Red Dead Revival

by Crimson_Moon

Outlaws

Setting up camp wasn't too hard, especially since we all decided to keep most things packed up. A couple tents and Carrot Cake's cafe table was all we needed anyways, on account of us just wanting to get our bearings before heading out. Turned out we were relatively deep in according to Shy's animal friends, and it looked like it would at least be another week before getting anywhere near civilization. Still, once we did, that's when we found out about the bounty posters. No doubt another ruse set up by Miss Perfect and her two parents, Celestia and Luna.

Now, I just wanna put it on record here in writing that I don't hate Twilight for putting those two on a high pedestal. In fact, I think it a good thing! My problem is she put them so high up on the totem pole that she viewed their word above God's, and that just pissed me off to no end. Granted I'm no saint, but I'm sure whoever's reading this can agree on one thing: she's just too damn attached to her co-rulers!

Either way, the most I can say is Pride makes a good bedfellow with Envy, and one day she's gonna find out the hard way.

But enough about her! Gotta get back to my story; I'm an old stallion and my memory is shotty at best, so I gotta pen this down before I forget. Aside from running out of town with us, I didn't really introduce myself to the rest of the gang and if we were gonna be outlaws together, it was time to be honest with each other...

After pitching the tents and setting up Carrot's workstation, everypony started to wind down and enjoy each other's company, though still reluctant on talking much about the recent events.

Dutch, I'm gonna need some of that Leadin' energy right now... Arthur sighed, setting down his hat and bags. Clearing his throat, he spoke up. "Alright, listen up everypony!"

Everypony glanced at him for a moment, then went back to talking. "Oh hell no!" Stomping his hoof he tried again, but in vain. "GODDAMMIT, LOOK HERE AND LISTEN!" Suddenly, his revolver unlatched itself and shot at the glass Carrot was just about to hand to Lyra, boring a hole into the side of his supply crate. Well... That's new. he thought.

"I know y'all hardly know me, and have even less reason to trust me, but you signed on for a reason. I'm a human- I mean pony, like you, and I just want us all to work as a team." Looking at Carrot's cowering form, he felt guilty. "S-sorry about that, Carrot Cake. Once we get our first job set up, it's going straight to upgrading your supplies, you have my word."

Clearing his throat, he continued. "L-let's start with those y'all know well. Mac?"

Looking around, the red stallion sheepishly stood up, setting down the deck of cards he was currently dealing. "W-well, most of ya know me. I'm Big Mac, and well, my sister's in danger, so..." He gulped, looking at Arthur. Nodding at him to continue, he spoke with a little more confidence this time. "*ahem* Farm life can be borin' at times if I'm being honest. I know I don't talk much, so you'd never guess I would be the one to hate it."

He stomped his hoof. "But it just ain't true! I just do it 'cause the family needs me to. The one thing I yearn for- the one thing I enjoy more than farming is reading. Why, you could even ask Twilight! I rent out a book from her just about every week! And it ain't any light readin' either-" the stallion shuffled through his bags real quick, pulling out a thick red leather book. "This here is the complete works of Sir Arthur Colton Doe. He wrote Sherlock Hooves." Staring around, all the eyes looking at him as wide as dinner plates. Blushing redder than his coat, Big Mac sat back down, mumbling a small "eeyup" and smiling sheepishly.

"That's uh... Great, Mac. Never took you for the bookin' type." He nodded towards the now sheepish stallion. "Anypony else? How about you, Fluttershy?" Arthur nodded to the shy Pegasus, currently shaking within a small barrel, her pastel pink tail hung over the side like a left behind dish rag.

"I-I um, I-I'd rather not!"

"Come on, if that big softie could do it, then anypony can!" Lyra consoled the shaking barrel.

"U-um okay..." Fluttershy spoke barely above a whisper. Poking her head out, everypony waited eagerly, staring, smiling, Leering at her. "On second thought, I think I'd rather stay in this barrel!"

Lyra sighed. "As long as I've known you, you've always been like this! Get out of there!" Lighting up her horn, she teleported the mare next to where Arthur was standing.

"Eep!" She immediately ducked behind him.

