Why is this my life?

by GamerTag

A day at the mall

"Alright, so your job is to just stand outside and answer questions."

It was the day after Gamertag, Game Shard, Rift Raft, and Shooting Star had gone to the mall looking for jobs, and Gamertag and Game Shard were at the mall and on their first day at work. Right now the two were listening to the employee that they met before, explain what their job was.

"Our job is to stand outside and just... stand there?" Game Shard asked, not believing she heard him correctly.

"Yep." The employee answered.

"Do we have to wear costumes or hold signs or anything?" Gamertag asked.

"Nope." The employee answered again.

"But...why?" Gamertag asked.

"Because," The boss started as he walked into the room. "if ponies know you two work here then ponies will want to shop here."

"Oh, do you by any chance know the makeup pony?" Gamertag asked.

"He doesn't know her personally, but he has a crush on her." The employee answered.

"SOMEPONY LIKES SOMEPONY ELSE?!" Kiara screamed, who just busted down the shop doors.

"Hey! You better pay for those!" The boss yelled.

"Oh I will... WITH LOVE!" Kiara said excitedly and then grabbed the boss and pulled him outside the store.

"Well that was... actually not very surprising at all." Game Shard said.

"Who was that?" The employee asked.

"Kiara, she is.... a friend we have..." Gamertag answered.

Gamertag and Game Shard then went outside to their job... standing.

"I always heard jobs were boring but I never pictured this." Gamertag said.

"Something tells me this is going to be a long day." Game Shard said.

~~~Meanwhile~~~

"Alright, so our show is at 8:00 pm." Blaze explained.

Blaze, Sound Blast, and Skyler were all at the mall, they were going to put on a night show in the middle of the mall. The band was flying to where the head of the mall wanted to meet them and Blaze was explaining the plan for the show.

"So what songs are we going to play?" Sound Blast asked.

"Well, I was thinking we should play-" Blaze started but was interrupted by a certain familiar blue unicorn.

"Oh, hey guys, what are you doing here?" Shooting Star asked.

"Hey Shooting Star!" Sound Blast said, flying down to greet Shooting Star.

"Sup Star." Blaze said, flying down as well.

"What are you doing here?" Skyler asked.

"Well, I was going to go check on how Gamertag and Game Shard are doing on their first day of work, but as you all can see... nothing is happening," Shooting Star answered.

The band looked at her confused, so Shooting Star pointed towards the top floor of the mall, where the band could fly to. The band flew up and found Gamertag listening to music and Game Shard asleep on the floor outside of the store.

"What... are they doing?" Sound Blast asked.

"Probably their boss wanted them to attract attention to their shop by having them stand outside. It seems to be working. I can see the store is getting packed, even if Gamertag and Game Shard don't notice." Skyler said.

The band flew back down to Shooting Star.

"So, what are you guys doing here?" Shooting Star asked.

"Well, we have a performance at eight." Blaze explained.

"Oh, that's cool. Hey, do you guys by any chance have a manager?" Shooting Star asked.

"No. Why-" Blaze started but was interrupted by Shooting Star.

"Then, my friends, today is your lucky day! I will be your manager!" Shooting Star said.

"Alright!" Blaze said, and then her and Shooting Star walked to the area where the head of the mall wanted to met them, Sound Blast and Skyler just stood there and watched them walk away.

"Doesn't Shooting Star have a job at the library?" Skyler asked.

"Yeah." Sound Blast said.

"And didn't Gamertag say something about Shooting Star and being a manager?" Skyler asked.

"I think so..." Sound Blast said.

~~~FLASHBACK~~~

"I remember a long time ago, John, Kiara, Rift Raft, and I were a band." Gamertag said.

"Oh really?! That's awesome!" Blaze said.

"What about Shooting Star?" Skyler asked.

"She actually is the one who broke the band. You see, she wanted to be the manager but the power kind of went to her head and it ended badly..." Gamertag explained.

~~~END OF FLASHBACK~~~

Skyler and Sound Blast looked at each other worryingly and then quickly flew off towards Blaze and Shooting Star.

~~~Meanwhile~~~

"Now, before you take part in the 'Kiara's four step plan on getting somepony to like you' I need you to make an agreement with me."

Kiara had brought the boss right outside a suit store. She was explaining the rules she had set before Kiara would help him.

