It's Not Easy Bein' Seen

by helmet of salvation

2. A Twitch in time

Trembling, wide-eyed, enveloped in darkness, Princess Twilight Sparkle could not ignore the summons any longer.

She had to disregard all that her senses and rational intellect were telling her.

It was time for action.

With the tiniest squeak of glee the alicorn, or winged unicorn, threw off her bedclothes, leapt to the floor and scampered over her bedroom threshold and down the passageway. On the way, she slowed to a creep and peeked through the open door of Spike's bedroom.

The purple, scaly form was curled up in his own bed, his green rounded spinal ridges following a spiral contour to the tip of his tail. His forelegs tenderly embraced a white plush unicorn toy with purple mane and tail. Narrow tendrils of smoke drifted from his quietly snoring nostrils through the open window. His face bore the contented smile of one without a care in the world.

Twilight had to smile, too. She decided to let him sleep a little longer. It was still the dead of the night, after all. She would most likely need his assistance throughout the day; he would serve her more effectively if he was fully rested.

Flight was the young alicorn's quietest means of locomotion. She spread her wings, gently kicked herself from the floor and fluttered along the curving hallway before settling in front of a door. Kinetic energy flowed from her horn to the door, opening it. From a ledge beside the the doorway in the darkened room, an oil lantern glided towards the centre of the room and settled onto a flat surface. With an adjustment of Twilight's magic, the lantern ignited to reveal the interior of Twilight's laboratory.

The walls of the large room were lined with chests of drawers and shelves packed with books and scrolls all sizes, thicknesses and vintages. Other shelves contained various scientific apparatus: conical flasks, beakers, retort stands, burners, pipettes, safety goggles. Dominating the centre of the room was a long, wide, wooden bench coated in fire-retardant material. Although it was relatively new it was already showing signs of wear: indentations, stains from inks and other fluids, and the occasional scorch mark. Since making Friendhip Castle her home, this was where Twilight practised her manifold experiments in science and magic—two related yet distinct disciplines in the realm of Equestria, although Twilight's personal favourite was undoubtedly magic, even before she discovered the near-unprecedented scale and diversity of the innate magical energy within her.

Twilight's horn generated another wave of kinetic energy. A drawer opened from which emerged an ink pot, a quill pen and a ream of loose paper leaves, all settling neatly on the bench to Twilight's left. She adjusted her magic to pluck three stout hardcover books from their respective shelves and guide them onto the bench in front of her. To her right, she levitated the basket of herbs that Zecora had provided her the previous day.

Twilight made it a point to keep her lab meticulously organised, ensuring everything was exactly in its expected place. This kept the time spent preparing for her work to the minimum number of seconds. Still, they were seconds nevertheless, precious seconds she could have spent actually developing the lovely, lovely spell that had silently beckoned her from her bed. She stole a quick, regretful glance at the empty perch jutting out from the wall on her right. She could have used Owlowiscious' help right now. Yet she had returned home considerably later than she had expected the previous evening, too tired and overwrought to contemplate any nocturnal work, so she had decided to turn in and leave the bird to his own devices. He would be out prowling the nighttime environs for small mammals—or possibly female owls, who knew? In any case, Twilight had to make do without either of her assistants for the time being.

The alicorn was just getting into her mental flow when a round of distantly echoing knocking jarred her from her focus. Stifling a yelp of alarm, she soon heard another succession of urgent knocks. With a burst of energy, she disappeared from her place at the bench, reappearing a second later outside the laboratory door. Spreading her wings, she kited through the passageways of Friendship Castle and down the main hallway, settling at the front door. As she cast her magic at the door to open it, she began muttering to herself. "Who could that be at this time of ...
morning?”

The bright Equestrian sun was elevated just above a row of humble yet attractive thatch-roofed buildings, baking the unpaved streets and dew-blanketed grass in its encouraging glow. Trees stood tall, readying themselves to feed on the energy that their green leaves extracted from the sun. A small number of early-rising ponies strolled through the streets or prepared their places of businesses for trade.

It was a fittingly idyllic backdrop to the pink, pouffy-maned young pony who stood beaming at the entrance of Friendship Castle. A member of the earth pony race, who bore neither horn nor wings, her eyes were wide, bright and engaging and her smile even more so.

