Humble beginnings
The filly’s hooves thundered through the brush, the tangled branches and thorns of the idyllic forest attempted to pull at her mane and tail as she struggled to make her way back to her home. Her lungs ached from the attempts to quiet her breathing, the moist air of the forest carried the scent of earth and grass. Her village was close but she dare not use the hoofpaths back into it for fear her pursuer would spot her on the open path. She could no longer see her pursuer but she knew it couldn’t be far behind her. The avian denizens of the forest which so often sang at seeing her had grown quiet in the presence of such an unnatural being.
She briefly considered attempting to lay low and wait for the creature to pass but quickly rejected the thought, her olympic blue coat and white/blue mane and tail, while a point of pride for the filly, would do her no favors in hiding. She would simply have to outrun the thing and try to lose it in the tight thicket. She only hoped her aching hooves wouldn’t give out before she could reach home and the safety it held. Light filtered through the treetops above her casting golden light and varying levels of shade throughout the grove; it would be quite beautiful if she weren’t fleeing in a mad panic.
As her ears flicked back and picked up the snap of a twig behind her, her worst fears were confirmed.
It had found her.
It was close.
The filly redoubled her efforts, pushing her screaming legs to their absolute limit as she tore through shrub and vine alike attempting to escape the clutches of the creature she could almost feel on her flank. Now losing all sense of subtlety she forwent her quiet breathing and careful path-finding, panting loudly whilst charging headlong through a small creek. The presence of the creek meant she couldn’t be more than 100 meters from home, her hooves splashed only once as she galloped over the familiar water source. She could see the edge of the forest and through it the barest edge of a wooden beam she knew to be the corner of her house.
Her hooves hadn’t yet touched dry ground before she heard the thing splash it’s way through the water and saw the afternoon shadow of the creature loom over her.
She had only a split second to close the distance between herself and the rapidly approaching treeline and so made the decision to turn slightly towards a gnarled and ancient oak near the edge of the forest. Leaping over its roots that twisted upwards and outwards like grasping hooves, she barely squeezed through a gap in the offending roots and branches earning herself a scant few meters over her pursuer whose prodigious size meant it had to rush around the great oak. It also earned her a small scrape below her horn as a thorned vine she hadn’t seen scraped above her left eye. But she pressed on through the tight treeline and over the short grassy hill and finally to the threshold of her home and she knew that leap had made all the difference. Placing her hoof against the weathered oaken door of her home she drew in a shaky breath tasting the dryness of her mouth and heavy tongue and finally released her call of victory and defiance, a call that would let the beast know she had bested him and he would not have his prize today, a call that would embody the strength of this young mare and allow all to know of her triumph over the beast.
“Safe!”
Hugz finished jogging the last few meters to the large, lavish home and found his hands on his knees as he tried to find his breath. The somewhat lanky biped sweating lightly in the cool air and desperately trying not to look at the cocky young unicorn. His denim overalls were heavily stained and covered in a layer of grime.
The unicorn in question had assumed a bipedal stance with her front hooves held victoriously over her head. A stance the human often found himself in upon his own glorious victories. She was mocking him. Again.
“Behold, the great and powerful Trixie has bested you in this trial of speed and agility”. She attempted to mask a shuddering breath with a cough before shining one of her front hooves on her chest fluff and holding it away from her to casually examine. “Although I suppose there was never any doubt.”
Hugz merely lay down on well-trimmed and soft grass of the yard before waving away her show of poor sportsmareship. “You only won because I can’t fit through all those trees, if it was a long run I’d have won because I have really, really good ‘stanima’” Hugz insisted while displaying his own brand of poor sportsmareship.
“That isn’t a word” asserted Trixie.
“Is too”.
“No it isn’t”.
“Yeah it is, my mom says all good athletes have lotsa stanima” Hugz insisted while rolling onto his stomach to rest his forehead on the cool grass.
“You’re thinking of ‘stamina’” insisted Trixie as she lay herself horizontally atop her friend’s back. He wasn’t a particularly clever conversationalist but he was pleasantly warm and she was more than happy to take advantage of his position to avoid getting her coat any dirtier than it already was.
