11. Condemnation
Photo Frenzy couldn’t stop pacing even if he wanted—and what he wanted was give his editor a nice sock across the jaw. But that wasn’t how he wanted to remembered. He wanted to be known for his integrity—such as it was, working for a two-bit gossip rag—and so he found himself skipping breakfast and racing to the office the moment he read the morning edition.
A morning edition that should’ve been his crowning triumph. Now it was his greatest shame. Yes, he’d been complicit in stories like this before, but rarely against somepony so decent—and certainly never when it involved somepony he’d come to like.
“Honestly, I don’t know what you were expecting,” said Daily Edition from behind the comfort of his desk. He paused to take a sip from his mug of coffee, then stared at Frenzy over the brim. “You know the old saying. ‘If it bleeds, it leads.’ A royal scandal’s got far more juice than some posh little story about weather control.”
“Then why’d you send me out there?” Frenzy demanded. He stopped pacing long enough to stare down the other stallion, who looked back at the coffee in his hooves. “All you’d have to do was say, ‘Sink or swim, Frenzy’ and then give the story to one of the newbies on staff. You’d have gotten the same story that you printed without wasting time for a last-minute rewrite.”
Ed frowned. “Hardly last-minute. Script Seller and her team gave their very best on that copy.”
“Oh, please, Ed. That page has your hoofprints written all over it!”
“Well, the managing editor’s allowed to contribute, you know…”
Frenzy’s rear legs twitched and he almost went back to his furious pacing. But he knew better this time. It wouldn’t accomplish anything. None of his screaming would.
He was looking at an editor who’d made up his mind about this story and wouldn’t retract it. And Frenzy knew then that there was really nothing more that the Trottingham Tattler could offer him. Not even front-row seats to the next Wonderbolts race. Not even a two-minute interview with the one and only Soarin.
“Well, congratulations.” Frenzy offered Ed a frosty smile. “You’ve contributed to the biggest story this paper’s ever seen.”
Ed beamed. “That’s the spirit—”
“And on that note, I’d like to offer my resignation.” Frenzy bowed his head and turned toward the door.
“Now, wait just a minute!” Ed scrambled from behind his desk, almost tipping over his coffee. “Think before you do something you’ll regret, Photo Frenzy.” He placed a warm hoof on the young photographer’s shoulder. “I know you’ve struggled with this job from time to time—”
Try every single day, Frenzy thought glumly.
“—But I really think your career’s just getting started. I mean, it’s your name on the photo credit on this story. Ponies everywhere are going to see it! You’ll be getting requests for interviews and feature stories soon enough.”
“But not for anything good,” Frenzy insisted. He turned and studied Ed for a minute. Then, as he nodded, he added, “Not yet, anyway.”
“Er, what?”
“Never mind. It’s nothing you need to concern yourself about. Take care, Ed.”
“Really, Frenzy. I wish you’d reconsider this.”
“Oh, I am.” He chuckled. “I’m reconsidering the bone-headed decision to ever take this job.”
Frenzy pushed the door open, letting his editor’s hoof slip from his shoulder. He trotted across the newspaper office, ignoring the surprised stares from his would-be colleagues and the polite coughs from Script Seller, who’d stopped typing for a moment. Frenzy gave her a quick wink before he headed out the front door.
No point in delaying any longer. This story wasn’t over yet.
Several minutes later, Photo Frenzy had made his way back home. The tiny cottage he called home had always felt dark and cramped, but in light of quitting his job, the place had an eerie vibe. He could just imagine the ghosts of poor farmers or tailors who’d lived there, eating their ghostly breakfast at the table and giving him a judging stare. Which was fortunate because, in his haste, he’d forgotten to eat. Frenzy wolfed down a slice of buttered toast and then got to work.
In half an hour, his saddlebags were packed and he was trotting out the front door. As he left, there was a slight spring in his step. Frenzy was used to packing in a hurry and catching the train to somewhere new for the sake of a story. But this time would be different. He could feel it—a happy surge running from mane to tail.
