Dead Birds

by Stray Dog Kane

Bad habbits

Gilda was flying in the air outside again. From above, she could see the lights were off across Ponyville. All the little ponies were snoozing. Good for her at least, less trouble and less guilt, and the last thing she needed was getting caught.

“Now I was thinking…” the Snark began in her head. “We’d try the town square, eh? Make the mess less able to ignore and what not? Hm?” Gilda piffed and went for a landing, just going through the motions for now.

The square was bright despite the indoor lights being out. With festive banners hanging above it, and a bright tree overlooking it as well. Ornaments hanging here and there and the festive tables were out, with clear evidence ponies flocked there some hours ago. You could get the feeling of mirth and joy, and a bit of a holiday spirit too from the image.

If only one was in the mood for it, and if the party didn’t go on without you. Gilda kicked some snow up at that thought. To her, it was another joke at her expense. The ponies were happier without her as usual.

“That’s it, get in the spirit of it,” the Snark said, proud of her scowl. But it just made her more annoyed. “You can only carve your joy out of the wreckage of your enemies, it’s how it works for the unwanted.”

“Oh shut up,” Gilda replied, shaking her head. “Just tell me what you want me to do, alright?”

“Aw, are the pretty ponies making you tired?” He ate a snowball for that, the white dust impacted and vanished into his body. He then responded with a chuckle. “Hee, hee! They would, always mouthy on lessons that go nowhere for you. Seeing as you didn’t matter to them anyway, but still…”

The Snark sat himself at one of the tables, putting his legs up as he spoke. “We just need to leave a huge mess here. Nothing too fancy, maybe even make it look like an accident, but whose is the question they’ll wonder?”

“Ok,” Gilda replied, leaning on the table with her back, not looking away from her spectral tormenter. “You got an idea or what?”

“Well, it not too hard,” the Snark shrugged with mirth. He did notice Gilda was still looking for him to expand on it. “I mean, not to hard for someone with with some vision. See that ice statue over yonder?” He pointed a hoof that ended with a talon point.

“Hard not to miss it,” Gilda replied, seeing what was likely the image of a alicorn from ice. Smooth, elegant, and in dire need of a nasty chipping she found herself thinking.

“Lots of work goes into that, just like that steam carriage some local made not to far from it,” the Snark continued.

“How much you got this planned out?” Gilda said with dull surprise.

“I can see through their eyes you know, here and there from time to time,” he replied, and Gilda felt worried about that concept, he noticed. Not with usual glee, but more somber. “Oh, oh don’t worry my little bird dear! I might only see what they see at times, but I’ll always have eyes for you and vice versa.” She cringed at that thought.

“But enough on day dreams, we got business to attend,” the Snark continued, hopping up from his seat. “They got more fireworks, locked away near the festive grounds. Major hazard if the kids got into them! And that steam carriage is just waiting to move forward into that ice sculpture. That tree isn’t aflame yet…”

“That all?” Gilda stated, with some humor. Crazy, sure. But this idea was sounding like fun for once, despite the situation anyway. She found herself smiling even.

“Well…” the Snark flew and ran to the tree. “You could use a big stick.” A whole branch came off, with his tail taking a razor-like slice through the wood. “Still got that hand to eye thing down, Eagle Scout girl?” He threw it over to her.

“Shut up,” 1st striker Gilda answered, catching the stick with ease. “Those girls were dorks from grade school.”

“But that branch, now, will break down the other festive stuffs they have dangling about,” the Snark giggled back. “Now we just need a plan for these tables.” He looked to the griffon. “You got anything?”

“Maybe…” Gilda said and pondered on that, then smirked. “Have the tree...fall on them? Could work. If it’s on fire, it will light em up after it crashes down on top of em.”

“You're a nutter G, I love it!” the Snark said with enjoyment. “That’s the way little bird!”

“You realize…” she was about to ask.

“Sound, yes.” the Snark sighed, he stopped it excitement for a moment, holding his muzzle as he thought. “Hmmm, we just light a few fuses, those fireworks will cover you nicely...and the crashing ice sculpture...”

“Fireworks and that steam engine,” Gilda repeated the plan in summary. “Then it’s smash and fly? That it?”

“And be home for a good, long laugh,” the Snark finished with glee. “Take the ponies down a peg by removing the things they enjoy, but clearly you can’t. What do ya say, G?” He finished with a grin.

“Where’s the stuff at?” Gilda snarked back.

“Walk this way.” With that, “The Snark” trotted, lept, and cartwheeled away. Gilda just followed with a claw on her head. The Snark would just keeps being grating, even when she’s working with him.

The steam carriage was in an open shed and, with some elbow grease, it was now poised to run forth into the ice alicorn. Then it came the fireworks, sitting out in the open, with nothing but a tarp and a “Keep out, this means you CMC!” sign to keep it defended.

Ok, a chain lock too. But a quick talon did away with that.

“They got rockets!” Gilda said with a look of joy. “Even the multi bottle rocket ones! Sweet!” She hadn't seen things like these in years, and giggled with glee on how big she recalled they blew up.

“I know, it like several celebrations, an attack item, and a good fire disaster all in one,” the Snark said as he gleefully examined one as well with his cool claws. “Just like the old rocket racing karts, oh time does fly...”

