Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash's Pointless and Retarded Adventure

by AlucardTheShadow

Le Epic Epilogue

A long time ago...

In a galaxy, far, far away...

STAR WARS

Episode LXIX: PINKIE PIE AND RAINBOW DASH'S POINTLESS AND RETARDED ADVENTURE

Twilight Sparkle, the unicorn owner of Golden Oaks Library in Ponyville is on an outing with Spike to assist Princess Celestia, the royal figure of Equestria with her sister Luna. Twilight has left Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash in charge in cleaning up the library. While Pinkie is scavenging through a pile of old books, she finds an odd device to which she and Rainbow Dash discover is capable of universal transportation and...

Okay seriously, why the hell are we doing this? Every single piece of media has parodied this intro and it's just not funny anymore. I'll bet seventy dollars it was that stupid bastard, Jimmy who wrote this scene. I swear to fucking god Jimmy, if George Lucas sends lawsuits up the ass, you're paying for the damages. Ugh, Let's just cut the shit and continue with this stupid ass fic. This piece of shit intro was a waste of time.

---

Ahem, anyway it was a fine day in Ponyville, the commercial stands selling sweets, pastries and other household goods were bustling with sales, the many citizen ponies making conversation with other ponies and little foals and fillies playing with each other in the large grassy spots. The sun was fairly bright today, setting the mood for the peaceful and lively atmosphere of Ponyville's residence.

The only areas that weren't open for business however were Sugarcube Corner and more importantly, the Golden Oaks Library. Inside, a cyan Pegasus called 'Rainbow Dash' and a pink earth pony by the name of 'Pinkie Pie' were restoring and cleaning up the library to a satisfactory state after being enlisted by the library's owner, a lavender unicorn called Twilight Sparkle who had to take a trip to Canterlot along with her dragon assistant Spike to help the royal figure of Equestria, Princess Celestia with some duties and important tasks. Pinkie Pie was bouncing from shelf to shelf, humming happily as she was always happy to help her dear friends, Rainbow Dash on the other hand was clearly not having any fun judging from the bored expression on her face.

"Ugh, this is so BORING! I could be doing awesome tricks in the sky right now, but instead I'm here cleaning up after Twilight!" Rainbow Dash groaned. Pinkie hopped over and put a hoof to the Pegasus' shoulder.

"Aw, It's not so bad, Dashie!" Pinkie began with a giggle. "It's always fun to help out a friend once in a while! Like remember when Sweetie Belle got her head stuck in a jar and we spent all day trying to get her out?" Rainbow Dash merely just shrugged.

Pinkie jumped to another book pile and replacing them into a nearby shelf one by one until the very spot that the pile was occupying was becoming more and more visible to the naked eye. It wasn't until the pink pony soon picked up one more book and was about to put it back when her blind spot caught a glimpse of something that had been underneath the pile.

Pinkie Pie picked up the strange object and observed it closely, it was rectangular and coloured a dark grey, the face was decorated by many randomly shaped buttons that had odd symbols on them that even Pinkie couldn't decipher. It seemed to resemble a TV remote at best.

"Whatcha got there, Pinkie?" Rainbow Dash asked, clip clopping over to see the thing that Pinkie had in her hooves.

"I dunno! Looks like a telephone without a cord or something!" Pinkie replied, still trying to read the symbols on the buttons. Rainbow Dash raised her eyebrows at the sight of the object as she eyed rows and rows of buttons plastered on the front. She reached out a forehoof and pressed one of the buttons, Pinkie and Dash waited for seconds before coming to realisation that nothing was happening.

"Figures, It's probably broken." Rainbow Dash said, a little disappointed.

"Of course it's broken! How can a phone work without it's cord?" Pinkie Pie retorted while analysing the thing from back to front.

"Pinkie, we don't even know if it is a phone!" Rainbow Dash argued before her eyes locked onto a small circular button on the object that that a marking of a circle with a small line protruding at the top from inside the circle.

"Or maybe it's just not turned on." Pinkie theorised, seeing the same button that Rainbow was looking at and so she pressed it.

A quiet hum could be hear from the object just as Pinkie released the pressure of her hoof on the button and the thing in question appeared to be glowing.

Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash looked at each other with anticipation until the latter pressed one of the other buttons, doing so causing the object's humming to intensify in volume and softly vibrate. The pulsations were getting more tenser and tenser with every second until a bright blue light flashed at the two ponies and a massive aura engulfed both them and the device before dissipating into nothing but thin air, no sign of Pinkie and Dashie or the thing in sight.

The mares found themselves falling endlessly through a blue vortex that rippled and distorted with every second of it's worth, it felt like hours for the two when a white flash at the seemingly end approaching could be seen afar slowly approaching until they reached the binding light and were engulfed into the light once more. We will now leave you with Pinkie and Rainbow Dash's commentary on the event:

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!!!"

"And thus began the incredible tale of 'Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash's Excellently Pointless and Miraculously Retarded Adventure'." said the kick-ass narrating voice of Morgan Freeman.

Comments

[SudokuBrony]

I can see this being good. I'll keep my eyes out on it.

[SoonToBeWriterBrony]

I hope they go and annoy the Critic and he chases them out with his devil boner XD