Outside, the good ponies of Trottingham were abuzz with the latest news. Everywhere he went, Frenzy saw mares huddling around their own copies of the Tattler, remarking in hushed tones about the scandal.
“Oh my, isn’t it dreadful…?”
“Yes, truly dreadful, breaking a marefriend’s heart like that…”
“And in full view of the public, no less! Simply horrible…”
Frenzy grit his teeth and turned his trot into a full-fledged gallop across town. He didn’t stop until he found himself at Mayflower Station. Ignoring the sight of yet more ponies reading that awful newspaper, he forced his way through the crowds of tourists and travelers until he made his jagged way to the ticket booth.
A pink-colored mare smiled at him as he approached. “Good morning! Where to, sir?”
Reaching into his saddlebags, Frenzy took out a small stack of bits and slid it over the counter to the mare. He tried to match her smile and answered, “One ticket to the Crystal Empire, please.”
The mare’s eyes flashed with surprise, but she took the bits anyway. “Ooh, you’d better hurry then. The northbound train is leaving in less than five minutes!”
Frenzy laughed. “That suits me just fine.”
For barely a second, time went completely still.
Twilight allowed herself a single moment of serious panic. Her tail tucked itself between her legs and she felt the hairs on her mane shiver and rise of their own accord. Two picoseconds later, she was experiencing a complete body spasm as the same chain of thoughts danced around her brain: What have I done? Dear Celestia, what have I done? I’ve ruined everything, I’ve ruined everything, oh please no—
Then the second ended and Twilight snapped down on her emotions with the crushing weight of logic. Good old rational thinking. Even in a crisis, she could always count on it.
Alright, Twilight told herself, go to basic syllogisms.
In the depths of her mind, in the span of another eternal second, she conjured up that familiar green chalkboard and began to scribble furiously across it.
Photo Frenzy didn’t keep his end of the bargain.
Everypony thinks that I’m cheating on Rarity with Fluttershy.
Everypony will be going after Fluttershy now.
∴ I need to get Fluttershy somewhere safe before she has a total breakdown.
∴ I need to get Rarity away from the press immediately thereafter.
∴ I need to arrange an emergency meeting with Princess Celestia.
“Spike!” she called out, surfacing from her mental depths.
The little dragon fell back onto his rear in alarm. “Y-yes, Twilight?”
“Hop on and hold on tight.”
Spike winced. He knew full well what that phrase implied. “Okay…”
He dutifully climbed onto Twilight’s back and wrapped his little arms around her neck for support. Twilight was already running rapid calculations in her head as she prepared the teleportation spell. She’d pulled off more powerful spells at greater distances before, but it was hard to keep focused when she felt the stress and terror bubbling deep inside her stomach. Her subconscious was berating her non-stop for letting down both her marefriends before she’d even had breakfast.
But all she had to do was focus on the image of Fluttershy’s tear-stricken face and off they went in a burst of light.
Spots danced across Twilight’s eyes as the light faded. She shook her head, clearing her vision in time to see a menagerie of upset animals staring back at her. Blinking again, Twilight realized that she was standing in Fluttershy’s living room. The light from her spell had faded so quickly that she nearly didn’t catch on how dark the cottage was.
Every blind and curtain had been pulled shut, and all the lights were turned down. All of Fluttershy’s animals were gathered in the living room, making as little noise as they could. Twilight stared at the bears, raccoons, birds, and mice that littered the floor in a loose huddle. They stared back, recognizing her and showing nothing but muted worry on their faces.
“Um…” Twilight struggled to recall how her marefriend would’ve handled this. The fact that she wasn’t already comforting them was cause for concern. “It’s… going to be all right, everypony. If you could point me toward Fluttershy, I’m sure we’ll get this sorted out soon.”
None of the critters responded. Twilight wished she’d spent more time reading up on animal calls.
Fortunately, she didn’t have to try. A familiar patter from behind caught her attention. Twilight turned around and saw Angel Bunny hopping anxiously toward her. He leapt into the air, waving his paws and pointing upstairs.
“Her bedroom?” asked Twilight. When the little rabbit nodded, she said, “All right. Let’s go.”
