Harry Potter, Knight of the moon

by The Walker

Griffin Trouble

Harry watched over the guard as they ran laps in the training area. To the naked eye nothing would seem different or give a reason they were all sweating. Harry had used his magic to make it so that everyone of the guards would have twenty five pounds spread over their bodies. He had them start running laps since early morning. Harry glanced at the sun and note it was almost noon.

“Alright everypony, you can take a thirty minute break for lunch. Before any of you ask, no I am not going to remove the extra weight. This is punishment as well as training.” The guard grumbled as they stopped running the laps and headed to the guard’s lounge for lunch. Harry merely smirked at their grumbling. While most of the guards could easily carry twenty five pounds, they weren’t normally expected to run laps with it or have it pressed on every part of their body. Harry looked over the courtyard.

“So this is where you are hiding.”

“I am not hiding Miss Dash, I am training the guards.” Harry glanced at the Pegasus as she walked up beside him. “Tell me Miss Dash, is there a reason you and the others are staying in Canterlot.” She looked at him.

“We’re waiting for the wedding to be rescheduled and are helping clean up a bit.” She stopped for a second in thought. “And stop calling me Miss Dash, I’m not Rarity.” Harry snorted at that statement. While he didn’t know the unicorn well, he had noted her rather unusually tendencies to act like a lady. A very exaggerated lady at that.

“Very well Rainbow Dash, as you wish.” Harry merely stood there in his armor enjoying the sunlight. He had learned to enjoy the sun when he could get it, though Nightmare Moon grumbled about it. He glanced at Rainbow Dash, who started to fidget in the silence.

“You know, we could……….” Harry didn’t get to hear what Rainbow Dash was going to suggest because at that moment, a griffin fell screeching from the sky, its claws lashing out at him. Faster than most would believe, Harry danced backwards from the attack, which only hit his armor and was repelled by the defensive spells on it. He dashed forward, bringing his hoof upward to smash into the griffin’s beak. His horn flared as he knocked its legs out from under it. He was about to bring his hoof down on the head of his downed opponent when he heard Rainbow Dash speak.

“Gilda?” Both Harry and the griffin stopped as they both turned to look at her. The griffin blinked as it took her in. When it spoke, its voice was female.

“Hey Dash, long time no see.” Rainbow Dash glared at Gilda.

“What are you doing here and why are you attacking Harry?” Gilda got to her feet. Harry let her because she seemed to know Rainbow Dash and he was confident he could take her down again. Gilda looked anywhere, but at Rainbow Dash.

“I’m here with my father.” Rainbow Dash blinked at this statement. She tilted her head in confusion.

“Why would your dad be here?” Gilda grumbled under her breath.

“He’s an ambassador okay. He goes to other countries for the king and makes treaties with them.” Rainbow Dash looked at her for a moment before bursting out into laughter. Harry looked at them in confusion.

“I don’t see why that’s a laughing matter Rainbow Dash.” Rainbow Dash’s laughter stopped as she looked at Harry.

“Back in flight school, Gilda told everyone that her father was a high ranking military official that won tons of battles.” Harry nodded he started to giggle at the difference between a military official and an ambassador.

“It’s not funny. He was a military official.” They looked at Gilda again. “He just became an ambassador after an injury to one of his legs.” She stuck her head up with a haughty look.

“That still doesn’t explain why you attacked Harry.” Gilda looked between Rainbow Dash and Harry before looking at the ground.

“He beat me in a fight.” Harry closed his eyes as he thought back over his two years of travel. He didn’t remember fighting this griffin, but he had fought a lot of them when he had been in their country. He opened his eyes as he remembered.

“I remember you now. You challenged me to a fight in that stupid ritual thing. I never did find out what that was about before leaving.” Gilda glared at him.

“You weren’t supposed to actually win that fight.” Harry raised an eyebrow at her. “It was a griffin marriage ritual you idiot. You were supposed to lose and for a griffin to win.” Harry’s face whitened.

“What exactly does this ritual supposed to do exactly?” Gilda’s glare seemed to burn into him.

