Doomflower

by Ganondox

Leg

Even though it was raining, it was still a beautiful spring day. Outside the simple hospital were a row of purple flowers in the flower bed, full of red pollen as they were ready to make more flowers. The light shower rolled off of their petals, givining them a light shine.

Meanwhile another beautiful moment was happening inside. A blue stallion and a white mare were about to become parents. Moonshine's hoof was being firmly grasped by his wife, who was clinching it as hard as she could. She was going through labor now. The water had already broken awhile ago, so it wouldn't be long before the child came. As another wave of sweat washed done her face as she grimaced and then screamed in pain. Her husband offered her reassurance.

"You can do it, honey, it won't be much long now."

The midwife could be heard giving similar encouragement, only it was less personal and included the phrase "now push, PUSH!", but to Evening Lilly all the sounds blurred together in her pain. At last she felt something give and the midwife reached in and pulled the foal out of her. She sighed in relief.

A quick glance confirmed that it was a filly and an earth pony, and the midwife clamped the umbilical cord and cleaned the foal. After the placenta was expelled and Evening Lilly had time to recover a bit the now wrapped filly was placed into her hooves. She was a moderate shade of purple with a reddish mane. Once she opened her eyes they could be seen to be a stunning shade of magenta. Evening Lilly looked out the window at the light shower of rain outside, took notice of the flower bed, then her gaze went back to her daughter. Through the pain she smiled.

"I'm going to call her Rainflower."

***

Seven months had past. Moonshine was a pulling a carriage, while Evening Lilly and Rainflower were in the back. They were going across Equestria to their summer home. As they pressed along Evening Lilly held her daughter by the window so she could look outside. They were passing by a forest now, and Rainflower opened her mouth wide as she saw trees flashing by and felt the wind in her face. The wind picked up her mane and tossed it around. The sweet scent of pine filled her nostrils. She felt wonderful.

Suddenly a new odor joined that of the pine. It was sharper, muskier. It smelled wrong, so she started crying. Her mother tried to comfort her, but she had no idea what was wrong. Evening Lilly brought her daughter to her teats and offered her fresh milk, but she refused to take any. Then she smelled it as well. Somewhere in the forest something else was smelling fear.

Without further warning a pack of timberwolves emerged from the forest. Evening Lilly screamed as they pounced onto her husband and tore his flesh off. The bonds connecting him to the carriage snapped, sending it careening into a tree. As the carriage crashed mother and daughter were sent flying into a heap. After Evening Lilly came to her senses she found that she had a severe wound on her head, but that would have to wait. She had to find her daughter. It didn't take her long to hear Rainflower bawling from underneath the rubble. Evening Lilly pulled her out as quickly as she could, not noticing the snap that could heard as she pulled one of Rainflower's legs out from the rubble. She could hear the wolves gaining on her, so with Rainflower in her mouth she ran as fast as she could away from the forest.

Even after the timberwolves were far out of sight she kept on running. She ran until her vision grew blurry, but she couldn't stop yet. She had to get her daughter to safety. After what seemed like hours she arrived at a small town. She located the hospital, burst in, set Rainflower down, and exclaimed one last sentence before passing out.

"Her name is Rainflower."

***

Gold Hair jumped as the door opened. Standing in the doorway was a white mare with a red mane, holding a small, mewing, purple foal in her mouth. Well, a second glance confirmed that her mane was actually yellow, but it was soaked in blood that came from a wound on her head. The mare staggered in and set the foal down on the floor.

"Her name is Rainflower."

With that the mare let out a moan, swayed back and forth, and collapsed onto her side. Gold Hair then approached the fallen. Upon examination he noticed that the filly wasn't untouched either. The flesh on her left hind leg was badly torn and was fractured above the knee. Both ponies had life threatening wounds, so he would have to divide the resources.

"Sun Stone, come quick! I want you to attend to the mare while I work on the filly!"

