Meet The Elements
After the yellow pony that was known as Fluttershy nursed my cramp leg she told me that I was simply dehydrated and needed water though it hurts to walk a bit after I had a tall glass of water I was beginning to feel better, ponies wouldn't stop asking if I was okay they acted like some one came up to me and stabbed me in the leg.
I learned the names of six new ponies and evidently a dragon.
First was Twilight Sparkle, or rather princess Twilight Sparkle according to her there are exactly four princesses Celestia, Luna, Her, and a pony named cadence whom I have yet to meet and one prince Shining armor who is also the captain of the royal guard and her big brother best friend forever (her words not mine)She started barraging me with a hundred questions on what I was, where I came from, how I walk it took princess Celestia to get her out of her nerdgasim. Twilight told me what they're all princesses of which made me laugh and them a bit teed off but come on some one raising the sun is completely impossible there isn't any one that powerful. Celestia and Luna promised me after dinner that they would show me they're "skills" I took them up on that offer mostly only because I wanted to see the city again it was beautiful. Twilights looks herself were different than her friends she was about 4'7" at the withers to which I'm about 6'1", she's a lean pony with lavender fur and an indigo mane with magenta and purple streaks the end of her mane seemed to be turning to dusk with a few stars on the bottom. Her shoulders, back of her neck, and back had feathers on them all around her wings, her primaries and secondary wing coverts were more dawn yellow-orange, she has this weird finger claw thing you would normally see with bats on their wings. Her tail was interesting she had a long lion like tail but at the end there was the same coloration as her mane above her tail were tail feathers ( I guess that helps with steering?) I couldn't help but notice that she had a few faded scars on her left cheek to which she told me about the bullies who actually threw rocks at her because they thought she was a goody two shoes and a teachers pet which made her antisocial until princess Celestia moved her to Ponyville (really?) and she met her friends and learned that friendship was magic. Surprisingly I didn't laugh at that friendship can be very serious thing. she had a mark on her butt that was a magenta six pointed star surrounded by tinier white stars.
Applejack was an southern pony who seemed fairly familiar like I've seen her before, she runs an apple farm with her granny, older brother, and younger sister, she had one hell of a hoof shake. I didn't notice who she was until the general ran up to her and they nuzzled, she was the filly in the picture Golden showed me. That's Golden's eldest daughter, she was shorter than her 7 foot tall father (with Celestia being 71/2 feet tall and her sister 7'5" feet he's pretty tall) about 5'1" at her withers, she has white freckles that go from cheek to cheek... and I'm not talkin about her face GIGGITY! Just kidding its her face cheeks, her blonde hair was long and it was tied close to the bottom with a red ribbon (how I don't know) along with her tail, she had a lot of fur around her hooves like her father does it seems to run in the family. she is muscly for horse standards I guess working on an apple farm tones your muscles, she also had scars what looked like a bit mark on her back, her left shoulder had two claw marks on it and her muzzle had a cut as if hit with a blade. I didn't want to ask her and bring up some kinda dark past she had so I let it go. Her mark was three red apples (seems legit).
The next pony named Rainbow Dash who was a bit of a tom boy, she was pretty boastful and said she was the greatest flier in all of Equestria (judge by all her friends reactions she does this a lot) when I told her I had no idea who the wonderbolts are she went on explaining them to me as this amazing flight team which does amazing stunts they also act as commander's of an air force they reminded me of the blue angels I used to watch them with my grandma when I was smaller. Rainbow dash is 4'3" with a wiry build but very athletic and in shape, her hair color is amazing I asked if it was dyed and she said "Nope 100% real and 20% cooler." All six colors of the rainbow perfectly lined up tail to mane apparently its rare among ponies to have a entire spectrum of colors and was passed down from her father. her wings are slightly different than twilights wings of course they were different colored her primaries and secondary wing coverts were one color each pair of two while each of her large tail feathers have one color each, but Rainbows wings were more designed for fast flying. her pupils were also ovals like twilights but more cat-like and slit. when she showed her teeth and smiled I noticed she had canines when I asked about it Twilight informed me that pegasi (I also learned the four pony races) can eat meat but stopped doing it after awhile, her ears have darker cyan tufts on them which were adorable. Her booty mark was a cloud shooting out a yellow, red, and blue lightning bolt, I asked her what those marks on her butt meant and she said-
"Oh that's a cutie mark they define what you special talent is and who you are , I got this bad boy when I schooled two fetlock heads in a race for making fun of my friend." to which I replied
"That is the dumbest shit I've ever heard." all the ponies in the room gasped while discord was once again laughing.
