Tag, You're Not An 'It' (Spoilers for Celestia's Origin season)
Imperatrix and Princeps, the concepts of the female and male sexes, when they first came into existence... they played a game of "Tag! You're no longer 'it'!" with their siblings and even the Elders...
If Sane Reality was the type to ask rhetorical questions to His Wife, he'd ask, "Did We Just See Our Little Twin Babies Slide Down The Causality Stream To Tag Their Siblings, Which Will Retroactively Cause Their Changes To Have Always Been In Place For Mortals?"
Fauna Luster would have responded, "YES DEAR."
"Oh me first! Me!" Chaos waved, and Princeps tagged it.
Effectively turning Chaos into Discord. "Ahh but I had a perfect girl named picked out!" he said while taking out a piece of paper and a pen, crossing out a small section on the paper, and then throwing both the paper and pen on the ground.
Imperatrix picked up paper and read it, her face becoming unamused, “It says Discordia but the ‘I’ and ‘A’ are crossed out.”
"Not that one! This one!" Discord snapped his fingers, taking on curves, "Like this! Call me Eris!"
Princeps touched him him again, and poof he was once again Discord.
"Oh prunes."
"I think you look good enough to play twister with!" Said a enticing female voice.
"Oh, hello Temptation, so the other one got you?" He asked the female draconequus, a very beautiful one, the kind of beauty that made husbands cheat on their wives.
"It's actually I---a now, and I mean what I said! Wanna go play twister?"
"For you beautiful? Anything!" The two draconequus twisted around each other.
+++
Perfection Beauty hid in a corner of the universe, in fear of itself. "They'll never find me, they'll never infect perfection with their disgusting concepts!"
"Tag! You're no longer 'it'!" Cheered Princeps.
Perfection Beauty was turned into Morning Star.
"NOOOOO!!!!!" He wailed, and wailed, and wailed, until he saw his own reflection (or rather what mortal ponies would perceive as a reflection), falling for himself, “Hello there, handsome, handsome, YES HANDSOME! I AM HANDSOME! Of course I would be handsome!” Princeps looked at his brother and immediately started backing away from him, scared with what Beauty would do with a Gender, “This wanting feeling, this desire, I love it, it needs a name, I’ll call it lust!”
Imperatrix blinked. "...I kind of like that idea...Though maybe a few tweaks..." She was pretty sure that idea going too far went out of her portfolio and into I---a's.
+++
Moon and Sun were tagged by Imperatrix, and became Luna and Celestia.
The young goddesses stared at each other, and then themselves, having been touched by the concept of sexes.
"... Your butt's big," Luna said.
"... Well yours is all skinny!"
"I'm not skinny, I'm shapely."
"Well I'm not big, I'm well rounded."
"Butts don't exist yet!" shouted Status Quo on top of its chariot.
Together the twins of Sun and Moon retorted, “Well, neither do chariots!” they then resumed comparing posteriors.
Princeps of course took his sister's distraction to sneak up behind Status Quo and tag him, and so it became Currus.
+++
Given how everypony thought of Love as wild and unpredictable, Imperatrix didn't feel fear sneaking up on it. Love could be calmly grazing one moment, and madly galloping across the universe the next they told her... It was tender towards its siblings, but terrifying towards any that harmed them she was warned. There was no telling what could set it off. Currus wondered what his Parents were thinking giving birth to such a capricious concept and calling it part of Nature's Law.
But where some of her siblings were scared of it, (Princeps in particular seem frieghtened of it for some reason), Imperatrix didn't fear Love.
Imperatrix would tell them, "After all time I've spent with Love, she know it better than those who fear it and stayed away."
"Love is not selfish, but Love is patient, Love is kind, Love isn't easily angered, Love doesn't keep a record of wrongs, Love doesn't delight in the suffering of others, Love protects, Love trusts, Love hopes, and above everything Love endures." Is what she'd tell them.
"Tag! You're not 'it'!"
And in that instant, Love, ceased to an it, and became she, her name was Venus.
"... Thank you sister."
Imperatrix startled a bit. Being thanked wasn't quiet part of the game. "Uh, you okay?"
