Starship Trooper

by chief maximus

III

Fox strapped himself into his Arwing as Slippy and the rest of the crew saw him off.

"You sure you want to go it alone, Fox?" Slippy asked through the comm channel.

He nodded. "I'll be alright guys, I'm just going to do a low orbit scan of the planet. If he's not there, we can at least get out of this sector before anyone notices."

"Your funeral..." Slippy mumbled, disconnecting the fueling and coolant hoses from his spaceship.

"And have those laser cores charged by the time I get back!" Fox said before his Arwing was catapulted off into the darkness of space, the lush planet looming in the distance.

Alone with his thoughts, Fox watched the world grow larger in his canopy. "Looks like we've got clouds, seemingly mundane weather patterns... Let's see what ROB found on this rock." Fox pulled up a screen in his cockpit, filled with sparse details about this unexplored, unnamed planet.

"Geez, not much to work with... dominant species: unknown, tertiary life forms: unknown..." Fox continued to scroll through the list, but wasn't finding much useful information. On the last page of the report, however, the probability of Falco's ship crash landing here was 87 percent.

"Well, I like those odds," He said to himself. "Alright guys, I'm initiating an ion trace, standby."

Another page popped up on his screen, with a progress bar. The scan would take a while to complete, so he settled in, staring at the unassuming planet below him. "You better be down there you dumb bastard."

---

He had no idea how, but he found himself completely paralyzed. His blaster sat stubbornly in its holster, no matter how hard he strained against whatever held him in place.

What sounded like hat horse was the first to speak up, though since he had his back to them, he could only guess.

"That's it! Thats the thing that shot magic at Mac and I!"

Falco felt himself turn around in mid air, still frozen. The unicorn-ish thing brought him closer, staring at his forehead for some reason.

"I don't see how, he doesn't appear to have any magical appendages..."

'That's not what the ladies of the Lylat system said,' He thought to himself. He would have smirked, if he were able.

"I-it was speakin' some crazy language before it tried to zap us. Maybe it was like a spell or somethin', like them ones Zecora uses!" Big red suggested.

Purple shifted her gaze from his forehead to his eyes, then at his dirty and torn uniform. He was trying to look intimidating, but unfortunately she had managed to paralyze him with a shocked and startled expression that he was helpless to change.

"Oh my gosh, the poor thing looks scared!"

Falco wasn't even allowed the dignity of an eye-roll.

"Do you speak? Can you understand us?" Purple asked.

Suddenly, he felt from his neck up regain movement. Figuring trying to talk to them in the dominant galactic language was a lost cause without a translator in their ears, he simply nodded, hoping that meant yes in their strange language of whinnies and grunts.

"I think he does!" Purple said excitedly. "Okay, I'm going to let you go now, we aren't going to hurt you. Are you going to run away if I release you from my magic?"

'Magic? What the heck kind of planet is this?' he thought. Building on his previous knowledge, he shook his head 'no'.

The purple glow disappeared and he found himself mobile again. Falco looked at the horse-like creatures standing before him, silence between them all.

Without warning, he tried to dart back into the safety of the woods.

"Wait!"

There would be no waiting for him, as Falco sprinted as fast as his tired legs could carry him. He had almost made it to the woodline when the ground came rushing up to meet him.

---

Falco's head and arm were throbbing. He let out a slight groan, putting his hand gingerly to his forehead. He cracked open his eyes, his world slowly coming into focus. He was on his back, lying on something incredibly itchy.

"Twilight! Twilight, it's waking up!" a voice said from beyond his peripheral vision.

He took his hand off his head and rested it at his side. He grabbed a handful of his makeshift mattress and held it up.

'Hay?' he thought.

As he let the stalks fall weakly to the floor, he heard footsteps coming towards him. He managed to shift his head to the right in time to see the trio of horses from before walking up to him.

"W-What happened?" he asked softly, almost any noise creating a pounding between his ears.

"There he goes talkin' that gibberish again," Big Red commented.

"It may be incomprehensible to us, but it does seem to follow typical speech patterns," Purple said.

As the seconds ticked by, and Falco regained more of his faculties, he remembered the other universal translator he had on him. As he reached a hand in his pocket, the horses took a cautious step back.

Slowly, he fished out the silvery earpiece. His captors seemed to relax a bit. Figuring Purple to be the brains of the outfit, he pointed to the similar one in his ear, then pointed to her, before offering it towards her. If he could at least get one of them to wear the translator, he might be able to smooth things over, and possibly coordinate a rescue.

As he feared, they simply stared at it. He gestured towards them again, a little more aggravation in his movements.

"What is that thing?" Hat horse asked.

"I don't know..." Purple replied. "But I think it wants us to have it."

The earpiece floated out of his hand and up to Purple as she squinted at it, Hat horse and Big Red gathering around her.

"What is this?" she asked, looking back to him. Falco did the best he could to turn his head. He removed the translator from his ear and showed them, before putting it back.

"It goes... in your ear?" Purple asked skeptically.

Falco nodded, praying she would hurry up and put it in her ear so he could stop communicating through gestures.

Hesitantly, she allowed it to float near her head before placing it gently in her ear. A small light on the earpiece turned green, and Falco spoke.

"Can you understand me?" he asked. Purple's eyes widened.

"Y-yes, I can!"

"Thank God," Falco sighed, as he collapsed back onto the hay pile he was laying on.

"What did he say, Twi?" Hat horse asked.

"He asked if I could understand him, and I could!" she announced happily.

Falco could tell, she seemed like one of those 'smart' types. He'd likely be explaining a lot to her.

"What is your name? What are you? Where are you from?" she asked, rapid fire.

