Snowfall

by Golden Dragon

Snowfall Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Fresh-fallen snow
Erases the past
A blank slate
Written upon by those who pass by

Get up! The pegasus floated alone in an inky, black void. The thought seemed not his own.

“Huh?”

Move or you will die. The void vanished as white filled his vision, pain flaring in his right wing. His eyes snapped open at the sudden shock, his breathing quick and shallow. Thoughts were slow to come as the initial agony faded. He found himself lying in a snowdrift, his right wing pinned beneath him, throbbing in pain. He shifted his weight off the wing and stood, attempting to concentrate, to recall what had happened, but was immediately distracted by the frost forming on his muzzle with every breath. The chill air and frozen ground sapped what little warmth his battered body contained, numbing the pain, but momentary relief gave way to panic as the cold began to steal his other senses as well.

He glanced around in an attempt to gain his bearings. The sky was dark and clear, a lone cloud drifting slowly past the full moon, allowing its silvery glow to reflect off the snow and illuminate a small town with no more than a score of buildings lining its main thoroughfare. The air smelled faintly of woodsmoke, likely from the fires in hearths keeping ponies warm. The road was empty, the windows dark, but for a pale yellow glow in the uppermost window of a building carved out of a giant tree.

His only choice was to head towards the lone beacon before he succumbed to the chill night air or his injury, worry floating in the back of his mind that whomever lived there might not be able to help. He carefully made his way to the door and knocked, hoping that the pony inside was actually still awake. Voices floated down from inside, too muffled to make out the words, but gradually drawing closer. He breathed a sigh of relief as the door opened to reveal a baby purple and green dragon.

"What?" the dragon mumbled, managing to sound both sleepy and annoyed.

"Spike!" a voice from inside said. "Be nice. They must have a good reason for visiting at this hour." A purple filly walked up next to the dragon. "You do have a good reason, right?" she said, cocking an eyebrow.

The colt tried to speak, but the chattering of his teeth made forming words impossible. His entire body was shivering uncontrollably now. The cold had numbed his wing enough that it no longer hurt, but fatigue wracked his body.

"Oh my goodness," the filly said, noticing his condition. "Your wing looks awful! Come in, quickly! Spike, throw another log on the fire, and then go wake Nurse Redheart. And hurry!"

Spike grumbled some more. "I have to go outside in that cold? Dragons hate cold, Twilight." However, even as he said this he began bundling up.

"I know, Spike," Twilight smiled. "There will be a mug of hot cocoa waiting for you when you get back, with extra marshmallows, I promise." The baby dragon perked up at that, moving all the faster.

Vision blurred, thoughts muddled, the colt barely noticed the filly as she turned her attention back to him.

"Let's get you warmed up. Spike will be back soon with Nurse Redheart. She can take care of that wing for you." His body moved of its own accord as Twilight guided him to the fire and gently pushed him down. The warmth of the fire washed over him, pulling him into a deep and dreamless sleep.

* * *

The colt groaned as sunlight hit his eyelids. He began to stretch lazily, yawning, until a stab of pain brought memories of last night flooding back. He panicked momentarily before realizing he lay in a bed, wing set and splinted. Slowly, he stumbled out of the bed, taking stock of his surroundings. The bed sat in a loft next to a window in a room filled with shelves of books, their musty smell permeating the air. He opened the lone door to reveal stairs leading down to the ground level of the building. Bookshelves lined every wall of the sprawling room below, reaching all the way to the ceiling. Strewn about the floor and tables were haphazard stacks of books, somehow not collapsing despite their unstable appearance. The purple unicorn from last night was sitting by the fire, a book open in front of her. She looked up as he came down the stairs.

"You're awake! Are you feeling better?" She sounded worried. She hurried over to him, accidentally kicking her book away in the process.

"I think so," he said. "Thank you for helping me miss . . . Twilight was it?"

She held out a hoof. "Twilight Sparkle. And it was no problem, I'm always willing to help a pony in need. Nurse Redheart did most of the work anyway."