An orange mare wearing a nurse's hat rushed in from another room in the simple hospital and headed to the mare. Meanwhile Gold Hair picked up the filly, who he assumed was Rainflower, and took her over to the operating table. The wound was beginning to become infected, so the limb had to be amputated. He reached inside a chest underneath the operating table and pulled out a rope, a scalpel, tweezers, a saw and a syringe. Using the rope he applied a tourniquet above Rainflower's wound. Normally tourniquets are risky as the loss of blood flow can kill a limb, but this was not a problem here as he was going to amputate the leg.

He filled the syringe with a sedative, injected it into the squirming foal, and as she began to wind down he got to work. He delicately slashed through skin, muscle, and sinew, pulled out shards of bone and pieces of flesh, and sawed through the last bit holding it together. At last he retrieved an iron, heated it up, and sealed the wound. The procedure was complete.

He then went over to check on the mare, who he assumed was Rainflower's mother. Her head was bandaged up and Sun Stone has laid her to rest on a bed. That was all they could do here. In Canterlot they had all of the latest medical technology, but here in the village of Cowdoor they had to make do with what they had.

Crying could then be heard as Rainflower awoke. Sun Stone headed over to the filly and picked her up, carrying her over to her mother. Gold Hair smiled as she cuddled up to her mom.

***

The mare had been in a coma for several days now, and there was no sign of recovery. Gold Hair concluded that she had suffered brain damage from trauma which was then aggravated by stress. If she had not overexerted herself she might be ok, but now it looked like she wasn't going to make it.

On the other hand, the filly was doing great. Rainflower had gotten used to her new stub and was eagerly crawling around. Soon she would be walking. The missing leg would make it impossible to run correctly, but only three legs are needed to walk. However, the real problem was going to be what would happen to her once her mother was gone.

As Gold Hair stared at the foal scooting across the floor of his room he came to realize what he wanted to do. He never wanted her to go away. He was going to adopt her.

***

Rainflower hobbled over to the operating table. She lived with Gold Hair in a living quarters attached to the village's simple hospital. On the operating table was a grey earth pony, and Gold Hair was working with his tools between her legs. Rainflower balanced her stub on a block by the table, and placed her front hooves onto the table, giving her a better look.

Gold Hair was using a scalpel to slice skin from the pony's inner thigh, which he then removed with a pair of tweezers and placed to the side. As Rainflower moved her gaze up the ponies body and came to it's face she gasped. The grey mare's face was horrifically mutilated.

"Daddy, what happened to her?"

Gold Hair didn't even look at her as he responded, he had to keep focused on his work.

"She was burned when she tripped while holding a pot of boiling water and it splashed on her face. She looks the way she does now because I had to remove the burned flesh, but I'm going to fix it soon."

"Well how are you going to fix it? And why are you cutting skin from her leg? Did she get burned there as well?"

Gold Hair let out a small chuckle.

"No she did not. Actually, the answer to your other questions are the same. I'm taking skin from here so I can attach it to her face and fix it. Soon enough it will heal and she will be better. This is called grafting. Sometimes the skin is taken from another pony, but that is more risky. Pieces of bone can also be grafted if a pony breaks one of their bones badly."

Rainflower now watched as he placed skin onto the wounds on the mare's face and sewed it back on. As her mind turned she began to think of a deeper question.

"Can legs be grafted?

Gold Hair stopped as he heard this question. It took him a moment to respond, and he actually turned towards her.

"No, sadly they cannot, at least not for ponies. Trees can have their limbs grafted together, even from completely different types of trees, but for nothing more complicated than a tree has such a complex graft ever been successful. However, you don't need another leg, you are my perfect little filly with all three of your legs."

He stopped working and pulled Rainflower into an embrace and for a moment the filly was happy the way she was.

***

It was Rainflower's first day of school. She eagerly trotted as fast as she could up to the other school ponies, who were conversing in smaller groups. Instead of welcoming her, they glared at her. Some showed confusion, some pity, but others displayed cold disdain. A brown colt from one group shouted at her.

"This is Stone Heart's group."

He gestured to a large, pale yellow colt in the group. He had a brown mane and turquoise eyes. Stone Heart then spoke, his voice full of hatred.

