• Published 1st Aug 2022
  • 4,397 Views, 440 Comments

Why not? Sure. I'll Marry You. - HAKDurbin



When princess and pop singer Pipp Petals discovered her fiancée has been cheating on her moments before their wedding, she decided to marry Sheriff Hitch who is holding a "Marry Me" sign in the crowd.

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Chapter 9

The following morning, Hitch dropped by the Z-Heights store on the way to the sheriff's station. There, Peach Melba taught him that there were apps that drain a phone's battery more than others, such as Amplify and making video calls. Thus, Hitch brought his charger to work so that he wouldn't drain his phone's battery from listening to Pipp's music while working in case Pipp wanted to video call after work.

As the week passed, Hitch continued encountering ponies who had questions regarding him and Pipp. It became a routine to answer questions regarding the wedding, Presto, whether Hitch would live with Pipp in Zephyr Heights or her moving to Maretime Bay every time Hitch was on patrol. To Hitch's relief, the questions died down on Thursday as the community acknowledged Hitch's explanations of what happened at Zephyr Heights Castle and where things were going between him and Pipp. Periwinkle appreciated Hitch not revealing her as the pony behind the "Marry Me" sign. But while she was happy that Hitch was giving his marriage a chance, many other mares, such as Mayflower, Dahlia, Mountain Frost, and Peach Melba, didn't look or speak to Hitch with the sparkle in their eyes that they once had.

Come Friday, two weeks after the wedding, Hitch went to work with Pipp in mind. The last time Pipp called him, she announced she was visiting and expected to arrive sometime that day, but she didn't know when exactly. Hitch kept Pipp's visit a secret from everypony but Sunny, wanting to avoid any more excitement all over town. At noon, Hitch went to grab lunch while Sprout stayed in the sheriff's station ordering pizza. Hitch walked to Sunny's smoothie stand and got in line for a drink before grabbing his lunch at a nearby sandwich stand. Hitch hummed to Pipp's songs as he waited in line. When Hitch reached the front of the line, Sunny looked at him with a professional smile, but Hitch saw in her eyes that she was excited.

"Morning, Sheriff Hitch," Sunny greeted. "The usual blueberry plum swirl?"

"You bet," Hitch replied.

"Coming right up," Sunny said.

Sunny went to the back of the stand and began working on Hitch's order. Hitch went back to humming and tapped his front left hoof while he waited. When Sunny finished, Hitch reached into his satchel to take out money to pay for the smoothie. However, as Hitch dug into his satchel, Sunny looked around to make sure nopony else was around and smirked before leaning toward Hitch and holding her hoof up to hide her mouth.

"Psst. Hey, Hitch, any idea how soon Pipp will be here?" she whispered.

Hitch rolled his eyes, thinking he should have suspected Sunny would ask.

"No idea. She hasn't texted me since she left Zephyr Heights because there's no reception between Zephyr Heights and Maretime Bay," Hitch said.

"That's a shame. Are you hoping she comes soon?" Sunny asked.

Hitch looked away from Sunny, hesitant to answer.

"Yyyyyyeeesss, and no," he said.

"No? What do you mean, 'no?' Aren't you looking forward to her coming to see you?" Sunny asked.

"Sure, I am, but I'd like the princess to arrive when I'm off duty, so I have time to show her around town," Hitch said before adding while scratching his front leg, "Also, the later she comes, the higher the chance of ponies not going, well, ballistic."

Sunny gave Hitch an unamused frown and asked, "Seriously, Hitch? That's your biggest concern?"

"Well, what do you expect? If I told anypony she's coming apart from you, the whole town would want to set a parade or something in her honor when she's only here to see me," Hitch said.

"Hitch, you're married to the most beloved pony in all of Equestria. Everypony is going to lose it whether you tell them ahead of time or not," Sunny said. "Besides, what do you plan to do if Pipp does come when you're done with work? Show her around town in the middle of the night while everypony is asleep and then call it a day? I doubt she's coming all the way here just for that."

"No, you're right. She wouldn't," Hitch said with a sigh. "I just want to make time where it's just the two of us so we can find out whether or not we should stay married."

