A Trio of Terribly Untimely Teleportations

by AkwardPlatypus

The Newcomers

About halfway between Ponyville and Sweet Apple Acres, Rhonin, the Scout, and Steve all fell from the sky. Steve landed rather smoothly, managing to get back up on his feet in a moment. Rhonin landed right on his rear, and the scout landed next to him, faceplanting.

Rhonin stood up shakily, rubbing his tailbone from the fall. He quickly looked around him. With a drunken slur still with his voice, he spoke aloud. “…Eh? Thish isn’t right…”

Scout got up, hearing a drunken voice. He was in a stage of panic after hearing it. Since he had dropped his boxes of punch on the fall (Sending the cans everywhere), he reached quickly and grabbed his scattergun off of his belt, pointing it at the direction of the voice. He quickly noticed that the man was neither black nor a cyclopse, and was infact a tanned man in robes. He still kept his scattergun pointed at him, whether he intended to or not.

Steve, just as or even more so confused as the other two, grabbed his pickaxe off of the ground. It as all he had, aside from the few pork chops he had in his bags. He looked around, noticing the world was so… Different. It wasn’t entirely cubic. Sure, some buildings were square, but many other things were curved or had angles that weren’t ninety degrees. He backed away from the other two, seeing some hostility.

Rhonin looked over at the scout, who had the scattergun pointed at him. Rhonin reacted quickly, and started making a large fireball in his hands.

Scout’s eyes grew to the size of melons, his pupils shrinking to dots. He hated fire. …That cruel laugh still echoed in his head… …That menacing mask… …That hellish contraption… He immediately dropped his scattergun and cowered at the sight of the fireball.

Rhonin hurled the fireball at the Scout anyway, regardless of him cowering. Scout ducked at just the right time, and the fireball went over his head – right to Steve. He got knocked back a ways. Luckily, his pick had absorbed some of the impact, but not much. He let out a small yell. “…What in the Nether was that for?!”

Rhonin looked at the Scout on the ground, in a fetal position, and then up at the odd man, who was very ‘square’, for lack of a better word, that he had just burned. “…What the fel?”

The scout looked up, terrified. “What the hell man?! Why did you—“

He was cut off by a voice from a few feet away. It seemed irritated and tired. “…For Pete’s sake, I can’t get no darn rest without some stupid—What in tarnation?!” Applejack yelled as she tilted up her hat to finally look at the scene in front of her.

Applejack backed up, rearing her head at the scene. She was scared, and didn’t know how to handle this situation. “…Uh… Uhm…”

The Scout, hating awkward moments, looked up at Applejack, hesitant himself. “…Uh, yo. What’s up?” He said, uneasy.

Applejack looked even more confused. “…Where… Why…?” She said, trying to communicate with her hooves, making signs and such.

Rhonin looked at the Scout, and then at Applejack. “…Where in Azeroth am I? …And what did they shlip in my drink? Poniesh can’t talk.”

Applejack stood there, astonished, confused, and afraid. She started backing away, when Rainbow Dash bolted up to the scene, Twilight galloping up behind.

“What happened? Is everythi—who are these… Things?!”Rainbow Dash yelled, getting a glance at the three newcomers.

Twilight heard Rainbow Dash as she was running back up. She arrived with the same thoughts and look on her face. She quickly pulled out her book, opened it, and started reading to find out what was going on.

Steve spoke up. “…What is… This place?” He said, marveling the architecture that seemed much more open and free than his own.

Applejack looked at Twilight. “…Twi, what the buck is going on?!”

Twilight gasped slightly and opened her eyes wide after reading a sentence. She looked up at everypony. …Everyone would actually be more fitting. “…Oh, no! I opened a rift! Ooooooh, what do I do, what do I do?!” Twilight said, trying to think.

“…A rift?” Rainbow and Applejack said together.

“Yes, a rift. Interdimensional. These three aren’t even from Equestria!” Twilight exclaimed.

“…If you’re not from Azeroth, how do you all know Common?” Said Rhonin

“…You mean English, numbnuts?” Said the Scout, still mad at Rhonin trying to burn him.

“Y’all mean Equestrian, right?” Spoke Applejack.

“No, Common.”

“English.”

“Equestrian.”

“No, Common!”

“English!”

“Equestrian!”

“COMMON!”

“ENGL—“

Scout was cut off by Steve. “I don’t think determining our language is the biggest issue right now!” He roared. “Now. How do we get back to our own dimensions, er… Purple pony?” He said to Twilight, trying not to seem hostile.

“...Twilight Sparkle. And I’m working on it…” She buried her face in her book again.

Rhonin held his head, muttering something about drinking too much.

The Scout walked around, picking up all of the Bonk! Atomic Punch cans that were salvageable after the fall.

Twilight sighed, closing her book and putting it in a satchel she carried over her back. “I have a lot to read about. I’ll figure it out later. But, for now, we have to figure out what to do with you three.”

The sun was setting, and Luna would raise her moon very soon. “…How ‘bout we find these here people a place t’ stay?” Applejack asked, having lost her fear after a short while.

“I can build my own house fairly quickly.” Steve said.