Spike trailed after Twilight as she followed Angel upstairs, creating a reassuring thump-thump of footsteps behind her. It was dark, so Twilight relied on the glow from her horn to light the way. Of course, by the time she reached the upstairs bedroom, her magical reserves had begun to reach their limit.
“Whoa there,” said Spike. He reached out a claw and nudged Twilight as she slid into him. “You feeling okay?”
“I’m… not sure.” Twilight blinked and paused at the head of the stairs. “Maybe I should’ve eaten before we came.”
Now that she was here, Twilight was starting to think maybe she’d overreacted. It was dangerous for a magic-user to neglect the essentials of a good night’s sleep, regular eating habits, and daily mental exercise. She’d usually done well on two out of the three. It was always remembering to eat where she tripped up. If not for Spike’s constant reminders, she’d be as skinny as a post.
“We’ll get something in the kitchen,” Spike answered. He nudged Twilight with his elbow. “Let’s at least check in on Fluttershy.”
The image of a pegasus sobbing alone in her bedroom nearly brought tears to Twilight’s eyes. She wiped at her face with her hoof and nodded. “You’re right, Spike. I can always count on you, can’t I?”
Spike stayed silent—another worrying sign, given his propensity for smartaleck quips. Twilight trotted ahead to the bedroom door, where Angel was already waiting.
She raised her hoof and knocked. “Fluttershy?”
Only silence greeted her.
“Shy? It’s me, Twilight.” She glanced at the little dragon beside her. “It’s just me and Spike. Can we talk?”
The silence grew longer and heavier.
“I’m sorry about what they wrote in the paper. Really, I am!”
At last, she heard a very faint sniffle, followed by a muffled squeak. Twilight’s heart was pounding hard against her chest. She pressed her hoof to the door and gently pushed it open.
The inside of the bedroom was just as dark as rest of the cottage. To Twilight’s surprise, the bed was neatly made and the floor looked like it had been swept. She could still hear a trail of quiet sniffles and sobs coming from somewhere in the room, but all Twilight could see were long shadows stretching over everything.
“I’m sorry…” a very soft voice whispered from underneath the bed.
Twilight knelt down beside the bed. At last she found Fluttershy, wrapped up in a blanket with her tail tucked between her legs and her face shrouded by her long mane. The only thing that could’ve made her seem even more pitiful would be if somepony were playing a sad piano melody in the background.
“You didn’t do anything wrong, Shy.” Twilight waved Spike back as she crawled under the bed. It was a tight fit, but she managed it anyway. “It’s the press that made up the story, not you.”
“B-but they saw the kiss,” Fluttershy blubbered. She sniffled and wiped her nose with the back of her hoof. “Th-they all think… they all think I’m breaking you and Rarity up and it’s all my fault…”
Twilight extended her forelegs and pulled Fluttershy against her chest. She didn’t mind the tears that now soaked into her coat or the pink hairs that fell over her cheeks. All she could do was lie on her side, hold Fluttershy while she wept, and caress her back.
“You did nothing wrong,” Twilight insisted. “I’ll talk to the press. I’ll make them understand. I don’t care if they get upset about the trio.” She pushed Fluttershy’s head up so she could look down into her tear-filled eyes. “Even if I wasn’t a princess, I still would never apologize for the ponies that I love. That means you and Rarity.”
Leaning forward, Twilight kissed Fluttershy softly on the lips. The pegasus didn’t respond at first, but then she let out a tired squeal and kissed her back. Then she collapsed against Twilight with a sigh, her cheeks turning red even in the shadows.
“Um, guys?” Spike knelt down beside the bed, waving to get their attention. “I’d hate to ruin the moment, but there’s somepony knocking at the door.”
Twilight’s stomach curlded at the thought of having to face the press so soon, but she knew there was no way around it. She let out a sigh and summoned up the energy for one more teleport.
In a flash, she and Fluttershy were downstairs in the midst of several anxious critters. A chorus of tweets, growls, and yelps welcomed them as the animals crowded around Fluttershy. She offered a tiny smile and whispered her thanks to the squirrels that offered her an acorn and to the kitten that rubbed itself against her leg.