“You’re a stamina, you silly pony” Hugz grumbled into the grassy ground. He wasn’t thrilled about the very warm pressure on his back but cuddles were always appreciated and it would be more work to make her get off him.
Trixie snorted softly at his half-hearted attempt at a verbal jab before drawing a breath in a hiss as she immediately stood up in response to the hot stinging in her left eye. She hadn’t noticed the little trickle of blood that had made its way down her forehead and was now spilling into her eye.
Before she knew what was happening she had been hoisted into her friend’s arms and he was off, running towards his house down the street from her own. All sign of his fatigue gone as his unusual gait had her bouncing up and down against his narrow chest. She was surprised that he could carry her with his somewhat lacking musculature. While he was already about a head taller than most adult ponies, he was also quite a bit lighter. Nevertheless she was rushed through the threshold of his home before she could even really think about the growing ache from her forehead and the spreading warmth around the pain.
“MOM! TRIXIE’S HURT AND NEEDS HELP” yelled Hugz as he skirted through the sparsely furnished entryway room and into the kitchen/dining room dodging half unpacked boxes as he did so. His surprised mother nearly fell off her chair in surprise.
Ms. Harshwhinny had been having a pretty good day, all things considered. She had finished unpacking all of the living room decorations and furnishings, having to draw on her glut of trophies to make the fireplace mantle look more lively and spreading her meager non-competition based decorations around to give the illusion that she had other hobbies besides an unhealthy competitiveness, and it almost worked, that was pretty cool. Mayor sickle had acquiesced to her demand that she be placed in charge of the approaching running of the leaves and the subsequent celebrations, that was very cool. She had even flirted with some visiting wonderbolts who had reciprocated her advances with some good-natured lewd talk, that was EXCEPTIONALLY cool. Spitting out her tea all over her just-cleaned table and nearly falling out of her chair when she saw/heard her human son yelling about his hurt filly friend who was steadily dripping blood from her forehead onto the clean floor, that was most definitely not cool. But Ms. Harshwhinny was not the type to delay when foals needed her. She unceremoniously leapt from her chair and grabbed the first aid kit she kept hanging on a wall hook in the kitchen, before making her way into the living room.
“You will lay her on the couch and elevate her head this instant!” Ms. Harshwhinny shouted to her panicking son.
When she made her way back into the living room with a cup of water from the sink she was proud to see that Hugz had obeyed without delay. She gently moved him aside and began to look over trixie.
“Ms. Harshwhinny Trixie is fine she just scratched her forehead a little” trixie calmly explained now that her mind had caught up with her.
Ms. Harshwhinny immediately began using a cloth to dab away what would be a surprising amount of blood to anypony not familiar with the intricacies of unicorn anatomy. Trixie was correct, the scratch was hardly anything to worry about but Ms. Harshwhinny knew better than to underestimate a wound near the horn, it’s intricate structure making it a hub for blood vessels. She would of course not tell any of this to Trixie who should be kept as relaxed as possible. She leaned in and softly whispered to Trixie.
“I know that, miss Trixie, but let me just clean you up to calm down Hugz, he’s pretty concerned”. True to his nature Hugz was babbling incoherent questions about his friend and was on the verge of tears.
Trixie grinned at their little deception and calmly allowed Ms. Harshwhinny to clean up her scratch and place a small absorbant pad on the cut as well as a wrapping of gauze to hold it in place, Ms. Harshwhinny calmly explained the process to both of the foals and asked them both questions throughout. She asked trixie to keep her from passing out in the extremely unlikely case of a concussion and Hugz in the very likely case he would pass out from freaking out about his friend. Once Trixie was properly bandaged Ms. Harshwhinny left to gather both a doctor to confirm her work and Trixie’s parents in order to assuage any worries they might have after Hugz was seen panicking and running with their daughter in his arms. She left strict instructions for Hugz to keep watch of Trixie and make sure she stayed awake. The boy shook like a leaf but took to his duty immediately, asking Trixie nonstop questions about her time at her new school. With that Ms. Harshwhinny was off like a shot.