"Better than 'okay'... I feel like I've... grown, become... something more, like I've evolved."
+++
Next was another of Nature’s Fury, Natural Selection, who was watching a large single-celled organism consume another one, but it wasn’t digesting it for some reason. While being distracted by the process, Imperatrix snuck up behind and tagged it, turning it into a her, Strife. “What! Hey, huh? Well, I guess I have to work with this now!”
“Aww come on, I’m sure this is will help some creature adapt.”
“It better, or else I’ll be choosing a side, Egg!” she then looked towards a planet and saw the Fungus People living on it who had thousands of sexes, Strife glared harder at Imperatrix.
“My name is Imperatrix, and I think those are different.” Imperatrix started backing off as Strife just went back to her work, grumbling to herself. Imperatrix also tagged Imagination on the way out, but the draconequus was so into her work that she didn’t even notice, but she did feel a strong compulsion to sign her art with ‘Pandora’.
+++
"Tag! You're not 'it'!" Imperatrix called, tagging Music who became Cadenza. In the process of doing so, the song Music was singing went from a neutral pitch and tone to a higher one.
"Hmm..." Cadenza said, feeling her throat. "Different pitches and tones more common in one gender, that would make harmonies more interesting...Thank you, little sister.
"You're welcome!"
+++
A bit later, the twins stared up, and up, and UP at The All Powerful And All Unknowning And Unknowable...
"Sooo... who wants to tag that one?" Imperatrix asked not moving from her spot.
And Princeps decided to risk it first... and so the Blind Idiot God became a 'he'. And he didn't even really notice, he then gave birth to another child, almost as though to show how much he didn’t notice.
Princeps quickly tapped it saying, "Tag,you'renotit!" And backed away, Force Of The Deep became Dra-Gon.
Fear soon materialized, to bring the Blind Idiot to another one of their games, while Princeps was terrified out of his mind, the rush of adrenaline led to him tagging Hell itself, or himself, to be more accurate, then immediately ran away to his own father.
“Cute, The Little Concept Tagged Me, Now Azzy, Let’s Play Our Game! I Have Quite The Shrewd Sanities For You To Use!” the mass of tentacles and claws then grabbed many of his prisoners to form into a deck.
*Later*
Imperatrix was confused as to what the Inferno named Ocean, or Tiamat, was talking about, “Okay, back up, what is ‘breeding’ and why did you do it with Azerhorse?”
“It’s this little thing that seems to be spreading across the universe at this instance, Morning Star was crying about it,” she then saw the aforementioned Concept running towards them with an angry look in his eyes, “speak of the devil.”
Morning Star heard this and immediately stopped, “Hey, I’m no devil!”
“Just an expression, Morning Star,”
“Whatever! YOU!” He pointed to Imperatrix, “You and your brother’s concepts ruined my perfect creatures, they’re doing this disgusting action with themselves, LOOK!”
Imperatrix was rather unamused with her brother, but she indulged him and looked upon his creatures living in splendorous solitude, and they were doing something involving their lower bits, “I don’t see how this is my brother and I’s fault,” she then looked at the greater Universe, “but whatever it is it seems to be spreading. Maybe you should take it up with Venus or Cadenza? They deal with different kinds bonds and this looks like a form of bonding to me.”
Morning Star considered what she said, and decided to take her advice, “Fine, I’ll go see them, but you and your brother aren’t off the hook! VENUS!” he then ran towards Venus’ corner of existence, I----a was there as well, clearly happy by what she saw in going on in the mortal Universe (and clearly considering ways to test mortals ability to resist going too far into it). Tiamat then spoke up again, “Hey, I think I have an idea as to how to get Morning Star to like this breeding thing, but it’ll have to take a bit, I think breeding with Azerhorse did something to me.”
Tiamat felt a tap on her shoulder, and turned to see The Gale Named Whale, or rather now, Bahamut.
"Hello Tiamat... There's something I wanna talk to you about." He said with a bouquet of giant jewel trees behind his back.
