Life's Annoying Paradox: Perception is Reality

by CDR

Ch.6 Maelstrom

Entry #6
-Date of entry; December 25th, 2011
-Date of event(s); 1,500-ish years before Nightmare Moon's banishment

"Uuuuurrrrgggg... somepony tell me I didn't knock myself out again. No, I don't think you knocked yourself out this time, unnggg. How long was I out for? How should I know? I just came to, myself. Great! They don't even bother telling the attendants anything anymore. I'm not an attendant ya hot head. Then what are you doing here? Again, how should I know? Well its not like I'm talking to myself! Naw I couldn't tell. As soon as I open my eyes, I'm punching you. We'll just have to see about that."

The zegasus opened his eyes and looked around. "Well, where the hay are you? I could ask you the same thing. Get your plot out from wherever you're hiding then! I'm not hiding anywhere, moron. Then shut up at least, you're giving me a headache. You're starting to piss me off; quit saying everything that's on my mind."

The lone pony got up out of his bed. "Tough luck dirt bag, I say what I feel like. Yeah, sure, right up until I kick you in the balls. Fat chance, I'd just freeze your hooves to the ground. Bullshit, people can't do crap like that! I don't know what people are, but this pony sure as Celestia can. Celestia my foot, come out here so I can kick your ass. I'm not hiding numnuts. Don't copy me ya imbecile. I'm so going to roast your plot when I find you. And I'm going to break all of your limbs!

The pony made his way over to the custom made mirror in his room. Considering the destructiveness of his own powers, and the fragility of most mirrors, he had shaped this one from silver and diamond. Momentarily forgetting about the soon-to-be-hospitalized jackpony hiding in his room, Hal beamed with pride at his creation.

It had taken him years to master his command of the physical elements. Air was second nature to him; he was part pegasus after all. Water soon followed and fire came easily enough as he learned to channel his anger properly. Earth had been the hardest, but he had the brute force to manipulate it once he figured out how.

"Nice mirror, now where are you? Huh what now? I said, where are you? Forget that, how are you making my mouth move? Your mouth? What the hell are you blathering about now? There you go again, quit that! I'll speak my mind whenever I want to. Not through my mouth you aren't! Since when the hell did I turn into a talking horse?! I'm a pony you idiot, a zegasus to be freakin’ exact. A zegasus? Let me guess, that's a cross between a zebra and a pegasus? At least you aren't clueless too. Oh for the love of-- you gotta be kidding me."

Here, he facehoofed. "Oh great, you can move my limbs too. Who said they were your limbs? My parents did when I was born, numnuts. Oh really? Yeah, really. Well stop hitting yourself then! Wait, wh--!"

THUMP!

He began punching himself as the two minds battled each other.

"THAT’S IT! I DON'T CARE IF ITS MY BODY! I'M GONNA KICK YOUR SORRY PLOT!"

At this he started slamming into the walls at speeds that would have broken most ponies bones.

"Wow, you are a stupid one aren't you... Ow ow ow ow ow! Not so tough now are ya? My turn then!"

Hal stopped running into things, flapped his wings, and began flying in circles within the room.

"Hurry up and hurl; I'm getting bored of you. Pffft, that's your bright idea? Here, have some of this then!"

His right hoof ignited and he slammed it into the left side of his face. "Bet you didn't see that coming, numnuts. My turn again!"

His left hoof crackled with lightning before is was smashed into the right side of his face.

The pony of two minds payed no heed to his surroundings as his powers began to rage out of control. Pieces of furniture that he had smashed through before swirled about the room in a tornado.

Bit by bit, anything that wasn't built from stone slowly vaporized in the onslaught of fire, ice, and lightning generated by the enraged zegasus. Wood ignited, burnt through, smoldered, and crumbled to ash. Metal bits arced with static as they melted down and collected into globs before freezing over and shattering as they were cast against the walls.

---

Standing outside, on either side of the door, the two guards had started to visibly sweat. At this point, they were unsure what they should be more afraid of, the pony within, or Celestia in a bad mood.

These two had, on previous occasions, had the misfortune of being assigned to guard this particular pony. The noise they heard coming from the room this time made all the past times sound calm by comparison.

"Do you think we should...?" the one on the right managed before another crash was heard from behind the door.

"Not on your life," replied the one on the left.

---

By now, not even the diamond reinforced and silver backed mirror had remained intact. Anything and everything that was in the room had been smashed, vaporized, or melted into the floor, walls, and ceiling.

"COME ON! IS THAT THE BEST YOU GOT? MY LITTLE SISTER HITS HARDER!"

Raw electricity danced a jagged path through the room as its partner of primal fire seared the very air in its wake. The physical body of the enraged zegasus was no longer visible by this point, all that could be seen holding the two together was a rapidly shrinking dark mass. A dwindling trail of fire coming from one side and a thining trail of static from the other was all that held the two small protrusions of concentrated fire and sparks that had once been forehooves.

Eventually the mass diminished in size till it winked out of exsistence. No longer joined together they circled farther about the room, bouncing off each other and everything else. Their common trajectory brought them into contact with the door to the room. Knocking it open, they careened, screaming, into the space beyond.

Not even realizing that they were now in the hall, the two masses of energy continued on their way.

*.....*.....*.....*.....*.....

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait."

"What now?"

"How do we know what the guards said?"

"Did you have to bring that up?

"Yes."

"Technically I don't know what they could have said, but creative license, and all that bull."

.....*.....*.....*.....*.....*