Twilight helped Fluttershy back onto her hooves and gently removed the blanket from her shoulders. She looked her marefriend over, easily imagining the terror in her eyes when they faced a horde of reporters and photographers on her doorstep. But seeing her in the midst of her beloved critters, Twilight remembered that Fluttershy wasn’t that weak. She was strong when it counted and Twilight needed that strength now more than ever.
Meanwhile, somepony was continuing to knock at the door. Oddly polite for paparazzi, but Twilight didn’t put it past them. She drew a deep breath and let it out slowly before facing Fluttershy again.
“Take my hoof,” said Twilight. “We’ll do this together.”
Fluttershy nodded meekly and took Twilight’s hoof into her own. They walked side by side to the front door, as Twilight reached for the top lock with her magic.
As soon as the latch moved, the whole door swung open and a sparkling white projectile shot into the cottage. Twilight and Fluttershy ducked as the projectile collapsed into a heap on the living room sofa, finally taking shape as a very nervous and hard-breathing unicorn in a heavy black cloak.
“Oh, thank goodness you’re both here!” Rarity exclaimed. She paused to swallow and catch her breath, letting the cloak fall from her shoulders. Twilight did a double-take when she saw the frayed hairs poking up from the surface of her mane.
Rarity, of all ponies, leaving the house without a perfect coiffure? This really was a disaster.
“I… I’m under siege at the boutique!” Rarity trotted over to Fluttershy’s side, wrapping her forelegs around the pegasus and nuzzling her gently. “It’s simply awful, girls! They’re flashing pictures of me every chance they get and following Sweetie Belle to school! Oh, I know I’ve longed for the limelight, but not like this! I’d never have asked for this!”
Twilight looked back over her shoulder, suddenly realizing that the door was still wide open. She used her magic to slam it shut and lock it up again. No sense in taking chances. If Rarity had managed to elude the reporters at home, they’d soon enough pick up her scent and follow her all the way to the cottage.
“Pony feathers!” Twilight swore.
Fluttershy and Rarity jumped at the remark, which made Twilight blush. “I’m sorry,” she added, taking a deep breath. “It’s… it’s been quite a morning for all of us. And I hate to admit it, but I don’t think we’re going to find a moment’s peace anywhere in Ponyville.”
“But where can we go?” Fluttershy asked. She clung to Rarity the same way a filly would cling to her teddy bear—and Twilight knew perfectly well that Fluttershy was one of the few grown mares to still sleep with a teddy bear.
Twilight sat down and thought it over. She wished she could go to Sugarcube Corner or Sweet Apple Acres, but everypony in town knew those places. The media would only end up dragging all their friends and families into the mess. And as much as she wanted to give Photo Frenzy and his editor a good kick in the flank for the trouble they’d caused, Twilight knew hiding out in a small town like Trottingham wouldn’t help either. Those ponies ate up gossip rag stories even worse than the folks in Ponyville.
That left only the Crystal Empire or Canterlot. Twilight knew that Shining Armor and Cadance would welcome her with open hooves and no questions asked, but at this particular moment, they’d be busy with setting up the very first Crystal Empire Winter Gala. They deserved nothing but good press coverage for such an occasion, not having to worry about a crazed sister-in-law and her marefriends bringing a royal scandal with them.
“Okay,” said Twilight. “Canterlot, it is.”
Rarity frowned. “I beg your pardon?”
Twilight got up and went over to the two other mares, looking them both in the eye. She hoped she was giving off an air of reassurance instead of the anxiety that bubbled deep inside her. “I think the best thing we can do right now is go straight to Canterlot. We’ll take refuge at the Royal Palace, where no journalist could ever hope of getting inside without permission.”
“But…” Fluttershy pointed at her critters. “What about them? I can’t leave them on their own!”
“And don’t forget about Sweetie Belle!” Rarity insisted. “She deserves to be somewhere safe from all this madness!”
