While visiting the Western Rosière Kingdom, Nocturnus Yakōsei gets rather frisky with his best friend Mokata Rosario. What follows afterward is a night that will solidify their friendship in a very special and very intimate way.
Mokata is so cute! Nocturnus is so lucky to go to the festival with her.
I just wanted to point out something in the chapter: -Certain traits that make me more than a little doubtful that she would want to do what I’m planning to do with her. Ones that I’m sure that you’re wellaware of.”-
I think you forgot the space between well and aware.
-“Y-yes, that sounds nice right about now. T-thank you, big sister…” Scootaloo nodded, not daring to look up into her sister’s amused face.-
Mokata is so cute! Nocturnus is so lucky to go to the festival with her.
I'm glad you're taking a liking to Mokata! To be honest I was afraid that I didn't succeed into making her the adorable replica of Fluttershy while still giving her her own personality. But, it looks like I was able to accomplish that after all. Also, yes, Nocturnus is quite lucky indeed to have someone as cute and sweet as Mokata to be with him during the Sugar Pink Moon Festival.
-Certain traits that make me more than a little doubtful that she would want to do what I’m planning to do with her. Ones that I’m sure that you’re wellaware of.”-
I think you forgot the space between well and aware.
Crap, missed that... thank you.
-“Y-yes, that sounds nice right about now. T-thank you, big sister…” Scootaloo nodded, not daring to look up into her sister’s amused face.-
I think here you put Scootaloo instead of Mokata
Dammit, I thought that I gotten that cleared up.... Thank you for getting that little detail.
Mokata is so cute! Nocturnus is so lucky to go to the festival with her.
I just wanted to point out something in the chapter:
-Certain traits that make me more than a little doubtful that she would want to do what I’m planning to do with her. Ones that I’m sure that you’re wellaware of.”-
I think you forgot the space between well and aware.
-“Y-yes, that sounds nice right about now. T-thank you, big sister…” Scootaloo nodded, not daring to look up into her sister’s amused face.-
I think here you put Scootaloo instead of Mokata
Keep it up with this good story!
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I'm glad you're taking a liking to Mokata! To be honest I was afraid that I didn't succeed into making her the adorable replica of Fluttershy while still giving her her own personality. But, it looks like I was able to accomplish that after all. Also, yes, Nocturnus is quite lucky indeed to have someone as cute and sweet as Mokata to be with him during the Sugar Pink Moon Festival.
Crap, missed that... thank you.
Dammit, I thought that I gotten that cleared up.... Thank you for getting that little detail.
Sure will!