It's not bad I think maybe it's because of caribous.

The story is not that far so you can change it up maybe go with adventure through (name of planet) it would be a great way to show off the world and the people there by having them explore the world maybe have dearing do join in for and epic battle fantasy world tour

11140230
I have plan to that world but... 2 more season. This story focus on Caribou kingdom (not Fall of Equestria story, don't worry)

not very strong sentences in the first 7 paragraphs.

1. Celestia can move the sun which is more enough. Also she also moved the moon for 1,000 years.
2. Luna can move the moon with magic.
3. Fancy pants is making a 5 year project of solar panels (good job this was the smartest thing but I doubt that he would do such a thing since he seems more of a butler.)
4. Old ways causes many diseases I doubt that since magic is an easy fix.
5. Black mage.... this makes me think of final fantasy 14 0_0...

Chapter 1 seems a bit messy.

"Oh... Sorry for disturbing you, your Majesty." One of the guards bows to the Sister, " I see Chrysalis is coming here so I chase her to here but I lost."

Sabrina sighs, "I wonder how long I will stuck in this stupid form," Eldaro laughs as everyone starts talking.

Celestia nods as she follows the earth pony to the courtroom. Luna turn to the duo, "So, do you want to watch the court?"

The court is started as Eldaro takes a seat next to Sabrina to watch the Sisters taking the court.

Celestia rubs her chin, "Interesting. So why do you want us to invest this project of yours? If it

The court is started as Eldaro takes a seat next to Sabrina to watch the Sisters taking the court.

who will cost the money?"

The court is started as Eldaro takes a seat next to Sabrina to watch the Sisters taking the court.

Eldaro and Sabrina follow the Sister to the training room. When they are walking, a white cat with a blue aura flies into Celestia's head and lies on her. Celestia feels annoyed while the duo is surprised when seeing that cat.

"Oh .. about that... My husband and sister allow me to track this world." Amelia slides down to the white alicorn's back, " I got to say this fur is more comfortable than I thought. Now I see why my husband like to lie on her too much,"

you should look back at this... again >.> it still needs more work.

Sister might be a character but it isn't a characters name... you should fix this on all chapters.

oh this is still chapter 1

11334318
Wel about this "Sisters", I throught Celestia and Luna have that title "The Sisters"