Rainflower was once an ordinary earth pony, but after a horrific accident she was left crippled and orphaned. The filly was adopted by the doctor and potion maker Gold Hair, who had to amputate her hind leg to save her life. This caused the other foals to constantly make fun of her, and she wanted nothing more than to be whole again so she may join the other ponies in their games. After rediscovering a long lost and forbidden recipe she learns the she may finally have the answer to her quest, but it comes at a grave cost. The question is, is it worth it and will it really be enough?
Chapters (2)
If I should label this as mature instead of teen please tell me. When I say this story is dark, I mean this story is dark.
EDIT: Ok, I don't mind if people don't like the story, but can you at least say why? My only other story of mine that wasn't well received was one I wrote as a joke, but this one was completely serious. So with the information I have the only reason I see that this story is disliked is because it has a gore tag and features an OC. I'd really like some feedback as I'm not finished with this story yet and I want to see what the current problem is.
so when can i expect an update to this
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When I have time to finish the next chapter. I'm in the middle of a move right now, so my life isn't very stable and I don't have a lot of time to write.
Also, do you have any reason why you like this and everyone else seems to hate it?
It seems to have a decent premise, although the execution is somewhat rushed, (okay, very rushed). If possible, a bit more show and a bit less tell, but aside from that, it's pretty good. Hey, if you can work on making it somewhat slower paced, and the descriptiveness a bit more, descriptivenessy(What? I couldn't think of how else to phrase that!) then you'll probably have a pretty decent story on your hands.
Also, I think I may track this, as it is interesting enough to hold my attention.
851206 Also, I don't think that it needs a more mature rating, the violence really isn't descriptive enough to require that.
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It seems that no matter how much time I put in all my pieces end up looking rushed. Does this look anymore rushed than anything else I wrote? Except for the gore scenes I tried to use showing over telling. If you don't mind could you describe how you would want part of it to be rewritten?
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It has been updated.