Gad and Zooks begin...
Crystal ponies of all shapes and colors lounged about the library, mutely perusing the fount of sacred knowledge. Among them was a blue hippogriff, whose light-gray talons made the faintest of clicks on the glistening floor as he passed. The hippogriff winced at the noise as it broke the careful, muted silence. The ponies, however, seemed not to notice; so he picked up his pace a bit.
In his mind, the hippogriff listed the subjects of the books he was passing; Macroscopic Abstraction, Advanced Levitation, Studies of Limbo and the Ether, Dimensional travel… Each of these subjects was something he had learned about in his studies in the past, but today he was looking for something a bit different. Ah! His mind soon attached to an ancient tome in the back; labeled long-term enchantment. He carefully slipped his claw into the recess and extracted the precious bound pages.
The front door of the library suddenly slammed open with a crack the apparent volume of a supernova. A vaguely familiar voice shouted at the top of it’s lungs; “ZOOKS!!!”
The blue hippogriff winced at the shout of his own name. He, along with half of the other residents of the library, had his attention practically ripped towards the entrance, where a yellow-feathered figure was floating in the doorway, lightly flapping his wings.
The librarian behind the desk caught the yellow griffin-like figure’s attention with a glare. “a-HEM… may I help you?” she asked with as much politeness as she could muster. The winged figure, apparently oblivious to his taboo, responded enthusiastically; “Oh! Yes, actually! I’m looking for a blue Hippogriffin; about yea high, silver highlights…”
Zooks didn’t wait for the situation to progress further.He waved down the librarian as he hurried down to ground level and spoke.
“Oh- sorry! Sorry, Amethyst! This is.. Um..”
“Brother!” Shouted the yellow figure as he practically tackled Zooks to the ground with a hug. Zooks couldn’t help but smile even as he winced.
“Yup. It’s good to see you, too, Gad.”
Almost all of the current residents of the library were staring now, causing Zooks’ cheeks to slowly start fading from blue to red. He had to say something.
“Uh, Amethyst, this is my twin brother, Gad! He’s here to help me with a bit of a project.”
Amethyst Maresbury looked Gad over with a critical eye. “Ah! So you’re the brother I’ve heard so much about these past few weeks. I’d expect someone so closely related to Zooks to have more… *ahem*… tact.”
Gad’s face twisted in confusion, then soon afterward completely drained of color. His beak then curved into a sheepish smile as his talons chased each other in tiny circles. “Eh… heheh… sorry. I was just… kinda excited.”
“Just.. don’t make it a repeat offense.” Amethyst said.
“Yes ma’am!” Gad said enthusiastically as he gave a smart, stiff-armed griffonian salute. then, realizing his mistake, he whispered; “I mean, yes ma’am.”
“...aaaaanyway-” Zooks interrupted; “I found the book I was looking for; I’d just like to check this out for a day or two, If that’s alright?”
“Yes, of course.” Amethyst said as she took the briefest of looks at the ancient tome, then opened the cover to pull out the little card on the inside and stamp it. “I hope it helps!” she said as she handed it back.
Zooks accepted the book thankfully and waved as he retreated out of the door Gad had burst in through. “Thanks! I’ll see you when I return it!”
Gad could hardly contain his excitement until the doors to the crystalline library closed behind them. The instant they clicked shut, he let out a shriek. “AAAAH! Sorry, I’m just so EXCITED! How long has it been; like... five years? Gad and Zooks, dream team, dynamic duo, back together again!” Gad spiraled into the air as he said it to punctuate. Then, as he glided down to fall into stride next his brother, who had begun to walk towards the outer edge of the crystal city, he asked; “soo… what did you call me over for anyway?”
“Uh… maybe I’ll save that bit for later.” Zooks said. “First off, how’s the smithy?”
“Eh, can’t complain. It’s nice, but… I don’t think settling down is the life for me. not yet, leastways.”
“I guess that explains the new sword,” Zooks said. Gesturing towards the scabbard on Gad’s back with a gleaming golden hilt sticking out of one end.
“Wha- oh!” Gad said as he realised what Zooks was referring to. “Well… sorta. Probably not in the way you think. It’s a bit of a long story. I’ll tell you later. Where are we going, anyway?”
“I have an apartment out on the edge of the city; It’s cheap, as far as crystal empire accommodations go anyways, and I have a project there I wanna show you.”
“Oooooooh!” Gad said as he moved to look Zooks in the face, walking backwards as Zooks moved forward. “Is that the thing you said you’d called me over to help with?”
