Life as a Canterlot High Student

by King Camelot

A Castle of Magic

It wasn’t me, I swear it wasn’t. How could I have gotten the principal’s keys to the office? How could I have done graffiti art on the bulletin board? I’ve never owned a spray paint can in my life! Nevertheless, I got blamed for it and I was sent to the Principal’s replacement office (an empty classroom). That happened to me a lot, some jerk would break the rules or vandalize school property, and somehow I would get framed for it. I bet you anything I would get expelled… again.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m a great student. And I get good grades most of the time. But I was always was the butt end of jokes, and they would usually get me into trouble. I kinda made a joke out of it, that I was somehow cursed by a supernatural being, doomed to be kicked out of every school I went to. But I knew that was impossible. Magic wasn’t real. Even if it was, what did I ever do to deserve it? I finally made it to the “office” door. I took a deep breath, and went in.

“Lucas Turner.”

“Yeah?”

“Please have a seat.”

I sat down. Principal Angus stared at me with his piercing eyes, shielded by his rectangle glasses. He had the best poker face, it was impossible to tell what he was thinking. If I hadn’t been able to pull away from his stare, I never would’ve seen my parents. I was taken aback.

“Mom? Dad? What are you doing here? Did I do something serious?” I asked. I knew the answer, and they did too. They nodded slowly. “Yes honey, it’s pretty serious,” Mom assured me. “I don’t know how much I can take anymore,” She started to cry, Dad hugged her trying to comfort her.

“I don’t know what the matter with you is!” My Dad exclaimed. Dad didn’t mean that. He loved me, and he knew the truth. But there was nothing he could do. There would always be phony evidence, and whenever he vouched for me he and Mom would fight.

Principal Angus pulled out a picture, “Care to explain, Mr. Turner?”

It was a picture of the graffiti art on the bulletin board. A picture of Underfell Sans holding a broken heart, suspended in mid-air. And with me doing a thumbs up to the camera. I told him the truth…

“I didn’t do it,”

He didn’t believe me, “The picture proves otherwise.”

I countered, “Oh come on Prince. A, (that stare again) I mean Principal Angus, I don’t have any spray paint, and that’s obviously been photo shopped! I would never deface school property!”

But just as I had a counter, he did too, “I seem to recall that you have a talent for art, better than anyone else in this school. Also, it comes to me that you are a fan boy, and that you like to play a game called Undertale. Not to mention it is you in the picture.”

It was an insult to me! Whoever made that art was sloppy at it, and was doing it in a hurry. And what he was referring to was a crappy AU of Undertale called Underfell. And I was photo shopped into the picture. That was the same thumbs up pose I performed at the Yu-Gi-Oh Tournament! Whoever framed me must’ve been good at stalking me, and he obviously wanted me gone. But when I tried to point my case, he stopped me.

“I’m not finished!” He snapped, “Anyway, I have a reliable source named Brian saying he saw you defacing my board.”

Now it made sense. Brian, he hated me since day one, and was always looking for an excuse to pick on me. Once, I was walking home and he and his gang chased me all the way to Lavergills Park. I had to wait for two hours before they finally gave up and went home. Yep, Brian was the hunter and I was the prey, and he finally caught me.

Principal Angus was ready, “Well, there is no way we can allow this ruffian to stay at our school. (Here it comes) Lucas Turner, I am afraid we will have to expel you.” (Called it.)

“However, there is one thing I could do for you…”

This shocked me. Every principal I was brought up to has never offered me something. Nothing important, at least.

I looked at him, “I’m listening.”

He continued, “There is another school in a town not far from here that we can transfer you to. Its name is Canterlot High School, and it is highly suggested by other parents like yours. They basically call it a castle of magic. The school welcomes any type of student into their program and never once have they expelled someone. I believe this school may be the right one for you, assuming your parents sign the transfer papers.”

A castle of magic? Sounded a lot like Hogwarts. I was getting a weird vibe off of this new school. It sounded too good to be true, and that means it probably wasn’t. Nevertheless, my parents were asking Principal Argus all the basics, how far of a move, when can I start, all that junk. So, they signed the papers, all they needed was my signature.

My parents felt my uncertainty, “It’s entirely up to you, you know” My Dad said, “If you don’t want to go here, we won’t force you.”

Maybe they wouldn’t, but other things would. If I didn’t go here, I could never go to college and get a well-paying job. So it was basically go to this school or spend a future on the streets. I had no choice, I signed the papers.

Welp that was it. I was officially a student at Canterlot High. I was now attending to this “Castle of Magic”.

Comments

[New Fossil Studios]

Okay, I like this story. The concept is one that I myself would like to dip my toes in and the fact Lucas Turner is being framed for things he didn't do is a good way to turn into the main plot. But there are a few hickups here and there.

“Mom? Dad? What are you doing here? Did I do something serious?” I asked. I knew the answer, and they did too. They nodded slowly. “Yes honey, it’s pretty serious,” Mom assured me. “I don’t know how much I can take anymore,” She started to cry, Dad hugged her trying to comfort her.

This is the first glaring mistake, whenever you have two people speaking, it's best to use another paragraph to show another character is speaking, otherwise it makes it difficult for the reader to follow and makes the story clunky.

One more thing is the pacing, everything happened a little too fast. I'm not saying that the plot should be dragging itself across the floor, but it shouldn't be going a hundred miles per millisecond. A nice middle pace would not only leave the reader with a nice taste in their mouth, but it would allow someone who is either new to reading or don't read so much to swallow everything without choking.

[King Camelot]

9120414
I was a beginner when I first wrote this story. I had no idea what I was doing, or how to do it. And as I got into it more, I did begin to notice that the pace was a bit too quick (which is one of the things I struggle with when writing a story) Because of this, I've taken a long time to make Chapter 3, because I want everything to be perfect, a hooking story, with just the right amount of pacing.

I'm also doing a lot of refurbishing to the story. My ideas and interests shifted over time, and because of this, so has the story. I honestly don't know where I'll go with this, as I have lots of great ideas and don't know which ones to choose.

Anyway, thanks for giving my story a shot, and the much needed criticism. I promise I will do everything in my ability to make this story worth the time of you, and the rest of my readers.

[Pete100]

Honestly, I wouldn’t care.