"Why do you have rules for this?" The boss asked.

"Reasons...." Kiara answered.

"Alright, well what are the rules?" The boss asked.

"That if you are unhappy after the end result that you will not become a crazy maniac who swears vengeance on the pony or the ponies friends." Kiara said bluntly.

The boss stared at her with wide eyes and then said, "Should I ask why those are rules?"

"No, So do you agree or not?"

"Alright, I guess?" The boss said hesitantly.

"Great! Now, step one, get dressed up!" Kiara said with a smile.

"I was guessing that was step one, sense we are outside a suit store," The boss said.

The boss and Kiara walked in. Once they were in, Kiara yelled, "I NEED THE BEST CHICK MAGNET SUIT!"

The boss blushed and looked at the ground, trying not to make eye contact with anyone.

"Okay!" Somepony yelled and threw a bag at Kiara.

Without even looking inside the bag, Kiara yelled, "Thank you!" and left with the boss.

~~~Back at the Game Store~~~

An hour has passed and nothing had happened yet, Game Shard was still asleep and the boss was still gone.... somewhere.

Gamertag finally took off her headphones and looked away from her phone, to see a crowd of ponies inside the store.

"HOLY CRAP!" Gamertag yelled, "The boss's plan worked!"

Gamertag then looked at a sleeping Game Shard and an evil grin formed on her face.

Gamertag then left and went into another store and bought a bucket. She then went into the mare's bathroom and filled the bucket with cold water. Gamertag then walked right up to the sleeping Game Shard, right when she was about to pour the bucket, she heard a voice.

"Hey Gamert- what are you doing?" The voice asked.

The voice scared Gamertag and she dropped the bucket onto Game Shard.

The plan worked in waking Game Shard up, just not how Gamertag had planned. The bucket ended up hitting Game Shard on the head, waking her up, and then all the cold water fell onto her.

"WHAT THE?! GAMERTAG! OH CELESTIA SO COLD! GAMERTAG WHEN I GET BACK YOU ARE SO DEAD!" Game Shard yelled and then flew towards the mare's bathroom to dry off.

Once Game Shard was out of sight, Gamertag turned to the voice that scared her, the voice belonged to John.

"Oh, hey John!" Gamertag said.

"Heyyy.... should I even ask?"

"No,"

"I thought so. Anyway, how's work?" John asked.

"Very, very boring." Gamertag said.

"Well, you better get used to it, because most jobs are boring." John said.

"John, they make us just stand here." Gamertag explained.

"They do? That is... an odd job."

"You're telling me. So, why are you here?" Gamertag asked.

"Well, I came here with Rift Raft to check on you and Game Shard, but Rift Raft ran off, say she had business to take care of, so now I am here." John explained.

"Oh, do you know where Kiara is?" Gamertag asked.

"Yeah, at home." John said, a little worried why she asked.

"Then why did she break down the door this morning and kidnap our boss so he could ask somepony out?" Gamertag asked.

John stared at her with wide eyes and then flew off.

"Hey! Where are you going?!" Gamertag yelled.

"To find Kiara! Before she makes another Trex!" John yelled back.

~~~Meanwhile~~~

The band was setting up on stage, they hadn't heard from Shooting Star sense they left the head of the mall's office.

"Hey Blaze," Skyler started, "I don't know it's a good idea to let Shooting Star be our manager,"

"Why?" Blaze asked.

"Well, according to Gamertag, Shooting Star is known to have the power go to her head..." Skyler explained.

"Oh yeah, I remember that story. But that was a long time ago, she is probably better now." Blaze said.

"How can you be so sure?" Skyler asked, a little annoyed that Blaze wouldn't listen to her.

Blaze got a little angry too, but before the two started fighting, Sound Blast interrupted,

"We'll see when Shooting Star gets back here."

"Yeah." Blaze and Skyler said in unison and went back to working on setting up.

