Magical and Beautiful stories of Anguish

by La Clown

Chapter 3 Again!!: So many hi-jink

Chapter 3 Again!!: So many hi-jinks

‘’For the damn last time, will ya all put me down!’’

‘’Of course, we have arrived.’’

The ponies transporting Applejack finally let the farm pony down after carrying her for several blocks.

Happy to at last feel the dirt on her hooves, she saw before her was a rather large wooden building that appeared to be some kind of workshop. And to the right of it, were barrels stacked one on top of the other, forming a rather impressive mountain.

‘’I see where ah am. Now listen up brotherhood of airheads. Ah said it once, ah said it twice, ah said it practically every minute ya’ll hauled me over here, but ah’ll say it one more time. Ah am not yer chorister, hay ah not even a cow.”

Sadly like with her prior complaints it once again fell on deaf ears, leaving the applebucking mare stumped. “Consarnit, what in the hay do I have to do to get through to these fools?”

As if to answer her conundrum, her eyes drifted to one of the barrels, more specifically the water seemingly leaking out of a small crack within it.

“Ah am OH! A barrel of water! Just what ah need. Just a sec ya guys.”

Not missing a beat, she immediately ran to the barrel, and took it with both her front hooves.

“Hum, you have to pay for the water. Two bits.”

“Later.”

Lifting it high, she sent its contents splashing all over her.

Though a little on the messy side, it proved to do the trick as the layer of black and white melted away to reveal her beautiful orange colored fur.

“There, ya see?” Applejack paused to shake some of the water off her and her hat. “I told yah, I, am, a, pony. And also not the one you seek. You get it now?”

The aforementioned brotherhood looked to have a wide variety of thoughts on this revelation. Some looked shocked, some embarrassed. But Applejack wouldn’t wait for them to get her point across.

“Now, are we all clear on everything? No more misunderstandings?”

The group all nodded in the affirmative that seemed to finally put AJ’s worries at ease. Oh if only it were that easy.

‘’Wait, I recognize her. It’s Applejack! This is even better. We can have Applejack at our founding anniversary!’’

That comment got the expected response from the intended guest of honor.

‘’What! Geez, ya really no good at listening to others. Bad enough ya’ll basically kidnapped me, why should I stick around? And what’s this story of song and anniversary?”

The stallion, who seemed to be the leader, went to take a dignified pose.

‘’We are… the Brotherhood of the Barrel Builder.’’

All the stallions went shouting ‘’The Brotherhood’’.

It was at this moment, Applejack understood. She was with weirdos.

‘’A brother… hood! Ah don’t want to judge but it isn't a bit… too much?’’

‘’Oh, well we chose that name mainly because with it, we have three ‘B’s. But the importance is that we are very proud of our job and the barrels we make are one of the most important exports of the town. To make our work even greater, we sing as we build those cylindrical marvels. We are famous for that. And today is the anniversary of the foundation of the brotherhood.’’

All the stallions again went shouting ‘’The Brotherhood.’’.

‘’Not now guys!” The leader said at the still boisterous crowd. “Anyway, we wanted to celebrate by bringing a chorister that would make our work song even greater. But now that you're here, this could become the best anniversary that we ever had.”

The head of the group at least had the decency to look apologetic when he said that last part, even bowing his head as a follow up. “Please Miss Applejack, it would be the greatest honor for our group if you’d take part.”

Without any coaxing, all the stallions bowed their heads to her in a respectful and pleading manner, their muzzles nearly touching the ground.

‘’Please Miss Applejack, we would like you to join us in our work. Of all the Mane 6 you have always been a source of inspiration for us. Your dedication and unbreakable work ethic is something we all aspire to achieve. Plus your woodworking skills are nothing to sneeze at either. With you at our side, it will be a day that we will never forget.’’

But in-front of all this devotion, Applejack was giving to them a fixed stern look, staying like this for a few seconds and then, raising her right eyebrow.

‘’Now, let me get this straight. Ya want me to work and sing with ya, in a job that has absolutely nothing to do with mea, even though ya just dragged me across a bunch of city blocks against ma will without listening to me, which means that technically ya’r should be the ones that owns me one? … … For real, do ya really think ah am that nice and that ah will say yes?’’

*LATER*

‘’Eeyup. Ah am that stupidly nice. Why it is so hard for me to say no?’’

In the end, refusing their request had been too much for her. Oh she gave them a massive earful for the kidnapping, and they swore up and down they would pay her back. Yet in spite of everything, she caved to their request.

