Horse La Horse Season 1

by Stegtorn

Episode Eight

You're in a bit of a pickle. One false move and you're taking quite a plunge down to the floor. It's a bit hard to think about what you want to do with Sunset cackling down at you.

"Hey, try punching her," Painbow grunts, sounding winded.

"What good will that do me?" you whisper into your shoulder.

Sunset is shouting something about how she's the best around to the ground. Nothing will ever bring her down. Except maybe you.

"Just do it! Jump at her."

It's the best option. You put on your best black man voice, and assure your grip on the rooftop.

"Fuck it."

"Hmm?" she says condescendingly, slowly turning to look at you.

"Ya can't stop me," you jump up, using your feet to spring off the side and at Sunset.

Colliding with her, the two of you go tumbling far from the edge; just as planned. You strike her in the face to buy yourself a second and then you pounce for your sword, scooping it up with on clawed hand. The blade feels light as a feather, slashing with this should be easy. BUT you don't want to kill her; just maim or seriously injure.

"KILL! KILL!" Dash roars.

Someone didn't have their morning coffee. You raise up your sword and charge at Sunset, hoping to cut some of her mane, that'll freak her out into submission. Maybe.

She flips to her hooves and knocks away the sword. Shit. With a swift kick you're sent back. Her horn sizzles and out comes a stream of blazing fire. Super hot fire! You think back to your Chinese girl cartoons; what could this sword do against fire? Yes, perfect. Dancing around her, you make false swipes at her. She evades all of them, up until the last. You linger a bit longer than usual to bait her, leaning forward with your sword as it clacks against the stone.

Grinning like she always does Sunset's horn begins to close. A second later a swathe of flame, coiled like a snake, comes snapping for you. Praying it works you swing for the attack.

"PERFECT PARRY!" Bow yells.

The sword 'catches' the flame and sends it spiraling right back at Sunset. She laughs, and with one head motion she causes the flames to dissipate.

"That was a good one, Anon. But not nearly good enough for me."

She runs a hoof through her mane. With another flick of her head she sends out four small, red orbs, as they get closer they spread out. They land a few feet from you, forming a line. Ok? Looks safe to walk through the gaps between them. But that's probably not true.

"Ideas?"

It's nice to have a moments rest. She hasn't hit you too much, but you're already beginning to feel the burn. Deflecting that flame attack took quite a bit of force.

"Be careful of those fireballs! THEY COULD BE DANGEROUS."

Sunset paces on the other side, smiling a little.

"Thanks for the info," you say snottily, holding your sword in two hands, hunched over slightly.

Hmm, walking by those things would be no good, but what about jumping over them? You turn on a heel, taking the risk of turning your back to her. Running to one end of the roof, you turn again, and begin running straight at her. She keeps still, waiting for you to arrive, laughing madly. Right when you would collide with one of those fire balls you hop up, like a rabbit. If rabbits looked really edgy and carried swords. Mid-air, dropping toward Sunset, your eye catches on to something.

The orbs begin shaking and getting closer. You bring your sword down on Sunset, but she dodges. Not breaking stride you slash at her again and again, nearly giving her coat a trim. You flip your sword on its side, and get a grand idea. Sunset trips up, and misses a dodge, you punish by slapping her underside with the side of the sword. She isn't cut, but she's sent about ten feet into the air. Using your noddle based powers you launch forward, catching her in mid-air for a few good slaps of your blade.

"BETTER RUN, RUN, RUN AWAY," Painbow Rash exclaims, a surge of fury coursing through you.

You're about to slap her with your blade when an explosion pushes you forward, sending you and her to the rooftop. Sunset cackles, a few feet away from you, as she rises to her hooves.

"The fire rises!" she calls back, hair whipping in the wind.

Turning over you look up at whatever the hell exploded. Oh, of course.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA," Rainbow yells.

Why would it be anything else?

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA."

Not a problem, not a problem at all. Just a GIANT FUCK PHOENIX PECKING AT A ROOF. It's about ten feet tall, fat and feathery. Big black eyes, flaming wings, and feathers, long peak. Yeah, it's a bird.

"CRAAAAW!"

Sunset laughs, and runs off behind the bird.

[Theme of Giant FlameBird]

Soul Calibur III - A New Legend

The crowd is still in a tizzy. You think you spot one stallion having a seizure. Those flashing lights will do that to you. You're sizing up this thing as it pecks at the roof, shaking it dangerously.

"Dash, you're like a bird, right?" you question here, keeping your eyes on the bird as you rise to your feet.