"Oh I know, its so true."
"Hey what's the big idea, a cutie mark is serious to a pony," Rainbow dash said flying up into my face cause she's to short otherwise.
"Well actually, the name does sound a bit foalish when ya think about it." Applejack said.
Rainbow Dash thought about "Yeah I guess your right AJ." she holds out her hoof "Sorry about that we cool?" I bumped it "Heh, yeah we cool."
Moving along the next pony is Pinkie Pie, she pulled a freaking giant vanilla frosted cake from her satchel bag and placed it on the table and asked for my name, when I told her my name she then pulled a cake decorator from her hair with blue icing wrote my name above welcome to Equestria in perfect cursive how she did all this with hooves was a mystery, just when I thought I couldn't get ant more confused she pulls a fucking cannon out of nowhere and doesn't even light the fuse "Lets party!" she shouts as she shoots all kinds of confetti, streamers, balloons, and a banner that say welcome to Equestria. when I looked to Twilight with my mouth wide open she told me some bullshit.
"Don't worry its just Pinkie Pie being Pinkie Pie." just waved it off like she's used to it.
"How can you look at me in my face and tell me that's normal, this is not normal how did she with the and the from the how the!?"
Pinkie came out of nowhere and put her pink hoof to my mouth.
"Shhhhh, stop stalling and get on with the story silly filly."
Anywaaaay, Pinkie pie true to her name was light pink and dark pink in her mane, she's probably the shortest of the group a whopping 4'0" at the withers her body is a bit chubby (not DAMN fat but a little almost barely see it) judging by the fact that she works at a bakery called Sugarcube corner its the likely route that would take. but from the way she moves around with such energy and not break a sweat she's fitter than she looks. the way her fur outlines her it seems scruffy and curly like her mane which reminds me of cotton candy. what was confusing was when I saw the feathers on her shoulder but she's not a Pegasus. She tells me that her grandmother surprise was a Pegasus who's on her fathers side of the family which is another case of genetics. her cutie mark was three balloons two yellow one blue.
Rarity (who I have to admit was very beautiful) was an alabaster unicorn who works in a tailors shop named Carousel Boutique as soon as she saw my clothes she gasped in dramatic horror apparently green plaid is very ugly, Rarity was 4'4" at her withers, her body is very compact and solid. Her mane is purple and done in a large curl her tail is much like twilights except hers is more stylish it kinda looks like a purple tornado, her hooves are done in a manicure and she smells like she's wearing vanilla perfume, she looks like she's wearing purple mascara and her eyebrows match her hair color (that goes for all of them, I can understand the eyebrows but eye lashes?, is that there natural color?) she recommends that if I ever stop by in ponyville to come by the Carousel Boutique for new attire, I agree to meet her there when I get the chance. Rarity's cutie mark is three diamonds.
The cramp tamer Fluttershy is truly a shy pegasi, as soon as she came out of nurture mode she was hiding behind her long pink hair and rubbing her fetlocks together, don't get me started on how long it took to get her name. Fluttershy has a very slender physique with long legs and small pink hooves, Fluttershy seems to have the longest wing span in the group yet she never seems to fly except hover wonder why that is. For some reason she has the most scars out of all the group and I asked I mean how is it the shyest one out of this entire group has the most scratch and bite marks on her legs and torso. she says that she lives in a cottage near some forest called the Everfree taking care of sick and injured animals from the wilds and sometimes her animal friends lash out in fear or anger when they're in pain they always apologize afterwards, wonder what she meant by that. Her cutie mark is three pink and blue butterflies.