"Only cool ponies are allowed here. You aren't cool, you are a freak, so stay away from us!"

Rainbow cowered and scooted away from Stone Heart. Maybe she would find some nicer friends somewhere else.

***

Not only was Gold Hair a doctor, but he was also an apothecary, brewing potions and medicine for the ponies of Cowdoor. Rainflower learned a deal of the trade from him. At the moment she was making making an antibiotic with Gold Hair's help.

She was standing at the cauldron with Gold Hair behind her. He supported her and helped guide her hooves to make sure the potion would end up in perfect condition.

"Daddy, now what?"

"You need to keep stirring, or else it will burn. We aren't ready for the next step yet."

Rainflower kept stirring, but her arm was getting tired. The brew was getting quite viscous at this point. She wanted to add some more ingredients. After what seemed like an hour and she felt like her foreleg was going to fall off and join the rest of the concoction the doctor spoke.

"Ok, you can stop now. Now add the five teaspoons of elderberry extract."

Gold Hair had already measured out the extract and placed it in a cup, so she only had to dump the contents of the cup into the cauldron. Rainflower sighed with relief as Gold Hair took over stirring. Eventually all the water boiled away, living nothing but a pile of powder.

"Now to use this powder it's meant to be mixed into water and dissolved. The solution is then to be drunk, and it can help with bacterial infections. You did a very good job at making this."

Rainflower looked up to her stepfather and smiled.

"You are the best daddy ever! You make it ok that I don't have a mommy."

Gold Hair looked back down at his step daughter and smiled back.

"And you are the best daughter ever."

He then bent down and kissed his daughter on the head.

***

Rainflower watched from the top of the hill. Down in the valley the other fillies were playing with a ball. She was reading a book, but from time to she glanced at the fillies. She watched as a purple filly tossed the ball across the field, and a group of fillies pursued it. A blue filly she did not know caught the ball, and the other fillies tried to pry it away from her. One of them, a pink filly with a spiked green mane, returned her gaze, and she stopped the game.

"Rainflower, come down and play with us."

"No, I'm fine. I'd rather read this book. Thanks for the offer."

The fillies resumed their game, and Rainflower let out a sigh. That was a lie. She wanted to be in the game, but she couldn't. If she joined their game they would have to tone it down to accommodate for her limp, and they wouldn't want to that. She would make the game worse, not better. She considered herself lucky enough that the filly even took enough pity on her to offer her a spot.

Her three-legged self was not perfect.

***

There was one unicorn in Cowdoor. Grey Dusk was an old mysterious pony. He had a long beard, only one eye which was a bright red, and mainly kept to himself. Most of the other ponies in Cowdoor were afraid of him, and the foals made up stories about him, saying he a sorcerer who cooked little fillies up to eat for his breakfast, he would use his beard to tie colts up, and he lost his eye when one little pony tried to fight back, but now he could use his remaining eye to see fear. However, Rainflower was going to have none of that. She felt the she knew what it was like to be alone like him, wanting nothing but a friend. She was going to be his friend.

Rainflower walked to the old grey cottage at the edge of the village without fear. She scuttled right up to the rundown door and knocked on it. A gruff voice from inside yelled back.

"Who are you and what do you want?"

Rainflower piped back without hesitation.

"I'm Rainflower, and I want to be your friend!"

Rainflower heard the sound of locks jangling on the other sides, then watched as the door glowed with grey light and swung open. Standing in the door way was Grey Dusk, his one red eye looking as if it was staring straight into her soul.

"Why do you want to be friends with an old fool like me? Why doesn't my broken gaze send fear into your heart?"

"Well, I think missing part of you is no good reason to be made fun of, and I figured you would be lonely. See, I'm broken too."

She then turned and displayed her stub to the unicorn.

"I see. I guess I am lonely. Come on in."

Rainflower followed the unicorn inside. The place was messy, with papers and clothes strewn all over the place. However the thing that interested Rainflower the most was the scores of books lining the walls. As Rainflower could not run she had spent a lot of time reading. As Rainflower explored the place Grey Dusk nonchalantly explained his past.

