A bard's tale

by Brotato

Ch. 3: Tea and surprises

Chapter 3

Tea and surprises

Deekin soon realized he wasn't in any harm after the bunny had been harmlessly slapping his paws against his head for a good minute or so. He continued to stare at the bunny until Fluttershy decided to "save" him from the white menace.

"Angel! I appreciate defending my home from intruders, but he's a..." she looked at Deekin for a moment, unsure what he was. After she had plucked Angel off his head, Deekin wandered away to study a book shelf and was busy flipping through one of them. "He's a friend. And I don't appreciate you jumping on my friends like that. Now be a good little bunny and go outside to play."

Angel gave her a 'Are you serious?' look and cross his front paws defiantly.

A brief staring contest later and he found himself flung out the door with it shutting behind him.

"I'm so sorry about that Deekin. He means well, but sometimes he gets out of line." Fluttershy turned her back toward the front door and found Deekin was sitting at the edge of the couch; a book in his claws. He didn't respond to her apology since he was too busy reading. At least he's nice and quiet, she mused. She looked at him and noticed he seemed tense. "I'll make some tea. You drink tea right?"

Deekin closed the book with his thumbs, saving his spot so he could read the covering. "'Equestria: A goldmine of discovery By: Gold Compass.'" He mumbled to himself. These ponies sure have odd names. He finally realized a question was direct his way. "Hm? No, master leave us to only drink melted ice water. Nice and refreshing, but no taste." He returned to reading the book.

The book itself was a guide for anyone that wasn't a pony who wished to visit Equestria. It gave tips on various things such as how to properly greet 'somepony' in Canterlot. Or bit exchange for various types of currencies he's never seen before. The book intrigued him nonetheless as it was his only connection he had to understanding this new world. With the knowledge in this book, what could go wrong?

"Fluttershy?"

"'Yes?" She responded while busy preparing the proposed tea from across the room; in the kitchen. The smell of spices began to fill the house.

"Deekin find this book interesting and most useful. I hope you don't mind if I borrow for a while, do you?"

She added a brown stick into the kettle before answering him. "Go right ahead. Um, I hope you don't mind, but I added some cinnamon to the tea."

"Sin-ah-mon?" Deekin tilted his head curiously

"Cinnamon," Fluttershy repeated. "It's the bark of a tree used as a spice. I'm sure you'll enjoy-" A loud whistle pierced the serene silence as the kettle screamed out the tea was ready. It suddenly stopped when Fluttershy attended to its need of being taken off the stove-top. With a pot holder in her mouth to keep herself from being burned, she poured the tea into small cups.

Deekin was amazed at how she could so deftly handle something meant for fingers. She placed the tea set on the table in front of the couch he was sitting on and offered one of the cups with her hoof. He took it with a single boney finger and eyed the contents. The strong smell from the spices made his nose wrinkle in discomfort, but that didn't mean he found it disgusting. While the smell was foreign to him, it was almost intoxicating. Fluttershy on the other hand, thought otherwise.

"Oh no. I knew you wouldn't like it. I'm so sorry. How about I make something not as strong." She approached to take the cup away from him.

Deekin looked up at her with panic in his eyes, not wishing to worry his host. "No, no. Deekin quite alright. See? Deekin enjoys your tea." Before Fluttershy could take his cup, he emptied it like it was a shot glass. He quickly regretted it since the tea was still scalding hot. "MmmmMmmph!" He screamed in pain with the tea still in his mouth and his cheeks bulging. He didn't want to swallow and scald his entire throat, but he also didn't want to spit it out and cause a mess. So he sat there as if everything was fine, even when his face turned red as a cherry.

"Oh... my. Are you sure you're okay?" Fluttershy continued to watch in worry as tears started to form in Deekin's eyes. He quickly nodded his head in response. "A-alright. If you say so." Fluttershy helped herself to her own cup and sat down on a plush sofa to the left of Deekin.

After a long excruciating minute, the tea in Deekin's mouth cooled down enough to swallow. His mouth felt more raw than his feet after weeks of walking. Though he had to admit, even with the painful burning sensation, the tea tasted delicious. However, right now he needed something cool the pain in his mouth. "C-cewd ah geht som cald watha pwease?" Speaking widely so as not to cause any more pain to his tongue.

"Oh, of course. Wait right there." Fluttershy set her cup down and rushed to the kitchen to ease his suffering.