While the story about rocket carts sounded like fun, it was a story for another day. They carried them back to the square. The fuses were ready. But what next?

“Rockets hit the tree…” Gilda began as she conceptualized. Looking past her claws at the scene in front of her.

“...cart with it’s engine running moves forward, get a good speed…” the Snark conceptualized next to her.

“That banner might fall with the tree, but only if it’s tall enough.” she added.

“Still gets knocked down, still lights up with the tables. A fine burn for them I’d say.” he chimed back.

“Kay,” Gilda continued, lowering her claws. “Now, how we going to smash the other hanging stuff? That can be tricky...”

“Be fleet of wing little bird,” the Snark answered with assurance, looking with a kind look. “With the crashing and smashing and blasting, several quick whacks will be missed. And so will you, if you take to the rooftops. Then you fly away, with the ponies staring down at those flames. Easy, huh?”

“Sounds like it,” Gilda agreed with a big talon up. “I cool with it.”

“Ain’t it great?” the Snark said proudly as the griffon set it up. “Back to your old, confident, self. Not afraid, not sad, you're the bird they cannot change!” He hummed a bit, drifting along side her as she walked back to the steam cart. “I’m so happy to see you got better.” He paused “And breaking things too, mind you. But, boy!” he laughed.

“Don’t ruin this,” Gilda deadpanned, annoyed with his incessant glee. “Do you ever shut up?”.

“Then let’s get that engine running,” he replied with a giggle. “That will shut me up.”

The multi rocket was in place to hit the tree, with the other bits around the tables. That steam engine was prepped and ready to go. Gilda lit the fuse and the carriage lurched, it’s engine sound giving a dull rumble as it moved forward to its date with the pretty ice alicorn. All while the fire on the rocket burned closer to blast off.

She was back in the square, in the air. Gilda beat the club against her claw, ready to break more. Her and the Snark were smiling, eager to see the show they had made. Oh, this was going to be good.

The rockets fired off first. After a second of being one rocket, they became eight. The tree didn’t stand a chance and burst into flames with several loud bangs. Several fast detonations and the thing fell to explosive lumber jacking. True to form, it came down on the festive tables. That was the signal.

In a quick dash, Gilda smashed the hanging stuffs and ornaments. The banner wishing a happy holiday fell into the flames, as did several cheap balls and stars. She was in the zone again. Able to clear this square in 10 seconds flat. Even with the weather picking up with sudden winds.

“I’m glad we can be on such good terms now.” She could “The Snark” hear over it. “After all, I am a friend that will never leave you,” his words were ruining it. “We get along like two peas in a pod, two…” She batted a star made of plastic at him, which he ducked. “...well actions speak better,” he stuffed it then with a sheepish look.

Sure enough, lights were coming on with the lough crashes and blasts. The town ponies were spooked, and would get around to looking outside soon. Gilda was up on the roofs quick to enjoy the view of the disaster of Hearths Warming Eve.

Best part, she got a good view to see that crash. The little steam cart that could, made by somepony as part of a long term project, was now reduced to a clunky missile as its full speed hit the target.

The blow was enough to bring the sculpture on to it, causing limbs and wings to break off the sides. Gilda was about to laugh, but then it blew up...

Metal, a shock wave, and more fire launched forth. Even she had to wonder how she didn’t fall over when the house she stood on shook from the blast.

“Dude…” she said wide eyed in awe. “How the…”

The whole steam thing was scrapped. More fires, windows were blown out in the square, and the locals weren't just yelling now--they started screaming in terror, with more than a few crying for help.

“And that ice just went and punctured that tank,” the Snark said next to her, nodding and seeing the clear humor in the picture they saw. “Hot and cold just don’t mix well, hm?”

Gilda just looked on at the site of the punchline of that joke. Ponies below ran about all in a panic, some trying to put those fires out. Fear, noise, anger, all from below. It was uncomfortable, but it was kind of cool. For a race on top of everything since forever, they were losing it fast. All a bunch of hot air...

“And to think, all you had to do was give up on these ponies,” the Snark said smugly. “Aren’t we glad?” She didn’t answer him. “At last, Gilda was happy again.” Sometimes, she kind of was. “You can truly see what’s really funny when only you get to laugh at it now.”

“Why…” Gilda said, and was doing her best not to enjoy that laugh.

A few would be mortified on what she just did, even if others expected it fully. Dr. Shy being among them, the same pony that kept trying to make her a softy. The mental, softy pegasus that had been trying, and kind of failing, to keep the griffon form just agreeing with her dad that ponies would be better seen packaged in tin cans.

Then again, this was the most power she’s had over her life since she had given it up to sulk alone. Ponyville’s power over her and her emotional state felt weakened as it trembled at her actions. She just did that, and after all she felt dragged through, those results were something that gave part of her a smile.

Even with another part of her demanding of she answer to it.

“...is this fun?” Gilda finally said stoically, unable to be sure how to feel.

She flew off, back to Fluttershy’s home leaving the mess behind her for someone else to clean up. The weather only got worse as she was leaving, threatening a small blizzard to come. It might help with the fires, or cover her escape at least.

“Aw, now you’re down again,” the Snark said, disappointed in her head.

She kind of was disappointed, that’s for sure.