• Published 18th May 2019
  • 667 Views, 14 Comments

Bad pony! - AmanDash



An experimental spell goes out of control, and Twilight Sparkle accidentally ends up on the streets of a town on Earth. A passer-by notices her and offers to take her to his home for the night.

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Twilight Tales: TO THE MOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNAAAA!!!!!!! ...and back. In ten seconds flat. Seriously. I promise!

"TWILIGHT!!!" I hear an almost panicky yell and furious banging on the door.

"What could be so important this time... Yes Spike?"

" I have been knocking and calling you for the last two minutes. You have been in the basement for at least 15 hours already. Is everything okay?"

"Of course! I'm this close to completing my newest spell! If I succeed, it will be a breakthrough in the history of Equestrian magic. I can't wait!"

"Sooo... is that a no for dinner?"

"Wait! Is it evening already? That would explain the hunger."

"Twilight... Just come out already, would you? You were so engrossed in whatever you were studying that you didn't show up for lunch, which has occurred before, but it's almost like bedtime for me already. You know, Trixie and Starlight are already sitting at the table. We are just waiting for you. I have prepared your favorite daffodil and daisy sandwiches for you."

Wait. Did I really spend so much time in the basement? I check the pendulum clock on the wall. To my surprise, it shows 10 pm. Wow! No wonder Spike got worried. "Just a moment!" I yell. I arrange my books and notes, then I open the door with my magic. I join Spike and we head for the diner. Spike was right, Trixie and Starlight are already waiting there, a pile of freshly baked pancakes on their plates.

"So, Twilight, what is it you are studying this time?" Starlight asks after we finished our dinner.

"I have been studying ultra-long distance teleportation spells. I have found an unfinished spell by Clover the Clever which can be powerful enough to teleport the caster all across space, directly TO THE MOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNAAAAA! BE-YEETCH! Can you believe it? I am so excited, almost as excited as Pinkie Pie when a new pony is in town! Scratch that, I am exactly as excited! I have completed the spell already, all I have to do is trying it out after dinner!"

"Uuuh. Wow. To the Moon you say? It's impossible! No pony has ever been able to do that, not even the Princesses! You know as well as I that even Princess Celestia needed the Elements of Harmony to seal her sister there. And the Elements did just that. Luna wasn't teleported to the Moon as a body and mind. No pony ever has been able to teleport herself there and get back on her own."

"Yeah, but it still shows that it is possible. Clover the Clever pointed out that the teleportation indeed didn't need as much energy as the deconstruction of the body of Princess Luna into a spirit without a mass. That was the point where the power of the Elements were needed. He created the formulas which would allow the caster to reach the same state. He has already worked out the spell in theory. All I had to do was complete the calculations and determine the exact amount of power needed. So the procedure is this. I undergo the same transformation as Princess Luna did after being hit by the Elements so I am easier to teleport. I deconstruct my body to become a spirit without mass, then teleport myself to the Moon. Once on surface, I take a quick look around, then I return here, and I reassemble my body. I will be back faster than Rainbow Dash from a visit to Carousel Boutique. I promise. But I need your help, Starlight."

"I don't know, Twilight. Isn't it too dangerous? What if you end up as a spirit and can't reassemble yourself? If it were so easy, then why didn't Princess Luna simply teleport herself back and reassemble her body right after her banishment?"

"A good question, but worry not, I took everything into consideration. The Elements of Harmony are the most powerful magic in Equestria at the moment, but they are not fully under our control. The Element Bearers can trigger them to be cast, but their exact operational mechanism is a mystery to us, even until now. Star Swirl DID hide his results very well. He created the Elements as the ultimate defense weapon of Equestria against evil forces and made sure that no technical documentation or specifics would be found. He created them to become a power independent of the Princesses, then he cast a memory spell even on himself in order to forget the specifics. The Princesses could wield them in case of need, but they didn't know anything about the structure. He believed that no pony could be without the possibility of failure, not even the Princesses, not even himself. What the Elements do to an evil force is not decided by their wielders. It is decided by the Elements themselves. Princess Luna wasn't merely teleported to the Moon. She was banished there, pinned on its surface, without the possibility of moving herself even as a spirit. Key point is that I have enough power to deconstruct or reassemble myself, but not doing both. If you power my deconstruction spell, then I can move freely as a spirit, and have enough power left in me to reassemble myself once I return here. So would you be kind enough to help me?"

"Why don't you ask Princess Celestia? I'm sure she holds more power than me, and she has always encouraged you in your studies as I know."

"She wouldn't do it. She has been there for me most of the times, but she fears for me so much that she has talked me out of anything which she deemed too dangerous to me. She would never contribute to me deconstructing myself, but I just have to know! I don't want to stop now. Not now, when I have everything worked out, up and running. I guess that's why you figured out time traveling before me. When I mentioned the possibility of it to her, she just talked me out of it."

"Now you are right. That's the difference between me and you. I studied independently, without a Princess helping or overseeing me. I may have lacked the guidance, but I could study and experiment with whatever I wanted. No pony standing over my shoulders indoctrinating me with fears in order to hold me back from achieving what other ponies couldn't."

"Princess Celestia would never hold me back. She just worries over me."

"Yet you are turning to me, an ex-nemesis for help."

"Umm... Fine. Just help me, please. For the future. For Equestria."


"Let me run through this again. So, you are from a different reality. From a VERY different one, I might add, where magic is real, and ponies live in an organized society. You cast a risky spell in order to perform a moon landing, but you somehow ended up on our planet instead and you somehow "reassembled your body", as you put it. But how are you even planning to return?"

"I don't know! The spell didn't act as I wanted! I should have become a spirit, remaining conscious but all I remember is waking up here! Please help me! I need to get back. Bring me to your rulers or archmages so they can help me return!"

"I'm sorry little princess, but we don't have a ruler. We have a democracy, with legislation, enforcement and jurisdiction separated. Neither do we have magic, nor talking ponies. All I can offer is that you can come home with me and sleep overnight before the police captures you and takes you away to a research facility. You are the first alien to appear on Earth, so you would arise quite the attraction. And trust me, it would do no good to you. Once at home, I can contact a friend of mine who may know more about you than me. He could be of help."

"This doesn't even make sense! You are the first, how did you call yourself, "Human" I have met, yet you claim your friend knows more about me than you?"

"This won't be easy, but I must tell you. You are nothing Earth-like. Your appearance is that of a fictional character from a cartoon series. A cartoon called My Little Pony, if I am correct. But trust me, my friend Adam knows mostly everything about that cartoon. I guess that with the similarity given, he could help more than me. Now we should go home."

"Right... So... do you live far away? I could teleport us to your home, if you give me the exact location." She says, horn already glowing.

"No! Bad pony! No teleportation!" I scold her, while lightly slapping her on the scruff. I can't help myself, she is rather the height of a Great Dane dog, than an actual pony. Not to mention, I am very afraid of teleportation. Add this to the fact that she has already failed up big with it. In fact, she failed so bad that she would deserve that Pony Facepalm picture sent to her, were she to have a computer and an e-mail address. Wait. Isn't she the exact replica of the pony of that picture? I should check it out once we arrive at home.