How It Works

by Crazypurplebat

Chapter 3: Birds of a Feather

Chapter 3: Birds of a Feather

It was late afternoon as the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy rolled to a stop outside the small cafe. Flim collapsed on the couch affixed to the back of the machine, "You go on ahead brother," he said waving a hoof towards Flam. "I'll stay out here and," he paused for a moment thinking of an excuse, "Guard the cider."

Flam grumbled as he walked away from his brother and into the small business, "Probably for the best. He'll just mess it up again," he muttered. Flam had been on edge since leaving, or rather being chased, out of Ponyville earlier that day, and for the time being it was Flim who would be acting as the scapegoat to his frustration.

Flam opened the door and exited the dimming afternoon sunlight. He was instantly greeted by the smell of freshly ground coffee beans and an array of pastries just out of the oven, all being set down inside the glass display along the shop counter a young unicorn. Her coat was pale, almost cream in color, and her hair was striped with shades of green and tan, an array of freckles spattered across the young mare's cheeks and her golden eyes shone with what Flam recognized instantly as the vigor of a budding
entrepreneur. Setting down the last scone from her tray, she looked up at the newly arrived customer. "Hello there! How can I help you?" she asked warmly.

With a tip of his wide-brimmed hat Flam put on his game face. "Well, hello young lady. My name is Flam and I just happened to notice your fine establishment while on my way by," he drawled. "Do you buy chance serve beverages?"

"That's almost all I serve here," she replied. “Well, besides the odd pastry as you can see," she continued, gesturing to the display before her "My name is Vanilla Latte, but everypony calls me Vani. My shop specializes in beverages: teas, coffee, hot chocolate, smoothies, you name it we have it!" she cited quickly in a slightly flustered manner, as if remembering from a speech or business proposal repeated a hundred times.

"Well Miss Latte-"

"Vani please," the mare interrupted.

"Well Miss Vani," he continued, the 'miss' bringing a small frown to Vanilla's lips that did not go unnoticed by the young stallion. "I just so happen to be a salespony and I have quite the selection of ciders on hoof."

"Well I usually don't serve alcohol..."

"Not to worry, that's only a small part of what we have to offer, though I must say our sparkling cider is exquisite!"

"Well I would love to sample some," she smiled coming out from around the counter, "And I would be honored if you would sample some of my own creations. I have been looking to expand and a well-traveled salespony just as yourself could surely offer some great pointers!"

"Well I'll just go and grab some samples," he said with a short bow and retreated out the door. Flam lifted multiple bottles of cider from the shelves of the machine, glaring at his snoring brother as he returned to his sale.

"I'm back," he said setting down the bottles on the table. He then looked up to see Vanilla rushing back and forth behind the counter with steaming pots of water and various containers of spices and flavoring. Momentarily pausing to fill one of the small ceramic cups to the brim before moving onto the next.

"Wonderful," she looked up smiling. "I'm just about ready!"

Flam gave a weak smile, he was going to have to work for this sale.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Well thank you kindly for the purchase mam," Flam said with a final nod as he left the building. The moment he was out of eyesight he dropped his false grin and sighed loudly. The event had dragged on for hours, one drink after another as the mare droned on and on about her large array of beverages and the best way to serve them, and the best places to purchase flavorings, and how she was planning on expanding to include a few more cafes around Equestria. The same story he had heard a thousand times over from sales in the past. In the end his efforts had only resulted in half a dozen barrels of cider being sold.

Flam was exhausted. His eyes drooped as the day's events finally caught up with him. With a shuddering yawn he levitated a small package from the storage box on the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy and lowered it to the ground. Another shot of magic and the small rectangular shape expanded and unfolded into a large and comfortable tent. It was the Tip Top Tower Tent 2000 patent pending. Flam yawned once more and went inside the tent for a well deserved night's sleep, completely unaware that his brother was no longer dozing where he had left him.

As the early morning rays of sun touched the earth Flam was awakening inside the tent. Feeling much better with the events of the day before behind him, he straightened his attire and exited the tent. With a push of a small button it leaped a foot into the air and compacted back to its original form.