++++++
Fate/Free-Will and Probability were working together. Well, more like Fate/Free-Will was carefully structuring thing along, while Probability would randomly tie them up and split them apart as soon as Fate/Free-Will wasn't looking, and Fate/Free-Will would struggle to undo the damage.
The two were so distracted that Imperatrix couldn't have had an easier time sneaking on them and touched them both at the same time, "Tag! You're not 'it'!"
And so forever more, and always had been, Fate/Free-Will was Rota Fortuna, and Probability became C----e. Imperatrix frowned at how they still weren't paying any attention to her!
"HEY!" She stamped her cute little foot.
"What?" Rota and C----e said together, then looked at each other, and laughed, until they looked at themselves, gasped, and blushed. Now Imperatrix did giggle.
Rota later noted there was an alternate universe were the primary difference was the twins had all tagged the opposite targets.
++++
At their card game, Havoc asked Azerhorse, "Are You Gonna Make A Move Or What?"
"ssssSSSsssorRy, I hAD tO BoRrow AnOtHER SaNIty."
A Random Tortured Soul spewed gibberish of having the sanity of the Blind Idiot God.
"OkaY, Go Fish!"
"I Swear To My Wife, If You Have A Slightly Ripped Pikachu."
"NoOPe, YoU HAVe An EMpeROR CaRD?"
"I Already Told You, Buddy Had Me Retire Both Emperor And Empress Cards From Our Game, On Account Of His New-Borns."
"HiS?"
"Little Ones Are The Concepts Of the Male And Female Sexes, Among Others."
"WhAAAt?"
"Use Your Sanity."
"AAAAaa, GenDEr and SExeS, sO BuDDy'S A MaLE?"
"Yes, As Am I And You."
"YeSsSSSS, WaIt, I hAVe OnE? An ALiCOrn TOucHeD Me? I aM a He?"
"Yep, Brave Little Alicorn Walked Right Up To You And Said 'Tag You're Not It', You Didn't Particularly Care."
"HalF tHE TIme, I doN't HAVe thE AbiLIty tO CaRE."
"True, But With That Borrowed Sanity, You Do Right Now."
"FiNE, Do YoU HAve AnY TrIPle HS?"
+++
Princeps and Imperatrix panted...
"How many... have we gotten so far?" He panted to his sister.
"I've... lost... count..."
"Can't catch me!" One of Tragedy's avatars mocked.
"Can't catch me either!" Another one taunted.
The twins had already managed to tag a very large number of Tragedy's 1000 nodes that made up its being... They had maybe managed to tag the majority... so Tragedy became Nyarlathotrot... and the hundred other thousand names and alias the spirit had. Though to be fair, the twins had lost count of who had tagged the most.
"How about we call it even with this one?" Imperatrix asked.
"Fine with me."
One of Key-Gatekeeper-Gateway's infinite eyes floated close to examine the two alicorn foals. Princeps flicked it with his tail.
"Tag, you're not 'it.'" Princeps collapsed to his belly on the desert sands that made up this part of Tragedy's being.
Key-Gatekeeper-Gateway became Yog-Sogthorse, and suddenly thought about how attractive Fate/Free-Will, now Rota Fortuna, was.
On looking, the inequine but snazzily uniformed Conductor and Motorman who operated the trolley through Nyarlathotrot's domain traded coins with ever shifting insanity inducing faces on them, having had their bet on who would change more of their master.
+++
Justice and Karma unlike the others, managed to spot the twins in time.
"Just do it," Justice sighed.
"It's better than delaying the inevitable," Karma said.
The twins looked at each other. "Are you sure?"
"It's not really fun if you don't run or hide," Princeps said.
"Wasting time for eternity trying to dodge you isn't worth it," Justice crossed its forelegs.
"We've got better things to worry about," Karma replied, then gave a smile. "Besides, there are way funnier Concepts to watch you tag than us."
The twins shrugged and tagged Justice and Karma, who because Justitia and P---k.
"GOT YOU!" The Witch cheered as she grabbed Imperatrix, and became The Beldam, "And I'm never letting you go! Ever! Ever! Love me! And I'll be a better mommy than your old mommy could ever be!"