Trixie calmly listened and answered questions as her friend jabbered on constantly about nothing consequential and barely held himself together as he grew more and more panicked as the minutes without his mother’s guidance ticked by. She barely noticed his increasing panic due to his unfamiliar facial expressions and lack of moving ears to indicate mood, but the bright red face and shifting eyes eventually gave him away. It hadn’t been five minutes of this before his fear was grinding on her nerves.
“So I was wondering how somepony even gets into a school for gifted unicorns, do you even have to be a unicorn because that makes sense bu-” Trixie silenced the panicking human by shoving her hoof in his mouth.
“Trixie appreciates the sudden interest in her schooling but she could really use a glass of water. Be a dear and get her one, would you?”
Hugz barely registered her words before he was in the kitchen getting a cup out of the cupboard and filling it from the sink. That same cup was only half full by the time it reached Trixie, the other half of the water ending up on the floor, Hugz, and at least one splash on Trixie’s face as Hugz attempted to bring the cup to her lips. Trixie gave him a deadpan look before she batted his hands away with her hooves gripping the cup in her magic and draining it slowly. Out of the corner of her eye Trixie saw that Hugz was now sitting on the ground. His eyes were downcast and lip quivered. This was her first time seeing this reaction from him but it was easy to deduce that the human was coming down from his panic and about to break down. The things I do for this colt, she thought to herself.
“Hugz, The great and chilly Trixie is really cold and demands your assistance” she said, grabbing his immediate attention.
Hugz jumped to his feet and made to run towards the hallway before Trixie put a hoof out to stop him.
“Make sure to get a big blanket” she quickly added.
He nodded and hastily made his way out of the living room and towards his closet to gather the requested blanket. Trixie took this opportunity to turn on her side and scoot against the couch, making as much room as possible. She also made sure to get comfortable as it was unlikely she would be moving anytime soon.
Scant moments later Hugz announced his presence by flicking the large, quilted, green blanket over Trixie covering her up to her neck. Trixie responded by grabbing hold of the corner of the blanket in her magic and lifting it up, exposing herself to the cold, stale air of the house.
“Get in”, she plainly commanded.
“My mom said I have to keep watch over you” Hugz insisted while fidgeting with his hands, the prospect of cuddles already breaking his fragile will.
“The soft and cuddly Trixie demands immediate snuggles in order to warm her up, you may continue your questions once you are under the blanket” Trixie insisted while patting the soft cushion next to her for emphasis. Hugz began to formulate an argument but Trixie glared at him until, with much trepidation, he sat on the edge of the couch and inched himself under the blanket. Trixie pulled her friend close, resting her head on his arm as he wrapped himself around her and ran his hands along her back in the petting motion that came so naturally to him. Soon they were face to face with Hugz nuzzling the top of her head and taking great care to rest Trixie’s horn on his cheek and placing a hand on the back of her head so she couldn’t suddenly jerk her neck(he had learned early on about the dangers of unicorn cuddling). The all too familiar cuddle position had been assumed and escape was now impossible for both. Impossible for Trixie because the human had a death grip for a hug, and Hugz because he just couldn’t find it in himself to end an embrace before its time.
Trixie nearly smugged herself into the stratosphere as her plan came to fruition. Now that Hugz was performing his namesake he rapidly calmed himself and melted into the embrace. Trixie had to contain a giggle as her friend pressed his face into her shoulder and sighed, he was a good friend and everypony agreed that he was simply adorable but he wasn’t exactly known for his ability to stay calm under pressure. That was okay though, she would take care of him.
“Hey, Hugz?” Trixie half questioned and half addressed the human.
It took a moment for the rapidly calming Hugz to respond, already nearly asleep in his friend’s embrace he opened a single tired eye, “hmm?” he finally mumbled through Trixie’s fluff.
“Thanks for taking care of Trixie today, she- I appreciate it” Trixie whispered into the thick black locks of her friend “It means alot to Trixie that you care so much about her, and it’s really sweet of you to worry so much but I’m gonna be fine” Trixie sighed deeply “You’re my hero”.
Hugz didn’t respond, now being thoroughly asleep he wouldn’t awaken for quite awhile if Trixie had to guess.