"Morning Twilight," replied the pink mare, her voice characteristically high and cheery. "How did you sleep?"

Okay, thought Twilight, that's a slightly unusual way to greet somepony. Still, by Pinkie Pie's standards, 'slightly unusual' is downright orthodox. "Like a baby. Why?"

Pinkie Pie's smile left her face in an instant. In its place was an intent stare, her right eye pulsing rapidly. "What sort of baby? Spirited? Touchy? Grumpy? Did you sleep through the night or wake up every couple of hours?"

"Uhh..." Already disconcerted at the realisation of how thoroughly she had lost track of time, and her failure to notice dawn had broken, Twilight found Pinkie's rapid barrage of questions and accusatory, twitching glare even more unsettling. She reeled back a couple of steps, revealing to Pinkie a dim glow from deep within the castle.

Pinkie peered at the light and gasped. "That light's coming from your lab. Did you pull an all-nighter, Twilight? Tinkering with ancient enchantments in an attempt to while away the restless, anxious hours? Or desperately practising for an upcoming test you think you're adequately prepared for but aren't completely sure?"

"What? No."

"You can tell me, Twilight. I'm not here to judge you." Pinkie held Twilight with a gaze that she intended to convey friendly concern, an impression somewhat undermined by the throbbing of her eyelid.

"I said no, Pinkie Pie." Twilight had regained most of her composure. "I was wide awake early because I'm excited about a new spell I'm learning, so I thought I might as well make a start."

"And you had no trouble sleeping until then?"

"None at all."

"What about Spike? How did he sleep?"

"I was sleeping just fine." The baby dragon's grumbled reply echoed down the long hallway as he wiped the rheum from his eyes and trudged moodily towards the two ponies.

Twilight coughed out an embarrassed chuckle. "Sorry about that, Spike. Although, in fairness, it is time you were getting up."

"Swell." Spike let out a copious yawn that almost sounded like a roar, his stubby forefoot not quite big enough to conceal his toothy gape. "What were you two jabbering about anyway?"

Twilight turned back to the visitor. "Yes, Pinkie, why are you so keen to know how we slept?"

"Uh, hello-o? Haven't you noticed my eye twitching yet? See, there it goes again. A classic quintuple upper right eyelid outward throb. And you know what a quintuple upper right eyelid outward throb means, don't you?"

"Actually, I find it rather hard to keep mental track of your different tics. Thankfully, I haven't lost interest in trying to understand the Pinkie Sense. Oh, no, I find it truly fascinating. And to that end, I've created," Twilight paused, unable to contain her mounting excitement, "a flowchart! Now I can follow all your tics by movement, body part and quantity, as well as the content and order of your 'comboes'. So if Spike would be good enough to fetch the chart from my study, we can follow the flow and determine what your twitching means." She turned to her assistant with a squeal of joyous anticipation and jerked her head twice towards the general direction of her study.

Spike responded with a measured blink and a voice as dry as fire. "Or, you could just ask Pinkie what it means since she's, you know, standing right here."

Twilight's face fell. "Urgh, do you have to take the fun out of everything? All right, Pinkie, what does a quintuple upper right eyelid outward throb mean?"

Pinkie addressed the pair with great solemnity. "It means that one of my friends here in Ponyville didn't get enough sleep last night due to being highly upset about something. Therefore it is my duty to bring them joy, relieve their trauma and ensure that their nights hereafter are filled with unbroken slumber and the sweetest of dreams."

"That's an admirable goal, Pinkie, but you're not seriously going to—wait a minute. Last night? I thought your Pinkie Sense only told you about immediate future events."

"I know, right? It would be much more beneficial to get this sense before they go to bed but what else can I do?"

Twilight eyed the pink pony dubiously.

"What? I don't control the Pinkie Sense, I just experience it."

The alicorn was still uncertain but decided to let it go. She knew from painful experience that disregarding Pinkie Pie's innate sense was an invitation to disaster. "Okay, but as I was saying, you're not really going to go around asking every pony in Ponyville whether we got a good night's sleep, are you?"