Justitia and P---k had something to say about that, but Princeps beat them to it as he smashed a hoof into The Beldam's face, not changing her at all. "AGH!"
The twin flew away, the Beldam tried to give chase, but Justitia and P---k blocked her path, the Beldam snarled and retreated. " My dolls don't judge me!"
+++
As the twins as flown away from Beldam, Princeps actually TRIPPED OVER another outer concept... Sadomasochism...
"I feel like I gotta wash my hooves!" The Male Sex Himself said quickly moved along with his sister not giving the Outer Concept another look.
-
In her realm, Beldam surrounded herself with the faux comfort of her dolls and puppets.
Sadomasochism, now Abandon, raced to Beldam, waving his limbs.
"Beldam, I can be your child now!"
Beldam hissed at him. "Who would EVER want to be the mother of something as ugly as you?"
Abandon slouched sadly as she didn't even give him a second look. 'Then I will claim the most beautiful mother in existence,' he thought with inequine determination.
+++
Imperatrix growled as she tried to tag Unbreakable Defense, but his shield kept her out. "No fair!"
Unbreakable Defense smiled. "Consider this a lesson: you can't always get things with brute force."
Princeps suddenly jumped on his back while he was focused on his twin. "Tag! You're not 'it'!"
Unbreakable Defense became Turris and sighed. "...I suppose that's a lesson for me: keep my eyes on my surroundings."
The Strength, chuckled. "They got you good bro." Then it looked at Imperatrix and Princeps and went, "Innie menie, minnie moe!" And bear hugged Princeps before he could even say 'tag.' And so The Strength, became Leo.
"I guess this means males will always be stronger than females now," Leo remarked with a chuckle. Imperatrix kicked him in the knee and he began hopping. "OW!"
+++
Knowledge sat in its realm, reading another tome when Princeps snuck up and tagged him, at which point he was Eremo.
Eremo blinked, looking at his books to find the characters now had this new concept of male and female. "...Interesting, I must do research..."
+++
"Hey! Come back here!" called Princeps as the two chased Rebellion.
Rebellion stuck its tongue out. "You'll never catch me! No way I'm letting you decide anything about me!" it said, like a teenager saying 'you don't tell me what to do!'
And the Concept was actually right, try as they might, they simply could not catch it and it was proving quite crafty.
Princeps, however, had an idea and stopped, sitting while his twin chased Rebellion. After awhile, Rebellion noticed this.
"Hey?! Why'd you stop?!" asked Rebellion, dodging Imperatrix even as it spoke.
Princeps said nothing, merely looked away.
"What? You think you're better than me or something?!" Rebellion asked, still dodging the Concept of the Female Sex.
Princeps did nothing.
"Oh, so you don't want to tag me? Well guess what, you don't tell me what to do! You're tagging me!" Rebellion exclaimed, grabbing Princeps' hoof and touching it to its nose, becoming Anarchy. He stuck out his nose. "Ha!" he said before walking off.
Princeps merely grinned to his pouting sister.
+++
"Tag You're not... it?" Imperatrix blinked as Prayer, now Abbatissa continued to zip about in its, now her endless race to deliver the voices of mortals to the proper concepts (including some of the more creepy ones). She didn't even slow down, she continued dauntless and undeterred.
"Hi sister, bye sister." Abbatissa came back to give what mortals might perceive as 'letters'/'telegrams', before flying off.
Imperatrix 'read' them to find to several women praying to her.
+++
Having done their best to tag Nyarlathotrot, now the twins turned to the far more obscure and vague 'twin', or rather counterpart to tragedy, Triumph.
However, after entering Triumph's, now Fillimon's domain, the two came feeling disoriented.
"Tag him!"
"No! I tag her!"
"Wait a minute..."
Both twins double checked... to find both had tagged a pair of dummies.
+++
For being one of Azerhorse's spawn, it had been easy to tag Ponythulu, very easy, and boring, so boring that neither twin really felt the urge to recount it in detail. He Who Sleeps And Dreams Of Freshly Baked Cookies had invited them in for tea, and had happily let them tag him without any sort of fuss. And had happily waved them good-bye as they left.