He started to lift his hoof to introduce himself. "I'm . . . ," he paused, putting his hoof back down. "I . . . ," he searched his thoughts. He remembered waking up in the snow, finding this house, getting help from Twilight Sparkle. He frowned, concentrating. Confusion gave way to fear as nothing came to him, no name, no memories before last night, nothing!

“Are you sure you’re all right?”

He shook his head. “I can’t remember anything from before last night. It’s just . . . blank.” His thoughts raced. What happened to me?

Twilight’s eyes darted to his flank. “That . . . might explain something Nurse Redheart and I were wondering about last night.” She pointed at his flank. “You don’t have a cutie mark. I’ve never heard of an adult without one. Perhaps if you forget your talent you lose its mark.”

He looked, and sure enough, there was nothing there -- no clue as to who he might be. Slowly, he walked over to the mirror hanging on the wall and examined the reflection -- a colt with a white coat and light gray close-cut mane. Ice blue eyes stared back from a face that was wholly unfamiliar. The effect was unnerving, to say the least, and he quickly turned away.

“I’ve read about this before,” Twilight said, scanning the shelves of books. Her horn glowed faintly as she found the one she sought, her magic carrying it through the air to the nearby table. Twilight kept talking as she read from the pages, her eyes quickly darting back and forth. “It’s called amnesia . . . “

The pegasus only half listened, his situation at the forefront of his mind as Twilight read aloud from the thick tome. Why was I outside on such a cold night? Why can’t I remember anything? He snapped out of the unpleasant thoughts when he realized that the filly was no longer reading from the book.

“ . . . but I can’t find any record of a pony having complete amnesia. I’ll keep researching. In the meantime, you need a name. I have to call you something and it might help you feel better.”

A name? He walked over to the window, examining the wintry landscape it revealed -- everything was covered with a fresh coat of snow that sparkled in the morning sun; a few errant snowflakes danced in a light breeze. The snow is where I woke up last night; with nothing before that, I may as well have been born there. “Call me Snowfall.”

“Snowfall,” Twilight nodded. “It’s good to meet you, Snowfall.” Twilight again held out her hoof to him. This time, he held out his own hoof and shook hers, smiling

As Twilight said the name it felt right to him; it filled a corner of the void in his mind -- a lone light shining in the darkness. His thoughts, however, invariably drifted to that emptyness, filling him with worry. What if his memories did not return? Could he lead a normal life having had no parents, no childhood, no experiences to draw from? He did not have any answers.

Snowfall’s thoughts were interrupted when the front door crashed open, in tumbling a blue pegasus with a rainbow mane and tail. The sight of her picking herself up and dusting off tickled something in the back of his mind. Not quite a memory, more a shadow of an echo, indistinct yet compelling familiar. Her. Do I know her? Snowfall didn’t realize he had been staring until a blue hoof waved in front of his eyes.

“Hello? Anypony in there?” the blue filly asked, her eyes meeting his.

The colt snapped back to reality. “Oh, I’m sorry, it’s just . . . I thought . . . never mind.” How could I explain? ‘I almost remember you?’ She’ll think I’m nuts.

“Where’d you find this guy, Twilight? He’s even weirder than you are!” The blue filly grinned.

“Rainbow Dash, this is no time for jokes. This is Snowfall, he showed up on my doorstep in the middle of the night with a broken wing and no memory. I’m researching to see if there is anything we can do to help him.” Twilight turned to Snowfall. “Don’t mind Rainbow Dash. She means well, she can be a bit tactless.”

Rainbow Dash’s smile slid off her face; she looked back at Snowfall, her eyes wide. “Oh, I didn’t know.”

“It’s okay, Dash. Now, could you show Snowfall around Ponyville, please? He needs to go see Nurse Redheart, too. She wanted to check up on him at some point today. Snowfall, you can wear my scarf while you are out.” Twilight turned back to the book she was reading, quickly becoming lost in thought again.