You back takes a lot of punishment, and right now it's hurting pretty bad.

"SORT OF."

"So, what pisses birds off?"

"Pluck their feathers?"

Fuck it man. You use your sword for support to get to your feet. Looks like Sunset is whispering something to the bird. She's climbed up to the top of its head and it looking rather high and mighty. And a little bruised. The bird doesn't look too interested in you, peaking at its giant toes, clucking, looking about at everything but you. Very twitchy little thing, less like a mighty phoenix and more like a giant chicken. It throws its head back and croaks, and then brings it back down, two black eyes trained on you. The big red peak parts to reveal the dark chasm of a mouth its got.

Rising up like a storm fires emanates from the beast. Carefully you dance around the firestorm, getting singed.

"DO YOU LIKE MY PET, ANON?" Sunset cackles from atop the beast.

"Sure do, you crazy bitch!"

You run toward the bird and swing upward with your sword, slashing it. Feathers rain down. Oh damn, you cut it! The big bird caws and flaps wildly.

"GOOD, ABSORB THAT BLOOD," Rainbow cries.

"B-but I didn't mean to hurt it, just wanted to piss it off real bad by cutting its feathers!"

Wait. Why is its blood so orange? You dodge its flapping wings, ears ringing with the sound of its shrieks. Sticking your fingers in the pool on the floor you taste a bit of this "blood".

"Anon you sick freak. You're learning!" Rainbow claims.

"Bah."

HOT, HOT!

"What's wrong? Don't like the taste of blood?" Dash whinnies with giddy.

"No you idiot. It's fucking hot sauce. This is entirely unnatural."

"GET UP ON THE PHOENIX'S BACK!" Rainbow yells as you look up at the flailing beastie.

Fuck it. You jump up, planting the sword right in the thing's side. Hot sauces squirts out. Your eyes are stinging from the aroma it's so strong. It's giant head comes for you, ready to bite you or chrispen you up. Sunset comes with the head, winking when she gets close. The beak is open and the jig is up.

"Anonymous hidden technique!" you spin on the blade, gaining momentum as flames rise, "JUMP KICK!"

You fling yourself right at Shimmer, boot aimed at her face. Slam dunk! Or, whatever. Sunset goes soaring, landing hard on the roof, making a big impact. Goddamn, don't mess, kid. You make sure to grab on tight to the feathers of the big bird. He's writhing and shaking and flapping. Hot sauce is squirting out from holes you haven't even made. IS HE BREAKING DOWN? Light shines through the cracks in him, arcing across the sky like a disco ball.

"Anon, this bird is cooked, get off!" Rainbow warns.

Well, she does have the most experience with avians. You jump off the thing and get Sunset in your sights. The sword is still in the bird, you realize as you descend. Fists will have to do for now. When you land your first jump punch Sunset hardly reacts.

You give it to Sunset, reforming her face. Or at least trying. That smug grin is really resilient.

"So, do you give up?" you ask.

"Sure," she shrugs.

You let her go and she flops to the ground. Worn out, you stagger back a few steps, feeling relieved.

"So, tell me, did you bring me here? How can I get home? All that jazz..." you huff, falling to one knee, just wanting to rest your legs a bit.

Sunset laughs. Oh fuck no.

"Don't make me come over there," your waggling finger is her one warning against your wrath.

"I don't know any of that, Anon," she says, giggling.

Sunset rises to your feet as you fall back on your ass. The cloudy sky opens up, the moon revealed. W-was it all a ruse? Shimmer looks up at the sky. You'd lash out, get mad, beat the shit out of that bitch. But you can hardly move. And she can hardly move.

A twinkling twinkle catches your eyes, and it ain't no little star. Out of the sky descends a large silvery-gold craft begins falling out of the sky.

"There," Sunset yells, pointing up at it, "at last!"

The thing begins descending faster and faster. The crowd shrieks and screams as it gets closer and closer. The hunk of metal crashes right into the roof. Giant cracks open up, chunks of stone go flying. The ground shakes under you, about to break apart. You flail a bit, trying to get steady. All the while Sunset is laughing like a big dumb idiot.

"ANON, A CHALLENGER APPEARS," Rainbow informs you.

An evil cackle rings out, a crack of thunder following it.

IN THE NEXT EPISODE:
Will this mystery fighter completely annihilate Anonymous?
Will Sunset ever stop lying?
Will the readers ever forgive me?

Comments

[gamer91]

It's Nightmare isn't it?

[MoonlitPost]

i will never forgive you

[pahnazd]

Will the readers ever forgive you? I dunno, will we?
Let's find out!