And last but definitely not least is Spike the dragon, what I want to know is what kind of dragon doesn't have wings he said what kind of monkey doesn't have fur. Touché, I would say that spike is at the 2'0" range in his height and that counts his light green frills or sail on the top of his head which aren't like spikes at all you can bend them as if they were hair. Twilight says that he's a baby dragon but spike claims that he's a teenager now I guess dragons bodies age slower. Spike sometimes switches from all fours to his hind legs when he chooses and he breathes green fire which is cool. Twilight practically hatched and accelerated his age from old to young when she was only twelve years old in a school for gifted unicorns which was amazing, that and she turned her parents into plants but still pretty awesome. I didn't know dragons ate gems he asked me if there were any dragons were I'm from of course the answer was no were I'm from jewels and gems are rare and hard to find.
after we all met dinner finally came via pony butlers pushing in carts with dishes who were being led by what appeared to be a griffon with an ridiculously long thin black mustache that I bet is fake, typical white bald eagles head with charcoal colored lions body, his sclera in his eyes were yellow while his irises were orange, he wore a red ribbon or scarf tied around his neck and a toque chefs hat.
"Diner is served." he announced with a French accent
The butlers lifted up the silver lids and revealed some interesting dishes, all ponies had either a salad or sandwich with hay, lettuce, tomatoes, and a flower of some sort, Discord had what I believe was written on paper in olive oil, and spike was eating rubies. I looked at my plate and there was a sandwich with hay and flowers in it, I didn't really want to eat it but I didn't want to rude besides everyone else seemed to enjoy it.
"Thank you Gustave, none of the chefs in the city Canterlot can compare to your culinary mastery even the simplest of foods made by you are extravagant." Celestia praised the griffon.
"Zat coming from you princess is an honor." Gustave bowed.
*Sigh* when in Rome.
I took a bite out of the sandwich, and immediately regretted my decision the mixture of splintering hay and the grassy taste of the flowers was enough to make me start coughing, I don't know what I was thinking I just thought maybe I should start trying new things while I'm here well look where that got me.
"Are you alright?" Fluttershy asked with concern.
I clear the hay from my mouth "Yeah I'm fine thanks for asking, humans aren't made for eating hay."
Twilight decided that now was a good time to learn a humans eating habits "What do humans eat exactly?"
this is were it gets sticky "Umm, humans eat fruit, vegetables, and other animals."
I was immediately put on the spot, everyone was looking at me
"How absolutely dreadful." Rarity covered her muzzle in disgust.
Ponies in the room were all tensed as if waiting for me to make a move.
Blueblood opens his mouth an opportunity in his grasp"I told you aunty Luna, I told you so. He admitted it himself he goes around eating foals in the dead of night, your night!" Luna rubs her face in frustration just from earing Blueblood whine.
"Blueblood I think its time for you to be excused from the table before Luna loses herself." Celestia says sternly.
Blueblood stand up from his chair with a distasteful huff, he looks over to the mare guard that first saw me in the princes bathroom "Come along Ivory, I wish to retire in my room." The mare doesn't even attempt to hide her unhappy face as she follows the prince through the large doors.
"Where did she go wrong with you?" I hear Luna say
"Calvin, Is that all?" Celestia asked with a raised eyebrow a smile.
"what, you don't care I'm an omnivore?'
She shook her head "To deal with negotiations with the different nations like the griffons and the dragons, ones perception of another's way of sustenance isn't very biased unless they eat other sentient creatures...you don't eat other sentient creatures do you?"
"No, god no only the ones that don't talk are eaten and I don't eat ponies...or griffon's."
There was a massive sigh of relief that was sent around the room.
"Gustave, do we still have any meat left in the freezer?"
Gustave rubbed his chin "I believe we have some left over from ze last nation meeting ill see what I can do." The griffon went back into the kitchen.
