Life is What You Make It, Or How You Happen To Have It Thrown At You

by Pegasus Lightning

New Attitude

Rainbow gave three bits to help pay for the bill, and sped off to home. She had work to do. Upon seeing how much her friends cared for the relationships they were all in, she knew what she had to do. Correct her mistake. Or what she thought was a mistake.

“Hey, Tank.” she said to her tortoise pet. He smiled and went back to his nap swiftly.

Rainbow got to work. She took all of her magazines, all of the play-colts, and threw them in the trash promptly. She took down her suggestive poster of Spitfire, and replaced it with a more moderate one. She then removed all of the stallions' cologne from her bureau. She then went out to buy some other type. Ugh she thought, I'm going to hate this more than watching the butterfly migration. She approached Rarity's Carousel Boutique.

“Welcome to Carouse-” Rarity stopped, “Rainbow Dash? Hello, dear. Need something?”

“Could you keep it a secret?”

“Sure, anything for my friends.”

“I need some-” she gulped, “p-pe-per”

“What is it, darling? Spit it out.”

“You know what I'm trying to say. Perf-”

“Please just say the entire phrase, deary.”

“PERFUME! I NEED SOME PERFUME! HAPPY?!?!”

“Yes, quite. I knew what you were saying, I just wanted to hear you say it!” she giggled.

“I hate you. So, what've you got?”

“I've got this lovely new one from Dodge Junction, smelling of cherries, if you like it.”

“Mmm, not bad. How much is it?”

“Free for my friends, of course.”

“Oh, I couldn't, here just take ten bits-”

“T'won't be necessary, Dash. Go on, good luck scoring a stallion!” she cheered.

Gee, thanks. Too bad you have NO idea what that'll take. She thought, rather angrily.

She approached the library. Before even knocking, Spike opened the door.

“Oh, hey Rainbow Dash. Twilight's inside.”

“Thanks, Spike. Where 'ya goin?”

“Sugarcube Corner. Pinkie invited me and Fluttershy over for some board game with her and Gummy while she watches Poundcake and Pumpkin Cake. You're welcome to join me if you want to.”

“No thanks, Dragonborn. Have fun.”

Spike walked away, and Rainbow entered the library.

“Oh, hi Rainbow. Come for another Daring Do have we?”

“No, not this time. Do you have any books on how to impress?”

“Three. One's out to Trixie, which is late- why? Looking to impress Scootaloo?”

“Not quite. She's already impressed,” Rainbow gloated with a smirk, “where are they?”

“Over here near the pony to pony interactions section.”

“Thanks.”

“Rainbow,” Twilight said with a concern, “Exactly who are you trying to impress?”

“If you must know, a stallion. I'm getting kinda lonely.”

“Ahh, seeing Emerald made you want somepony, too. I get it. Take it for as long as you need it.”

“Thanks, Twi.”

“Good luck!”

She muttered “Thanks,” then walked off before taking flight up to her cloud home.

Before nightfall, she'd already began to transform herself.
“Being this isn't for me.” she continually thought. “I can't screw things up for me and my friends. Not now. I can't be it anymore. I can't be a Lesbian. I have to be straight.”

She convinced herself that, if it were true, her life would be simpler, and less awkward, than if she were a Lesbian. To add to her difficulties, she also felt no affection to any one of her friends. Or any mare in general. She did, however, think highly of some, like Spitfire. She thought this simply because of her affiliation with the Wonderbolts, which she didn't have to lie to herself about. In addition, she did enjoy the looks of some rather handsome stallions. Not to the point of affection, but she did agree with Rarity (Most of the time) when she'd point out a good-looking one. She began her transformation rather ambitiously.

To start, she entered in her bedroom. She got out a piece of paper, and, pen in mouth, began to write a list. Not a typical list, but a list of stallions she happened to know. Big Mac and Doctor Whooves were the only two that came to mind. Thunderlane came next, but after that, they were pretty much all older or colts. To add, she hadn't seen most of them since flight school and her first Sonic Rainboom. This pained Dash. Now she had to not only impress these stallions- but also meet them and think highly of them as well. Oh, boy. Or rather, boys.

The club now seemed like a legitimate option. She couldn't just go alone. Fluttershy was too shy, Rarity too proper, Twilight too caught up in her studies, Pinkie-Pie too busy with the new twins- Applejack! Perfect! Now she had to ask Applejack three things;
1. The location of the club
2. How to pick up stallions
3. If she would go with Dash

The mare headed down to Sweet Apple Acres. Upon flight over the picket fence, she spotted Scootaloo and Applebloom behind Big Mac. They were smiling, giggling as they did, presumably for a sleepover at the earth pony's home. Big Mac looked back at the flying cyan pony.

'Wow. Holy Celestia is he strong.' She thought, 'But there's absolutely NO WAY that I'm going out with him.'

“Hey Big Macintosh. Applejack here?”

“Eeyup.”

“She done with her chores?”

“Eeyup.”

“Is she in already?”

“Eeyup.”

“Cool. See ya.”

“Eeyup.”

She flew to the front door. Without even a knock, Granny Smith came out the front door. Applejack was right behind her.