"Come on Brother, we must get an early start to the day. If we leave now we should make it to Fillydelphia by midday tomorrow," he called. When no reply came Flam stopped his preparations and looked around. "Flim!" he roared, but still there was no reply. He had disappeared and only one could guess where to. Flam flattened his ears and growled. Flam knew his brother well and he knew that Flim wasn't just going to return without his help, he'd be gone for days given the chance. Using his magic and the connection he had with his twin, Flam illuminated that trail that Flim had ventured out upon. With a direction to head and a firm frown upon his face he trotted off in search of his brother.

"Flim!" he shouted for the thousandth time, his voice was beginning to grow hoarse and his legs weary after traveling through thick forest undergrowth for nearly an hour. Flam guessed he had walked about two miles at this point and he had only grown angrier with each step. Burrs stuck to his fur, he had originally tried to remove them, but they were soon only to be replaced by another. His hooves were caked in layers of drying mud and a bird had been following him the entire time. At first the avian's song was soothing but now, as the sweat trickled into Flam's eyes, he found himself ready to strangle his trilling companion.

"Will. You. Shut. UP!" he thundered spinning to face the bird, a beam of lime green magic shot from his horn but it missed the creature who had settled on a branch. The bird ruffled its feathers and hopped from the branch to Flam's hat, and began to sing its song louder. The stallion screamed in frustration. "Flim, I swear to Celestia when I find you!!!!!"

Unbeknownst to him, only a few yards away, Flim was awakening from a deep slumber, disturbed by the sudden ruckus. He blinked the bleariness from his eyes and was greeted by the sounds of shouted threats and the occasional blast of magic that shot through the tree branches.

With a sigh, and the knowledge that his brother was nearby, Flim got to his hooves, dusted the specks of dirt from his collar, straightened his hat, and cleared his throat. "Over here brother," he called confidently as he trotted toward the site of the intensifying battle.

Flim entered a small clearing to find that the bird had called reinforcements. The improv flock had stolen Flam's hat and were now using it as a nest as they twittered and tweeted what Flam was sure to be insults. The mustachioed stallion retaliated by throwing insults and curses right back at the hat thieves.

"Having trouble brother?" asked Flim as he tried desperately to hide his amusement.

"Just where the hay have you been?!" his brother demanded spinning to face him.

"Oh don't get your tail in a twist," he replied. "You know what mother says, anger is not very becoming of you," he added with a wink, falling back into his usual charming routine. This only angered his brother further. "Besides we are in no rush, there is plenty of time, the sun is shining, the day beautiful, the birds singing..." He grinned.

Flam straightened to full height, took a deep breath, and silently counted to ten. "Better?" inquired Flim striding a step closer to his brother.

"No," he grumbled. "Now get your hooves in motion, we are a good two miles from the road and at least another mile from where I left the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000." With a zap of his horn he levitated his headwear from the branch and shook it violently until all the birds had vacated. After carefully inspecting the inside, he dusted the brim, and placed it upon his head. "You can tell me how you got into this mess on the way back," he snapped turning sharply and heading off in the direction he had come, now at a brisk pace.

"Ah well that, is an interesting story there brother," Flim began as he trotted to catch up. The sun shone through the leaves dappling the earth and turning Flim's coat a golden hue. "After you had gone into that quaint little cafe one of the mares that had been in Ponyville showed up. While we are on the subject of the cafe how many barrels did we sell?"

Flam ignored the question.

"Alrighty then. As I was saying, one of the mares showed up, the purple one, the one who helped the Apples. You remember her, yes?"

"Well of course I remember her! She's the one who cost us the competition! Honorary family my rump, and you," Flam said turning and poking his brother in the chest with his hoof, "You were the one who said it was alright!"

Flim took no notice of his brother's short temper, a skill he had acquired after many years with his younger twin. "Well it turns out she was quite enthralled by our machine, then again who isn't but that's neither here nor there, she seemed to be truly interested in the mechanics. Being the gentlepony that I am I invited her to discuss the relationship between the mechanical and magical aspects over a cup of cider."

Flim took another breath to continue his story, but Flam interjected. "You did what?!" he cried, his mustache bouncing with his sudden rage.

"Oh calm down brother," Flim soothed. "Its not like I gave her the blueprints in a sealed envelope, I just told her how the magic works together with the mechanics. Besides, I would be surprised if she remembered any of it."