Twilight kept up her smile even while her brain was processing those questions at a rapid pace. Her mental chalkboard was gone now, replaced by a bulletin board with multiple notes pinned to the surface, connected by a web of bright red string for simple, logical maneuvering. Here was a link to the farm and there was a link to Carousel Boutique. And here was where the Cutie Mark Crusaders came in and…
“T-Twilight?” Fluttershy waved her hoof in front of her face. “Are you all right?”
Blinking, Twilight looked at the pegasus in surprise. “Hmm? Oh, yes, I’m fine. Just thinking.” She coughed into her hoof and added, “I think I’ve got it. I’ll need some ink and paper. I’ve got a lot of notes to send to Spike…”
Wiping the sweat from her brow, Applejack came to a stop at the front porch of her house. She gratefully accepted a glass from lemonade from Granny Smith and took a long, refreshing drink. Autumn was still going strong, but all that work for the last stages of the harvest meant anypony would work up a powerful sweat in no time at all. A nice cold drink was just what the doctor ordered.
“A.J.! Hey, Applejack!”
While she was a touch miffed at having to ignore the rest of her nice lemonade, Applejack turned to the side, where Rainbow Dash was swooping in for a landing. The pegasus bolted free from the tiny dust cloud she’d created and hoofed it straight onto the porch, breathing hard and fast.
“Whoa nelly!” Applejack took hold of her marefriend by the shoulders, surprised at the sudden weight of Dash leaning into her. “Ease up there, darlin’. Now what’s gotcha in such a hurry?”
Rainbow Dash shook off a fresh coat of dust and went back to hovering beside Applejack. “I got a note from Spike. We want us to meet him and Pinkie over at Sugarcube Corner.”
Applejack’s ears dropped. “I’m guessing this is about Twi, Shy, and Rarity.”
“Yup!”
“They just up and left, didn’t they?”
“Teleported out first thing this morning!”
Applejack glanced back at the porch, where Granny Smith was still enjoying her lemonade in peace. “Can’t say I’d blame ’em. I’d wanna spare my kin the misery of those goshdarned reporters snooping around the farm on my account.”
But even as she said that, she felt the slightest pang in her chest. It hurt Applejack that she couldn’t be there for three of her best friends. Even with her family to think of, she’d go to the ends of Equestria for any one of her friends. But Twilight had to know what she was doing. She took herself and her girls out of the picture so they’d get some peace—and with any luck, the local press wouldn’t go after Applejack and the rest of their friends either.
I believe in ya, Twilight, Applejack thought, almost forming it into a prayer. Now you go and show me how this all gets fixed, ya hear?
“All righty,” Applejack finally said. “I’m guessing we’ve gotta get to Pinkie and Spike, then. You reckon we can do that without drawing half the Ponyville press on our tail?”
Rainbow Dash grinned. “Yeah we can!” She punctuated her words with a faux karate chop through the air. “Last time I was at Wonderbolts Camp, Spitfire showed me this awesome move where you make a moving fog! The old Bolts used to make ’em for sneak attacks and scouting missions and other cool stuff!”
It sounded more like some idea from a Daring Do novel, but Applejack decided not to press the matter. “And you reckon you can make this happen?”
“Can I?” Rainbow Dash executed a side roll through the air and landed on all four hooves. She flashed a smirk and said, “What do you think, A.J.?”
Applejack throught she was crazy, but truthfully, she liked that quality in her marefriend. A little zest in her otherwise stressful life.
“I think, sugarcube,” Applejack said as a smile slowly crossed her face, “that if there’s a pony crazy enough to make that happen, it’s you.”
While Rainbow Dash laughed and flew up into the air to create the fog, Applejack turned around and trotted back to the porch. She waved to catch Granny Smith’s attention.
“Now, Granny, Dash and I’ll be back before ya know it. We’re gonna head out to Pinkie’s place and figure out what the hay we’re doing next.” Then, as a dark throught crossed her mind, she leaned in and added, “And whatever you do, don’t ya dare tell none of them ponies from the press where we are or what Twilight’s up to, ya hear?”
“Oh, heavens to Betsy, Applejack!” Granny Smith replied with a sour look. “I ain’t nearly that addle-brained at my age! Why, I done forgot more about protectin’ our family’s privacy than you’ll ever know!”