Applejack was often buying barrels for her apples and ciders. And it was now dawning on her that the very barrels she was using for years were being made here. Honestly the BBB engraved in each barrel should’ve been the first clue, but she never really questioned it. Heck that only increased her desire to lend a hoof. As a hard-working producer of good herself, her sense of community was too compelling.

Also, their pleading eyes, a dirty trick AJ thought, was the final nail to the coffin.

Obviously, she was doing it with a bit of reluctance at first, at least they didn’t force her to dance. At worst it was just a rowdy party with a group of ponies she didn’t know. Awkward but not exactly unpleasant, and after a couple cups of cider, she started to have fun.

Forced inclusion aside, she respected the brotherhood’s work ethic. They were doing their tasks in perfect harmony in a way that was even more synchronized than an assembly line. Cutting the staves, putting them into metal hoops, make a fire inside so that the heat can bend the wood, making the heads and polishing them.

And their tune was so catchy that it was hard for AJ not to move her hooves to the rhythm. And so she did and was quickly infected by their enthusiasm. It was so fun that she was even doing some backflip with them, some polka dance and drinking cider, all that in singing. Though, you had to wonder what all that could have anything to do with barrel crafting.

Then again, she knew plenty of ponies who did all kinds of things counterintuitive to their job. Even she was guilty of that as Rarity has so helpfully pointed out that one time.

Regardless, everything was fine and dandy, that is until one of the builders, in the midst of enjoying their jaunty tune, accidently swung a piece of wood that smacked her stenson off and into an open barrel.

In good humor, AJ simply went to recover it and reached down into the barrel. But another builder, equally as jubilant, ended up bumping into AJ’s flank, sending her head first into the barrel.

‘’Ouch! *sigh* Now that smarts.” AJ groaned, rubbing her still sore nose while trying to navigate how to move her body in this small and awkward space. “And here I was finally starting to enjoy myself, humm… wait! Where did the light go?!’’

In spite of the attention she’d initially drawn, it turns out the Brotherhood partied just as hard as Pinkie, meaning their awareness of anything else was just as bad. Thus it shouldn’t have been surprising the singing builders had put the barrel head on where Applejack was and sealed it.

As one can expect, seeing the light being snuffed out, ontop of being in a less than comfortable position was doing little to improve AJ’s mood.

"Concernant. Don’t those yahoos hear me?” She practically shouted that part but received no response. “Dangit, I’d buck my way out of her, but it’s so dang tight I can’t wind my legs back.”

As the trapped farm pony mused over escape possibilities, the partying ponies They even went to transport her to the pile, still ignorant as to what had happened and because of the music, nopony was hearing her shouting.

And so she was put at the bottom with the other barrels. Oh, and her head was upside-down.

So yeah, not exactly having a good day.

‘’Oooh the hay. There is always something like this going on. Like if some prankster wants to turn ma life into a cheap comedy. The only thing missing is *huff**huff* that in my struggle for going out ah fell *hompf* yeah just like that, and then that led to me by rolling down the hill until ah could not stoooowowowowowo AAAAAH COME ON!!!’’

Applejack could barrel scream as she felt her world go sideways before immediately picking up speed in one direction. And yet, even in spite of that, the partying ponies that got her into this mess remained as ignorant as ever.

---

‘’I tell you, there’s no greater feeling than flying on a paraglider. For too long, only pegasis could enjoy flying among the clouds. Even with all the flying contraptions ponykind has made, we still haven’t managed to crack that one frontier and feel the rush of adrenaline to make one with the wind. But we, the 'Lover of Thrills' have found a way to be like them and use the sport of paragliding to fly like birds. We will gladly let you try for free.’’

The aforementioned Lover of Thrills spoke with so much conviction it was honestly inspiring…even if part of it did sound like a sales pitch. Though that didn’t bother his current customer, a familiar pink pony, one single bit.

‘’Oh that looks like super-duper fun! I’m actually used to flying, mostly with balloons, flying them and tying myself to them, though I guess it is technically more floating. Oh oh oh, there was one time when I was freefalling from a pirate airship, gosh that was a fun ride. Ah, how could I forget, I had also built a flying bicycle thingamajig with things I'd found there and there but it crashed on my first try because of a grumpy griffon. And before I had the chance to patent it, can you believe it.’’

Oddly enough, in spite of the chaotic and somewhat absurd list of things Pinkie had just said, the hang glider pony seemed to be hanging off her every word.

‘’Waaaa, I'd always known your life was so rad! You’re truly an inspiration for aeronautics.’’

‘Awww, that’s so sweet of you to say.” Pinkie responded with her usual smile. “’But I’ve never flown on a paraglider before. This should be great. I’m sold. Even if you had brought me here without my consent or opinion but, oh well, I’m used to it anyway.’’