"I was once a craftsman in Canterlot, a carver, and one of the finest at that. After I lost my eye is a horrific accident I lost my sense of depth, forcing me out of my business. I left to the country, were no one knew me, hoping to start anew were no one knew who I was, where I wouldn't need much of my former skills to survive. I came here, where there are no other unicorns. I can always find a way to use my magic to pay for what I need to live. I'm sure the only reason the village council has not called me out as a sorcerer and banished me is because I provide services for them. "

Rainflower stopped looking at a book she found on the ground called "Tales from the Stable" and turned to Grey Dusk, who was now sitting on a saggy grey arm chair.

"Have you thought about trying to get a new eye? My dad told me grafting limbs is impossible, but he didn't say anything about eyes."

"I've never heard of grafting eyes before, but now that you speak of this, you remind me of an old legend. According to the legend there was once a student of Star Swirled the Bearded, one of the greatest sorcerers to have ever lived. This student's lust for power caused him to turn evil, and he tried to overthrow his master. In the resulting fight he lost his left front hoof and his horn was broken. However, this did not stop him. He managed to find a way to reconstruct his horn, and give himself a new hoof. Using this technique he built chimeras, abominations made from multiple types of animals, the greatest of which was a Drakonequus modeled after Discord, the lord of chaos himself. The legend then says that a knight slew the warlock and his monsters, but that isn't important. If this legend is true then it would indeed become possible to graft limbs, but it's probably just a legend."

Rainflower hoped it wasn't just a legend. Any hope was a hope.

***

Soon enough Grey Dusk became Rainflower's friend. She spent many afternoons at his house, chatting with him and reading his books. She wanted to find anything that could give her a lead and looking within those dusty old tomes seemed like a good place to start.

When Rainflower was bullied she sometimes fled into the forest. Inside she found a clearing to be alone. There she could read those books and practice potion making in solitude. Eventually she began to tame the animals of the forest, and she started practicing medicine by healing the animals. She assembled a pack for her trips to the woods which she called her adventure pack. Inside was medical tape, a scalpel, a saw, tweezers, potion supplies, and smaller pouches for potion ingredients she found in the the woods.

Over time she developed new potions that she used for healing. By combining information from the books she read and her original discoveries she believed that she was making progress with finding a way to graft limbs on, and she had helped many wounded forest critters in the process. However, sometimes the surgeries weren't always a success, and near the clearing was an animal graveyard. Rainflower cried for them and felt guilt as she was responsible for their deaths, so to put herself at ease as she reminded herself that their deaths were not in vain, she was trying to help them, and with this new knowledge she was going to find a way to help crippled ponies everywhere.

She was going to be a hero someday, she would become whole.

***

As Rainflower came to school that day she saw something that filled her with dread. Stone Heart now had a large rock on his flank. The rest of his gang also had their cutie marks. She tensed up and lowered her head as she braced for the onslaught that would come once they saw her. She tried her best to slink past them, but one of the goons noticed her anyway.

"Hey look, there is the freak! Not only is she a freak, but she is a blank flank too. I bet you she is gonna remain a blank flank for life!"

Stone Heart stepped up and struck her where her cutie would be with full force. She straightened with a start from the sudden blow, but she lost her balance and fell over onto her side. Books fell out of bags on her sides. She blushed and tried to cover her face as everypony laughed at her.

"That's the only mark you are ever going to get on your flank."

The gang laughed. After they stopped Stone Heart continued.

"A cripple like you is useless, you will never a special talent. I bet if you ever got one it would depict a broken twig, because all you good at is ruining things. In fact..."

"I bet your cutie mark represents your talent is being a block head. Leave her alone, you good for nothing bully!"

Rainflower recognized that voice. It was Melon Head, her only friend her age. The green maned pink mare was now standing between Rainflower and Stone Heart.

"Why you little punk, you're just as much of a freak as her. I would pound you right now, but I've got better things to do than deal with you freaks. Come on guys, lets go."