“Really? Like what?”
“Well, I don’t know!” Granny scowled. “I’ve just told ya I’ve forgotten, now didn’t I?”
Yet again, Applejack’s confidence in her elder was dropping fast, but she reminded herself that a mare as old as her didn’t turn out so good without doing a few things right in life. She let out a quiet breath and nodded. “I reckon you’re right, Granny. Well, the farm’s in your hooves. Tell Big Mac we’re gonna be back real soon.”
Granny Smith settled back into her rocking chair and took another sip of lemonade. “Sure will!”
Turning away from the house, Applejack gave Rainbow Dash’s project a quick lookover. In under a minute, the daredevil had managed to grab one of the small gray clouds from overhead and whip it up into a fine gray mist that skirted across the ground. In this crazy weather, nopony was going to take notice of a wave of fog rolling through town.
Even so, Applejack couldn’t help but eye the non-pony-made fog that lay over her precious orchards in the distance, where Big Mac was still hard at work. She prayed that Twilight and Princess Celestia would come up with a solution for that, too. She didn’t think her crops could survive a winter as bad as this—and that thought terrified her more than anything else.
“Let’s roll, A.J.!” Rainbow Dash bounced off a low-flying cloud and into the top layer of fog. Applejack caught a glimpse of her wings and tail poking through the fog, but only because she knew where to look.
She let out a deep breath and stepped into the mist.
Twilight smiled with relief as a plate of blueberry scones was placed on the table in front of her. She turned and offered her thanks to the white mare with glasses who’d done her this kindness.
“Think nothing of it, Princess,” said Raven. She bowed her head. “As Principal Private Secretary, I am here to be of service to all royalty.”
Sitting to Twilight’s right, Fluttershy examined the fresh steaming cup of tea that Raven had just poured for her. “I-I hope we’re not intruding—”
“Not at all, my little ponies.” Princess Celestia’s warm voice rippled through the air from the other side of the table, where she sipped at her own tea. Her gentle tone blended with the trickling water from the fountain in the corner of the royal atrium. “As my staff will tell anypony who asks, you three were already invited to the palace today for afternoon tea.”
Rarity exchanged an uncertain look with Twilight. “Er, forgive me, Your Highness, but I don’t believe you could’ve known we were coming so soon in advance.”
Celestia chuckled. “On the contrary, Rarity. Your visit had been arranged and planned for in accordance with my daily schedule. It’s clearly on record for all to see.”
Something about the Princess’s tone bothered Twilight. “Is it, though?”
As she sipped at her tea, Celestia winked. “It will be soon enough.”
Once again, Twilight could only marvel at the grace at which her mentor was handling this turn of events. She hadn’t reacted with alarm when Twilight, Rarity, and Fluttershy suddenly appeared inside the palace’s southeast corridor, only ten minutes ahead of the tour group that was scheduled to pass through there. Celestia had simply ushered the three mares into her private audience chamber and left instructions for her guards to keep them out of view until all scheduled tours were concluded.
When Raven had come for them, she didn’t seem the least bit concerned about their presence. She’d led them to the royal atrium and offered them tea and scones with Celestia, acting as though this was perfectly normal. Twilight had to admit she was grateful for the trees and hanging vines that surrounded the atrium, creating a very effective sight and sound barrier that no journalist, no matter how daring, would ever dream of trying to breach. Not unless they wanted to be thrown into a dungeon or banished.
Of course, now that she had time to think about it, Twilight was starting to wonder if Celestia really did have any dungeons in which to throw troublemaking ponies. She knew that vicious beasts like Tirek were imprisoned deep in the pits of Tartarus, but that seemed a touch extreme for somepony who’d stolen a loaf of bread or assaulted a neighbor in an argument.
“Now then,” said Celestia, lowering her cup back into its saucer. “I believe we were discussing this matter with the Trottingham Tattler. Raven?”
The diminutive secretary nodded before turning to address Twilight and her friends. “Our press secretary has already spoken with the editor. He says Photo Frenzy quit early this morning and took a train out of town. No one knows where.”