That last part seemed to get a reaction from her abductors, three young earth ponies who were all wearing colorful punk hairs.

Once Pinkie had broken off from the others, she was almost immediately roped into the antics of this trio, who practically dragged her to this cliff, currently being used by several paragliders with a few already flying in the sky with ropes connecting them to the ground.

The one who initially gave her their little sales pitch, the Lover of Thrills, was wearing his red mane in a mohawk style and was clapping his hooves like a happy foal.

‘’Oh yeah, I knew it, I knew you would be stoked for this.’’

‘’Ah thank you but... what makes you so sure?’’

‘’Don’t you wear the emblematic hairstyle that all thrill seekers of Happy Town wear? I assumed that you wanted to dress like us as a sign of enthusiasm.’’

Pinkie’s eyes immediately shifted into question marks at the odd word choice. ‘’Emblematic what?!’’

Pinkie’s hair was certainly a little on the distinct type, but compared to the spike covered and jagged edged hair styles of the group in front of her, it was like apples and oranges. So why the confusion.

One of Pinkie’s eyes immediately stretched out like taffy and went at least two feet up before getting a clear look at her hair. Surprise suprise, her normally puffy hair currently ressemble the back of a hedgehog thanks in part to the prior electrocution.

‘’Oh right, I can’t believe I forgot about that. Silly Billy."

Returning her eye to its original spot, she put her hoof on her mouth, took a big expiry and her hair inflated then deflated like a balloon, returning to its more fluffy cotton candy style.

The stunt actually earned a few applause from some of the ponies watching.

‘’There, much better. Sorry guys, the hair thing was just a misunderstanding, I’d never actually heard of you. But still, this does look really fun, so would you let me try? Please, it’s like my dream. My dream from twenty seconds at least. Still count right?’’

Surprisingly, the three thrill seekers seemed unfazed by the revelation. Still nodding and smiling with the same level of excitement as before.

‘’Heck, that’s good enough for us. So now, prepare to have the experience of your life. Go take a seat Pinkie Pie.’’

They nicely went about installing her on the seat and put on her head a helmet, which proved a little more challenging thanks to the spring from her hair.

Afterwards, a pegasus used her wings to create a wind below the paraglider. That wind propelled in the air and Pinkie Pie with it. Then, the ponies on the ground pulled a crank, giving more rope and giving Pinkie more height.

At first, she was a little afraid and was gripping the ropes like she was gripping for her life. But then, the fear quickly left her out and something else took place. A feeling of rush and adrenaline surged in her and gave her a burst of giggling.

‘’Oh! Wow! WOOOOOOOHOO! They were right. Hehehe… HAHAHAHAHA. The thrill, the thrilllll. This is nothing like riding a hot air balloon or my flying thingamajig. I feel like I am a bird flying proudly in the blue expanse. Hey, you below. Higher. I want to go higher.’’

The trio’s similes quickly matched hers with excitement.

‘’Higher she said! She speaks our language. Alright then, let’s go all the way.’’

They turned the crank like crazy, bringing the pink pony up to greater heights.

‘’Let's bring her all the way to the top. By the way, just to make sure dude, you did make sure the noose you made was solid?’’

‘’Made? I thought that was you who had that job.’’

That actually caused the group’s smiles to drop, as a sense of concern wormed its way in.

“Wait, then what is the rope tied to... Oh crap!’’

Not losing a second, he stopped the turning crank but it was too late. The rope circling the cylinder had already finished unwinding. It untied and gently flew away.

Pinkie was not aware of her predicament and continued to monolog with her hooves reaching out to the heavens in a poetic way.

‘’Higher. I want to fully bask in the divine glory of the sun. I want to see all the beauty of Equestria from above. I want to become a sister with the white citizens from above. Higher I say. Higher to the heaven.’’

And it was when she received no response from the normally energetic crowd she finally looked down. Her eyes immediately darted the rope dangling pitifully, cutting her link with terra firma.

And given this is Pinkie Pie, you can already figure out what happened next.

‘’Wha!? … … Less higher less higher less higher LESS HIGHERWHAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! SOMEPONY GET ME DOWN!!!’’

Poor Pinkie went flying powerlessly to the distance until, to the ponies on the ground, she was nothing more than a silhouette on the sun.

Unfortunately for Pinkie, their priorities on the situation were currently elsewhere.

‘’Dude, she’s so lucky. It reminds me of my first time.’’

---

Mayor Paternal was calmly walking about the street, still beaming about the day's events.

“To think we finally get to host our heroes in our little town. Truly a dream come true I only hope they are all having a wonderful time here.”