“Eh? I guess Trixie will tell you later” Trixie whispered as she snuggled down further. She too succumbed to sleep not long after.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
five minutes later
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Ms. Harshwhinny thanked Dr. Full dose for her quick response. Thankfully it was as both Trixie and Ms. Harshwhinny had suspected and Trixie had only a minor cut that just so happened to be in a heavily veined area. Ms. Harshwhinny saw Dr. Full dose out the door before returning to the two foals cuddled up on her couch. It was unfortunate both the Lulamoons were out of town on business, she had half a mind to drag them back by the tails, leaving a poor, defenseless filly alone at home over the weekend was unacceptable in her eyes. She made up her mind to insist the filly stay with her until her parents returned. But for now she needed to find and unpack her camera. The two were wrapped around each other on the couch and Ms. Harshwhinny was hard pressed to think of anything cuter than the sight. Hugz had had a difficult time adjusting away from the Canterlot doctors who thought he might be some kind of alien monster and instead being surrounded by ponies who at first thought he was some giant, adorable pet. So seeing him finally having another pony to care about was a pleasant feeling if a bit sad in a way she couldn’t quite understand.
Ms. Harshwhinny leaned in and nuzzled both of the foals in her living room, neither waking from her gentle ministrations. “I’m so proud of you for making a real friend, my special little colt. And thank you for being there for him Miss The Great and Powerful Trixie” she gently cooed.
Ms. Harshwhinny took more pictures than she really knew what to do with, but her favorite one she quickly dried and placed in a frame on the mantle, packing away one of her old tennis trophies. She would have a serious talk with Hugz about obeying her orders during emergencies but for now both of the foals needed some rest, so she quietly went about turning out all but the kitchen lights and setting to work on dinner.
Yet outside the window the real monster of the forest watched Hugz with interest. Not yet little guy the creature thought to itself before sliding away into the forest, unseen by anypony
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Great start! Can't wait to see more!
9903357
Thanks, mate. I have the next chapter nearly done, just revising.
Not too bad, some paragraphs are too long and some of Harshwinny’s dialogues feel unaturals. Overall, great job!
9903381
I gotcha, I'll work on it in the next chapters. I do struggle a bit with her dialogue since there isn't a whole lot in the show to base it off of. Thank you very much for the criticism.
i.imgflip.com/1uty95.jpg
Word of advice, make some buffer chapters, like write three chapters but only post one, and then post the second when you wrote a fourth chapter, and so on and so forth. I find it helps prevent the stress of trying to constantly pump out chapters if you have that little bit of wiggle room. Also, glad to see another RGRE story here. FIM could always use more of these stories.
looks good so far, notably for a first outing.
9903795
Will do, thank you very much for the advice
9903840
Thank you very much.
9903765
I have another chapter already finished but I was told it’s a good idea to make buffer chapters. Expect more tonight or tomorrow.
I dont have any advice that has not already been given but great job for your first foray into writing. It helps keep our fandom alive ^_^
This was a fun read. You're pretty proficient at writing and I find myself skeptical that it's your first try. In any case, it was a cute first chapter. Nice and subtle on the RGRE too which I really appreciate. Naming the human in this case also helped with exposition, as it's clearly not a human name and your “anon” is young and adopted, implying he might have been found as a baby.
My only gripe is that the first chapter doesn't set up a direction for the story. You have my attention with the general quality, but you want to entice your readers with the promise of something to come if possible on your first posting. There's only one first impression.
Ps. No grammar issues were apparent on a casual reading.
9907261
Oh shit! Dude, I love your work. I really appreciate the compliments and the criticism. I’ll try and setup more of the arc in the next couple of chapters.
9907285
Oh cool. Glad you like some of what I do. By the way if you want any help or advice, I'm a pm away.
9907295
I’ll take you up on that.
going to be honest when she asked for the blanket i was going tell him to get in the blanket and cuddle and was not disapointed.
9912143
The name ain’t for show
Prettig good.
Awesome chapter.
Chapter has a lot of sense. Ponies are faster than human, because four legs faster than two. When 80 per sent are mares they will be in charge.