"That was boring!" Imperatrix grunted.
"YOU SAID IT SISTER!" Princeps agreed.
Then an unspeakable, unknowable, incomprehensible horror descended upon the twins, it apparently lived 'next door' to Ponythulu's place. It had leapt over the 'white picket fence' and boomed in Imperatrix's face.
"TAG ME! NOW!!!"
The young goddess was so startled and shocked at the sudden outburst she could do nothing but honor the request.
The Black Goat of the Forest, now Shub-Neighurath, made 'sounds' between roars, cries, whinnies, and may other things, in triumph!
"Thank you! I have a lot of work to do now!" the moth/goat/dragon... thing, practically pranced away from the twins and went inside her 'house', slamming the 'door' shut.
"What just happened?" Imperatrix asked.
"I dunno..."
"Do you wanna know what's goin' on there?" Imperatrix glanced at the 'house.'
"... No."
"Good idea." Imperatrix said, shuddered.
A THING in yellow rags wearing a silver crown rose out of the 'shadows' 'behind' the twins... To some mortal perception, it would have been like a puppet in its jerky motions yet limp motions... It's shape twisted and bent like it was in a straight jacket.
The twins turned to see it. It let out something that was neither sound, nor breath, nor song, nor words... but somehow had presence all the same that would drive any mortal insane. And a dozen mortals across the cosmos began painting yellow symbols.
Princeps just stared up at it and tagged him.
The King In Yellow/Stallion In Yellow twisted his body in impossible angles to look at his new self.
All in all, the twins had no clue how insanely lucky they were that Azerhorse could barely be roused to care about anything over the course of a universe's entire life time... or they might have been in deep water for daring to add definition and limits as concrete as gender to his random spewed out spawn.
+++
With two more Draconequus currently in existence down this particular pant leg of time reality, Princeps was determined to one up his sister. Were they assigning stereotypes to certain sexes by apply sexes to the concepts themselves? Little Princeps didn't think about it too much. No way his sister and he would ever fight THAT badly right?
"Hi Destruction!" He waved at the Draconequus, who was doing his reason for existence as slowly as possible. (Rearing complaints from siblings who wanted some cosmic matter broken down for raw material so they could get on with creating things).
"Hi Princeps!"
"Tag! You're not it!"
"Oh! I'm male now... that's cool... I guess... I destroyed being genderless, that counts as destruction right?"
"So what's your name now?"
"Destruction. Like Mom and Dad named me."
"... Okay..." Some things just are what they are.
That left one Draconequus...
The First Born of Havoc and Entropy's children.
Princeps traveled down the world line of reality until he spotted it looking over a world on the back of a turtle.
"Tag! You're not it!"
The First Born blinked and looked at himself over calmly. "Well, looks like you got me kiddo."
"Yep!"
"So... this whole 'sexes' thing, you think it's a good thing for mortals?"
Princeps tapped his chin, "Well... not all mortals, there are still some species that are a reproducing or can reproduce without needing to exchange DNA, but me and my sister are really catching on."
"So do you think only the male sex can be heroes, is that why you tagged me and not your sister?" D___t politely asked.
"No. Doesn't really matter to me."
"Then why do it at all?"
"I think Abbatissa would say that it helps mortals relate to us."
"Ah, I see."
Princeps looked at one of the many words composed of tiny glowing brightly colored cubes that D___t incarnated upon.
"Can I ask a another question?"
"Another?"
"Well I just did."
"Oh! Heh! Yes."
"What's with all the old men giving the chosen one their quest who have to always ask if they're a boy or a girl?"
"... I honestly have no idea."
+++
At this point, Imperatrix and Princeps had begun to tire of their game. But in a bit, in for a jangle. They had more siblings to Tag in their game. The two weren't even really keeping score of who had tagged the most. That was the problem with any game that went on for too long, it turned into just another incarnation of drudge work.
"Hey Princeps, remember that regular insect swarm we saw in a jungle while we were going along the world line? And the animals all ate and ate and ate until they were so full that even more of the bugs crawling on their muzzles didn't get eaten? That's kinda how I feel now."