Dash motioned with her head towards the door. “Let’s go. She likes peace and quiet when she buries her head in those books.”

Snowfall followed Rainbow Dash out into the crisp winter morning -- downright pleasant compared to the bitter cold he had felt last night. He breathed in deeply, his nostrils flaring as they took in the smells of the town -- woodsmoke, fresh-fallen snow, pine trees. Around him, many ponies busied themselves with the tasks that kept the town running day-to-day such as clearing snow off the walkways and hauling food out of storage in preparations for lunch. Foals galloped through the snow drifts, giggling, not a care in their minds aside from how they should spend their afternoon.

“A broken wing, huh? That must suck,” Rainbow Dash said as they slowly walked through town towards Nurse Redheart’s place.

Snowfall glanced at his splinted wing. “I guess,” he shrugged.

“What do you mean, you guess?” Dash gave her wings a flap. “Flying’s great!”

“It’ll heal. I’m more worried about my mind.”

Dash folded her wings back. “Oh, right, your memories. Well, Twilight’s the smartest pony I know. She’ll figure something out.” She nodded as if that were the end of that.

“Yeah,” Snowfall mumbled. I hope so.

They arrived at Nurse Redheart’s infirmary, a small building with a red cross and hearts on its door. Rainbow Dash opted to wait outside as Snowfall went it. The nurse carefully examined his wing and, at the mention of his memory loss, his head as well.

“Have you experienced any headaches, nausea, or blurred vision?” she asked.

Snowfall shook his head. “Aside from the amnesia my head feels fine.”

“Well Snowfall, I don’t know what caused your amnesia, but on the plus side your wing injury isn’t very severe. The splint should be able to come off in a couple weeks and you will be as good as new! You’re a lucky pony,” she smiled at him. “Just try not to overexert yourself; you should rest.”

Snowfall left the nurse’s building in a daze. How am I lucky? I don’t know who I am. If anything, his visit had just raised more questions. He would have welcomed any explanation for his amnesia. Anything, any clue as to what had happened to him, how he had ended up outside in the middle of a winter night, would have been better than not knowing at all. He sighed.

“Bad news?” Rainbow Dash asked upon seeing his gloomy face.

“She doesn’t know what caused my amnesia.” Frustration rose in his voice. “I just . . . what should I do Rainbow Dash?”

“You’re asking me? I usually just let Twilight figure out hard stuff like that. Now come on, I’m supposed to be showing you around Ponyville.”

The first stop on their tour was a nearby boutique. “Just a moment,” a melodic voice called out from the back room when they entered. A white unicorn with a flowing purple mane appeared in the back doorway. Her face lit up with a smile as seeing Rainbow Dash. “Rainbow Dash! Well this is a pleasant surprise. And who is this dashing young colt with you? An acquaintance from flight school?”

Snowfall blushed at the compliment.

“No, I just met him today,” Dash replied. “Rarity, this is Snowfall. He showed up in the middle of the night at Twilight’s doorstep, and he doesn’t know who he is!”

“Rainbow Dash,” a hint of annoyance crept into Rarity’s voice. “If this is another one of your pranks, you should -- “

“It’s not a joke,” Snowfall interrupted. “I really don’t remember anything before last night.” Snowfall understood how the unicorn would think it was a joke, but it still pained him to hear it.

“Oh darling, I’m so sorry,” her face twisted into an expression of pity for a moment before breaking out into a grin. “Ah, I know just the thing. I shall make you a scarf. It can get cold in the winter and we can’t have you wearing somepony else’s scarf. No no no, a scarf must be designed to accentuate the pony who wears it.”

“But I have no way to pay you,” Snowfall protested.

“That’s quite alright, my dear. It’s on the house.”

“I don’t want to be a bother.” Snowfall couldn’t understand why she was being so nice to a pony that she had just met. He had done nothing to deserve such generosity. He couldn’t explain it, but something about it didn’t sit right with him. For some reason a vague sense of mistrust rose up within him. The feeling was as faint as the familiarity he felt when he looked at Rainbow Dash, indistinct yet there all the same. He did his best to suppress it, to humor the filly, but surely, he thought, the feeling had to be there for a reason.