“Thanks to you winning, we’re now betrothed.” Her claws dug into the ground. She stopped glaring at Harry as he started to hit himself in the face with a hoof.

“Why does this stuff always happen to me? What cruel god did I piss off to make him do this?” Harry continued to rant before suddenly pausing as a look of horror descended on his face. He got up and started to walk into the castle. Rainbow dash called out to him.

“Where are you going?” Harry glanced back at her.

“To write my will of course.” Rainbow Dash’s face took on a look of confusion.

“Why?” Harry stopped as looked back at her.

“Because Luna is clearly going to kill me for this, I just know it.” Harry’s face suddenly took on a look of hope. He turned to Gilda. “Where’s your father right now?” Gilda just stared at him before answering.

“In the throne room talking with Princess Celestia. Why?” Harry spun around.

“I might yet be able to stop this.” He ran off as he headed towards the throne room. Gilda and Rainbow Dash looked at each other before following him.

---

“I must say Princess Celestia, you accommodations is as good as ever.” Celestia stood with a Griffin who bad brown feathers and fur that was speckled with grey. His back left leg seemed to be twisted making him walk with a limp.

“It is a pleasure as always Ambassador Steelclaw. So the council that leads the griffins wants to rework our trade agreement?” Before Steelclaw could answer, the doors burst open and Harry strode into the room. They blinked at him. “I know you are a captain Harry, but that doesn’t give you the right to burst into the throne room.” Harry glanced at her before turning his focus on Steelclaw.

“Your Gilda’s father yes?” Steelclaw blinked before nodding at Harry. “What is this I hear about a marriage ritual?” Steelclaw straightened to his full height.

“I’m reasonably sure that I know what this is about. No, you can’t ask for my daughter’s claw in marriage unicorn, she is already betrothed to an earth pony.” Celestia looked between the two before realizing something. She started giggling. Steelclaw looked at Celestia in confusion.

“Ambassador Steelclaw, I am reasonably sure that Harry was the earth pony that defeated your daughter. He only became a unicorn recently.” Steelclaw looked confused by her statement before turning to Harry.

“I trust Princess Celestia, so I will believe her this once despite never having heard of this occurrence. What did you want to know about the ritual?”

“Is there any way to get out of it?” Steelclaw seemed to puff up as he looked at Harry.

“Do you have a problem with my daughter boy?” Harry merely stared at him wholly unintimidated by him.

“I have no problems with your daughter sir, I merely prefer not to die when Luna discovers it. Also because of this event, I am sure the universe is actively trying to make my life difficult.” Celestia burst out laughing at his last sentence. Steelclaw settled himself down as he looked at Harry.

“I am afraid that the only way to nullify the marriage ritual would be to defeat the champion of the arena back in the griffin homeland.” Harry looked at him for a few moments before turning to Celestia.

“Princess Celestia, I must inform you that I am taking time off to travel to the griffin homeland. I don’t know when I will return, but please let Luna know I will be gone.” Celestia stopped laughing as Harry walked out of the room to prepare for his trip moments before Gilda and Rainbow Dash enter. She looked at them and then thought of what Luna’s reaction to Harry’s predicament would be.

“This is going to be trouble, I can just tell.”

Author's Note:

Sometimes I feel bad for making Harry go through all of this. Does that mean I will stop? Of course I won't.

Comments

[moltendaniel]

this is gold...comedy gold. keep up the good and fucking hilarious story of "how the universe hates harry"....I think that's what the title should be. and don't get me wrong, I fucking love it.

[Dragonstorm]

thats all i can say about this chapter

[Monaki]

haha awesome! so funny~ This is heading in epic directions~

[Twilight_Shimmer]

Yeeeah, Harry is DEFINITELY Channeling ole Ranma Saotome . He now has 3 girls in his "harem" with a potential 4 if you count an obviously interested Twilight Sparkle.

[Philosophysics]

Gigolo Alert!

[Ray MorningLight]

“Why does this stuff always happen to me? What cruel god did I piss off to make him do this?” Harry continued to rant before suddenly pausing as a look of horror descended on his face. He got up and started to walk into the castle. Rainbow dash called out to him.

Ask the The Walker