Grief

by BronyAugustus

The night

Button sat on the edge of his bed, looking at his dresser. Lined up on top of it, cast into a pale light by the moon light streaming in through the window, were three of his most valued objects.

First was the photo of him and his father in manehattan. That was a fun vacation. He smiled, his first genuine smile in several days. He remembered their snowball fight in central park. Watching a play in one of the famous theaters. Even the carriage ride. They had such a great time. Much better than he had had in some time.

Next to that was his first gamecolt. He got it on hearthswarming when he was 8. He took excellent care of it, and even though it was way out of date, he never sold it or gave it away. It was special to him. He was once almost never seen without it, but after his dad died, it had too many memories attached to it.

The last object was the most painful: a triangular case with an equestrian flag folded within. His father was a proud former member of the royal guard. He had even saved princess Celestia's life during an assassination attempt. She had even appeared at the funeral. He was proud of his dad's service, but he hated the constant reminder of his father's death.

Things had gotten pretty rough. His mom was working hard to support them both, running herself ragged in at least two jobs at any given time. But she was managing it. It helped that he hadn't bought any new games in a while.

His grades weren't doing very well. He tried, and some days he did well, but he could never put his full effort into it anymore. In fact, that is how everything seemed recently. He was hurting inside more and more by the day, and nothing but memories seemed to pull any real emotions other than sadness out of him.

His mother, bless her soul, had fixated on his grades, and was thus so worried about his future that she was completely ignoring the issues he currently having. Of course, she was working so hard, he was surprised she noticed much at all.

His eyes moved to a more unsuspecting yet much more ominous object: a bottle of rounded tablets. They were simple over-the-counter pain killers, but he knew that if he downed the whole bottle it would kill him. And that was the plan.

He was tired of feeling sad all of the time, and he had really given up on things ever getting better. So, he was going to kill himself.

He would come home from school tomorrow, pull out the suicide note he had written, leave it somewhere his mom would easily find it, and then he would take all of the pills in the bottle and lay down on his bed. That would be it. No more pain, no more grief, just sleep.

The note was largely goodbyes to friends and family. The largest section was devoted to the one thing that he had hoped for. Sweetie Belle. But now that she was seemingly in a good relationship with pip, and seemed very happy, that last hope was gone. He couldn't bare to break them up if she was happy. He apologized for fawning over her so much and wished her well in her relationship and in general.

Next was his mom. He asked her not to grieve too much over him, and to go on with her life. He told her that she was a wonderful mother, and this wasn't her fault. She had done her best.

To the rest of his friends and family, he thanked them for trying to help him feel better. He thanked them for all of the gifts, all of the time, and all of the love that they had given him. But it just wasn't enough. There were just somethings, some wounds, that were beyond the power of friendship, or even family, to heal.

He laid down, planning out the next day. He was going to school, it was monday after all, then he would come straight home. No distractions. His mind was made up: he was going to do this. Nothing could convince him otherwise.

Meanwhile, in Canterlot...

"So you see, sister, he could really use a dream intervention."

"Yes, and so can a large number of ponies across equestria," huffed Princess Luna, and she added "and I could really use a night off, sister."

It wasn't that Luna minded helping her sister, but she had a tendency of asking favors at the worst times.

"Listen, I know about your dream date with starlight."

"Wait, what! How do you know?" Luna blushed.

Celestia let out a loud laugh. "Part lucky guess. I try to keep tabs on all the ex-villains in my kingdom, and Twilight is more observative than she sometimes seems. I've known about you two dating for several weeks. Anyways, it was about the only reason I could think of for you to want a night off."

"Why is this colt so important to you." Luna baited, trying to change the subject.

Celestia took the bait. "His dad saved my life once. I feel like I owe him something. Anyway, isn't this kind of thing your job."

"Yes, but my powers do have a limit. You know very well I can't get to everypony on the edge. And even if I could, I couldn't save all of them. I can provide comfort and care, but in the end it's up to them to save themselves."

Celestia put on her pleading face "Sister, please. How often do I ask you to do something like this?"

"Whenever I have something I would rather be doing."

Celestia continued to look at her pleadingly. It was cute.

"Oh, alright! I'll see what I can do." she said, and added in a more grim tone: "But remember, in the end it's up to him to save himself. I may do everything in my power, and it might still accomplish nothing if it's too late."

Celestia sighed. "I know, I just want so desperately to help him, but I can't directly intervene. Please do your best, sister."

"I will, Sister. I will..."

Comments

[MichelleTwistaloo]

Sometimes - yeah. - Sometimes the choice to save someone or not to save them is not up to you. You can be there to comfort them, you can a shoulder for them to cry on, or someone with all the right words - easy little white lies, to make 'em feel better. - But you can't force the pills, or rope, or whatever from them. And sometimes - just sometimes, you wish you could.

I feel that Luna gets a bad rap, she's forced to endure the worse feelings, depression, anxiety, whatever else, and all she can do is try to help. - Not that she can do it for people, she can't save them all. Some might see her actions as selfish. - But she can't do anything but that try.

You've got me intrigued. I'll follow to see where this goes. And I wish luck to good ol' Button.

[Duckgame4life]

Made my account because i finally found something that mirrors my life, hope this answers my question on what to do, because I've ran out of options, ive been on this site as a guest for about a month, because reading has helped me escape the pain
Plz continue love
Duckgame4life

[BronyAugustus]

8549199
First: welcome to the community. It's nice to meet you.
Second: It's great to meet another person who feels similar. This story, I'm writing it, or at least I'm writing Button's character, from my personal experience, much of it recent. His story and mine are similar. Infact, the only major difference is his dad's military service. That, and that it's my step mom that takes care of me. Writing is my therapy. It's how I deal with my grief. I'm glad to see it's helping someone else, too.

[Unshackled_Unbroken]

8549199
Loosing someone is hard, but one has tp stay strong. Do not think of yourself, think of what others will say. Think of this, if your father died, do you think he wants you to die too? If the person you love so much were to disappear. Dont follow, cause you have a life ahead of you, take the good and the fun memories with your loved ones and hold it in your heart. Life only gives you one chance, dont loose that chance for the lost of another, be happy they lived. And be happy your given a chance to live and be loved once again.