“It’s no bother at all, darling. It’s what I enjoy doing!” Rarity smiled, already busying herself gathering the materials needed for her project. “Ah, this blue will go marvelously with your eyes!”

Snowfall could do little but sit there, lost in thought, as Rarity set to work. He had been awake for mere hours, but the events of the day had already sent him reeling. Amnesia, a pony that seemed familiar, a feeling of mistrust -- it was a lot to take in.

Snowfall stared at his reflection in the mirror. Rarity had fussed over him for a few hours, ensuring the scarf she was making would be just right for him. He still didn’t truly grasp that the unfamiliar colt reflected back was him, although he was starting to grow accustomed to the image. He felt uncomfortable accepting the gift from the unicorn, but he couldn’t help but admit she had done some fine work. The scarf was a deep shade of blue, the color of dusk, peppered with snowflakes that, at first glance, seemed arbitrary in their placement, but closer inspection revealed an intricate pattern.

“Well, Snowfall, what do you think?” Rarity asked. She looked at him, her large blue eyes seeking confirmation that she had done a good job.

“It’s lovely, Rarity. Thank you.” He couldn’t help but smile. He couldn’t explain it, but he did feel better, if only a little bit. He heard the filly breathe a sigh of relief at his praise.

As he and Rainbow Dash made their way to their next destination, Snowfall felt an itch on the back of his neck, as if he were being watched. He turned his gaze to the shadows of a nearby alley to see a dirt colored pegasus staring at him from the shadows. He turned back towards Dash. “Who’s he?” He asked, motioning towards the alley.

“Who?”

Snowfall turned back towards the alley, but the pegasus was gone. “Somepony was standing there, staring at me. A brown pegasus.”

Dash shrugged. “I dunno. He’s gone now, though.”

Snowfall trotted over to the alley and peered down it, but there was no sign of the pegasus. He had the feeling that the pegasus knew something about him. Again he felt mistrust rising up. Somepony watching him, vanishing when he was noticed; could Dash be lying?

“You comin’?” Dash shouted back at him.

Snowfall sighed, trotting back to Dash. He would have to find that pegasus when he had the chance. Next, they made their way to a cottage on the edge of a large forest where a soft-spoken yellow pegasus lived. It seemed strange to him that a pony would live so far away from other ponies. He didn’t like it.

“You live all the way out here by yourself, Fluttershy?” Snowfall asked her.

Flutterhy nodded. “I love taking care of the animals. It’s easier to do that out here.” The kind way in which she spoke showed that the animals meant a great deal to her. As they talked, Fluttershy busied herself attending to the woodland creatures in her cottage, speaking soothingly to each one. Flutterhy offered to look at his injured wing, but Snowfall politely declined, explaining that Nurse Redheart had taken care of it, which seemed to satisfy the pegasus.

Her reasoning made sense to him, yet he couldn’t shake the feeling he had, no matter how nice she had seemed. He wanted to trust the ponies he had met, truly he did, yet try as he might, part of him resisted. With the sun setting, he parted ways with Dash, who promised to finish the tour tomorrow. Snowfall wandered the town until the sun sank below the horizon, searching for the pegasus, for answers, but he found neither.

The events of the day left Snowfall drained. Awakening to a life he did not know, surrounded by ponies who did know their lives, how they fit in, was stressful. His interactions with them had been pleasant enough when he could suppress the strange feeling of unease he had, but he couldn’t help but think about what was missing within him. Then there was that pegasus who was watching him. Who was he? What did he know? Upon returning to Twilight’s house, he spoke to her only long enough to learn that she had no progress to report. Sleep was slow to come that night, and when it did his dreams offered little solace.