“No, Granny. You can't just buy a windmill.”

“You should rreally rrespect yourr eld-ars, missy.”

“We don't even have the money to replace your hip. How in the hay do ya think we're gonna be able to afford a windmill?”

“I'll just sell this use this useless farm...”

“Granny, we live here. And who in the good name of Celestia wants an apple farm?”

“I don't. I want a windmill.”

“Who exactly is going to sell ya any windmills?”

“The... how'd I get out here? Get me back in, I'm a-freezing my apple buns off!”

“Oh, hey Rainbow. Sorry, mah Grannysmith's just losin' her marbles.”

Rainbow chuckled.

“It's fine.”

“So, what brings 'ya round these parts at this hour? It's gettin' dark.”

“I know. You're the only person I could ask with this. D'ya want to go to Club Alicorn?”

“A club? Why, Ah haven't been tah a club in ages. Ah met mah ex-coltfriend there. Thinkin' of getting' lucky?”

“Well- yeah, heh, but I'm getting lonely.”

“Yah, I guess I am too. I could use a nice stallion to help me look after the two children.”

“Two?”

“Applebloom and Granny Smith!”

Wild laughter broke out between the two.

“So, on that note, you ready?”

“Yah, ah guess, just let me tell mah brother.”

And, with Big Mac's consent, the two were off for a night of partying. Hardcore. The club was almost full when they arrived. Special thanks to the MVP; DJ Pon-3 (Aka Vinyl Scratch), who went big after her hit beats at the wedding of Shining Armor and Cadance. She'd moved on to Dubstep, and now to Clubstep.

“SO, HOW DO I TALK TO ONE?” Rainbow yelled to Applejack over the pounding bass.

“DANCE!”

“WHAT KIND OF DANCE?”

“SUGGESTIVE! EROTIC! LIKE A FREAK!”

The two walked to the center of the dance floor. Rainbow shook her head, and turned back to her friend.

“Huh?”

“Dance low near his- thingy” Applejack whispered in Rainbow's ear.

“His what?”

“You know-”

“No, I don't”

“His pee-” She trailed off ever so slightly.

“Applejack, just tell me!”

“HIS PENIS!”

Half of the stallions in the vicinity turned to Applejack. Most carrying seductive looks on their faces.

Rainbow looked to the centre of the dance floor. She confidently strode out to a small group of large stallions. She peered in to see one breakdancing on the ground. The rest were stomping their hooves on the ground. The three other mares were all dancing (rather suggestively) within two inches of the stallion they wanted. Rainbow Dash wasn't one who was much for dancing, but she had to try.

She turned, noticing that Applejack wasn't anywhere to be found. She looked around the neonic-lit club. The pounding bass of Vinyl Scratch's sick drops, the aroma of cheap cologne and faint scent of herbs and alcohol made for one hell of a time. Especially for one recently-turned straight cyan pegasus, whose first time in Club Alicorn was just utterly ridiculous. Finally, her eyes met a brown hat, being held close to the rather disgusting floor. She looked up to see a certain farmpony engaging in a kiss with a large, dark maroon unicorn. The unicorn was holding AJ's hat while they enjoyed themselves. Rainbow turned herself to face another group of stallions. This time, two sported sunglasses. One had a hat with a small bolt lightning on the brim, which he was wearing backwards. One of his friends was also sporting a jacket with 'Sierra Flight School Stars' on the back. Rainbow couldn't turn her eyes away from the pegasus with the hat and glasses. He wasn't that big, but he was certainly fast, as Dash could tell from his sleek figure and long wings, which were currently spread out across his back. She immediately stepped towards him. She walked closer. The group was almost within reach now. Dash made her move before they turned to leave.
She took flight, and flew straight into the stallion. She knocked his glasses clean off, to reveal a rather surprised looking colt. A colt that was now holding her shoulders. A colt that was now smiling. Obviously, he enjoyed her approach somewhat.

“Nice entry, kid.”

“Thanks. I try.”

“I'm aware.”

“Name's Rainbow Dash.”

“I'm gonna guess you think you're pretty fast, huh?”

“Well, I am the ONLY pegasus to ever do three Sonic Rainbooms-”

“No way.”

“Yes way.”

“If you're so confident, why don't you do another?”

Rainbow thought about it. Her consideration and train of thought were quickly interrupted by his gazing, starry eyes. She liked him. He can see right through me, Rainbow thought. Well, at least I can see right through him. She was correct. His interest in her was easily seen. She was reading him easier than a children's book.

“Sure is.”

“Well, then I guess it should've been I who bumped into you. We've got some things to discuss, Miss Dash.”

“Oh yeah? Like what?”

“How long you can hold your breath.”

“Wha-” Dash was cut off by the

Comments

[Dark Harvest]

by the........BY THE WHAT??!!!! must know!

[Ironreaper71]

Am I the only one who is really scared of what the THE is?

[emberghost]

713434 the sudden realization that the writer trolled her.

[Pegasus Lightning]

Dear valued readers;
I apologize for the lengthy wait for the next part, but my computer crashed in the midst of me posting the next part , and I had to rewrite the ENTIRE next chapter. Here it is. Thank-you everypony for your cooperation!