Rarity Begins Her Super Well Thought Out, Not Convoluted Plan
Hmmm... yes, that will be just perfect.
Sitting in her boutique, Rarity had just finished devising the final part of her secret-to-most-ponies plan. Flicking the switch on the lamp illuminating the room she was in, she decided to retire to her bedroom earlier than normal so she would have enough energy for the coming days. Walking to her bedroom, she couldn't help but get excited for what she was about to do the next day.
Oh, this will be just grand! I never thought that doing romantic things for other ponies would be almost as much fun as having them done for you! I just hope that Dash will like them... oh, who are you kidding, Rarity? Of course she will!!!
Setting her alarm clock to get just the right amount of sleep, she climbed into her bed to slumber.
Knowing when Rainbow worked on this day was essential to Rarity's plan; Rainbow had to get up earlier than normal to clear the clouds, she had heard from various sources that today she would be awake at 8 am as opposed to her normal 12 pm. This game Rarity a fairly clear time to expect the pegasus back home; generally, Rainbow would start at 12 and be done at about 3, doing what took most pegasus about twice as long. Today, she had to get up at 8 am, though, meaning that she would be back at about 11 am.
She would set up her first surprise for when she came back home to nap; having to get up early was likely not something Dash enjoyed, so what better way to cheer somepony up than to leave a nice bouquet of flowers at her door? Granted, this wasn't the most original idea Rarity had ever had, but she figured that she needed to start somewhere.
Waking up at 6 to provide ample time to style her mane, Rarity stretched her legs, yawned, and climbed out of bed feeling refreshed and rejuvenated.
“Mmmm, nothing like a good night's sleep before an exciting day, right Opal?”
Opal just stared at her and licked her own paw.
“Why yes, this is the day that I begin to woo Rainbow Dash. Can you just imagine how excited she'll be when she sees that bouquet on her doorstep?”
Opal replied by standing up, stretching, then laying back down in a slightly different position. Rarity was happy for her enthusiasm and support and went back to finishing her morning routines.
Alright, that went according to plan; flowers are set at Dash's house. Now I just need to pay Twilight a visit to inform her of her part of my plan.
Stopping in front of Twilight's castle, Rarity knocked on the door three times, like she always did (it's important for a lady to be consistent). After a couple of seconds, Twilight answered to door.
“Oh, Rarity, what brings you-”
“Twilight, I must speak with you and time is essential; if I am not quick enough, there could be some complications in my plan.”
Twilight was slightly confused by her strange behavior; it was unlike Rarity to interrupt somepony in such a manner.
“Ummm... ok? Come in then, I guess.”
“Thank you, Twilight.”
Walking to Twilight's kitchen area, Rarity sat down where they had had their discussion the other day and beckoned Twilight to sit. Then, after taking a rather long breath, she said:
“So, I want to talk to you about Rainbow; you see, the way I see it, talking to her friends is going to be the first thing she will do when she finds out that she has a secret admirer. But which friend will she confide in? Obviously not Applejack or Pinkie Pie; Applejack, the ruffian that she is, would probably mock her, whereas Pinkie would try to throw her a party. Fluttershy would be too embarrassed to talk about it... so that leaves you or me... it only makes sense that she would go to me for this sort of thing...”
“Yeah... sure she would.”
“...but I am not home at the moment. So... that leaves you, Twilight. I just wanted to let you know that she will probably be by any minute now; it would be nice, dear, if you could calm her down, since she is no doubt excited, and talk to her about it.”
Twilight looked at Rarity cautiously, “So... you would like me to convince Rainbow to go out with you.”
“Well... if you think you could....no, I should stick to my plan. I just want you to calm her down and... well... do you remember when I first started dating Thunderlane, how excited I was and how we talked about it for hours after he asked me out?”
“Yes, but what does that have to do with-”
“Well, I would imagine it'll be a lot like that.”
At that, Twilight gave her a look of surprise and bewilderment, “...It'll be like that? How much time have you spent with Rainbow Dash?”
“Well... I've invited her over on several occasions for tea... I also invited her shopping in Manehatten once...”
“And?”
“...she said she was busy; just because she is a busy mare does not mean she will not be excited about finding out she has a secret admirer; I do not appreciate your lack of enthusiasm, Twilight, this is an exciting time for Rainbow and me.”
With that, Rarity turned her head up and away and gave Twilight her best offended pose.
“Really, Rarity? Don't I get a say in this? You can't just show up and spring this on me with no warning.”
“No warning? This is the warning! If I didn't tell you right now you would just find out from Rainbow in a couple of minutes. And I figured you would be happy to help a friend like me or Rainbow...”
Twilight, clearly frustrated with the situation, massaged her nose with her hoof for several seconds before replying, “Rarity, I don't feel comfortable with this; what if Rainbow is... unreceptive in regards to your surprises?”
After giggling for a second at Twilight's question, which couldn't possibly happen, Rarity started to worry that this may have been taking too long.
“Oh, you worry too much... and... well... I'd hate to do this, but there's little else I can do. You Pinkie Promised not to tell anypony when we first talked... and you cannot just turn Rainbow away... so...”