As he waited on the couch, he heard several light taps on the window to his left. Curiosity took over and Deekin went to investigate, his mouth still open like a panting dog. He pressed his nose against the glass like a kid window shopping a candy store. His eyes darted around to find what was causing the sound, but all he could see were some trees, flowers, and a squirrel. He lost interest in his investigation and turned around, only to see the front door shut.

Deekin blinked several times as his kobald mind tried to comprehend why would the door open and close on its own. "Just the wind, Deekin. Probably didn't close all the way. Yes, that's it." Feeling better knowing the house wasn't haunted or anything of the like, he sat back down on the sofa. His mind started to feel at ease until, behind his seat was the sound of rolling objects across the floor. Before he could look over the cushion, a familiar pink menace decided to show herself.

"Whoo! Crit on a surprise round!"

"Wha-!" Deekin felt his life flash before his eyes as colorful confetti shot in his face, causing him to fall to the floor with a grunt. The whole room seemed to spin as he desperately tried to sit up and reorient himself. Above, he saw three blurry colorful shapes looking down at him.

"I'm all up for scaring somepony Pinkie, but I think you hurt the little guy." There was a short pause before the same pony spoke up. "Is his eyes supposed to roll around like that?"

"Silly Dashie, confetti isn't harmful. As for his eyes, I can do it too. See?"

"Either way, I don't think he's going to be mighty happy being scared half to death like that."

"Well I did critically hit him..."

Deekin finally recovered his sight and found three ponies talking to each other while hovering over his prone body. The pink pony he recognized from before, while the blue and orange one he did not. Knowing how untrusting the inhabitants have been as of late, Deekin went along with his fool-proof plan.

"Don't hurt Deekin! W-what do you want from me?" He asked, louder than he wanted to.

The blue pegasus looked at him and let out a snicker. "Wow, he sounds whiny."

"Dashie!" Pinkie Pie said in shock. "That's not a very nice thing to say."

"Well he does!"

"Deekin does not sound whiny!" Deekin stated, mustering up whatever small amount of courage he could. Which deflated rather quickly. "D-Does he?" The three ponies backed off, allowing him to stand up with his tail protectively held in his hands.

Pinkie Pie decided to put matters in her own hooves and wrap one around Deekin's shoulders. "Don't listen to Rainbow, Deeky. She just has her grumpy pants on." To her relief, Deekin started to calm down and he let his tail fall to the ground. He also pointed out his name wasn't "Deeky", but Pinkie ignored his correction. "That's better Deeky. How about I introduce you to my friends?" She pointed a hoof at Rainbow Dash. "This is Rainbow Dash. Or sometimes Dashie. Or RD, but Applejack calls her that. Sometimes, like right now, I call her grumpy mumpy pants. Though Rainbow-mmmpth!"

"I think he gets it," Rainbow Dash said flatly. She pulled her hoof out from Pinkie's mouth and shook it to get the saliva off. "Yuck!"

Once the hoof left Pinkie's mouth, she ran over to Applejack to to introduce her, but she cut her off. "Pinkie, I know ya mean well, but I swear you're gonna talk his ear off." She stuck out her hoof toward Deekin to shake, but Rainbow pushed it down.

"And you want to shake his arm off."

Applejack's eyes narrowed. "What's that supposed to mean?" She yelled, butting her head against Rainbows. They both started to fight by pushing each other back with their foreheads.

"G-Girls when did you get here?" Everypony, and Deekin, turned toward Fluttershy's soft voice. She was standing in the kitchen entryway with a wide glass of water deftly balanced on her right forehoof. "While I'm happy you're all enjoying yourselves, can you please keep it down? I-If that's alright with you..." She moved past her friends and gave Deekin the much needed glass of water, which he gave a meek thank you.

Unperturbed for failing to introduce Applejack, Pinkie pulled out a box from behind her back. "Don't worry Fluttershy, we're just going to play a nice quiet game of Dungeons and Ponies! It won't be like a party at Sugarcube Corner, but It'll be fun no matter what." She looked at everypony and said in an evil voice. "And I'm the DM!" She cackled madly.

---

Meanwhile, in the lawful outer-plane of Mechanus...