That thought only made him smile brighter as he started to whistle a jaunty tune, only to halt when he spotted a familiar yellow pegasus looking utterly lost. More like in a daze.

‘’Ah Fluttershy! Good to see you. How are you?’’

‘’Well, I just came from, hum, actually I don’t really know what I had seen and I think I’d prefer to forget it.” She seemed to shiver uncomfortably at the memory and quickly shook it off. “I was hoping to find something to take my mind off it’ am actually searching for something to make me think at something else but hum… do you know something that would be perfect for a quiet introvert animal lover.’’

“As a matter of fact, I have just the thing. Why not see the kelpies.’’

Like flipping a switch, Fluttershy’s reserved demeanor immediately shifted to boundless excitement at the mention of critters.

‘’The kelpies! Ohh, I’ve never heard of them.’’

‘’Well, they’re primarily aquatic creatures that live in a a little lake at the outskirts of our town and they’re actually exclusive to said lake. This is the only place where they live.”

The mayor quickly pulled a brochure seemingly out of thin air and opened it up to reveal a map, which included pictures of said lake and even some depictions of the creatures.

“Kelpies are very gentle marine creatures, a little shy, but if you know how to gain their trust, they become very affectionate friends. Once each week, the rental boat shop opens a kelpie tour to see these creatures, with respect for their privacy of course. And it happens that today is the day of the tour. It sounds like something perfect for you. It is just in this direction and if you go now HEIN!!! ... Miss Fluttershy?’’

He had just looked elsewhere for a moment but Fluttershy had disappeared. He turned to see behind him and saw a trail of dust clouds going to the direction he had pointed.

“Huh…glad I could be of service.”

At the lake in question, on the small dock, was a small house that was used as the ticket booth. The clerk was about to change the sign from open to close but before he could do it, a yellow hoof was put on the sign, two bits were placed on the counter, and Fluttershy gave a sweet and apologetic smile that no one could resist.

‘’Is it too late for a ticket?’’

---

After having a few minutes to catch her breath, and fill out the necessary paperwork, Fluttershy was seated in a boat with three other ponies with an orange life preserver and a fisher hat.

As the group rowed across the lake, Fluttershy couldn’t help but giggle with excitement as she gazed upon the water.

As a lover of all animals, the opportunity to see a new species was an exciting moment for her. The only thing that would’ve made the moment better is if she had a camera with her.

Eventually, the boat was now far past the center of the lake and had arrived at the border, where high grass was coming from the water and was filled with the lullaby song of toads and crickets. And in mere moments, they all saw a large shadow swimming in the deep.

‘’I see it, I see it! Is it one of them?’’

‘’Yes, there is no doubt, it is a kelpie,” The tour guide stated matter of factly. “That was quick. But there is a chance that it will not surface. They are very shy creatures.’’

At the mention of shyness, our resident animal lover immediately jumped at the chance to lend a hoof.

‘’Wait. Let me try something.’’

Fluttershy went flying just a little above the water and started to sing a sweet melody. At first, nothing seems to happen. However, soon the shadow started rising again and started to emerge in a huge trail of water, revealing its brown fur. And, once it was fully exposed, Fluttershy had her eyes shining before this massive animal. It looked a lot like a seal but with long and elongate horse arms with fins on them.

‘’Oh my! You are so beautiful. Come here little one for that I can give you a good scrubby scrubby.’’

The kelpie instantly came closer to make himself accessible to be scratched on the neck by the flying pegasus. In mere seconds, he was making all manner of pleased sounds, much to Fluttershy’s increasing delight.

‘’Oh yes, you are a good kelpie, yes you are.’’

He quickly took a liking to Fluttershy and gave her a lick to the cheek which she responded to with a happy giggle while the other tour guests simply watched the scene in complete awe…save for the guide who looked more concerned for some reason.

---

Mayor Paternal was in the midst of returning to his home when he suddenly stopped in his tracks because as a realization suddenly hit him.

‘’Oh dear! I completely forgot to tell Miss Fluttershy that once a kelpie befriends you, he has a very… unique way to show his affection. I hope she will not find it too off-putting.’’

---

‘’*mumble**mumble**mumble**mumble**mumble*’’

Let me tell you something. The method the kelpies use for showing their love to non-kelpies consists of... putting said individuals inside their mouths. As strange as it sounds. But despite how it might look to some, the action was perfectly harmless.

Sadly, the pony on the receiving end of this, wasn’t exactly seeing it as such. .

Fluttershy’s upper-body was presently in the mouth of the kelpie while her legs were spastically kicking about in panic. You could see in the eyes of the kelpie that he was only playing and was very happy. Fluttershy….not so much.

Of course the rest of the group didn’t see it that way.