As the bullies left Melon Head helped Rainflower gather up all of her books and get her back up onto her hooves.

"Ray, Are you alright?"

"Just a bit startled. Mell, what if they are right, what if I am destined to be a good for nothing blank flank?"

"Don't take any mind of them. They are just stupid jerks who are mad because they won't amount to anything in life. You have shown me that you are really talented with potions and medicine. Do you remember that one time you fixed my dog up?"

Rainflower was on her feet now, brushing herself off. All her books were gathered.

"Yeah."

"If it wasn't for your help he might be dead now. I thanked you once, but I'll thank you again. You really do have talent."

"Thank you."

Together the two friends hugged, then walked to class.

***

Rainflower had salvaged a pair of mice from a trap. One was dead, and the other lost it's leg. Today Rainflower was going to work magic. In front of her was a pot filled with a green gel. All of her study of potion making came down to this last brew, and from descriptions she found she had reason to believe she had recreated the concoction used by the fallen warlock. Using her scalpel she amputated a leg from the dead mouse, then used a brush to apply the gel to the top of the leg. She then did the same to the wound on the other mouse.

"Let Harmony be found in Discord."

With that she attached the leg to the mouse. There was a soft glow, then it stopped. The leg was held fast, and it was moving. She had done it. She had recreated the "Demonic Flesh Glue", as one source called it. Now she could work miracles. She set the mouse free, and stood. As she got up she noticed something. There was now a a pair of flasks full of potions on each of her flanks. She now had her cutie mark.

She had to go home. She would show the mark to Gold Hair, Grey Dusk, and Melon Head. They would all be so proud of her. Then she could go show Stone Heart. She would show him that she was more than just a useless freak.

***

The years went by, but even though Rainflower now had the means of attaching a new leg, she lacked an actual leg to attach. That was ok. She had her cutie mark, and for the most part she now had a few friends to defend her. Stone Heart's gang stopped taking so much interest in tormenting her as they found they had other things to do.

Then the time came were Rainflower was now a young mare, and then it was time for the end of the year party.

***

Rainflower was talking with Melon Head about the upcoming party to commemorate the end of school. They were sitting underneath a tree in the park. They decided they were going to have a blast together. Then they heard a voice.

"Melon Head, where are you?"

They both recognized the voice of Melon Head's coltfriend, and she stood up.

"I got to go. See you later."

She then headed off, leaving Rainflower alone. At this time a brown colt approached Rainflower, whom she recognized him as a friend of Stone Heart. As he loomed over her he delivered a message with an unusual amount of emotion in his voice.

"Rainflower, listen to me. Stone Heart said the if he catches you going to the party and ruining it then he will mess you up real bad. He wanted me to deliver this to you as a threat, but I'm telling you as a warning. Please, for your own safety, don't show up. He isn't bluffing."

With that the colt gazed at the ground and trotted away. Rainflower could do little more than breath heavily as she thought over what she just heard. She knew perfectly well that Stone Heart had no problems with hurting her.

***

Despite Stone Heart's threat, she decided to come to the party anyway. She came late as she didn't decide to make this choice until well after the party started, and she sneaked in as best as she could. After weaving through the crowed she finally found a dancing Melon Head. Mell stopped dancing once she saw her friend.

"Hey Ray, you're finally here! What took so long?"

Rainflower shushed her friend.

"Shh. If Stone Heart finds out I'm here he's going to pummel me."

"What a block head! How can someone he so mean? Oh come one, don't be afraid, dance with me!"

So together they danced into the night, Rainflower dancing the most exotic dance of all as she had to improvise for only three legs. This made her quite the star of the dance floor, until at last she attracted some unwanted attention.

"Rainflower, I told you not to come!"

As she heard Stone Heart shout she lost her balance and fell on her rump.

"You always come and ruin everything! Now I'm going to show you!"

The crowd back away in fear of the stallion. Melon Head stood up and tried to keep him back, but he just punched her in the face, knocking her to the ground. However, she could still try, and she clamped onto Stone Heart's back legs, bring him down.

"Ray, escape now!"