"Yeah... me too..."
"We'll of you're not interested, TAG you're it!" The Fool came up behind them, tag its brother, and became Puerilis, and ran away laughing.
"...I'm still not sure what he does around here."
"Me neither."
"Heh, he is a bit of a mystery isn't he?" said a purple Concept of Nature's Law.
"Ha! Tag you're... not it?" Imperatrix looked confused.
"You caught me."
"... You're already a girl."
"That I am."
"But I didn't tag you."
"But you did tag my ancestors... I haven't actually become a concept yet technically... but I'm sure we'll meet each other retroactively soon enough, I'm Magic by the way."
"Magic? Never heard of it."
"You will soon enough, on my way to the dawn of time so I can have always existed, see you soon big brother, and big sister!" the Mare waved to the colt and filly and she continued her flight to the dawn of time. The two waved her goodbye, accepting the odd and brief incident and moving on. Existence as a Concept tended to be full of weird little surprises.
+++
Strife, Death, and Self-Sacrifice/Redemption all swirled in a jungle on a planet in a galaxy so far away from a primordial Equus where giant dragons still ruled uncontested, that the light from its stars would not have reached by the time ponies invented the telescope (for the third time).
A flying prey creature and its young were cornered by a predator. Death knew either the predator would starve, or it would not starve, either way, Death would claim another faint spark of life.
But with coaxing from Self-Sacrifice/Redemption, an outcome came about that Strife was once again surprised by. Instead of the mother devouring her young to get back the energy used in their creation and fleeing to reproduce another day (as what was natural) the other instead coaxed her young ones to flee, and took on the predator herself, delaying him long enough that her young escaped, and the predator had his kill to live another day. Death claimed the small life.
"WHAT. WAS. THAT?!" Young strife said confused beyond belief.
"Myself," Self-Sacrifice/Redemption said.
"But it makes no sense! The young have less chance to survive on their own than the mother did on her own, and ensuing the continuation of the species! Why did SHE die for THEIR sake?!"
"Because she loved them," Venus said appearing next to her brothers.
"Agh!" Strife held her head in frustration. "As if I needed another Alicorn meddling in my function!"
"She was willing to take a chance that they'd find the courage to survive with her," C----e said said popping in as well flipping her signature coin.
Princeps was in awe at what he was seeing, though he felt it was kinda unfair when he learned that the males of this species died soon after mating, he was gonna talk to Strife about evolving that out, if both parents had been there, then maybe they could have delayed the predator, and the young would have still had a parent to look after them. Princeps then remembered the game and tagged Death and Self-Sacrifice/Redemption. "Tag! You're not it!"
And Death became Mortis, and Self-Sacrifice/Redemption became Pensilis.
All involved startled at the sudden chance, but Princeps was gone with a giggle before any could stop him.
"If life isn't able to survive, then what right does it have to be life," Strife said matter of fact.
"In other words, she merely wishes for life to follow the path that most ensures that life continues."
Strife startled at the young reaper's words... No one ever had ... had ever said that of her.
++++
"NOOOO!" The Stars fled, spreading out from the center of the great flash were everything began, seeking the very edges of the universe.
"Join us." Its brothers and sisters called. "Join us. Join us."
"I'm perfect as I am! I don't need a sex!"
"It is inevitable."
"Resistance is futile."
"You will be assimilated." They all smiled at it.
"Not if I can help it!" The Star shouted defiantly.
"It's your destiny, you can't escape it, there is no worldline where you do," Said Rota Fortuna.
"You probably just missed it!" the Stars retorted.
"It'll help you relate to mortals more," Venus said.
"I don't wanna!" The Stars cried out.
The Stars' family chased after it, their forelegs out stretched to give it a nice warm hug. The Stars fled so far away from the birthing reality to where colors had yet to reach, and everything looked kinda grainy too. So at the edge of time were the Stars that things looked at if they were only moving at 20 instances per-second!
It hid in a swarm inside Nyarlathotrot's domain that bordered the dream realm, it could hear Cadenza's orchestral arrangement eerily creeping up behind it. But no way they would follow it here right?