"So Calvin where did you live before you were pulled into Equestria?" Twilight asked
" A small town called Kingsville Texas in a house with one bedroom, and two bathrooms enough for on person."
Rarity's eyes lit up " Oh Kingsville, that sounds magnificent is it ruled by a king?" the alabaster mare wiped her mouth with a napkin
"Naw, naw its not ruled by a king we don't have a king period unless its the burger king guy that's as close as we get."
Rainbow Dash got confused. "So wait you do have a king?"
"No we don't Burger king is a restaurant whose mascot is a king."
"Oh, oh he must be the king of burgers he probably carries a magical scepter that turns anything it touches into a hay burger, and wears a long cape with a crown made completely out of burgers and then he goes around-" luckily Applejack was there to keep Pinkie from going on forever.
"The burger king is just a guy wearing a large weird helmet mask thing with that's a kings head."
"That sounds kinda creepy for a mascot." Spike has no idea
"No Ronald McDonald is a creepy mascot he's a yellow, white, and red clown with red shoes."
"Do you have a phobia of clowns?" Twilight appears to be taking notes of this conversation.
"No, I have a phobia of bugs well except small spiders, pincher bugs, and just because a nigga tryin to swat and dodge a fly does not mean he's afraid of it they're just that annoying."
"Oh they aren't that scary a lot of bugs are very sweet and they're nice they wouldn't hurt anypony unless they were in danger."
"Ah agree with Fluttershy a fly aint hurt nopony so why are ya afraid of em?"
"No its not that I'm afraid of flies its just that they are annoying but tarantula's are a different story."
"I have to agree with Calvin bugs and insects are absolutely disgusting, why one day I was simply walking through town when a grasshopper hopped into my mane oh it was terrible by the time I got it out I had already ruined my beautiful tresses."
Rainbow dash covered her mouth trying to hide her laugh "Oh yeah I remember that day you were screaming running around back and forth nopony could barely even understand you, you freaked the ponyville guards with all that screaming they all came running in to see what happened and you just kept yelling 'its in my hair its in my hair!'" Pinkie and Rainbow Dash giggled much to the unicorns distain.
The kitchen doors reopened revealing Gustave coming in with another silver platter with something that smelt good
"For you my fellow omnivore friend, honey chipotle salmon and couscous."
This I can eat, I take a fork and a knife and start cutting the salmon into pieces but before I eat I look to the others to see if they're uncomfortable.
"You guys sure you're alright with this?"
Blueblood looked like he was about to say something ignorant but Luna cut him off with a harsh stare.
"were fine aint gonna judge ya fer what ya need to survive that wouldn't be fair." The orange cowpony replied
"Go ahead darling enjoy yourself it is your party after all." Rarity said
"Yeah eat so we can party already!" The pink baker shouted.
with that I continued eating the salmon.
once we were all done eating we moved out to the ballroom, one moment it was quiet next thing I know there's a lot of dubstep and flashing colorful lights, dancing, and im just sitting in the middle of it confused.
Pinkie Pie was the DJ, Princess Twilight, Spike, Rainbow, Princess Celestia, some of the castle staff, and even a few younger guards were all dancing on the floor (however the hell small horses dance) while Applejack, Princess Luna, Rarity, Fluttershy, and Golden Delicious hung out near the punch bowl mingling and eating cake.
Dubstep not being my first choice in music (but not my last choice) and the fact that I cant dance, I make my way over to the punch bowl
"Sup."
Applejack acknowledges my response "Nuthin much were all jus sittin here cause were aint into wubstep." weird name for it but makes sense.
"Yeah I'm more of a rap type myself."
"Yer lookin at a country gal."
she points to Rarity and Fluttershy "Rares here likes listening to classical and Flutters likes smooth jazz, Ah don't know about Princess Luna though." seems legit.
"Ah'm jus glad we didn't have to come here because of some kinda major crisis."
"What you guys are some kind of elite guards or something." Like a pony A-team only not being hunted by the government.
