell! Why am I not dead yet?" I grumbled in agitation, opening my eyes to find inky blackness stretching out in all directions, "Alright, maybe I am dead...huh, this is pretty boring actually."

Flinging my arms forward and grabbing my knees, I started doing flips within the endless void of nothingness. It's not like I had anything better to do.

I continued like this for a second or two before a light became visible in the distance.

"So this is the light at the end of he tunnel thing I hear so much about." I tapped my chin for a moment in thought as I considered the strange glow. "Well unless it's going to come to me I don't see how this is gonna work."

I proved my point with exaggerated swimming motions that, as I predicted, did jack shit besides make me look like a retard. Go figure.

Just as I was about to give up and go back to eternally drifting in an empty expanse of nothing, the light decided it was time to stop teasing me like a catholic girl with a web cam and rocketed toward me. I say 'rocketed' because judging from the rate at which it was growing it had to be flying like a bat out of hell.

It just kept getting bigger, and I started to feel the need to piss myself by the time it filled the entirety of my vision. The sight was similar to watching the sun from a distance that would vaporize most known substances, and I happened to like my substance the way it was; solid.

Despite my reservations the light gave off very little heat. 'Warmth' was the best term to describe it. It was almost... caring.

I coughed nervously at the thought. "I mean manly things-uh-beef jerky, and bear wrestling... Oh, and shark punching! The manliest kind of punching there is."

"DANIEL WEATHERS," came a booming voice that forced me to cover my ears against a verbal onslaught of caps-lock proportions.

"What!?" I yelled back through the leftover ringing of my now nearly deaf ears, "Sorry god-like sun...thing, but I can't hear you over the sound of how LOUD you are!"

"..."

Now it was just pouting. Do god-like sun deities pout?

I thought of Princess Celestia and the answer became abundantly clear.

"Daniel Weathers," it spoke again in a much more amiable volume.

"Yep, that's me. So-ahhh-your sunny-ness to what do I owe the pleasure of your extremely bright company?"

Being a smartass was a natural defense mechanism I had when dealing with things that scare the shit out of me, but the supernova megaphone didn't need to know that.

"I have come, young Daniel, to offer you another chance at life in exchange for your services. My name is Pelor; god of light, strength, traveling, and healing. And I have chosen you to be my bishop in a world that desperately needs the light of goodness to see it through its dark future."

"Really?" I replied skeptically, "Of all the badass heroes you could have chosen you want me? That doesn't invite much confidence in my new patron diety's judgment now does it?"

"..." It was defiantly pouting again.

"I have seen your heart Daniel. You possess both the spirit of a warrior and the gentleness of a healer. It is for these qualities you have been chosen to represent me and carry my favor." It ignored my deflection, showing incredible skill for stage acting to recover from that kind of derailing comment. "I grant you Ajira's Rod, one of the Dawnstar relics to carry out my will. As your actions reflect your soul the secrets of the relic will be revealed, allowing you to access more of its power, but only when it deems you are ready to wield it."

A flash of light erupted from my hand, blinding me for a few seconds before I could feel the texture of metal in my grip. When the spots cleared from my vision the most beautifully crafted mace I'd ever seen was held tightly in my grasp. Its golden metal was shaped into intricately formed fans that resembled stylized sun rays, and silver leaves trailed up the shaft, enlayed into artful designs that depicted the very essence of summer.

For once I couldn't think of something smart to say. The feeling emanating from the golden mace was one of overwhelming awe.

"Lastly, I grant you the body of my oldest friend and faithful steed, Star Thought. The ki-rin are a proud race that serve the greater good through all dark times, may you bring honor to their name through your deeds." Another flash of light, but this one seemed to come from everywhere at once, and when the worst had past I found myself drifting off into a forced slumber.

Just before my eyes closed, a figure emerged from the depths of the fiery corona of light. His beard and hair were shock white and he wore golden robes similar to the mace he'd gifted me. The most prominent feature of this god like being was his eyes. They were a fierce blue that while ageless and fathomless, held a warm kindness in their icy depths.

"I have faith you will bring light to those locked in darkness young cleric."

Peaceful sleep took me as he spoke the last words with calm certainty.

Let the games begin.

Comments

[grey mane]

you are a smart ass to begin with so...ya i can see why he is too...well done

[Pen Brush]

did any of the admins in chess game of the gods approve this story? you need 3 for approval to get the story in a folder

[Sage Quill]

Unfortunately, I read the forum but I still wasn't sure whether to just post it or if I had to message it to them. Any advise wold b appreciated.

[Pen Brush]

2162454
message it to them

[Sage Quill]

I hear, and I obey.

[lockpick]

God i wish one of my friends would play healer in DnD. I want to see where this goes next!

[BIGNICK]

Sounds interesting so far.

[Sage Quill]

The cover pic is pending my completion of the cover art, and it just seemed to fit. (even if his benefactor was an old man and not a gorgeous angel...*sigh* oh well.)

[Seraph973]

So I take it he is not going to be human. That kinda sucks.

[werewolf435]

kirin.. kirin... kirin.... why does that sound so familiar?

[DuskShadowx]

2577355 kirin is a dragon pony hybrid