"What do you mean by that," asked Flam raising an eyebrow.

"Why, I've never met a pony with such a low tolerance for cider. Ours truly isn't that strong! But a few glasses and she..." Flim trailed off, his eyes widening as memories of the night came back to him. The color drained from his face, but it was soon recolored as a blush crept across his face. His heart throbbed in his chest and butterflies had found their way to his gut.

"And?" asked Flam unaware of his brother's sudden discomfort.

"Oh," the stunned stallion replied as he shook the his head from side to side. He could have sworn that his mouth had been filled with cotton, and he licked his lips trying to relieve the fibrous feeling. "W....well," he started slowly recovering, a story rapidly developing in his mind. "The poor thing was so out of it, I decided to walk her part of the way home, she could barely tell which way was up let alone which direction she had come from." Flim was on a role now, the words coming easier. "Shortly after we left she started casting spells left and right. She, why she must have shot me with a teleportation spell. Yes, I'm sure that's what it was! Last thing I remember was my head hitting a tree branch, and then you finding me of course." Flim grinned and touched the back of his head tenderly for emphasis.

Flam glared at his elder brother suspiciously. "Fine," he decided and returned his gaze to the path ahead of him. They spent the rest of the morning in silence.

They arrived in Fillydelphia by mid-afternoon, the pale autumn sun still hanging high in the sky. Fillydelphia was much larger than the quaint town of Ponyville, though it was still a hoof smaller than Canterlot. Display stands, booths, and vendors lined the streets. Ponies shouted advertisements, drawing attention to their wares. Several stands sold their dwindling supplies of cider, yet the lines remained as long as ever. As the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy rolled onto the main street all eyes were drawn to the Flim Flam Brothers.

Flam elbowed his brother, jolting Flim from his reverie. Images of the purple mare swirled through his conscious, consuming his every thought. He shook his head trying to displace her from his mind, and stepped forward ready to perform their well choreographed number. Flim didn't know how he felt about her, numerous emotions battled for attention within his heart, none of them clear and all of them confusing. The one thing he did know was that she puzzled him.

Flim had an affinity for being able to pin down ponies. He could tell whether or not a pony would be an easy sell, he could identify their personality, and he knew how to play them. It was not a skill he had picked up as a sale's pony but a skill that made him a great sale's pony. But she, she was different. He knew she was intelligent, a loyal friend, and very determined, but there was so much more to her. Every time he thought he had figured her out, he would only find another piece to her puzzle amongst the memories of the night before. Flim had never experienced anything like this and it frustrated him, the purple mare, the intelligent unicorn, was unlike anypony he had ever met before.

The show went off without a hitch. Unlike in Ponyville, the ponies of Fillydelphia were used to multiple competitors in the apple business, and the brothers rapidly found themselves among the stands. Their jaunty sales pitch was quite unlike anything the other salesponies had to offer and had drawn them quite a large crowd. Their sales had quickly come to outshine their competition, who offered the brothers only a few stiff looks in congratulations. Their sales remained steady through the remainder of the day and at one point a merchant approached them, interested in buying the machine itself. The Brothers had turned him down, they still had a few miles to get out of the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy before selling her and moving on to their next big break. It had been a successful day, and by the time the sun had set they had made enough bits to compensate their failed excursion to Ponyville.

Despite the constant sales and frequent sale pitches that filled Flim's day, his mind had never really entered Fillydelphia. No matter what he did, or how hard he tried he could not exclude her from his thoughts. As the day had grown longer an idea had begun to form in the stallion's mind, growing stronger by the minute.

He was going to return to Ponyville, he had made up his mind and nothing would change it. He had to figure out who this pony was, he had to figure out what made her so different, what made her so important to him. It was the only way he could regain his focus, the only way he could get her out of his head...

As they shut down for the evening Flam stopped him. "What's been going on with you? You've been acting odd all day."

"Nothing," Flim replied shortly. "Figuring out a new sales pitch."

"Look, I accepted that little story you told me this morning," he said narrowing his eyes. "But I've had enough of this!"
"It wasn't a story," replied Flim meeting his brother's gaze.

"Look I've known you your entire life I can tell when you're lying. Now stop acting like a colt and tell me what is going on!"