Sunny smiled warmly and said, "I understand, but her appearance will cause a lot of attention whenever she comes here. You probably will too whenever you visit her at Zephyr Heights. Queen Haven and Zipp never said anything about you and Pipp getting to know each other privately all the time."

"If that's the case, then maybe the princess and I should figure out how to spend time with less attention apart from calling or texting each other," Hitch said. "Otherwise, I should expect every visit to be her popping up and somepony saying -"

"IT'S PIPP!"

Hitch turned to find a horde of ponies running past him and Sunny, screaming joyfully. Hitch and Sunny looked ahead to find Pipp walking down the streets with Thunder and Zoom walking beside her and Zipp following. Zoom and Thunder stepped in front of Pipp and lifted their wings to keep ponies back as the citizens cheered and took pictures with their phones. One shopkeeper took a bouquet from his shop and ran over to offer them to Pipp. Pip smiled sweetly and reached over Zoom and Thunder's wings to take the flowers as she thanked the ponies for their enthusiastic welcome.

Hitch huffed and gave Sunny a look that said," You see what I mean?" He marched over to the crowd, with Sunny getting out of her stand to follow. Pipp noticed them coming from the corner of her eye and her smile brightened as she turned to Hitch and waved to him. Hitch's heart skipped a beat, but the moment was quickly dashed when he noticed Zipp looking at him over Pipp's shoulder. She was giving Hitch and Sunny a friendly smile, but deep in her cyan eyes Hitch could see that she was going to watch him very closely. Hitch gulped to hide any hint of fear and put on a professional face as he pushed through the crowd.

"All right, everypony, break it up," he ordered.

The ponies who noticed Hitch coming backed away, all too happy to give him room to come over to his wife. Zoom and Thunder lowered their wings to allow Hitch to pass, and Pipp's smile grew as Hitch stopped in front of her.

"H-hi," Hitch said while scratching the back of his head.

"Hi," Pipp said, moving her mane back.

The crowd "awww" ed, finding their awkward greeting adorable. Then Izzy pushed her way to the front of the crowd and shouted, "Kiss her, Hitch!"

"Yeah, kiss her!" A stallion agreed.

Before Hitch and Pipp knew it, the crowd was exclaiming words of agreement and telling them to kiss. Hitch and Pipp looked away from each other bashfully, with Hitch still rubbing the back of his head as their cheeks turned pink. They then faced each other, and Hitch awkwardly leaned his head toward Pipp. Pipp chuckled with her mouth closed, finding Hitch's attempts to make the first move cute, and leaned in for a peck on the lips. They looked away from each other again with their cheeks turning cherry red, and ponies cheered while some took videos of the kiss.

"All right, everypony, let's leave Hitch and Pipp alone,'' Sunny said, stepping between Hitch and Pipp and the crowd. "Pipp came all the way from Zephyr Heights to spend time with Hitch, so let's leave them be."

Some of the ponies "aww" ed in disappointment but reluctantly agreed. Thus, the crowd dispersed, leaving only Hitch, Pipp, Zipp, Sunny, Izzy, Zoom, and Thunder left. Hitch and Pipp continued to look away from each other, with Hitch giving Sunny a thankful look. After half a minute, Hitch cleared his throat and turned to Pipp, still not looking at her.

"So… how is your trip?" Hitch asked.

Pipp turned back to Hitch and said, "It was a nightmare not being able to use Bestie, but Zipp was here to keep me company, so I managed."

"Yeah, Zipp. You didn't mention you were bringing your sister with you," Hitch said.

“That's because I'm a last-minute addition," Zipp said. "When Pipp told me she was coming to visit you, I thought it would be nice to visit Maretime Bay myself. After all, I've never been outside of Zephyr Heights either, so why not fix that when my sister comes to visit you?"

"Well, you are both welcome to come and visit our home, Zipp," Sunny said.

"Yeah, the more princesses the better," Izzy said.

"Thanks, you two," Pipp said. "Now, I hope our arrival wasn't disrupting your patrol, Hitch."

"Oh, no. Not at all," Hitch assured. "In fact, I was about to grab some lunch."

Sunny gasped and said, "Hitch, your smoothie is still on the counter."