"Speaking of Shooting Star, where is she?" Skyler asked.

~~~Meanwhile~~~

"So, you're saying that my clients could be the mascots of this place, if they wear giant shrimp suits while playing tonight?" Shooting Star asked.

"Yes, and you all will be payed a ton of money, so what do you think?" The head of the mall asked.

"I think-" Shooting Star started but was interrupted by the door being slammed open and then shut.

"THIS IS REVENGE FOR ALMOST RAPEING GAME SHARD!" Rift Raft yelled and then threw one of the chairs from the office outside the door and to one of the stallions that chased them yesterday.

"RIFT RAFT! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Shooting Star yelled.

"YOU KNOW THIS MARE?!" The head of the mall yelled.

"SHOOTING STAR! PERFECT! QUICK HAND ME SOMETHING TO HIT THESE GUYS WITH!" Rift Raft yelled.

"I AM NOT GOING TO HELP YOU BEAT UP A GANG OF STALLIONS!" Shooting Star yelled back.

"FINE!" Rift Raft yelled and then grabbed the first thing she felt. Unfortunately, the first thing she felt was the head of the mall, who she then threw outside the door and at the gang of ponies. Rift Raft then locked the door, leaving her and Shooting Star trapped inside the office.

"RIFT RAFT! YOU JUST THREW THE HEAD OF THE MALL OUTSIDE HIS OWN OFFICE AND AT A GANG OF PONIES!" Shooting Star yelled, panicking.

"Well duh, I mean, how could it not be him? Chairs don't scream like little fillies when thrown." Rift Raft said.

Shooting Star yelled in frustration and then shouted, "YOU ARE IMPOSSIBLE! WHAT DO WE DO NOW?! IF WE GO OUTSIDE WE WILL PROBABLY BE ARRESTED!"

"I could take ‘em."

"THAT'S NOT THE POINT!" Shooting Star yelled.

"Well, since we're alone here, there is always something I wanted to tell you..." Rift Raft said.

~~~Meanwhile~~~

"Alright, time for step four, ask the pony out!" Kiara said happily.

Kiara and the boss had already almost finished all of Kiara's steps, the second step was to get flowers, which again was wrapped and was thrown to Kiara by a pony who had the same voice as the pony in the suit store. Step three was to plan the date, which they asked for tickets to a show, the pony that gave it to them threw it at them and had the same voice.

"Alright..." The boss said and then walked into the makeup store, when he got out, he had a happy look on his face.

"She said yes!" The boss said happily.

"WHOO HOO! Alright! Now let's get you ready and set up your date!" Kiara said.

~~~Later~~~

"Alright, come out!" Kiara said excitedly.

"I don't want to..." The boss said.

"C'mon, how bad can it be?" Kiara said encouragingly.

The boss sighed and then walked out. Kiara was expecting to see the boss wearing a suit but instead he was wearing a farm suit with magnets tied to it.

"WHAT ARE YOU WEARING?!" Kiara yelled.

"THE SUIT YOU BOUGHT!" The boss yelled back.

"Well, you said you wanted a chick magnet..." a voice said.

Kiara turned around to find Moonshine standing there.

"MOONSHINE?! YOU WERE THE ONE WHO GAVE US ALL THIS STUFF?!" Kiara yelled.

"Yep!" Moonshine said.

Kiara then opened the wrapped flowers to find flowers made out of bendy straws. Kiara then also looked at the theater tickets they bought and...

"BARNEY THE DINOSAUR TICKETS?!" Kiara yelled.

"Yeah! And they were almost sold out too!" Moonshine said with a grin.

"...Moonshine.... I AM GOING TO KILL-" Kiara started but was interrupted by a voice.

"KIARA! There you are!" The voice said.

Everypony turned to see John flying towards them.

"John? You were looking for me?" Kiara asked.

"Well yeah, I don't want you to do something stupid again. Now c'mon let's go to Blaze, Sound Blast, and Skyler's concert." John said, leading Kiara there with his wing.

John then whispered, "I also didn't want you to get hurt," And then looked forwards towards the stage, Kiara looked at John and smiled.

"WAIT! WHAT ABOUT MY DATE?!" The boss yelled.

"I CAN HELP YOU!" Moonshine said excitedly.

"Oh, boy..." The boss mumbled

~~~Meanwhile~~~

"YOU TWO!"

Gamertag and Game Shard were standing outside, still bored, when the employee came running out of the shop.

"I NEED YOUR GUY'S HELP! I CAN'T TAKE CARE OF ALL OF THIS ON MY OWN!" The employee yelled and then ran back in. Gamertag and Game Shard looked at each other and then ran in after him.