And so Rainflower fled the party, not stopping until she got back home.

***

Rainflower returned home to retrieve her adventure bag, and then headed off into the forest. She flew through the forest as fast as her three legs could carry her, not noticing the familiar trees as tears flew out of her eyes and obscured her vision. At last she came to her secret clearing, where she curled up into a ball and cried herself to sleep.

However, her sleep was not for long. She awoke as she heard the sound of a branch snapping. As her eyes flutter she noticed a familiar form in the moonlight. Swaying before her was Stone Heart. As a breeze came towards her she smelled liquor on his his breathe. She stood up, sweat coming to her brow. As soon as Stone Heart saw her he yelled at her.

"You little crippled horse! I found your little spot were cut up small animals or summon demons and you can't hide now! You ruined the party and everything, and now you must pay!"

Rainflower tried to flee, but she found herself shaking so hard that she lost her balance. She lay trembling as Stone Heart came over.

"Please d-don't hurt me. I-I'll do anything. Just let me be."

Stone Heart laughed.

"Hurt you? I'm going to kill you or worse!"

He roared and Rainflower screamed. She tried again to escape, but he got up to and clamped a hoof over her mouth and pulled her to the ground, her adventure pack falling off.

"It's the middle of the forest in the dead of night. No one can hear you scream."

He was on top of her. He then proceeded to pound her in the mouth until blood flowed. She squirmed all through the time he was on her. When she slowed down he grabbed her head with his hooves.

"No one is going to miss a freak like you once you are gone. I might as well make you useful for once in your miserable life before I end it."

Rainflower tensed as she figured out what was going to happen next, her blood going cold. Stone Heart was adjusting his position. She needed to find a way to save her now. Out of the corner of her eye she saw her adventure bag, and she remembered it's contents. She only had one chance to save her life, and now was the time to act.

With one last extortion of strength she broke one hoof free from underneath him and punched him in the eye with full force. As he was knocked back she rolled to her side and reached for her pack, fumbling around inside it until she found the scalpel. Stone Heart was now even more enraged and brought himself down on Rainflower with full force, but now she was armed and could defend herself.

With the fury that can only be found within panic Rainflower slashed at her attacker's neck repeatedly. Even after she struck his jugular she could not stop as she too full of adrenaline to think properly, much less stop. At last she came to her senses, and she saw the blood, so much blood. It had been spurting from Stone Heart's body with each heart beat, but his heart wasn't beating anymore. Rainflower was horrified when she realized what she had done. She had killed another pony.

***

After she calmed down and stored away her guilt, at least for the mean time, she realized something. There was now a body in front of her, and she might as well make the death not be in vain by making use of it. She had to work quickly, before rigor mortis set in. In her pouch was the magic grafting ointment that she got her cutie mark for. With scalpel and bone saw in hoof she made work on his left hind leg until she had the needed part removed.

Now it was time for the painful part. Using the scalpel she cut into her stub, and opened the scar back up, exposing the bone. She sawed the femur open, biting her lip as tears ran down her face. At last the hardest part was over. She applied her paste to the wound where it would merge on the leg, and placed the parts together. She felt a stinging sensation and felt herself shake as magic bonds merged the bodies together. The process seemed to sap her energy, and she collapsed from the exhaustion. The stress of the whole ordeal was just too much.

As she lay on the earth, she breathed slowly. There was nothing to fear now, she was now at peace. She was finally whole.

***

After burying the body as best as she could she returned to the village. Maybe they would finally accept her now that she had four legs. She saw a group of three mares conversing outside their house, so she approached them.

"Hello. I got myself a fourth leg, so now I can be with you!"

However, instead of welcoming her now they were even meaner to her than before. One simply shrieked, but the other two were more verbal with their distaste.

"My word, what have you done now? You witch!"

"Now you are even more of a freak, stay away from us!"

Rainflower watched as the pony who shrieked ran away. Rainflower turned and ran away as well, running for the first time in her life. Maybe she could find comfort at home.

***

Rainflower entered her home. Inside Gold Hair was reading a book. She walked up in front of him.