Pipp and Zipp's eyes widened, and the former said, "Oh, my glitter, lunch with a smoothie sounds so wonderful. We haven't eaten lunch either, and after so much walking, a smoothie sounds wonderful. I'm so thirsty I could chug an entire smoothie in 10 seconds."

"Ha! That's cute, Sis. I could chug an entire smoothie in less than 10 seconds," Zipp said.

Hitch laughed and said, "That's nice, Your Highnesses, but it just so happens I hold the record for drinking an entire, large smoothie the fastest."

"Oh, is that a fact?" Zipp asked with a smirk. "In that case why don't you prove that with a little competition? If either I or Pipp beat you, you have to pay for both of our drinks."

"You're on," Hitch said. "Don't say I didn't warn you about going against a champion."

"Hee hee. In-laws smack talking. This is going to be fun," Izzy said.

"Alright then, everypony, follow me to my stand," Sunny said.

Hitch, Pipp, Zipp, Izzy, Zoom, and Thunder followed Sunny, with Pipp walking beside Hitch. Sunny went back inside her stand and held out Hitch's smoothie to him until she gasped and pulled back.

"Wait a minute. This smoothie has probably melted a little after being left alone to welcome Pipp and Zipp," she said. "I'll make another smoothie so that you all have fresh smoothies to keep it fair."

"Fine with me. It won't help the princesses," Hitch said.

"Oh, ho! I'm gonna make you eat those words, Sheriff," Zipp said. "Anyway, I'll take a strawberry and raspberry mix, Sunny."

"An orange and kiwi smoothie would be fabulous," Pipp said, singing the last word.

"Coming right up," Sunny said. "Who wants Hitch's old smoothie?"

"Oooo. Me! Me! Me!" Thunder exclaimed, waving his hoof.

With a chuckle, Sunny gave Thunder the smoothie and began working on the other three smoothies. As they waited for their drinks, Hitch and Zipp gave each other competitive smirks that made Izzy giggle and Pipp smile in amusement. When Sunny finished, she handed Hitch, Pipp, and Zipp their smoothies and then took out a timer. She paused for a few seconds to build up the suspense.

"On your marks…get set…GO!" Sunny exclaimed.

Immediately, Hitch, Pipp, and Sunny began wolfing down their smoothies. Hitch and Zipp continued glancing at each other, trying to intimidate the other by showing off how fast they were drinking. Izzy, Zoom, and Thunder watched Hitch and Zipp closely as they consumed three-quarters of their smoothies. Eventually, Hitch grew closer to finishing first, exciting everypony until they heard Pipp slamming her cup on the counter.

"Totally done!" She boasted with a hiccup.

Izzy, Zoom, and Thunder looked at the younger princess, shocked, while Sunny stopped her timer. Hitch finished his smoothie six seconds later, and Zipp finished last three seconds after Hitch. Hitch and Zipp panted before turning to Pipp, astonished to see her victorious.

"7.1 seconds. We have a new Gulpathon record!" Sunny announced. "Princess Pipp Trailblazer is our new champion!"

Sunny, Izzy, Zoom, and Thunder cheered while Pipp gave Hitch and Zipp a smug look. Hitch started back, stunned that he had been beaten and that Pipp finished her drink in less than 10 seconds. Pipp gestured to Hitch with her head to pay up, and Hitch sighed as he paid Sunny for Pipp and Zipp's smoothies. Zipp gave her sister a hoof bump, then turned to Hitch.

"Gotta admit, Sheriff, I'm impressed," she said. "I consider myself pretty fast when I want to be, and it usually leads to me winning a lot of contests back at home. So, as baffled as I am that Pipp beat both of us, I have to give you credit that you're not all talk since you finished before me. So, nice job."

"Thanks, Your Highness," Hitch said.

"Ah, just call me Zipp like everyone else," Zipp said. "Just keep in mind giving you permission to call me by my real name doesn't mean I'm not still watching you."

"That's fair," Hitch said.

Zipp smirked and nodded in approval. Hitch smiled back in respect until their faces fell, and they pursed their lips before holding their heads and whimpering and agony. Pipp followed suit, screaming, "ouch," rapidly and repeatedly while Sunny shook her head.