“…In an hour?” Applejack looked at him curiously.

“I’ve done it in five minutes before.”

“That ain’t possible.”

“Yeah it is. You just have to—“ He started digging, soon realizing that this place was nothing like the world of Minecraft, and that you couldn’t collect in a similar way. “…Uh, wow… Nevermind.”

Applejack, still confused, looked at Twilight. “Whadaya reckon we do, Twi?”

“…Well, it seems we have a carpenter here, so he’ll just need a place to stay for a night and a plot of land. As for the other two…” She looked at Rhonin and the Scout. “We’ll need to find a place for you to stay.”

“…Uh, you sayin’ I gotta stay at some pony’s house?” Said the Scout

“…Well, you’re welcome to sleep outside on the ground. A storm is scheduled for tomarrow.” Twilight said.

“Scheduled?”

“Yes. The flight team scheduled a storm. …Oh, I suppose you don’t… Yeah… That’s right…” Twilight said, now in thought.

Rainbow Dash sighed. She knew somebody would mention her. She had the biggest house of all her friends!
That sigh was enough to grab Twilight’s attention. “Oh, Rainbow! I’m sure you have enough room in your house! Would you mind taking one of them?” She looked up at her.

Rainbow cursed to herself. “Celestia damn it…” She spoke up. “Yeah, I guess I could take one. If they can get up to my house, that is.”

“Uh… that one doesn’t look like he weighs too much. Do you think you could carry him?” She was pointing her hoof at the Scout.

“…Fine.” Rainbow, wanting to uphold her title of loyal, swooped over to him.

“What?! I ain’t just lettin’ you carry me! I don’t even know you!” Scout barked.

“Oh, that’s right.” Rainbow landed in front of him, and struck up a pose. “I, am Rainbow Dash, the fastest flier in Equestria. The Element of Loyalty.” She flew back up in the air, jammed her forelegs under the scouts arms, picked him up off of the ground, and started flying. “Now you know me.” When she was out of earshot, she said something to him. “…Let’s get to my place before Egghead gives us a lecture.

The Scout, having been thrashing around on the way up there, chuckled at Rainbow Dash’s statement. He was still angry, but not as angry as he was moments before. He eased up a bit, realizing if he squirmed and actually got free, he would fall. Again.

“…Eh, which one ‘re you? Blocky?” Applejack said, looking at Steve.

“Steve.” He simply replied.

“Uh… Steve. My li’l sister’s got a clubhouse you can pro’ly stay in until y’ build yer own house. I’ll try to calm ‘em down. Follow me when we’re done here.” Applejack said, sounding inviting.

Steve was a bit surprised about how inviting Applejack was. He nodded in reply, and everyone looked at Rhonin.

“…So, uh…” Twilight said, waiting for a title to call Rhonin.

Rhonin pinched himself. He felt pain, so it clearly wasn’t a dream. He doubted it was a hallucination at this point. He finally spoke up. “Rhonin. Archmage of the Kirin Tor.”

“…Archmage? I’ll ask later. But for now, we need to find you a place to stay.” Twilight quickly though about what houses were left. Applejack and Rainbow Dash’s houses were taken, Fluttershy was shy, and Twilight didn’t want to put her through any trouble. And she didn’t want to put anyone through the trouble of living with Pinkie. She saw one option left.

“…Would you like to stay at my library?” Twilight asked.

Rhonin grunted. He hated relying on others. He was best alone. But, after hearing about the storm being scheduled tomarrow, he agreed. “…Ish there a place to eat here?” He said, the beer still slurring his voice a bit.

Twilight had just remembered. How would the public react to this? She was just about to say something when Applejack, with the same thoughts, spoke up.

“We got plenty ‘f apples you can take. Jus’… Pay us back.” She said.

“Applesh? Don’t you have something along the lines of pork? Any meat for that matter?” He said, not thinking about it until after he said it. They’re ponies, he thought. They wouldn’t eat meat.

“…Er.. No, we don’t.” Applejack said, looking at Rhonin with a bit of disgust on her face.

“…I guessh that’s it, then. Thank you for your offer. I guess I don’t mind applesh.” He said, still a bit irritated.

“I’ll have to talk to the mayor later,” said Twilight. “this won’t go unnoticed by the public for long. …So, Rhonin. Follow me.” She said, trotting off towards Ponyville. Rhonin sighed, and followed. Twilight used her horn to cast a spell, making Rhonin invisible to anyone but Twilight for a short time.

Applejack looked at Steve, them being the only two remaining. “…So, follow me, Steve. I’ll show you where the Crusaders’ clubhouse is.” She said, chuckling at the thought of the crusaders still. Steve followed, inspecting the land around him, finding much interest in it.

Comments

[Steel Redemption]

first to comment!...but uh listen...i dont mean to be a nitpick...but you keep spelling "tomorrow" wrong...other that that its all pretty good!

[dakingofmuffins]

STILL STEVE

rlv.zcache.com/awesome_smiley_face_poster-r51470e6c01ac4a77b09c57d8dae42110_tvw_400.jpg

[Pluma the Fluffy Dragon]

no creepers no zombies no spiders....... STEVE HEAVEN!