Cutthroat Kitchen comes to Canterlot

by Coyotek4

Round 3

“And then there were two. Applejack and Rarity each still has four-thousand five-hundred bits, so this should be an interesting round. For the final round, I would like from each of you … a baked tart.”

“What kind of tart did you have in mind?”

“Any type you can think of, Applejack, so long as it’s a tart and it’s baked. Once you’re done with the shopping, you can proceed directly to creating your dessert. As before, you’ll have 30 minutes to create your dish; also as before, you have 60 seconds to shop for your dish, and that time starts NOW!”

Rarity and Applejack bolt for the pantry, each grabbing various fruits and other ingredients.

“Looks like this round is a pure test of cooking,” Twilight observes. She hears Princess Celestia chuckle from behind, rolls her eyes, and shakes her head in anticipation.

“You have 30 seconds left to shop …” but shortly thereafter, the two remaining participants rush out of the pantry and begin work on their tarts.

“No matter who wins, we’re talking forty-five hundred bits,” Rainbow observes. “I’ve never seen so much money before.

Twilight disagrees: “I get a feeling you may not see it now, Rainbow. Look!”

“Hey chefs!” Rarity and Applejack look up from their work, only to see Almond’s head and hooves sticking out of holes in a painted wall; the artwork is of a ‘queen of hearts’ playing card.

“This can’t be good,” Applejack deadpans.

“You can’t spell ‘tart’ without ‘art’; win this auction, and you can force your opponent to prepare her entire dish while sticking her head and hooves through this piece of artistic work.”

“One thousand bits,” Rarity bids.

“No way, little miss fashionista: twelve-hundred!”

“Fifteen!” “Two thousand!” “Three thousand!” …

Back and forth the bidding goes, until …

“I got forty-three hundred from Rarity going once, forty-three hundred going twice, and SOLD! Bobs, if you could kindly move this artwork towards the earth pony.”

Applejack grumbles as she sticks her head and appendages through the holes in the artwork. “How am I supposed to get anythin’ done like this?”

“You’ll just have to make it work, AJ. And I must say, it’s very stimulating to view fine art while one is cooking.” Rarity chuckles as she continues creating her dessert.

Twilight turns to her friends. “No offense to Rarity, but I hope that Applejack finds a way to win now. Think of how much good can be done with over four thousand bits.”

“Yo, chefs!” Almond indicates four tar-covered horseshoes on the table. “You can’t spell ‘tart’ without ‘tar’, either. Win this auction, and you can force your opponent to wear these tar-lined shoes for the remainder of the challenge. That might slow somepony up.”

“Well, I’m still pulling for Applejack. She only needs to bid two hundred bits to guarantee that—”

“FORTY-FOUR HUNDRED BITS!”

Twilight double-hoofpalms in utter frustration. Rainbow offers insight: “Adrenaline isn’t something you can just turn on and off. In the heat of the moment, ponies can do strange things. Strange, and maaaaybe costly things.”

“I guess all that’s left now is bragging rights,” Fluttershy comments as a pair of assistants affix the tar shoes to Rarity’s hooves.

“Yep. Whose tart will prevail? The one made by a pony working through a wall, or the one walking from station to station in super-slow-motion? Hey, you ponies finished all the popcorn!”

“Sorry Pinkie; all gone.”

“Awww.”

Applejack continues to navigate the small holes in the wall as she attempt to complete her dessert, while Rarity struggles to move from her prep station to the oven area.

“I can barely move in these things!”

“Guess you’ll just have to figure out a solution and make it ‘stick’.” Applejack turns back to her tart, which looks unbalanced and sloppy but is ready to be baked. She pulls her head and hooves out of the artwork, grabs her dish, walks over to the oven and pops it in for a few minutes; Rarity continues to struggle making it over to that area.

“You’ve got 10 minutes left in this challenge!” A few minutes after Almond’s warning, Applejack pulls her tart out of the oven and brings it back to her prep station for finishing touches. With five minutes remaining, Rarity finally makes it to the ovens. She sets the temperature to a higher level to speed the process up, but proceeds to char her tart. She pulls it out of the oven and, with superpony effort, trudges her way back to her prep station. Both Rarity and Applejack work to finish their dishes.

“5 … 4 … 3 … 2 … 1 … and STOP!”

Both ponies collapse to the ground in exhaustion, as assistants come to undo Rarity’s tar shoes and cart away the artwall. After a spell, both Rarity and Applejack get back on their hooves and present themselves in front of their dishes. Cinnamon MaJumbo descends the stairwell for one last round of judging.

“So Cinnamon, how do you feel about baked tarts?”

“I’ve always been partial to fruit-based desserts, and I very much look forward to seeing what these two have come up with.”

The two walk over to Applejack’s dish, which she explains as Cinnamon takes a bite. “I made for you a mixed berry tart, with strawberries, blueberries, and raspberries, all infused with a lemon custard.”

“Visually, it’s not particularly put together well. It looks like the fruit was just flung all over the place. The crust itself is also asymmetric in nature. However, the flavors are all there, you got just the right amount of sugar and custard, and it tastes really good. Thank you, Applejack.”

Cinnamon next inspects and then samples Rarity’s dessert. “I prepared for you a blackberry and mint tart, with a banana custard.”

“I see a little char on the bottom of this tart; it looks like you’ve burned it a bit. That’s unfortunate, because otherwise, this tart is visually superb. The flavors work well together, I do like the banana custard, but the consistency’s been compromised due to the uneven cook. That said, this was a solid effort, Rarity.”

“OK Cinnamon, the moment of truth has arrived. Which pony’s gonna leave here with some bits, and which pony’s gonna just … leave?”

Cinnamon addresses the twosome: “This was a really difficult decision, because both of you had great aspects of your dish, and both of you had technical issues. I do have to select a winner, and the winning pony is …”

…

“… Applejack.”

“YEEE-HAAA!!!” Applejack celebrates her victory, while Cinnamon consoles Rarity. “It was really close, but in the end, the slight burn on your tart was the difference. But again, great job!”

“Thank you, Cinnamon. And thank you, Almond, for a most invigorating adventure in cooking.”

Pinkie and Fluttershy both come out to thank Cinnamon and Almond for their experiences. The latter two bow to Princess Celestia, who reciprocates in kind.

“Thank you again for traveling to Canterlot and exhibiting this most unique cooking experience. And thank you, my loyal subjects, for participating in this affair.”

“We should do it again sometime!”

“Well, maybe not for a while Pinkie Pie,” Almond replies, “but I assure you that the events of this evening will be written up for posterity. I’ll make sure that all of your get your own autographed copy of ‘Cutthroat Kitchen’; I’ll even put a Jolly Roger on the cover of your copy.”

Pinkie beams. Almond, meanwhile, walks over to Twilight and Rainbow. “So what did you two think?”

“I gotta say,” Twilight starts, “for a cooking competition, this was—“

“TOTALLY AND ABSOLUTELY THE MOST AWESOME COOKING SHOW I’VE EVER SEEN!!!” Rainbow interrupts.

Almond blushes. “You flatter me, Rainbow Dash. Just how many cooking shows have you ever seen?”

“Including this one? Then I guess, uh … one. But it was still awesome!”

“Well thank you again for your enthusiasm. The next time I’m in town, I’ll be sure you and all your friends get tickets to my show.”

“Wow … I never thought I’d look forward to a traveling cooking show. You’ve sold me, Almond.”

Rainbow walks over to her friends and Cinnamon, leaving Almond a free moment with Twilight.