"One at a time, lady, geez," Falco snapped. "Firstly, the name's Falco, secondly, I've got a broken arm and probably a concussion, so if you don't mind, I've got a bit of writhing to do before I pass out."

"Oh! You're hurt? I'll go get a doctor—"

"No!" he replied quickly. "I don't need anyone else knowing I'm here, I'm... not really supposed to be here."

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"It's... a long story," he replied.

"I see. So, is it true? Are you an alien?" She asked quietly.

Falco rolled his eyes. "I mean, technically, yes." The term 'alien' really loses some of its impact when you visit a different planet specifically to get donuts.

The purple horse seemed to start hyperventilating.

"Are you okay?' He asked.

"T-this is the greatest scientific discovery since... EVER!" she squealed.

'Oh boy,' He thought. A beeping from his stasis suit drew everyone's attention. Falco looked at the display on his injured arm. The 'low battery' alarm was flashing, as well as the low opiate alarm. Soon, the pain in his arm would be overwhelming.

"Listen, I'll answer all of your questions, but you have to promise me two things," he said.

"Of course!" Purple replied, probably to blinded by her pure curiosity to really think through what she was about to agree to.

"Good. One; no one other than you three can know about me. Two..." Falco winced as he felt the pain amplify with the gradual reduction of opiates. "Find me something to fix my broken arm!"

His plea seemed to snap Purple out of her scientific stupor. "Right! Applejack, can you get us a first aid kit?"

"Uh, sure. Mac, keep an eye on 'em." Hat horse left the barn, while Big Red and Purple stayed behind. Thankfully, they hadn't taken any of his gear, nor did they seem to rummage through his stuff. He was certainly appreciative of that. Falco had plenty of nasty surprises in his survival kit that the uninitiated might hurt themselves with.

"Falco, my name is Twilight Sparkle, Princess of friendship."

Falco raised an eyebrow at her introduction. "That's kind of a mouthful isn't it, your highness?"

"But my friends call me Twilight." She took a seat by the hay Falco was laying on and continued her inquiry. "So... since you are 'technically' an alien, to use your words... where are you from?"

Falco sighed. he supposed he had agreed to this. But, that didn't mean he had to tell his whole life story. "I'm from space. My ship crashed in the woods, and I really need to get back to it before it... well, nevermind."

"What's he sayin' Ms. Twilight?" Big Red asked. He had briefly forgotten that only Twilight had the translator.

"He says..." She considered her next words carefully. Dare she reveal to Macintosh that they had a real deal alien on their hooves? She figured he and Applejack had already assumed as much anyway. "He's from outer space, and his spaceship crashed in the woods outside your farm."

Mac's gasp drew her attention. "So... the girls weren't lyin. I just thought he was a weird runt of a griffon or something."

"Does he know I can understand him?" Falco asked with annoyance in his tone.

"Oh! How rude of me!" Twilight replied. "Falco, this is Macintosh Apple, he and his sister Applejack run the orchard you, uh... crashed in to."

"Applejack is the one with the hat?" he asked.

Twilight nodded.

"Well, can you tell them I didn't mean to shoot at them earlier." His words piqued Twilight's interest.

"Macintosh, he says he apologizes for your first meeting," she said. "But, if I may ask, how did you cast magic? Is your kind able to use it as well?"

Falco vaguely recalled some famous guy saying something along the lines of 'science is the same thing as magic' or something like that.

"It's not magic," he said, drawing his pistol from his holster on his thigh. "It's like... science or something."

---

Agent Bentgrass stared listlessly out the window as the scenery passed by outside his window. How in Celestia's name did he go from investigating changeling incursions and threats to the kingdom to chasing down UFO's. The thought alone put a sour taste in his mouth.

"Ponyville, next stop!" The conductor shouted.

He gathered his things and readied himself to depart. He was at his wits end being stuck on this train for six hours.

The engine released a billowing cloud of steam as it pulled into the rural station. He was greeted by a pony in a suit and sunglasses.

"Special Agent, I'm here to escort you to our field headquarters."

Bentgrass sighed. "Very well."

He followed the stallion to a waiting cab. Once inside, his enigmatic guide gave him yet another dossier. "This is what we have on the rogue object so far. Evidence suggests that it wasn't just a meteor."

Bentgrass reviewed the file in front of him. "Forgive my skepticism, but how do we know these aren't just doctored photographs?"

"Well sir, these were taken directly from the camera of the mares that were in the sky that day." he said calmly. "We still have the negatives."

He raised an eyebrow as he continued to pour over the files.

"So, you're telling me that we may have an actual alien in our midst?" Bentgrass asked.

"Yes sir, I am."

Comments

[FanOfMostEverything]

Always good to see more of this. Looks like third time's the charm for first contact. Now there's just the matter of all the forces arrayed against Falco to worry about...

Also, nice to see someone acknowledge the wondrous donuts of Horton VII.

[djthomp]

Interesting to see this get updated, it's been a long time. In the time since I've read another Star Fox crossover which helped me get much more familiar with the characters.

Enthusiastic alien fan Twilight was fun.

[LightningThunda]

I really love this story, but it has an almost full year break between each chapter...

[D48]

Well, I had to reread the whole thing to get back into it, but this is definitely a good story. It's nice to see old school stories like this one rising from the grave, especially since the authors doing so seem to be keeping themselves largely free of the newer stupidity.

Here's hoping future updates come faster than this last one did.

Also, when I was rereading it, I noticed a tiny plot bug. Specifically the Arwing sort of does things on its own, especially activating its cloak, which feels odd because machines don't usually do that kind of thing. It would have worked better if you instead had Falco manually activate the stealth after he woke up, but since nothing else happened during that sequence of events it ultimately doesn't really matter.

[zsewqthewolf]

see update in my fav folder