Seeing Rarity's point, Twilight admitted defeat with a sigh.
“Yes, well; to be honest, I just assumed you would help me with this, Twilight. That may have been wrong of me, buuut, well...”
Several loud knocks echoed through the castle, startling the mares, followed by a panicking pegasus's yells.
“Twilight, it's Rainbow; open up, it's an emergency!”
Now knowing that this talk took too long, Rarity acted on her contingency plan.
“Soooo, does this castle have a back door, or something?”
Twilight's horn lit up and a nearby window on a wall opened.
“There you go.”
“Twilight, darling, that is a window.”
“Oh, really?”
Walking to the window, Rarity stared to carefully climb out of it so that she could use the vines on the wall to safely get down the two or so meters the window was off the ground.
“Hmpf, well then; I suppose it'll do. Thank you for your help Twili-aaahhh.”
Rarity got about halfway out of the window before Twilight's horn lit up again to push her out the rest of the way.
Twilight teleported to the door and opened it to an extremely frantic and paranoid looking Rainbow Dash, who was looking around with jerky motions in an attempt to see if anypony was watching her.
Twilight just looked at her and said flatly, “Rainbow, what a surprise; is there some-”
“Twilight! You're not gonna believe this... pony feathers, this is bad, Twi; really bad.”
Rainbow pushed Twilight out of the way and galloped inside; Twilight just sighed at her friend's behavior.
“Oh, I'm sure I won't... But don't you think you might be overreacting just a bit?”
“No! I am not; somepony could have seen it!! I'd be ruined, I tell ya; ruined!”
Once again sighing, Twilight replied, “Alright then, just tell me what happened.”
“Ok... brace yourself, in fact, you might wanna sit down for this: It started just like a normal day; everything was just like always... but then...” Rainbow shuddered, “I got home... and... and...”
“And what?”
“There... on my door step...” Rainbow paused (for dramatic effect) “flowers, Twi; somepony left me flowers!”
If this is how she reacts to flowers, I can't imagine what she'll do with whatever else Rarity has planned. Twilight thought, Well, I suppose I should try to calm her down...
“Rainbow, this isn't that big of a deal; it's not like-”
“What do you mean not a big deal?! What if somepony saw? What if they took pictures?!? I'd lose my daredevil license! I'd become the laughing stock of the weather team! The Wonderbolts would probably discharge me! I'm sure they have some sort of no flowers policy or something... I'd never-”
“Rainbow! You're overreacting!” Twilight yelled to stop her ranting, “None of those things are going to happen, it just means that- wait... is a daredevil license actually a thing? Who issues such a certificate? You know, never mind. All the flowers mean is that somepony is interested in you, Rainbow.”
Rainbow just looked at her like she was stupid, “Uhh, yeah, Twi... like, how'd ya figure that one out, read it in a book?”
Twilight's eye started twitching as she looked at Rainbow, “You know, I'm done...” She said; then, in a louder tone, “Done with both of you!”
Rainbow just snickered, “Done with what? Both of- yaahhh”
Not having to worry about injuring Rainbow, since she can break solid rock with her face, Twilight flung her friend out of the window.
“You know, I'm done...” Twilight said; then, in a louder tone, “Done with both of you!”
Noticing Twilight's aura on the window, Rarity quickly started to climb down the vines on the wall. She barely made it out of the way in time before a rainbow blur flew out of the window.
Gasp; she threw my pretty, prismatic pony out of a window; my Rainbow Dash! Oh, what if she falls and... Rarity saw Rainbow right herself and then fly away. Oh... right, she can fly.
Since Rainbow was no long talking to Twilight, Rarity decided it was an opportune time to go to the weather office and set up the next part of her plan.
Lets see here... who is in charge of clouds tomorrow afternoon? I know Rainbow works early tomorrow, so it's not her...who else? Oh well, I'll ask when I get there; but first, I need to grab some things from home.
Rarity went back to Carousel Boutique to dawn some unique attire; she would have to do this aponymously, so she would need to use a special gift she had gotten for when she wanted to avoid attention... safe to say, she didn't use it often... or really at all.
It was a slow day at the weather office; most of the work happened in the morning, after all; so nothing except paperwork really happened in the evening. An equine shaped being in a cloak stepped through the door and looked around for a moment. It seemed to glide silently across the floor and it was impossible to see any features of the creature under the mantle, save for it's shape.
The receptionist at the weather office looked up briefly before looking back down at her magazine. The cloaked being strode over to the desk and cleared it's throat.
“Ahem, can I speak to whoever is in charge of clouds tomorrow afternoon?” It said in an unrecognizable, yet clearly female voice.
The receptionist looked up from her magazine and raised an eyebrow, “Maybe... what is it you need, miss?”
“Oh, no; I wish to remain anonymous... can you just point me to where ever he or she is?”
“I... I suppose so; you want Cloudchaser.”
Letting out a short groan, Rarity quietly said to herself, “Of course it's her...”
“Her office is back 3 doors on the left; I'll let her know you're coming.”
Rarity walked down the hallway towards the room she was directed to.