* * *

Rainbow Dash met him outside the next morning to continue his tour. She first took him to an apple orchard on the outskirts of town. In the large barn she introduced him to an orange pony named Applejack, who was fretting over a section of sagging roof. His stomach growled as the smell of apples wafted by.

Applejack smiled. “I was about to have breakfast myself. Come on, you ain’t eaten ‘til you’ve tried some of my apple fritters!” She nodded as if there was no way he could refuse.

Snowfall considered politely declining, but if his interactions with Rarity the day before were any indication, this filly would not take no for an answer either. He was glad he did accept her offer, as the delicious food warmed his belly. As with Rarity, it did raise his spirits somewhat. His stomach full, he thanked Applejack.

She shook his hoof in farewell saying, “It was nice meetin’ ya Snowfall. Stop by and visit any time! I’m usually busy somewhere on the farm, but I can always spare some time for a friend.”

A friend? They barely knew each other and yet this pony considered him her friend? Snowfall wasn’t sure what to make of this. He forced a smile and nodded. Snowfall knew the tour was supposed to raise his spirits, to get him settled in to what could very well be his new life in Ponyville, but it wasn’t what he wanted. He wanted his life back, whatever it was.

Their final stop turned out to be a confectionery called Sugar Cube Corner. Rainbow Dash stopped Snowfall with a hoof across his chest. “Before we go in, you should know that Pinkie Pie can be a little . . . energetic.” With that, they entered the building. Before long a pink pony with a mane that looked like a mass of cotton candy noticed them and bounded over.

“Hi Dash! Who’s this? I’ve never seen him before. Is he new in town? Oh, and he’s hurt! And he isn’t smiling, Dash. Ooh! I know what will make him feel better. A PARTY!” With this Pinkie Pie leapt onto her hind legs, throwing confetti into the air.

Even with Dash’s forewarning, Snowfall was taken aback at the boisterousness of the pink filly. “My . . . my name is Snowfall.”

“Hi Snowfall. It’s nice to meet you. I’m Pinkie Pie. I love meeting new ponies, don’t you? They are so much fun to meet and a party is the best place to meet them. Everypony enjoys a party and you look like you could use a party. You’ll make so many new friends you’ll just want to smile, because if I see a sad pony that makes me sad too, and I don’t want to be sad. Do you?” Pinkie Pie’s grin slipped momentarily, returning moments later.

“I do want to be happy. I’m just . . . not sure a party will do the trick.” A party for me just because I don’t feel like smiling?

“Sure it will, silly,” Pinkie Pie said, apparently not noticing the doubt Snowfall felt. “We’ll have a party for you tomorrow. You’ll see, it will make you happy again.” Pinkie Pie bounded off, already busy with preparations.

The tour was over and Snowfall parted ways with Dash. His time spent with her the past two days had been pleasant enough. He felt comfortable around her, as if somehow things could be right in the world again. He did not get the strange feelings of mistrust with her like he did with the other ponies he had met. He walked slowly back to Twilight’s house, taking in the sights of the town. Movement on the edge of his vision caught his attention. He turned to see the colt from yesterday again staring at him from the shadows between two buildings. The colt smiled, turning around and trotting away.

“Hey,” he shouted at the retreating colt. He galloped to the alley entrance to see the colt disappearing behind one of the buildings. Snowfall gave chase, rounding the building in time to see the colt spare one last glance back at him before leaping into the air and flying off towards the forest. “Wait!” Snowfall nearly tried to fly after the colt before remembering his injured wing. He grumbled, returning to his wanderings through town, alone with his thoughts, until the sun began to set.

* * *

For the next few days Snowfall was left to his own devices. Twilight was always engrossed in her books and Rainbow Dash had her own work to do, so he had little else to do but wander around town. Perhaps, he thought, if he helped the ponies around town, he might rediscover what he was good at -- find out who he was. He offered help to them, asking for any work to keep him occupied. The mistrust tugged at him no matter what he tried, yet he did his best to ignore it.