"Not much for crowds, are ya?" The outlaw chuckled, receiving a firm shake of the head from her. "Not to worry, got the perfect cure-all for crowds." He patted his coat, looking for something. "Now where did I... AHA! There's the little bastard!" Pulling out a small brown bottle, he uncorked then sniffed its contents. Ah, I miss that burning sensation!

"Here," he handed the bottle to her. "Drink a bit of this and you'll be better with crowds..." Shuddering from a flashback involving Lenny and hallucinating him in pantyhose, he continued. "Trust me. Had Zecora make it for me personally." A facehoof could be heard from the Zebra in question.

Eyeing the bottle with skepticism, she gave it a small sip. Coughing from the burning sensation, Fluttershy continued drinking it, having confidence in the fact Zecora made it. "You said this helps? How?" Suddenly she got very dizzy, the whole world getting very...spinny. "Whoaaaa. Everypony looks so... Funny!" She giggled. "Y-you're right, this doessss make everything ssso easier! Thanks Arty!"

Fluttering a bit, she tried to fly and failed, landing on her rump. "Ouch! Sssssooo I'm shutterfly-oops! *giggles* I mean Fluttershy, and I jjjjjjjoined because I *hiccups* wannted to...to...do ssssomething!" She giggled, getting back up and walking towards the crowd. "Sssay Zecora, this potion is rrrrealy good!" The tipsy Pegasus grabbed Bon-Bon's face. "Can you make me more???"

She giggled, tripping for a moment before continuing. "I think it was because, like, I hated being the pretty mare who, just is a wallflower with no ffffffffight in her! Yeah *giggles*, thasounds right!" Crashing on her rump, the mare continued. "That, and that HUNK of a stallion-" she pointed back to Arthur, who was tipping the empty bottle to see if there was any left. "Asked me to! Boy if jjjjjapplemac didn't already call dibs, I think I'd just sssswoop in and take him! I'd just have to bat my eyelashes and act like the little wallflower I am when I'm not...not..." She strained, trying to think of the word.

"Drunk?" A pony yelled out, causing a wave of chuckles.

"Yeah, thassit! Drrrrrrrunk!" Suddenly, the pegasus leaned over and vomited in the grass in front of her, then proceeded to black out.

"Just what the Tartarus did you give that poor mare?" Mac asked.

"Whiskey." He threw down the empty bottle, grumbling to himself.

"What exactly is Whiskey?" Carrot asked, finishing up taping the hole Arthur put in his supply crate. "Because whatever it is, it certainly can't be healthy!"

"Nope!" The outlaw smiled.

"...and are you gonna tell us what it is?" Mac asked.

"Eeyup!" Fishing out a paper from his bag, he handed it to the red stallion who read it over.

"T-this is 100 proof! How in the-" he stared back at Zecora, who in turn, bored eyes into Arthur.

"For him only, I made this dangerous brew. How was I supposed to know he'd offer it to Fluttershy, too?!" Arthur gave her a wink and tossed a bag of bits her way. "M-mere coincidence!" She quickly spoke, seeing the eyes on her. "Betting on her tolerance? Why, that is nonsense!"

---

After Fluttershy was cleaned up and put in her tent to rest, everypony else introduced themselves as well as why they were here:

Zecora was promised a wealth of unique recipes for potions and poisons relating to pony anatomy, among other things.

Carrot Cake did it to give his twin foals enough bits to afford their college (with approval from Cup Cake first).

Lyra, though would not admit it without Arthur's approval, knew about where he truly came from and wanted to do research. Also, being an outlaw sounded fun. Bon-Bon naturally joined with her so she'd keep an eye on her marefriend.

After they all shared their reasons for being here, Arthur brought out a barrel from the supply wagon. "Alright, everypony! Drink up, the Apple family gave us some cider!" Raising the first glass, he made a toast:

"To family!"

Author's Note:

Yes, I got that poor mare drunk as hell. Don't care, thought it was cute.

Anyways, here's a new chapter. Gonna be stopping for a bit to focus on other things. Still keep an eye out though. Got some tough times ahead of me.

Give it a thumbs up/down. Comment too, if you'd like.

Comments

[Bronycommander]

Short but good. And a good Moment with lyra!