“Hmmm, that was easy... a little too easy...”
Earlier that day...
Cloudchaser felt good about today... felt like something big was gonna happen for her. It was usually a feeling reserved for times she knew she was gonna get laid, so she would have to do whatever it took to make sure whatever was supposed to happen, would happen. Unfortunately, she was stuck at work all evening long, in the very building she was now walking into.
“You... uhh, receptionist-”
“It's Carol.”
“Whatever; if any strange mares come looking for me, send them directly into my office immediately.”
The receptionist just stared at her blankly for a couple of seconds. “Err... alright... is there a reason why?”
“What? Oh, nah. That just what I'm into.”
“...Right.”
Walking up to the door she was directed to, Rarity knocked on it three times.
“Come on in.” was the reply she got.
Walking into the room, she saw Cloudchaser sitting at her desk, filling out some sort of form before she looked up to greet the new arrival.
“Hey, score; I thought she was kidding, but... wait... Rarity? Boom! Double score! I knew that-”
“Huh- What?!” Rarity shrieked, “How did...how did you know who I was?!?”
Cloudchaser just gave her a smug look, “Uhh, duh; I stare at your flank, like, every time that I see you, that cloak doesn't hide it's shape, you know.”
Removing the hood of her cloak to reveal a strained smile and twitching eye, Rarity sighed.
“Yes... well...” she said, “Look, I need your help, but I need you to never tell anypony about this... ever.”
“Hmm, I see... yes...”
Rarity stared blankly at Cloudchaser, waiting for her to continue, before saying. “So... will you hear what I have to say?”
“What? Oh, I was just thinking of what you could do for this favor you're asking from me... but go ahead.”
Groaning, Rarity reached a hoof into her cloak, “Don't worry, I've already got something in mind.”
At that, Cloudchaser wiggled her eyebrows flirtatiously and leaned back on her chair with her forehoofs behind her head, “Oh?”
Rarity rolled her eyes before she pulled out a large brown bag and threw it on the desk.
“There's five hundred bits for the favor and-”
Pulling out a smaller bag, she added, “fifty for your silence on the matter... and to forget you saw me here.”
Cloudchaser seemed to start choking on something, coughing wildly.
“Sweet Celestia!!! That's more than I make in a month! How much money do you make!?!”
Rarity stood on her back legs and put her forehoofs on the desk, leaning closer to cloudchaser; in a quiet voice, she said, “Enough; now then, here's what I need you to do...”
Sleeping is great... sleeping on a cloud is even better. Sleeping on a cloud after being forced to wake up early to clear the sky of clouds is the best. Especially if you don't have an overly bouncy pink pony yelling your name.
“Rainbow Da~ash!”
Tossing and turning on her cloud, Rainbow tried her best to ignore the unignorable.
“Mmm, uhh... huh? Wha?”
Now practically screaming, Pinkie Pie once again yelled, “Rainbow Dash!!!”
Clearly irritated, Rainbow looked down at her Pink friend. “Ugh, what, Pinkie Pie?!”
“Oh, you're awake! I think somepony is trying to get your attention...”
Unamused at Pinkie's antics, Rainbow snapped back, “Oh really? Is it you?”
“Nopey-dopey! Well... Yep-a-roony! But not as much as whoever did that.”
Pinkie Pie pointed to the sky behind Rainbow Dash and smiled brightly.
Turning around, Rainbow saw what she was talking about: a message written with clouds for everypony to see and surrounded by heart shaped clouds of varying sizes.
“'Rainbow Dash, my love for you grows stronger by the minute and your beauty and elegance brightens everypony's day...' well then... it sounds like you've made an impression on somepony, Dashie.”
Rainbow gawked at it for a few seconds before she took off for Twilight's to speak to her about the new development.
Earlier that day...
“So that's what you want it to say, eh, Rarity?”
“Ya-huh, do you think you can do that? And she'll be taking a nap when she's done with her shift, so start then.”
“Hmm... it's a bit long, don't you think?
“Yes, well; I can request it to be five hundred bits long if I please... especially since I could just inform the mayor of our... transaction.”
Rarity had, of course, already bribed the mayor; so it was an empty threat.
“Long is good!! Nothing wrong with long; I love it long...” Cloudchaser wiggled her eyebrows once more.
“I... I just... never mind... I'm leaving.”
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Every scene I read just further illustrates how much of a disaster this will be. I love every minute of it.
5539365 Cool, that's what I was hoping for.
Also, if anyone has anything to say the help me improve on my writing, that'd be great. You know, like "You did this well" or "This seemed awkward" or stuff like that. Also, I feel like I seem to be all over the place in terms of how I convey what ponies are feeling; like sometimes I do the italics and write them thinking something, whereas sometimes I just write what they're thinking. Anyone think that's weird?
5551706
I think it's par for the course, really.
As far as romantic comedies go, you're doing an excellent job all around.
Rarity, I think your efforts are having the opposite effect of what you want them to have.
Will Rainbow ever find out who her mystery admirer is, or will she die of shame first? Find out next week on It Would Work On Me.