Zooks scrunched his face in thought. “Uh, not quite. Close, though! It’s a bit of a surprise...”
Gad squinted suspiciously until he could hardly see. “Well, all right, but with all this buildup, this better be one of the BEST surprises EVER!” And with that, Gad turned around and picked up the pace, forcing Zooks to catch up a bit.
Gad nearly ran straight past Zooks’ apartment, which was a humble two-story crystal building that was wedged between two others on either side. Zooks had to give a small whistle to catch his attention before Gad noticed that he had stopped in front of it. Zooks took a deep breath before speaking;
“Alrighty, Gad… prepare to be amazed!”
Zooks dramatically threw the door open to reveal… a tent. in the middle of the apartment’s living room was a small, dome-shaped grass-green canvas tent that looked decidedly out of place among the shining crystalline furniture. Off to the side of the room was a table filled with various seemingly random implements; a blowtorch, a cup of chalk, an inkwell and quill, some random scraps of metal and cloth, and something that vaguely looked like a toaster oven that had been assembled by a mad scientist.
“Umm…. okay…” Gad said as he entered. “That’s… um… what is it?”
“It’s just a tent right now.” Zooks said.
“Oh! Phew!” Gad said, wiping his brow. “I thought one of us had gone crazy for a second. Why is there a tent in your living room?”
“Come inside and I’ll show you!” Zooks said as he unzipped the front door and beckoned Gad inside.
As Gad entered, he didn’t notice anything strange about the interior of the tent, other than a multicolored circle that had apparently been drawn on the floor and filled with complex combinations of shapes and runes. Zooks soon followed his brother in, and immediately picked the book he’d checked out from the library out of his saddlebags, opening it to the table of contents on the ground.
“Now; if I’m remembering right, the sequence I need should be riiight…” Zooks mused until his talon struck a listing. Then he quickly flipped to the indicated page and nodded, satisfied.
“Just a sec, lemme grab something.” Zooks mumbled as he exited the tent. He soon after returned with an ornate inkwell whose contents shimmered with an iridescent light. Zooks set the well down and, very carefully, dipped a quill into it. As he extracted the pen, his eyes flicked over to the diagrams contained within the book, which, to Gad, looked more like a bowl of Chineighse alphabet soup than anything else. Zooks looked satisfied, though, and gingerly moved the quill to an empty space in his circle in order to complete a small sequence of runes.
As the ink dried, Gad hesitantly stepped forward to inspect the new addition.
“Um… is that it?” Gad asked. He didn’t want to say he was unimpressed, but…
“Just needs an infusion of magical energy.” Zooks voice said from the outside of the tent as he slipped past his brother to retrieve something.
“Uh- outside of enlisting a unicorn, how’s that gonna happe-” Gad began to say before he turned to see what Zooks had retrieved.
Zooks’ talons were currently slipped through a pair of elastic bands that attached them to a pair of flat stones, which sparked with barely-contained electricity as he rubbed them together.
“CLEAR!” Zooks shouted just before he lunged towards Gad, electric stones sparking.
Gad instinctively dodged out of the way, allowing Zooks to hit the runic circle with both stones.
The arcane symbols on the floor pulsed with multicolored light a few times. Then the ground beneath Gad’s feet began to tremble; and before he knew it, the canvas walls of the tent began to move. Like the reverse of a trap from a daring-do novel, the interior of the tent expanded outward in all directions from the circle, pushing the brothers apart as the floor’s material expanded.
“Wow. that’s awesome!” Gad said. “But… I mean you coulda just bought a bigger tent…”
Zooks smiled knowingly. “Ah, but I didn’t want a bigger tent.”
Gad’s face contorted in confusion for a second before apparently realizing the implications of the statement. He quickly flew out of the tent door to inspect the exterior.
The outside of the tent was, remarkably, unchanged. It’s sides hadn’t, in fact, expanded to fill the room like Gad had assumed. Gad did a quick circuit of the tent’s circumference before peeking back into the interior, which was as expansive as ever.
“It’s bigger on the inside!” Gad said.
“MUAHAAHAHAHAAAAH!” was Zooks’ reply.
Gad repeatedly stuck his head out of the door and back. “Dude! This is awesome! BIG TENT! Small tent. BIG TENT! Small tent. How in the world-”
“I’ve turned the interior of the tent into a pocket dimension.” Zooks responded in anticipation of Gad’s question. “Welcome to the in-tents dimension!”
Gad couldn’t help a stifled laugh at that one. “But, I mean… why? Are you gonna mass-produce these things and make a fortune?”