"It never fails. One large smoothie and you get a nasty brain freeze," she said. "That's the price you pay when participating in a Gulpathon."

"Yeah, but it was totally worth it," Pipp said with a smile to hide her pain. "My thirst is quenched, I got my drink for free, and now I'm the new Gulpathon champion in Maretime Bay."

"A triple score for sure,'' Sunny added before turning to Hitch with a smirk. "And if memory serves correctly, both you and the former champion have yet to have lunch, so may I suggest that you go find a place to eat with Hitch paying for both of you?"

"Both? Why am I paying for both of us?" Hitch asked while still massaging his head.

"Duh, because she is a guest and your wife. Everypony knows the husband pays for both meals on a date," Sunny said.

"Yeah, Hitch, that should be obvious for a gentlecolt like you," Izzy said.

Hitch opened his mouth to protest, but all he could do was sputter until he huffed and lowered his head in defeat.

"Fine, but we're going to have to do takeouts. I'm still on duty," he said.

"Oh, come on, Hitch, the sheriff's station isn't going to miss you. You did promise a tour of the town," Sunny rebuked.

"I know, but I don't like the idea of leaving Sprout alone for too long,'' Hitch said.

"Who is Sprout?" Pipp asked.

"He's my deputy. I need to keep an eye on him because he is still a little prejudiced against unicorns and pegasi," Hitch said. "The only creatures I consider obedient in the station are the critters."

Pipp's eyes widened, and she let out a loud gasp.

"You have critters?!" she asked.

"Yeah, a couple of seagulls and a crab," Hitch said.

"Oooo. I want to see the critters!" Pipp chirped. "Let's grab food and eat at the sheriff's station so I can meet the critters!"

"Are you sure? The station isn't the fanciest place for two ponies to eat out together," Hitch said.

"I don't mind," Pipp said. "Besides, you did promise me a tour, and it only makes sense that I visit your job at some point. So, might as well, right?"

Sunny and Zipp gave Pipp concerned looks, thinking she may be too kind to Hitch, who was not yet putting Pipp before his badge. Hitch, on the other hand, smiled and said, "Well then, what are we waiting for?"

With that, Hitch and Pipp walked away, with Pipp giving everypony else a wave. Everypony silently watched as Hitch and Pipp left, and Zoom turned to Zipp with a salute.

"Your Highness, do you want us to follow them?" She asked.

Zipp's frown deepened as she thought about it, then said, "Yes, but be discreet. Keep a close eye on the sheriff's station outside. Be ready to come to Pipp's aid should anything happen."

"Very good, Your Highness," Zoom said as she and Thunder saluted.

The royal guards marched in Hitch and Pipp's direction, keeping at a distance. Zipp kept her eye on Pipp and Hitch as they walked away until Sunny put her hoof on her shoulder.

"Don't worry, Zipp. Your sister will be fine," Sunny said. "Married or not, Pipp couldn't be in safer hands in Maritime Bay."

Zipp kept her gaze momentarily before she sighed and turned to Sunny.

"Maybe you're right, but it's going to take more than your words to assure me," Zipp said. "Besides, Presto was somepony we thought we didn't have to worry about either, so I see no reason to believe that this will be different right away."

"I understand. Just know for the record that I believe you are worrying for nothing," Sunny said. "In the meantime, I still have work to do, but how about Izzy gives you your own tour around town?"

Izzy let out a long gasp with her face stretching from ear to ear.

"Showing a new friend around my new home?!" she squealed. "This is going to be the best! I can even show you where I get my materials for unicycling!"

Zipp hesitated, not wanting to spend her time working on arts and crafts, but after a moment, she accepted there no there's no other choice, for she had nothing better to do with Zoom and Thunder keeping an eye on Pipp in her stead.

"Sure. Why not?" she answered with a forced grin.

"Yay!" Izzy squealed. "I hope you like glitter cause our first stop is showing you the store where I get, like, boatloads of it in many colors."

Zipp chuckled while keeping her forced grin as Izzy took her by the hoof and began dragging her to the arts and crafts store. Sunny giggled as she watched them go and went back inside her stand just as more customers began coming. As Sunny began making smoothies, she looked in the direction of the sheriff’s station.

"Hitch, please start opening up more."