‘’Damn, she is so lucky. Only those the kelpie trust the most are given their ultimate proof of affection. And she did that on her first meeting. She really is a pro.’’

Unfortunately for Fluttershy, things weren’t over as the kelpie shifted directions and went to the horizon with still the yellow pegasus in her mouth, whose panic only intensified. And again her fellow watchers could only look on in awe.

‘’And now he is taking her to his home! How I wish to be in her place.’’

---

‘’You deserve it, Rarity, you fool. Oh, after all the mistakes you’ve made over my own hubris you’d think the lesson would stick but no Rarity, you did it again. And now, thanks to your ego, you’ve managed to hurt poor innocent ponies. Me include.’’

After the incident Rarity was left wandering the town, mascara dripping from her eyes, not helping her already blurry vision, not that she cared much at this point.

Her vision was at least enough to avoid bumping into bystanders, but she was well and truly lost. If there was any kind of advantage to this situation, it was that her current state of myopia kept her from being able to see the dumbfounded expressions of other ponies as she continued to monolog to herself.

‘’Why do I have such difficulty tempering myself? It is true that creativity is what I live for, but that is no reason to let my demons command me or other cliché rationales of artists.”

She let out another rather loud moan as tears leaked again from her eyes, forcing her to rub them clean.

“Ugh, as if I couldn’t feel any worse, I think the mascara is starting to burn my eyes.” Slowly opening her slightly burning eyes and blinking a few times, to her relief the haze in her vision finally cleared.

“Ahhhh! Finally, my vision is clear again. Now then….where pray tell did I wander off to during my little episode?”’

‘’That was exactly what we were asking ourselves. Mind explaining why you’re in our house?’’

Rarity had nearly jumped of fright from these three strangers sitting at a table. And she was even more surprised to see that she was no longer outside, but that she had barged without noticing it inside the house of someone else.

‘’Oh my! Malaise.’’

Immediately bowing her head in embarrassment and apology, Rarity was quick to offer some explanation.

‘’I beg your pardon for the unwanted intrusion. Please accept my apologies, I was distracted by something of a personal matter, but that is no excuse for such uncouth behavior. I’ll simply get out of your hair.” Rarity again bowed her head as respectively as she could as she stepped back towards the door. “Please, have a good day.”

Sadly for Rarity, it seemed like the residents had other ideas.

‘’Now just wait a moment! You know, now that I think about it, don’t you find that she looks a lot like Rarity?’’

“Why yes, you’re right, it is her! The famous Rarity is here in our club! Please, nevermind the unexpected intrusion, we are honored to have you here and at our table if you would be so kind.”

The three ponies whom she’d intruded upon appeared to belong to some form of high society. Each had prominent and thick mustaches, monocles on their eyes and elegant top hats.

Rarity was somewhat hesitant to accept the offer. Her experiences in Canterlot had made her painfully aware of how shallow, abrasive and arrogant high class ponies could be. It was certainly not the kind of pony she aspired to be. However, she’d also seen through ponies like Fancy Pants that plenty of the upper class were just as compassionate as her friends could be. Besides, they offered after all.

‘’Weeell, I suppose it couldn’t hurt. Though again I do apologize for intruding on all of you.”

“Oh, please. Think nothing of it. It was an honest mistake,” One of the ponies, with a dark gray coat, light gray mane and train shaped cutie mark said with a smile. “Gus, go grab the plate and bring it here.”

The aforementioned pony, a server by his attire, immediately left the room through some double doors while Rarity herself took a seat at the table.

“I must say Miss Rarity, it is a true pleasure to have you in our club. We here like to see ourselves as those of a more refined taste, something I believe you can appreciate. I’m sure you will love it”

His word choice set off some warning signs for Rarity, having heard Upper Crust and Jet Set say something similar. “Well sir, I can say my palate is certainly more polished than others.”

Another of the ponies, this one with a wine red coat, amber mane and a wheel for a cutie mark, seemed to agree with her self assessment. “Surely with your eye for details you are one who recognizes true quality.”

“Oh you flatter me good sir.” Rarity offered a reply with a smile and light blush. “But when one works in the world of fashion, a keen eye for details is essential.”

The last of the three ponies, this one with a beige coat, white mane and newspaper for a cutie mark, concurred with her. ‘’Indeed, and such a keen eye is exactly what we’re looking for in our group of exclusive cheese lovers.’’

‘’Yes…” Rarity immediately started blinking rapidly as her mind caught up to what was said. “I’m sorry, what was the last part?”

A plate of cheese was deposited before her, hum, more like a mountain of cheese of all kinds appeared before her.

‘’You… are cheese lovers!?’’