"Daddy, look! I've figured out how to fix myself!"

As he glanced up from his book she turned to display her new leg to him. Instead of displaying joy, he displayed jaw dropping horror.

"Ray, do you know what you have done? The council will be outraged! Oh, my dear sweet Rainflower..."

"Why aren't you happy? I'm whole now. I can show you how I did it, then you can fix all the other amputees."

"NO! These secrets were lost for a reason. No good can come of this. This power corrupts. I'm sorry Ray, I...I still love you, but, oh dear..."

He then stood up and hugged his adopted daughter, who was still confused. Rivulets were streaming down his face.

***

It didn't take long before it was discovered that Stone Heart had gone missing, and news spread that Rainflower now had his leg. Rainflower was brought before the council. Everypony now knew what she did. She stood before all of Cowdoor with her head bowed, back to the spectators. Across from the audience stood the council, reading her sentence.

"Rainflower, for the crimes of witchcraft and murder, you are hereby banished from Cowdoor. After sundown you are never to be seen in this town again, or else a more fitting punishment would be dealt to you. This is an act of mercy."

The council went silent. Rainflower then turned to face the crowd. She tried to approach Gold Hair, but he would not meet her gaze.

"Father?"

"I'm sorry, but as much as I loved you, after what you have done I cannot associate with you anymore. I'm so sorry."

His voice was mournful, and his eyes moistened the ground at his hooves. Grey Dusk then emerged from the crowd and approached Rainflower. He handed her a map and a carving.

"Here, take this. The map will show you how to get to Canterlot, where maybe you will be able to start a new life, hopefully one free from such prejudice. This carving will prove that you met me, and may make your time easier."

She took the gifts and stared at the old wizard, not quite sure what to say. At last she said all she could.

"Thank you."

She then looked for the final pony in the crowd who still cared about her and wasn't shunning her. As she passed through the mass the other ponies backed away from her, disgusted. At last she found Melon Head. The moment the mare saw Rainflower she just latched onto her and wept. At last she stopped and found her voice.

"Ray, I guess this means goodbye. If I can ever break free from this place, I-I'll try to find you, wherever you are. I-I love you, I-I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too, M-Mell. W-when you can, try to f-find me in Canterlot."

The pair embraced and cried until at last they had to break apart. Rainflower then headed home, grabbed her pouch, and head off into the distance.

She might have gained a leg, but her had lost everything that she held dear. She was now dead to Cowdoor, and Cowdoor was dead to her. Maybe Canterlot would be a better place.

Comments

[Ganondox]

If I should label this as mature instead of teen please tell me. When I say this story is dark, I mean this story is dark.

EDIT: Ok, I don't mind if people don't like the story, but can you at least say why? My only other story of mine that wasn't well received was one I wrote as a joke, but this one was completely serious. So with the information I have the only reason I see that this story is disliked is because it has a gore tag and features an OC. I'd really like some feedback as I'm not finished with this story yet and I want to see what the current problem is.

[Aeternus Frigore]

so when can i expect an update to this

[Ganondox]

1017865

When I have time to finish the next chapter. I'm in the middle of a move right now, so my life isn't very stable and I don't have a lot of time to write.

Also, do you have any reason why you like this and everyone else seems to hate it?

[Big-X]

It seems to have a decent premise, although the execution is somewhat rushed, (okay, very rushed). If possible, a bit more show and a bit less tell, but aside from that, it's pretty good. Hey, if you can work on making it somewhat slower paced, and the descriptiveness a bit more, descriptivenessy(What? I couldn't think of how else to phrase that!) then you'll probably have a pretty decent story on your hands.
Also, I think I may track this, as it is interesting enough to hold my attention.

851206 Also, I don't think that it needs a more mature rating, the violence really isn't descriptive enough to require that.

[Ganondox]

1257145
It seems that no matter how much time I put in all my pieces end up looking rushed. Does this look anymore rushed than anything else I wrote? Except for the gore scenes I tried to use showing over telling. If you don't mind could you describe how you would want part of it to be rewritten?