An enormous cog thousands of miles wide floated in empty white space. Hundreds of smaller cogs were around it in various sizes. Some would only move a single picometer per year, while others were spinning like tops. Standing on the cogs were creatures in various geometric shapes with humanoid limbs. From the lowest rank Monodrones, to the law enforcing pentadrones, they dotted the millions of cogs as its citizens.

In the section of Mechanus known as Regulus, 64 cogs spin in synchronized harmony. Controlled by a hierarchy, they are split into four sections. Four groups of sixteen is controlled by a lead Secundus. Within those sixteen is four more groups, each controlled by a Quarton. Finally, each individual cog is then controlled by a Octon. Among these groups, and the highest ranking modron, is Primus. A greater diety.

Primus paced back and forth, the pool of energy around his torso shifting while he looked over his large checklist. It was thicker than his enormous forearms and held all of today's activities, down to each and every thought.

Spend five minutes to read over checklist. Spend five more minutes to double-check check list. Have two minutes to admire the order of checklist...

His orderly duties were interrupted as he sensed of one of his Secundus overlords standing behind his unrolled scroll. Lowering it, he stared at the kneeling incredibly thin, tall humanoid with a long, narrow face. Only when he spoke did it dare look up.

"You dare come to me while looking over my orderly check-list, Secundus three?" He knew this conversation was going to seriously cut into his checklist admiration, but whatever his underling had to say must be important.

Its eyes opened to reveal deep-set teal eyes. "Apologies master, but this is urgent." It spoke in monotone, and with haste. "I wish to inform you of a break in order within one of the universes as of late."

Primus raised an eyebrow, but only he knew that since his giant golden mask hid his face behind a stoic expression. "A break in order? Has the legions of limbo broken loose again?"

"Nothing so dire as to have your grand intervention, master. But an odd set of events has led to a single creature to be expelled from their material realm and into the astral plane. Afterwards, he was sent to another material plane in another universe."

A scowl formed on his brow. "What to you mean 'sent'? Who or what sent him?"

"We believe an agent of chaos might be involved in this. I could sense the taint as the spell was unleashed two material days ago."

Primus said nothing and strode to the side to look out at the vast landscape of cogs and the Modron cities that laid upon them. The view always reminded him of the insides of an enormous grandfather clock. Always on time. Always precise. "This agent of chaos must be planning to use his new pawn as a ways to unbalance the very nature of chaos and order." He stood with his hands behind his back while thinking of a solution. Only one came to mind, besides the obvious of going there himself.

"We must send our own pawn to balance order in that realm. I need a new Kolyarut Inevitable crafted to hunt this creature."

"As you wish," Secundus three simply stated.

Primus didn't bother to watch his servent leave. He just stood and watched his realm work tirelessly to keep law, order, and justice across the realms. The scene brought a sense of calm to his mind, seeing everything where it should be. It was hard work making sure to follow his list down to the millisecond. To not stray from what was needed to be done.

An idea came to him and he hated for not thinking it earlier. Pulling out his scroll again, he crossed off several unworthy items on the list and scribbled a single line at the end of the lengthy parchment.

"Take time to admire Mechanus. One hour."

Comments

[Brotato]

Apologies if the description of Mechanus and its lifeforms are hard to picture. I don't have much to work with as I don't have the actual D&D books; only relying on internet sources.

[Flamester]

Mechanus seems to fit what I know of it, great chapter too, only two errors in it.

[Salacar]

An Inevitable? Those things are nasty

[Deleth]

Hehe, The amount of amusement I get from this story is directly proportional to how much of a dork I am.

[Ziggrrauglurr]

Funny roleplayer Pinkie is a go!dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/Pinkie_Pie_lolface.png

Mechanus intervention?
dl.dropbox.com/u/31471793/FiMFiction/emoticons/misc_Discord.png Everything goes according to plan...

Small OOCness of mane6? It's a comedy fic based on roleplaying... they will just get less experience for not staying in character. Try to make descriptions of situations a little clearer, I was really confused when the girls appeared Pinkymagically in Flutters' abode... Remember only Pinkie can break the 4th and 5th walls, and she can't take passangers

Just double-check your grammar please. There were several mistakes around. If you need help finding them just scream.

[Moon_Dew]

I'm not the kind of pony who does this sort of thing, but it's just too good to pass up!

OTP
Twilight Sparkle X Primus

[faurana]

"who wished to viist Equestria"

it´s a typo! fix It! in chapter 3