The gray pony immediately nodded. ‘’That’s right. Our love for the delights of lactose is such that we've formed an esteemed group where we may gather and explore all the possible flavors that the cheese can give us. Each reunion is a pure delight for us.’’

‘’Ummn, perfect texture, scented but nor overabundant, and a small taste of onion,’’ The red noblepony spoke next, sampling one of many blocks of cheese from the plate.

‘’Creamy to the point it spill naturally in my throat, a mixing of so many savers and the taste kick right in the brain,’’ The beige pony almost seemed to moan in delight as he indulged as well in the creamy delights.

As the trio continued to both talk about and consume what looked to be various types of expensive cheese, Rarity found her brain had gone dark for a moment as she tried to process everything.

“Suddenly I’m wondering if these three are actually as wealthy as they act or if that’s all it is, an act.”

Her musing was brief as she found the plate pushed in front of her, with the three club members all looking at her with expectant and eager eyes.

While a part of her was tempted to politely refuse and simply leave, given the showing she’d already made it would’ve been rude to simply walk out without at least indulging them.

Thus she hesitantly levitated a random piece of cheese and took a bite of it.

The flavor itself was certainly much richer than some of what she was used to and it didn’t taste especially bad or anything. However, despite how sophisticated and upper class she acted, indulging in expensive cheese was never something she had an interest in. Thus her refined input proved to be rather concise.

“Hmm, it’s certainly an interesting taste. I can say the flavor and texture are more exceptional compared to what I’m used to.” Rarity made it a point to speak with the same level of conviction she did with her clothes, even if she was essentially bullshiting her way out of the situation.

Luckily for her the three colts seemed to take what she said well, all smiling with apparent euphoria.

“Splendid, what input.”

“Indeed my good sir, truly inspired.”

“Oh, how fortunate we are to have her with us.”

Rarity actually felt herself sweating nervously at the exaggerated praise she was receiving and was tempted to now take her leave. Unfortunately, the three didn’t seem quite satisfied, eyeing the still considerably stacked cheese plate.

And in that moment, Rarity felt her stomach ache with phantom pains, dreading what was to come.

*LATER*

The white unicorn went rushing to the street, though now looking more green than white. She had eaten too many cheeses and was feeling sick. But she was still trying to do her best to say her thanks to the three ponies, her hoof over her mouth.

‘’Thank you, guuh, thank you so much for the invitation. It was really delicious che, blurg... no I can’t say the word. It was a fuurh, heum fun moment so see you... see you... see you soon and… oh damn!’’

She did not have the strength to finish and go running faster than she had ever run, leaving the three cheese ponies to watch her gradually disappear.

‘’Hum, maybe we should have been a little more moderate with her. This hobby can be overwhelming for newcomers.’’

‘’But we have so much of the joy for life it’s hard to imagine anypony not sharing our sentiments.’’

‘’So true. … So, what do you say we go grab more cheese?’’

‘’Oh excellent idea.’’

---

Rarity was desperately searching for somewhere to puke, frantically looking in all directions while running like crazy, which was not doing her poor stomach any favors. But then she found an empty trash can and put her head inside to do what she no longer had the strength to stop.

‘’Blablebluuurrrrrrrgh… bleblarrrgh… … oh, that was brutal.” Rarity groaned in agony, not even bothered by the foul smell of the contents of her stomach, slowly pulling her head out the can.

Her body slowly slid down, not having the strength to support herself. “Ugh, I desperately need a shower and some mouthwash. This has truly been a dreadful experience, and the only solace I can take from it is at least no pony has to see me in such an undignified state.”

‘’RARITYYYYYYY.’’

‘’Pinkie!!!’’

What surprised her was not to have heard her friend but that her voice was coming from above. She looked up and her eyes immediately dilated because she simply couldn't understand what she was seeing.

Having known the party planner for years, Rarity had long accepted a little customary insanity from her friend. Still, seeing said pony seemingly flying in a paraglider with what appears to be the leftover of a rope following her like a tail was a new one. Said friend screaming her head off and desperately signaling for help conversely….

‘’Rarity, help me! I don’t know how to stop this crazy thing. I don’t want to crash.’’

By sheer luck the glider flew mere inches past the dumbfounded Rarity and continued forward, maintaining a decent distance from the ground despite its speed.

Rarity’s upset stomach suddenly became a none issue as she immediately took chase. “Hang on Pinkie, I’m here to rescue you.”

Seeing the dangling rope, Rarity focused her magic on the rope and moved it forward, allowing her to grab it with both her front hooves. Sadly this moment of victory was immediately undercut by a rather obvious fact of reality. Namely Rarity, was neither Applejack or Rainbow Dash. So instead of dragging Pinkie down, it was Rarity that was being dragged up as the unicorn felt her feet leaving the ground.