The store was a mess, the line went through the whole store, it wasn't even really a line anymore.

"Okay, Game Shard, you take care of all the customers that want to buy something, and Gamertag you take care of the ones asking questions. I am going to try to find the boss." The employee explained and then ran out of the store.

"...He just left two new employees in charge of a mob of ponies." Game Shad said dryly.

"Yep..." Gamertag said, and then the two went to their places on the counter.

"Alright, Who's next?" Game Shard asked.

At that moment a bunch of ponies started yelling and they all threw the games they wanted into the counter and their credit cards. So Game Shard became a machine, she had no idea what card or game she gave to who but she didn't care, she kept going.

"Alright, what are your questions?" Gamertag asked.

Right then, a bunch of ponies stared yelling questions. So Gamertag gave the ponies random answers.

~~~Later~~~

Gamertag and Game Shard were getting ready to leave when the employee stopped them.

"Hey guys, great job getting everypony out, but.... I got a lot of complaints, like one said, 'Hey, so I asked Gamertag which starter to pick for Pokemon Y and she told me I have to beat the level nine dungeon lord, so how do I do that?' And another one was, 'Hey, this is Spike the dragon, I just wanted to ask why my credit card has the name Caramel and why, when I bought a super ponies game, I got this ripoff called 'The Avengers’." The employee said.

Gamertag and Game Shard looked at each other, and then Gamertag ran out of the store. Game Shard was going to follow her but the employee stopped her.

"Why did they ask that?!" The employee asked.

"Here's why, because you left two new employees with no training other than standing outside, to take care of a mob." Game Shard answered and followed after Gamertag.

Game Shard found Gamertag in the middle of the mall, looking at a stage.

"Hey, Blaze, Sound Blast, and Skyler are going to perform here, and I see John and Kiara over there, let's go join them." Gamertag said.

And so Game Shard and Gamertag sat down next to John and Kiara to watch the band perform.

~~~Meanwhile~~~

"Fillies and gentlecolts, please stomp your hooves on the floor for-" The announcer started but was interrupted by Blaze closing the part of the curtain she had open to look at the crowd.

"Well, looks like it's time." Blaze said.

"But what about Shooting Star?" Sound Blast asked.

"We'll see her later." Blaze said.

"Actually I know where she is..." Skyler said, look to her left of back stage which was opened.

"See? She's fine. Let's go!" Blaze said and the band went on stage.

Right when they were about to play, they heard yelling.

"GET BACK HERE!!!!" A stallion yelled.

"Y'know this is getting kind of old." Rift Raft said.

"SHUT UP RIFT RAFT!" Shooting Star yelled.

Rift Raft and Shooting Star were running from a group of stallions, one of which was the head of the mall.

"I still can't believe they all actually waited for us to leave." Rift Raft said.

Everypony watched the scene unfold in front of them. Rift Raft and Shooting Star were about to be caught by one of the stallions when the stallion was hit by what looked like a laser, but the laser only pushed him back a little.

"TAKE THAT!" A voice yelled.

"IT LOOKS LIKE I, MOONSHINE, MUST SAVE THE DAY AGAIN!" Moonshine yelled, she was wearing a COBRA suit and was holding their crossbow that shot useless lasers.

"MOONSHINE?!" Rift Raft, Shooting Star, Gamertag, Game Shard, Sound Blast, Blaze, and Skyler all yelled at the same time.

"Yep..." Kiara said annoyed.

All of a sudden, a bunch of security ponies came out of nowhere and grabbed the group of stallions.

"Sorry everypony, this group had been at it for awhile, whether they are sexually assaulting a mare or pretending to be head of the mall." One of the security ponies said and dragged off the group of stallions.

"So... do we continue?" Blaze asked.

Everypony yelled, "YES!" And the band started playing.

~~~Later~~~

Everypony was at the bar, Moonshine was still wearing her COBRA suit, and everypony was talking about their day.

"Oh, that reminds me, I had to tell Gamertag, Kiara, Shooting Star, and Rift Raft something." John said.

Everypony looked at him. He then said,

"I got a letter this morning from our school, they are going to be having a reunion next week."

Author's Note:

I don't has a lot to say for this chapter.

So.... See you next Saturday!

Please leave your constructive criticism and a like!