"Of course not, silly. Remember it happened to one of my friends. So that should narrow it down to——"

Twilight and Spike simultaneously completed her sentence. "Every pony in Ponyville."

Pinkie Pie paused for a few seconds to let this realisation sink in. "You guys busy today?"

All outward signs of fatigue deserted Spike as he bounded to Pinkie's side. "Where do we start?"

"Where do I start?" Twilight cut in. "I am busy today as it happens, and so are you, young dragon. So before you go cantering off looking for a needle in a haystack——"

"Haystack? Great idea, Twilight, we should definitely take them out for breakfast. Except we need to make it a special treat. Pancakes, waffles, crepes, oat smoothies ..."

Determined not to let the earth pony sidetrack her, Twilight raised her voice above Pinkie's babbling. "I think I have an idea as to who might have been sleepless in Ponyville last night."

"Rarity?" Spike grinned, ever hopeful of an excuse to pay a call on the exquisitely beautiful unicorn.

No wonder you're so eager to help, Twilight thought wryly. Before the alicorn could dash his expectations, though, Pinkie exclaimed, "Of course, that must be it. Nopony treasures their beauty sleep more than Rarity. And strictly off the record, she does have just the teeniest-weeniest, ittiest-bittiest tendency to overreact to emotional distress."

"But——" Twilight tried in vain to protest.

"So what are we waiting for? Let's go." Spike vaulted onto Pinkie's back and seized two tresses of her curly mane like reins. Pinkie reared up with a whinny and shot away from the castle, leaving only an evanescent pink, purple and green mist behind.

With a guttural growl of exasperation, Twilight galloped off after the pair.

* * *

"Did-did I sleep well? That is the 'emergency' for which you interrupted my morning beauty regimen?"

Pinkie Pie's quest to increase Rarity's level of happiness was off to a shaky start. The unicorn's pure white coat was only half-brushed, her normally elegant purple mane was flaccid, she had no blush and the eyelashes on her left eye were slightly crooked. It was in this state that she had hastened downstairs from her bathroom, unceremoniously hauled Pinkie Pie and Spike inside the Carousel Boutique—hoping nopony outside saw her—and was now grilling them on the reasons for their untimely intrusion. If anything, her right eye was twitching even more alarmingly than Pinkie's.

Rarity's seething admonition was interrupted by a paff of energy from outside the front door of the Carousel Boutique, her home and place of business. It was the unmistakable signal of the teleportational arrival of Twilight Sparkle, confirmed by the shouted voice that followed the knocking on the door. "Pinkie, Spike, I know you're in there."

"Aaand Twilight's here too. Splendid." Rarity magically opened the front door, yanked Twilight inside with her forehoof and slammed the door shut, the bell above the doorway tinkling wildly. "I always dreamed of having an audience with royalty while looking like I've just escaped from Tartarus."

Spike gazed adoringly up at the unicorn, either not noticing or not caring about the imperfections in her appearance. "I think you look stunning."

"I'll stun you in a moment, silver tongue."

Twilight grimaced. "I am so sorry about this, Rarity. I'll explain in a minute." She rounded sternly on Pinkie and Spike. "As for you two, I never said anything about Rarity. I was referring to Fluttershy."

Pinkie Pie's eyes widened to dinner plates while her pupils shrank to mustard seeds. "Fluttershy? Sweet, delicate, innocent, vulnerable, sensitive Fluttershy?!" Her right eyelid quivered alarmingly before she rocketed several feet above the floor and screamed "Why didn't you say so?" She turned and galloped in mid-air for a few seconds, clearly intending to burst through the boutique door and apparently forgetting that said door normally opened inwards.

Thankfully, Rarity telekinetically opened the door in time for the pink pony to zip through the doorway and out of sight. The unicorn closed the door and turned with a weary, knowing smile to the speechless Twilight. "Yes, why didn't you?" she teased.

Twilight and Spike gave Rarity some time to finish grooming herself before the three set off towards Fluttershy's cottage. They were in no hurry. Fluttershy's animal care duties typically required her to rise early, and given the mood she had been in last night, there were worse starts to the morning than having Pinkie Pie show up to bring cheer, even if the pegasus turned out not to be the source of Pinkie's tic. As the three walked, Twilight filled Rarity and Spike in on the events of the previous evening.