“Wait! WHAT WAS I THINKING!” Rarity mentally howled as she was dragged along the street, clinging to the rope like a lifeline.

As if some higher power was taking some delight in this misery, a large gust of wind came blowing and took the paraglider even higher, high-above the roofs of the entire town. The sudden height increase prompted Rarity to wrap all four limbs tightly around the rope and finally scream with mass hysteria.

‘’HAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! I had always dreamed about soaring to the top, but this is far too literal for me.”

In another feat of her own bizarre form of crazy, Pinkie managed to stretch her head and neck down to her imperiled friend, with an apologetic look on her face.

‘’I am so sorry Rarity, I did not want to literally drag you into my problem. But hey, at least we have company.’’

Rarity looked angrily unamused. ‘’Pinkie, darling, How on earth did you manage to get in this situation?’’

‘’Heheh, it is a long story but the truth is even I’m not sure how. With perspective, it was a reaaally weird adventure.’’

Rarity could only sigh at the lack of an answer, far too drained to freak out any more.‘’Please tell me at least that you have an idea on how to go back to terra firma? Preferably in the form of a safe landing.”

‘’Huuuuum, nope. Sorry, I’ve got nothing. Best we can do is just float on the breeze and wait for a miracle.’’

‘’Great. Now it can’t really be worse. Hoo... heeeeek! Pinkie can’t you say something, anything, to distract myself from this scary height?’’

‘’Weeeell... OH! I think I finally found an answer to why I can move my hair. Apparently I possess a unique ability to instinctively control something a scientist calls biofeedback. It is also why my hair goes down when I get depressed. Though I didn’t quite understand all the mumbo-jumbo jargon he used. Does it interest you?’’

‘’At this point Pinkie, anything could become the most fascinating conversation I ever heard.’’

---

On a green field near the town, several ponies were doing some warming-up. Another was pushing a metal cart full of clean towels.

‘’You know it is really nice of that dancing club to let us borrow some of their towels. Especially since we waste the majority of our budgets on our activities. But it is not because what we do is bloody extreme that it’s a reason to neglect our hygiene.”

Coming to a stop in front of the group, the green pegasus with the cart, and a strange accent, called out to the other ponies. “Hey mates, clean towels for everypony.’’

They all went to take each one to sweep their sweaty skins. And that was what it was needed for Rainbow Dash to break free of her prison and emerge like a volcano.

‘’GAOOOOOOO. Ah, freedom at last. Geez, I thought I’d never get out of there, I got so bored I ended up falling asleep.” Shaking out some stiffness in her legs and wings, she immediately began looking to get her bearings. “Now, where the heck am I?”

‘’Blimey, I must be dreaming! It's Rainbow Dash! The most–

‘’Yeah yeah, the Most Awesome Pony in all Equestria and yadda yadda, I already know the song,” Rainbow practically groaned out the intro, already tired of her own hype at this point. “Alright. First, Mister humm…”

“Nutter. Brave Nutter”

“Right. So, Mister Nutter. Mind telling me who you are?”

‘’Who we are! Well, we are simply humble fans of danger and thrills of all kinds.’’

Dash looked around her and saw many ponies wearing smiles that she recognized too well. Daring smiles.

‘’Oh oh oh, that sounds like ponies who speak my language. So you are sportponies?’’

‘’In a sense, yeah that’s one way to put it.” Brave Nutter nodded, eagerly. “Though, we don’t restrict ourselves to one kind of format, we are willing to do any kind of feat in the most extreme way possible.”

“How extreme are we talking here?” Rainbow asked curious, wondering just how far these guys were willing to go.‘’

‘’Like, extreme extreme.’’

The wings of Rainbow Dash went straight up, and she was starting to giggle under her throat. And despite their namesake, Nutter was observant enough to see an opportunity to gain a new follower.The other pony saw an opportunity to gain another follower.

‘’So, what’d you say Dash, wanna ride on the wild side with us?” Brave Nutter again eyed Dash eagerly. “After all, I’m sure that the legendary daredevil who nailed the Sonic Rainboom shall love our extreme way of life.’’

Dash’s face shifted to her usual confident grin, already accepting the challenge.

‘’Oh yeah, there is no greater thing than sports that force you to exceed your limits yourself. I am in.’’

*LATER*

‘’Why did I accept? I’m not in, I’m not in at all!’’

And the reason she was saying that was because she was walking with her lower legs on a tightrope several meters off the ground, her wings bound by a rope and she had a balancing pole on her upper hooves. In other words, she was doing funambulism. And she was not happy at all. No, she was so terrified that she could not move and so, she took all her frustration on the light green pegasus, Brave Nutter currently flying right next to her. the flying pegasus beside her.