"It's nothing!" he snapped, turning away from his brother.

"Tell me," Flam repeated not about to back down.

Flim sighed. Despite their differences, their constant arguments and bickering, Flam was his friend, his best friend and his brother. "That mare," he stated. "The purple unicorn. I... I just can't stop thinking about her, I can't figure her out and it's driving me mad! I just can't get her out of my head! Tell me did she make sense to you?"

"Yes, she was an arrogant know-it-all," he replied simply. "Not much else to her."

Flim shook his head. "No, there is more to her than that, I know there is."

Flam sighed and wrapped his foreleg around his brother's shoulder, showing a brief moment of brotherly love between the two. "Just forget about it Flim. It's not that big of a deal, we meet hundred's of ponies a day, no need to get all worked up over this one."

"Trust me brother I've been trying, but I just can't shake it...her." Flim slipped from beneath his brother's embrace and turned his eyes towards the sparkling night sky.

"Well just what do you propose we do then?"

"Return to Ponyville," the answer was immediate but Flim's voice was soft, the words barely inaudible.

Flam roared with laughter. "Well I'm not going back there! They'd run us out at first sight!"

Flim's ear flattened against his head. "Well you don't have to go back, but I do," he said frowning. "I'll go alone." His mind was made up, he had been pondering the idea since earlier, but saying it out loud had decided it for him.

"Flim, this isn't a good idea," Flam cautioned with all seriousness.

"No," the brother replied, straightening to full height. "It's probably not, but its my decision to make, not yours."

"I don't approve of this," Flam continued eager to talk his brother out of the doomed plan.

"Didn't think you would Flam." Flim patted his brother on the back and gave him a reassuring wink. "Don't you worry brother!" he called over his shoulder as he headed down the road, "I'll be back in no time!"

Flam sighed as his brother disappeared out of sight. "Stupid colt," he muttered under his breath.

"Wait!" Flim's voice echoed behind him as he had begun to head in for the night.

"What now Brother?" he sighed with a roll of his eyes.

"No money," he replied with a nervous chuckle. Throwing a well-packed saddlebag over his shoulder he ventured off into the night, this time for good.

Author's Note:

Finally! Seriously loved writing this chapter so much! ...I also seem to have a love for torturing Flam.

A couple notes on this that you guys should know.
1) Flim was quite intoxicated the night before as well, he just had better motor controls than Twilight, he in no way intentionally took advantage of her, both were very drunk and were not aware of the decisions they were making.
2) I think of the brothers as inventors and the tent would be similar to the one shown in Sleepless in Ponyville (The one Rarity used)
3) Why birds? Well why the hay not
4) I wanted to flesh out Flam a lot more as I think he will have a more important role in the rewrite as well as in the far future. I made Flim older because I think it was just another way to piss off Flam, the elder being the careless goofy one while the younger is more responsible (even if only by a few minutes age difference)

ATTENTION: If you are interested in having your OC appear in the story, please send me a note with a detailed description of your OC, both physical and personality (as well as special talent and occupation if they have one) and you may see them pop up in the background.

A special thanks to dmwcool1 and dusk-pegasus from DeviantArt, who have been helping with editing, rewriting, and just being generally awesome friends!

Coverart belongs to mn27 also on DeviantArt

Comments

[Crazypurplebat]

2426475

Is that good or bad...just indifferent? Haha I understand it is pretty unconventional and definitely a little known ship but I love it

[Crazypurplebat]

2426560

Oh no I can't give that away! It would ruin all sorts of fun surprises! *evil laugh* you'll just have to keep reading!

[alexanderhunt88]

2426578 Must. Continue . Reading.

[OkamiDash]

I can hardly wait for what has yet to come. Yosh! I have decided that I like it! Hence, DO NOT let the down votes affect the motivational appeal you got right here, this shipping... this story... the pure raw awesomeness and originality of this narrative is a must.

Please by all and any means necessary, do go on!~

[Crazypurplebat]

2434070 Oh thank you so much! That comment made my day. I love this ship it is my baby. Though the down votes do make me sad, I would never let it stop me from continuing, I've got a lot of people who read the original and I'll keep working on it for them, and for all the new fans who have found this story