As he worked, his thoughts turned inward. He had nothing to keep his mind occupied except for thoughts of his past. His encounters with the ponies on the tour floated through his mind. Rarity, Fluttershy, Applejack, Pinkie Pie, they all knew who they were, how they fit in to life here in Ponyville. Would he ever know the same? He could only hope. The thoughts did nothing to help his mood, a sense of malaise took root within him. Yet he kept working. It was the only thing he could do. Sitting still would just make things worse. The work itself felt good, at least. Snowfall hadn’t realized while simply walking around town just how strong his body was. He easily hauled loads twice as heavy as those of the other ponies, and he didn’t feel fatigued from it at all. In this respect, he felt some manner of contentment as he worked, more than he had felt when Rarity made him the scarf or when Applejack shared her breakfast. Although the exertion gave his muscles a pleasant ache, his emotions had only only gotten worse as the days went on; he was no closer to figuring out who he was.

One afternoon, as he worked under a drab gray sky that hinted at snow that was not forthcoming, Rainbow Dash landed in front of him. “There you are! I’ve been looking all over for you. It’s time for your party!” She motioned with her head as she turned around, walking towards Sugar Cube Corner. Snowfall followed, unsure if the party would really help. At least I’ll be near Rainbow Dash. He hadn’t realized how much of a difference being with her made until she showed up.

Sugar Cube Corner was packed with ponies. Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Rarity, Twilight Sparkle, Fluttershy, and of course Rainbow Dash, along with many other ponies that Snowfall had not yet met, all smiling and shouting their hellos when they saw him enter. Streamers of every color hung from the walls; balloons floated around the room; the air was thick with the smell of sugary treats; cheerful music played, audible even over all the laughter and talking of the party-goers; colorfully wrapped presents with tags indicating that they were for him were piled on a table. Presents! Snowfall had not expected such an outpouring of love -- love that he felt he had not earned. Everypony here looks so happy, I’d just ruin the mood. Snowfall felt tears welling up in his eyes.

“Are you okay?” Rainbow Dash looked concerned, stepping towards him.

“No . . . ,” Snowfall said weakly before galloping back out the door past startled ponies. He thought he heard Rainbow Dash shout something behind him, but he couldn’t make it out. Tears streamed down his face as he ran. When he finally stopped, too tired to run any more, he was outside of the town, just inside a small copse of trees. He sat down, head slumped forward, tears leaking from his eyes. Why me? Why can’t I have a normal life like everypony else?

“Wow, you’re pretty fast for a pony with a broken wing!” Rainbow Dash floated down in front of him. Rarity, Twilight, Pinkie, Fluttershy, and Applejack were close behind. “Now, you wanna tell me what that was all about?”

Snowfall looked up at Rainbow Dash, his tears subsiding. “Everypony has been so nice to me, but what have I done to deserve such kindness? I’m a stranger to everypony, including myself. I’m empty inside, Rainbow Dash. Seeing all those other ponies, full of happiness and purpose . . . what’s my purpose? What cause do I have to be happy? For all I know my memories may never return and I’ll always be empty. Memories of my friends, my family, my childhood . . . all gone. I can’t bear to think of it.” He lowered his head, ears drooping down.

Rainbow Dash brushed a tear off Snowfall’s cheek with her hoof. “Hey hey hey. Don’t talk like that. Twilight is the smartest pony I know. If anypony can find a way to help you, she can. But until then, we’ll just have to work on getting you some new memories. Awesome ones!” She gave Snowfall a playful hoof to the shoulder and smiled.

Rarity chimed in, “Darling, you haven’t done anything to not deserve our kindness. It doesn’t matter to us who you are, we love you all the same.” The others all spoke up, affirming what Rarity had said.

Snowfall nodded and got up, drying his eyes of the tears that remained. He still felt that connection to Rainbow Dash, and her words comforted him, more so than the words of the other ponies. Seeing Rainbow Dash smiling at him warmed his heart. She’s right. Dwelling on a past I cannot remember doesn’t help anything. I need to find my place here and now. I’ll find my purpose.