"Naw, Nuthin like that we are element bearers."
"Element bearers?" or maybe like captain planet.
"Ah forgot yer knew to Equuis the Elements of Harmony are or were six magical gems in the form of five necklaces and a tiara each lookin a spittin image of our cutie marks. Ah'm the element of honesty, twilights the element of magic, Rarity is the element of generosity, Fluttershy is kindness, Rainbow Dash is loyalty, and Pinkie pie is laughter."
In a Pink flash the party pony herself appears " Anypony call my name?"
"No pinkie Ah was tellin Calvin here about the elements."
"Okie-dokie-loki." she bounced back over to the party.
"Sometimes Ah wonder about that girl."
"You and me both."
After the first song ended another "wubstep" song came on, Im starting to wish that I brought my I-pod with-wait I think I do have it I quickly dig in my left-hand pocket and sure enough blue I-pod Nano still in my pocket earphone and all with 78% life left. Thank you Jesus.
I plug the earphone into my ears and listen to a song.
This goes unnoticed as Princess Luna sees them in my ears "Calvin pray tell what are those in th-your ears?"
"they're earphones, they go into your ear and let you hear the music coming from this better." I said raising the Nano so she could see it.
"But were does the record go?"
"Record?, The I-pod doesn't use records."
"Then were does the music come from how do you hold it in this small device?'
"Well I don't know exactly but I do know it can hold at most 4,000 songs in here."
"4,000 SONGS!?" she fus-ro-dah'ed.
The music stops and everypony looks towards Luna who is sheepishly smiling.
"Heh heh sorry everypony."
"Its alright sister but what got you so worked up for you to use the Royal Canterlot Voice?"
"Calvin has revealed to us technology that is advanced beyond even Griffons!"
"Really now may I see?"
I hand her the music device as she levitates it to her with her golden telekinesis powers.
"How does it work?"
"Simple you put those two things in your ears and hold this up to press the button with the arrow and two bars to play or pause."
Celestia pressed down on the play button with her magic (a little to forcefully god damn) and listens to the song.
That's what would of happened if she haven't had jumped out of her skin and yelped as soon as she pressed play.
"Princess!"
the guards and Luna rushed over too Celestia who was recovering from her shock.
"Its alright everypony the volume just caught me by surprise, although some of these lyrics are a bit...appalling."
she hands me the Nano back and I quickly look at the song she listened to .
"Oh um sorry I like to listen to my music loud."
"its alright Calvin It wasn't your fault you didn't know."
Just when I thought I would be able to get back to listening to my music everyone decided to ask me a million and one questions.
"How does it work?"
"What does it do again?"
"Where do the records go?"
"Does it come in other colors?"
"How many do you have?"
"were can I get one?"
eventually I couldn't understand what any one was saying because they were all talking at the same time I couldn't even hear myself think.
"Everypony quiet!" screamed Fluttershy
everyone went quiet except for Pinkie "And he said 'its over 9000' and I was like '9000 that cant be right' and then... oops sorry."
she cowers down now that everyone was looking at her "Um I think Calvin should show us what it does since its his."
"Thank you Fluttershy, Pinkie is there any way to amplify this so everypony can hear it?"
Pinkie pie looks at the Nano with an scrutinizing eye until a light bulb literally appeared over her head "Aha I got it!"
She pushes me over to the DJ stand and pointed her hoof to a little plug thing (I don't know the name for it) that looked designed for an I-pod aux outlet.
"You can plug in your doo-hickey here if it fits"
I plug it in with no problems and begin flicking through songs.
"No,no,no,no,no,no, yes."
"Tell me Pinkie do yall have rap, hip-hop, and R&B here in Equestria?"
"Yep,yep, yep it originated in Manehatten."
ignoring the pony pun I press play and let the music play.
there is a diverse reaction one half Luna, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Spike, and surprisingly Fluttershy seemed to like it, while Rarity, Applejack, and Golden Delicious weren't into it, Twilight, and Celestia bopped they're heads some but that's it.
when the song was over ponies cheered and clapped (clopped?) they're hooves.