"And there I was in a state about how atrocious I thought I looked, just because I hadn't finished primping. This wretched creature has to live with her horrid appearance her entire life?" Rarity shook her head. "I can imagine Fluttershy being most upset at that."

"A visit from Pinkie Pie might be just what she needs right now," replied Twilight. "Spreading joy is what Pinkie lives for, after all."

They followed a winding path leading up a small hillock to a modest sod-roofed cottage. Normally, an assortment of woodland creatures, feathered and furry alike, would have been milling about nearby. Now, the exterior of the cottage seemed deserted, with no sound except a periodic splash of water. After Twilight knocked on the front door, she and her companions exchanged concerned glances as they became aware of the sound of high-pitched, heart-rending wailing emerging from the interior of the cottage.

"Sounds like Pinkie has her work cut out spreading joy around here," said Spike.

"You can say that again."

The three visitors turned in surprise to the cottage entrance. It was Fluttershy who had spoken. Her sad eyes had circles beneath them and her mane was slightly unkempt, yet she was basically composed. She stepped back from the doorway, revealing that the source of the despairing sobs was Pinkie Pie.

Pinkie sat desolately in the centre of the cottage living room. A collection of animals in Fluttershy's care had formed bucket brigades on either side of the pink pony, dutifully collecting the fountains of tears erupting from her eyes and passing the full buckets down the lines to be emptied through a rear window into a large swimming pool, to the delight of a watching sea lion.

As Pinkie noticed her friends' arrival, she struggled to suppress her emotions. "Did-did-did you hear wh-wha-what Flutter ... sh-shy said abou-about the s-squ-squ-squo-squo——?"

"Twilight's told us all about it, darling." Rarity placed a kindly forehoof on Pinkie's shoulder.

Wiping her eyes dry on her foreleg, Pinkie continued, her eyes haunted. "A creature who spends her whole life alone, who spends every waking hour crying? It's just wrong. My destiny, the essence of my being, is to spread joy and laughter. But what can I do to make a squonk feel valued? Tell a joke, sing an upbeat song, bring her to a party? How can I do that if she won't even let me look at her? It's an indispensible part of making others happy. It doesn't matter how exuberant your voice, how upbeat your words, how tasty the treats you're offering: if you're looking elsewhere, they feel ignored. And if they feel ignored, they feel like they don't matter. And if they feel like they don't matter, they feel miserable. And if they feel miserable, they don't. Feel. Happy." The earth pony slumped onto the floor and stared at nothing in particular. "Unless you're blind, then lack of eye contact is acceptable" she added in pensive qualification.

Rarity's look of helpless sympathy suddenly gave way to the wide-eyed gape she usually acquired when inspiration struck her. She gently lifted Pinkie's head and gazed with feline eyes at her. "Why Pinkie Pie, I'm surprised at you, giving in so quickly. Surely you're aware of a certain brand of party that is literally tailor-made for situations such as this?"

Hope flooded Pinkie's blue eyes. "Of course, it's so obvious. A blindfold party! All the guests will wear blindfolds. Hee hee hee, that'll be so much fun. And with an air of mystery, too. We'll have food-tasting contests and piñatas and we'll play Blind Pony's Bluff and Pin the Tail on the——"

"Pinkie!" yelled Twilight, who had spent several seconds trying unsuccessfully to get a word in edgewise. "We can't spend the whole party blindfolded. We'll keep bumping into each other and knocking things over."

"Yeah. In Twilight's case, even more than usual," added Spike, who narrowly ducked a swat from Twilight that collected a little table of Fluttershy's.

As the mortified alicorn levitated the table back to its original position, Pinkie pondered aloud, "Hmm, good point Twilight. Sorry Rarity, looks like we'll have to think of something else."

"I am thinking of something else, as it happens," replied Rarity patiently.

"Already? Wow, that was fast."

Rarity ignored Pinkie's interjection. "Although we will still need some blindfolds."

Comments

[grogar]

Good chapter, but i Think there about to learn the most saddest thing about a squonk, since "scientific name" of the squonk is Lacrimacorpus dissolvens, which comes from Latin words meaning "tear", "body", and "dissolve".