Pinkie Pie is known for making cupcakes. All around town everypony tries to get a taste to those sweet cupcakes. Every ones in a while she will do an experiment like a new recipe. Her friends like her with her cooking, but not to play with. This is the story when she learns the truth
One summer evening on a sunny day in Ponyville, Pinkie Pie was making cupcakes but with a new recipe. This time it was a cupcake with frosting in the middle. Ones she was done she took the first bite and boy it was tasty.
"Hmm just some frosting and sprinkles on to and it will taste great," she said
After an hour she made the perfect cupcake. She wanted a friend to try it.
"Hey Twilight," she said
Twilight went inside the library and looked the door.
"Why did she lock the door?" asked Pinkie
Pinkie walks to the door and puts her ear on it. See hears Twilight, Rainbow, Rarity, Fluttershy, and Applejack.
"Pinkie Pie I think is of weird don't you think?" asked Rainbow
"I agree but where keeping this a secret from her right," said Applejack
"Yes we are totally keeping it a secret," said Twilight
"I don't think it a good idea to talk about her be hide her back right," said Fluttershy
"Too late I heard everything!" yelled Pinkie
"Oh no what do we do," said Rainbow
"I'll talk to her," said Twilight
Twilight walked outside to talk to Pinkie.
"Pinkie sometimes we need some time to talk in private," said Twilight
"You guys hate me," angered Pinkie
"Please where sorry," said Twilight
"If you guys hate me then I wish that I was died,"
Pinkie left without looking behind her. Later that night Pinkie was having flashbacks of the times she had with her friends. She cried herself to sleep. Then there was a voice calling her.
"Pinkie Pie," said the voice
"Who's there, show yourself" she said
"You don't want to be alive anymore do you?" the voice asked
"Yes, since no one likes me I don't want to live anymore," she said
"I can make it come true," The voice said
All of a sudden there was a magic surrounding her. It was covering her and lights flashed all around her.
"AAAAAAAAHHHHHH!" she yelled
This is fucking horrible, please go jump off a building into a pit of asps please
it love! it good story make, more plzzz
1534791
it wonder; i try harder but not so good like this
huh. I was hungry until I read this. I have now lost my appetite, and would instead like to vomit.
thank you sir, as i can likely save some money and lose some weight via this story. instead of lunch, I'll read a chapter here. rock on.
Ahem. Well.
Good story idea, but it was horribly executed, sorry to say.
While you didn't make the wall-of-text mistake a lot of authors make, there were a ton of grammatical errors, plus some small spelling errors. And punctuation.
On top of all of this, the plot was seriously rushed. I'd give an example, but all you need to do is read the first chapter.
I see some serious potential in this story to be great, but you really need to work on your writing skills.