“Not likely.” Zooks said as he looked up at his handiwork.. “The proper ink alone cost me enough bits to buy a small house.”
“WHAT?!” Gad’s beak hung open. He knew several Griffons back in griffonstone who would have fainted at the mere mention of that much money being spent on ink of all things. “Then... Then what’s it for?”
Zooks’ eyes looked toward the ceiling while he grabbed his left forearm with his right. “Mostly just for science, but… I’d also hoped to use it for another project; the one I called you here to help me with.”
“Ooh! You have another project? Where is it?” Gad said excitedly, looking around the tent for another fantastical magical artifact.
“Uh, it’s a research project.” Zooks said.
“Oh.”Gad wilted a bit. He wasn’t keen on books; or at least not the ones typically associated with Zooks’ research.
“The thing is,” Zooks began; “I’ve reached a point in my studies where I think I can’t learn any more from just the books in the library. I need to get out into the field to test some of my theories.”
Gad gasped at that. “You mean we’re going on an ADVENTURE?!”
Zooks was taken aback by Gad’s enthusiasm. “Uh, yeah! I mean, you’re the most adventurous person I know, and it doesn’t really matter where we go as long as we get a variety of conditions-”
“I am SO IN!” Gad shouted.
“Okay, so… this is the point at which we get out of my area of expertise and into yours. I have all the equipment I need, but not much money left from my scholarship…”
“Hmmm…” Gad pondered for a moment. “We’ll have to take odd jobs along the way, probably. We’ll need an ad! Quick! Get some paper!”
Gad practically carried Zooks out of the tent and over to the table, where the inkwell and parchment he’d seen earlier was waiting. “Take a note, Zooks!”
Zooks quickly dipped his quill and waited for words.
Gad waved a taloned hand and stared off into the middle distance as he dictated. “Gad and Zooks, adventurers for hire!”
Zooks furiously scribbled down the words, then waited for more. They didn’t come.
“Uh… anything else?” Zooks asked.
“Nope. Never thought this far ahead.” Gad said matter-of-factly.
Zooks got to thinking. “Well, uh, we’ll need to specify what kind of services we’re offering…” His quill began moving again.
“Probably make sure we’re not hired to do anything evil.” Gad said.
“...Let them know where they can contact us…” Zooks continued.
“...Set a policy for trans-dimensional jobs…” Gad added.
Zooks gave Gad a quizzical look. “You really think we’ll be getting offers from other dimensions?”
Gad shrugged. “You never know. It’s best to be prepared.”
Zooks thought on that for a moment, then wrote it down. “Okay… now what do we do with it?”
Gad snatched the parchment and rolled it up. “I know the perfect place to post this; a meeting of people from all corners of equestria and beyond… a nexus of worlds where people share stories of their grand adventures both real and fictional. I like to call it; ‘Fimfiction ‘. Mostly because that’s what it’s called.”
Zooks squinted in confusion. “What?”
Gad And Zooks, Adventurers for hire!
We are willing and prepared to take on any and all adventurous jobs* you are willing to pay** us for!
*Potential services include but are not limited to: Manual labor, Exorcism/Extermination of evil/annoying creatures, Guinea pig services, Private investigative services, Magic consultation, retrieval and transportation of precious/semi-precious artifacts, and general friendly advice. Absolutely zero NSFW or outright evil jobs will be accepted.
**Payment will be negotiated per job depending on extent and type of services rendered.
Gad and Zooks happily accept requests from other dimensions, including but not limited to Crossovers, AUs, Fourth-wall-breaks and pocket dimensions, provided that the employer is willing and able to provide up-front interdimensional travel expenses or arrangements. (We accept 3rd-class accommodations)
If you have a job for us, please contact us via equestrian mail service or Commenting below. We can’t promise we’ll do it right, but we do promise we’ll try very hard!
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CTC Shipping LLC. EST 2015 Bowling Green, Ohio, USA
Dear Mr. Gad and Mr. Zooks,
We at Coast To Coast Shipping strive to deliver all freight on time. But due to a few 'issues', we have been requiring new employees at our warehouse in Nashville TN. The current positions are front entrance Security and Forklift Operator. We would like to hire you both as temporary staff. Everything from Hourly pay to Lodging will be covered plus training by our vetrean workers. Full benifits are included. Pay is up to $50/hr. If you have any questions or would like to accept the offer, please call at 1-800-445-3325.
Signed,
Thomas Harner CEO of CTC LLC.