"That was an awesome song that sounded different from the hip-hop I've heard, what's that group called?"
"Wutang." I said.
"Wutang?"
"Of course Wutang everypony knows they aint Nuthin to rut with."
Rarity gasped "Pinkie pie language!"
"What its true!?"
"I do find these Wutang to be very entertaining do you have more songs for us?"
"Of course I do." I play the next song Duel of The Iron Mic. And with that I became the DJ for the afternoon I played Rap new and old but don't get me wrong I played other songs to.
"This song is beautiful who sings it?" Rarity asked.
"John Legend, and I like this song too."
After a while I simply put the songs on a random shuffle and just listened to them thinking about what im gonna do next, where am I gonna live here, is there anyway for me to return back to were I belong?
"Calvin would you like for me and Luna to show you how we lift the moon and lower the sun?" Luna snapped me out of my stupor
"Yeah I'd like to see that." I said not really caring there's no way they can lift a star its impossible although a lot of impossible things have happened with me being here for only a day.
Everyone moves outside to the balcony to watch the "amazing spectacle" of the pony princess, meanwhile I was looking at the scenery of the city Canterlot it reminded me of this this small song from a game I played back on earth.
Celestia's horn began to glow its golden glow as she closed her eyes in concentration and as she did with my amazement she made the sun lower its self from the horizon, then Luna's horn glowed a blue hue and raised the moon before my very eyes and not only did she raise the moon but she added stars thousands upon thousands of stars it almost look like a painting.
"How did you both do this?" I asked in awe
"It's all done with the power of magic it flows through everyponies veins, don't humans have magic?" I shook my head.
"No only illusions and cheap tricks, but no real magic that was only in fairytales."
when Twilight hears some information she has to have more cause it just isn't enough princess of magic my ass Twilights the princess of knowledge.
Celestia clears hear throat which gains everyone's attention "Im sure that you'll have as much time as you need to ask Calvin about his home world when you all get back to your homes in Ponyville tonight.
Pinkie Pie gasp "He's coming to Ponyville?, then that means I get to throw you another party!" she says with excitement.
It seems everypony is excited for me to come with them to Ponyville as lazy as the name is it does sound pretty homely, Soon everyone is done packing me being first because all I have are the clothes on my back and my I-pod. now we are all waving goodbye to the Princesses, Golden Delicious, and Discord as we journey off to the train station through the city of Canterlot which is just as beautiful below as it was above.
Luckily there wasn't many of ponies outside or I might of started a panic all throughout the city, the train booth was more complicated though it took Twilight and Spike awhile to keep the ticket mare in the booth from crapping herself in her seat (am I really that scary to them?) we board onto the train with a few other ponies who also seem to be afraid of me but with twilight and the element bearers there I guess that calmed them down.
"Its gonna take at least three hours to get back to ponyville down the mountain so you might as well catch some sleep now." Twilight said.
"You don't have to tell me twice." Rainbow Dash falls into a booth and curls up into a ball which was one of the cutest things I've seen in my life.
I sit down in a booth across from Rainbows close to the window to see more of the scenery, Applejack sits next to me while twilight and pinkie pie share they're booth behind me, Rarity and Spike sit in front of me, Fluttershy sits next to Rainbow Dash.
As the train begins to pull off the station I try and stay awake to see the lands of Equestria but instead find that my eyelids begin to feel like heavy lead curtains, I rest my head on the window.
"What the fuck im sleeping on a colorful train with a bunch of colorful ponies what is my life coming to?" with that thought I fall asleep.
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I LOVE THIS STORY BRO 10/10
4626021 Thanks
Kinda OOC for her to react like this when she hears that Calvin eats meat
I have noticed a few small grammatical errors in the story, like using are instead of our, and theyre instead of their. Nothing too big or storybreaking. Keep up the good work
Umm, you have a distinct tendency to not start sentences or paragraphs off with a capital letter, FYI.