Then they rose out of the swampy ground, forelegs stretch out, "Join us!"
"Join us!"
The Stars put its forehooves to its face and let out high pitched echo scream and ran away, being slowed down horrible one of their heels broke. Then it saw its salvation, a mysterious decrepit old miller shack with a light on inside right in the middle of the swamp! Certainly it would be safe from the horde inside!
(We would like to take this moment to remind our audience that these events relatively speaking take place right around or before the dawn of time.)
The Stars fled inside (making a lot of mortals on the dark side of their planets wonder if the end of everything had come, not knowing they were off by a few trillion years).
"Hello dearie..." said a humped little old woman covered in rags. "What brings you inside my house this time of night?"
"They're after me! Save me! They want to make me one of them!" The Stars exclaimed.
"Well, we can't be having that now can we?" The humped old woman said locking the door behind her and barricading it. The old woman slipped the key into her pocket.
"Oh thank you! Thank you!" Exclaimed the Stars. "I wish to know the name my protector."
"Oh... me?... I shall tell you, but first there is one thing I wish to tell you?"
"What is it?" The Stars asked leaning in close.
The Stars were booped on the nose. "TAG! You're not it!"
And the Stars became Galaxia.
Imperatrix threw off the costume. "Gotcha!"
Princeps smashed through a window, wearing a little hokey mask to protect his face. "Ahhh! Ya got'er first!" He pouted.
Imperatrix stuck out her tongue.
Pensilis called out, "Galaxia, can you PLEASE come out before mortals start offering ritualistic sacrifices across time and space to bring you out?"
"... Fine."
-
Billions of years later
"ANOTHER zombie movie darling? Rainbow Dash that genre is older than time!"
"Yer exaggerating Rarity!"
-
Princeps and Imperatrix looked around for the Judgement, but were surprised when they heard the Judgement blow its horn. And flew towards them, and tackled Princeps. The little colt of Judgement sat up and said, "You got me! Now everything is even!"
"What do ya mean?" Imperatrix asked.
The little colt, now Judicium showed off his abacus (which Luna would borrow from him soon and said she'd return it). "Well... if Imperatrix got me... then we'd have more girls on the team than boys... and that isn't very fair is it?"
The twins looked at each other, and shrug.
"So tie?"
"Tie."
"As it should be," little Judicium said, blowing his horn.
"That's everyone!" Princep declared.
"Sure looks that way, mom and dad and... wait a minute." Imperatrix said.
---
Princeps asked their Parents, "Mom, Dad? How come..."
Imperatrix finished, "... you were 'Mom' and 'Dad' even before you made us?"
Fauna Luster said with her warmest smile. "YOU'LL UNDERSTAND WHEN YOU'RE OLDER, DEARS."
+++
"Sorry Yog-Sogthorse, we are close, but not that close," Rota Fortuna said.
The fleet of cosmic eye balls turned away sadly and sulked out of Rota Fortuna's domain.
Outside, Pandora gave Yog-Sogthorse sympathetic pat.
+++
Eons later...
Rota Fortuna's literal single parent spawn, Cardinal, continued their own work within their mother's vast network of cause and effect that ran through out all of creation.
Cardinal took note when their aunt and uncle entered Rota's domain uninvited... and the grins on their faces.
"Hello Cardinal, nice to meet you..." Said Auntie Imperatrix.
"Auntie and Uncle want to tell you something," Princeps added.
Cardinal took out a shotgun and cocked at Imperatrix and Princeps. "Don't even think about it."
"Okay then." The two Alicorns backed off.
~Fin
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This story is a riot, but at one point it says tomb where it should say tome. Also, why are some of the draconqui's names censored?
8780211
Thanks! I thought I fixed that typo! And they're censored because they were slain during the Alicorn-Draconequus war, and when a concept is unmade, they retroactive cease to exist.
8780227
Ok, got it.
8780452
They're also Draconequus OCs that Kendell2 and Persona22 have used in their pony pov series spin off writings.
8780526
Got it.