‘’Are you out of your mind? What if I fall?’’

‘’Ah don’t worry, you can’t die from this height.” He said with a bit of a drone to his voice. “Many have confirmed it. Though you may lose a few teeth.” He opened his mouth to reveal a few of his front teeth were indeed missing, which only added to Rainbow’s anxiety.’’

‘’You could at least put a safety net.’’

‘’And where would be the fun in funambulism if there's no ambulance?’’

‘’First, I am pretty sure that is not how it got its name. And second, I thought you were a sports club?’’

‘’Yeah we are. The Dangerous Sports Club. The addicted ponies to life-treating moments. That what we meant earlier.’’

‘’Of course... there is always a catch....’’

Again, Nutter looked unfazed or even concerned. ‘’Oh, we do ridiculously dangerous feats where we have more chances to get hurt than to succeed. We pride ourselves in the number of times we had to go to the hospital. Life’s no fun without a little pain involved?’’

‘’That’s sick.’’

‘’I know that’s so siiiiiiick.” Nutter said happily, completely missing the obviously horrified way Rainbow spoke. “Heck, this isn’t even the craziest thing we’ve done. Check it out.”

The absent minded pegasus quickly pulled out a roll of pictures and showed them to Dash. “This one with the smiling face and several teeth missing is Geronimo after a bad landing from his cannonstalion trick. That lassie with an alligator biting her butt is Adrenaline Rush after an intense wrestling session with this reptile. Even today she still proudly shows us her scars. That one on the chair and the full-body cast is Risky Trick after one of the fastest-go-kart races there ever was. You cannot tell but under all this plaster, he had such a beaming smile. Because he had won.’’

Each picture only served to cause Rainbow’s heart to pick up speed, as sweat was now starting to pool around her hooves.

‘’Okay, I am in a madhouse because everypony in this town is CRAZY. I need to get away from these psychos before I get killed.”

Looking down Rainbow mentally debated if it was at all possible to escape, but with her wings bound that wasn’t possible.

It was then that a strange and faint noise suddenly entered her ears, that came from far. and seem to be coming closer.

Peering out into the distance, it was looking like something was rolling down a hill and after further inspection, Dashie was surprised to see that it was a barrel. Even more surprising, it sounded like somepony inside was calling for help.

“Woooooo woowowowoww. Dannnnnngitttt. Somepony stopppppp this thinnnnng. Hey you know, it’s begging to be fun.’’

‘’AJ!!!’’

No doubt it was Applejack. Sadly the sudden shock had caused Rainbow to lose her balance and start to fall off the tightrope.

Fortunately thanks to her finely honed reflexes, and a lot of luck, she managed to slam the tip of the pole on the ground first. It bent like a jumping pole propelled her in the sky. Of course, she couldn’t fly at the moment and instead landed her back legs lower feet right on the rolling barrel, forcing her to run on it with just two hooves, much to her grief.

‘’Wowowo oh come on come on come onnnn! Why do those things always happen to me? It’s a curse. I must be cursed.’’

‘’Wait, is that ya Dashie?’’ Applejack’s voice managed to ring out, actually banging on the barrel to get her friend’s attention.

‘’Yes it’s me. How have you manage to get into… whatever you are now?’’

‘’You know what, ah was asking myself the same thing. It’s like some malicious god was having fun making our life a comedic segment. At least we are now both in this together.’’

‘’Yeah, biiiig consolation. Oh well, let’s just roll with it..’’

‘’That… was not funny.’’

‘’I know.’’

Sadly the two poor ponies currently had no choice but to continue to roll and roll towards the horizon. All the while, the pegasus with the weird accent and his friends were left thoroughly damn impressed by the performance of Rainbow.

‘’Oi oiii... this is just too insane! We must definitely add this activity to our list.’’

Author's Note:

Were you surprised that this is another chapter 3? Yeah, since it was basically the same thing as the previous one, I decided it would be a fun idea. Even though comedy is not the focuse of this story, (despise the apparences,) I hope you found those sketchs funnies and creatives. If it at least make you chuckle a little, I consider it a win.

This was however the last comedy focused chapter. Soon the tone will shift to a more dramatic one. But before that, we have one last chapter where we will properly meet 'the' most important pony of the whole story. And the one I am the most pround.

Note of the author: The Dangerous Sport Club in the last sketch is actually based on the club founded by adventurers and extreme sport pioneers in Oxford and London. It was active until 1970. That's why the caracter Nutter sound surprisly... british.