When a high school boy is stuck with the responsibility of protecting a whole world, will he be able to pull it off, or will he flunk out on the world?
3356818 Check again. At the end of the first chapter, you spelled it wrong.
You really need an editor. There are several grammar errors and spelling errors scattered throughout the story. Example, spell out numbers that are under 100. "Have a good day you 2" is bad grammar.
Also, I've never heard of a .55 caliber pistol (beyond some old flintlocks), and I'm something of a gun nut. Only modern 55 cal I know of is the 8" gun used as a Navy cannon. A magnum sniper isn't an actual gun, same with an anti-tank rifle and combat shotgun (all are types of guns). The "Executioner" pistol is actually called the Judge, if you are talking about the revolver that fires shotgun shells. An ACOG can't be a hybrid sight, as a hybrid needs a CQC sight (ex: a red dot) with a magnifier (usually a 3X). If you are talking about a dual-sight (ex: a red dot on top of an ACOG), might want to fix that. Even then, you aren't going to attach those to a bolt-action sniper rifle, as they aren't very combat-effective (I'm ex-US Army). Incendiary was spelled wrong. Also, silencers are attachments to weapons, and a silencer for an M4A1 won't fit an Mk. 23, so what sizes were they?
i was until the last part kinda killed my buzz so to speak
Drama!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He is gonna be going crazy i wish i was in his place except for the kissing and oral stuff.
If this is the second chapter, then where's the first?
2858066 I'm sorry for the confusion, it's the first chapter but the second by the website's count. If that makes sense.
3356818
Check again. At the end of the first chapter, you spelled it wrong.
You really need an editor. There are several grammar errors and spelling errors scattered throughout the story. Example, spell out numbers that are under 100. "Have a good day you 2" is bad grammar.
Also, I've never heard of a .55 caliber pistol (beyond some old flintlocks), and I'm something of a gun nut. Only modern 55 cal I know of is the 8" gun used as a Navy cannon. A magnum sniper isn't an actual gun, same with an anti-tank rifle and combat shotgun (all are types of guns). The "Executioner" pistol is actually called the Judge, if you are talking about the revolver that fires shotgun shells. An ACOG can't be a hybrid sight, as a hybrid needs a CQC sight (ex: a red dot) with a magnifier (usually a 3X). If you are talking about a dual-sight (ex: a red dot on top of an ACOG), might want to fix that. Even then, you aren't going to attach those to a bolt-action sniper rifle, as they aren't very combat-effective (I'm ex-US Army). Incendiary was spelled wrong. Also, silencers are attachments to weapons, and a silencer for an M4A1 won't fit an Mk. 23, so what sizes were they?