Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy.
Everypony who knew them regularly described them as “fire and ice”, along with similar figures of speech, for the two radically juxtaposed each other, nearly being polar opposites.
The former was gregarious, bold, and, at times, a little presumptuous. Her impatience made her prone to become irritable easily. As an adrenaline junkie, she always wanted things to keep moving along as quickly as possible without any interruptions. She was not afraid to voice her opinions, no matter how rude they may be. Overall, she perfectly exemplified an extrovert.
The latter was withdrawn and timid. Her patience and gentle kindness delighted others, though her taciturn nature and phobia of attention often made conversation a bit difficult, making others become irritable easily. As a demure pony, she never felt comfortable when things were going too fast. She usually was afraid of voicing her opinions, worried about hurting one's feelings. Overall, she perfectly exemplified an introvert.
Their personalities clashed, but despite the differences, they were still the best of friends. The two Pegasi have known each other for a major portion of both their lives. Their lives crossed paths when they were fillies at Junior Speedster's summer flight camp, wherefore they developed a close, platonic bond.
Over the years, however, Fluttershy's feelings for her peer grew into something more. She looked up to her friend with great love and affection, seeing her as sort of a guardian and protector. She denied her emotions at first; the thought of everypony ridiculing her for being attracted to other fillies and mares got her worried. Her efforts were futile, though, and, before long, she accepted her feelings.
Rainbow Dash's love grew subconsciously, and has yet to fully blossom. Which leads into this story, one recounting the rainbow-maned Pegasus' revelation, as well as following Fluttershy as she works hard to change her shy ways so her crush will like her more.
Sorry, everypony, I know this is PAINFULLY short, but I'll be sure to update quick!
Yay
A like start.
Can't wait for more.
Nice, but REALLY short!
The length is good for an intro but I want it to be longer when the actual story starts.
Is this your first fic? Its short and sweet, cant wait for nex chap :)
Yes, if this is a first timer, very good.
But if it isn't I still like it. 5/5 ^^
Update it fast, but don't rush your story.
Has promise. I'll withhold judgement for now, but if i had to 4/5.
Hm... you have some slight verb tense issues here and then, but still, my curiosity is piqued, especially since I love this pairing.
Hoping to see more of this.
"I know who Rainbow and Fluttershy are, now get to the story!" - Me.
The lenght is ideal for a prelude but I do hope you intend to lenghten the chapters?
This is a good start. Can't wait to see what happens when the story really gets started. *hopes the other chapters aren't as short as this one* I love this ship.
FlutterDash For the win.
That's quite the introduction, and I like how you set the story up a little first.
I just want to say though. The SAT vocabulary was a little off-putting. This ended up feeling like a formal essay, not a shipping fic. I love fancy vocabulary like that a lot (speakin' fancay ), but like I said, sort of a turn-off.
Maybe you only planned to do that for this intro? That's cool, I just don't want to read about their first kiss in a way that makes me think I'm analyzing their relationship for an essay. Do what you will though! Those are simply my thoughts on the matter, no obligations there!
Complaints aside, it looks like you put a lot of time and effort into this and are an awesome writer. I'm expecting the story to be excellent regardless of what your word choice ends up being. Tracking! <(~~yay~~)
Well, actually, the chapters are SHORTER than this.
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Nah, they'll definitely be longer; it's a goal of mine to make them 2,000 or more words each. Thank you all for your kind words!
Arendos: I'm just making sure!
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No, I realize how incredibly formal this introduction sounded—reading it back, it sounds rather perfunctory and even a bit stilted. But that was my intention for this prologue/introduction; I wanted it to sound like you're sitting in a theater waiting for the show to start when a person comes out and gives a concise background about the characters, along with the plot of the play.
I promise that my writing in the actual chapters will sound better and have a more natural flow.
Anyhoo, thank you for your wonderful praise! ^_^
FlutterDash is my favorite pair.
This has Shojo written all over. MAOR!!!
What's Shojo?
Mother of Celestia, your vocabulary is extensive...
Keep it up. Looking forward to your next chapter!
Thank you for the accolade, fellow brony comrade. As a writer, I am always seeking ways to hone my linguistic abilities. I want to sound intelligent and possess a grandiloquent vocabulary.
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Haha, that made my morning.
Vocabulary is my weakness in writing, I think. My word choice can be rather pathetic at times...
Quite the opposite for you, I can see.
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All you have to do is just read prolifically. Whenever I stumble upon a puzzling word I don't know, I always find something to write the word on so I can figure out its meaning for another time. Then, I work arduously finding a place to squeeze it into my writing (both stories and poems/lyrics). There is one key to having an extensive vocabulary that is difficult to change, and that's mental capacity and how strong and powerful your memory is. That aspect can be out of your control, though. Ever since I was younger, countless numbers of people have told me that my memory is incredibly good, some even taking those remarks and pushing them further, saying that I may possess "photographic memory."
I know I had a conclusion and point that I was trying to get across by sharing that bit of information about myself, but I cannot for the life of me remember what it was, ha. How ironic, huh?