“That’s strange,” said Twilight. She couldn’t quite figure out Frenzy’s angle. Was he sorry for what he’d done or was he only trying to save his own hide?
That was a mystery that could wait. She’d much rather focus on how to fix this mess.
“In any case,” Raven continued, “it seems that we may be able to deliver a libel suit against the paper for insinuating an affair with Fluttershy.” She glanced at Fluttershy, who slid down in her chair, before adding, “However, that itself may prove… difficult.”
“But it’s simply not true!” Rarity protested. “Twilight is certainly not cheating on me with Fluttershy!”
“Quite, but allow me to ask this, Miss Rarity.” Raven reached up to adjust her glass as she turned to the other unicorn. “Would telling everypony the truth about your relationship do you any good?”
“Well, I…” Rarity’s bravado was suddenly absent, replaced by cringing concern. “Er, that is, I’m sure it’s not best that everypony knows about…”
“It’s nopony’s business but our own,” Twilight insisted. She flashed Rarity a quick smile and put her foreleg around Fluttershy’s shoulders. “I don’t see why everypony should be so eager to know the details of my love life anyway.”
Celestia chuckled around a mouthful of scone. She floated a napkin to wipe at her lips and favored Twilight with a tender smile. “My dear Twilight Sparkle, I’m afraid such troubles come with the territory of being a celebrity. Ponies want to distract themselves from all their daily troubles with gossip and scandals. It gives them a vicarious pleasure to read about all the joys and miseries of other ponies—including members of royalty.”
Twilight shook her head. “I can’t imagine anypony doing that to you, though.”
Again, Celestia laughed. “After a thousand years, I’ve simply grown used to it. The press has been speculating about every aspect of my life. I’ve been accused of engineering my sister’s banishment in a coup d’etat and having a harem of mares and stallions for my own twisted pleasures. There’s really nothing in the papers that could surprise me anymore.”
“But… but that’s horrible!”
“It is, but it’s also inevitable. Ponies will talk when they don’t have anything else to latch onto.” Celestia tilted her head and smiled at Rarity. “Tell me, do you occasionally find gossip amusing to read?”
“Er, on occasion, yes.” Then, without warning, Rarity smacked her hoof on the table. “But not in this case! It’s outrageous that they’d accuse poor Fluttershy and Twilight of such things!”
Fluttershy reached out and rubbed at Rarity’s back. As the unicorn dropped her head and smiled in relief, Fluttershy turned to the Princess. “It, um, does seem strange that anypony would accept this story at face value, if you don’t mind me saying.”
“I agree.” Celestia took a small bite from her scone and chewed slowly, savoring every second of it. When she swallowed, she asked, “But can any of you tell me what else you can do? Running away from the press won’t change anything. A scandal remains a scandal unless proven otherwise, even after many years have passed and everypony’s forgotten about it.”
It was a hard truth, but Twilight was beginning to see the wisdom in her words. Somepony as old as Celestia had the patience of eons to withstand any public criticism or moral panic. But she could also see that Celestia didn’t surround herself with lovers or get caught in public kissing somepony she shouldn’t have. As the oldest Princess in the land, nopony could argue that she knew how to control her own press coverage.
Twilight accepted that she would have to do the same. Hiding away in cottages and palaces would only delay the inevitable confrontation with the press.
I just hope that Spike and the girls back home will manage for now, she prayed.
Meanwhile, Twilight smiled at Raven as the secretary poured her another cup of tea. Her plan of action could wait. After a stressful morning, afternoon tea with her marefriends and Celestia was the best experience she could’ve asked for.
Under the cover of Rainbow Dash’s fog, the two ponies stood at the back door to Sugarcube Corner. They passed inside without a word, shooting quick glances to either side of the road just in case anypony was watching. But as far as Applejack could tell, there weren’t many ponies outside. As the day dragged on, the skies had only gotten darker and the air smelled of fresh rain, carried by a very heavy wind.
Not even the paparazzi were foolish enough to risk getting sick or soaking wet for the sake of a royal scandal, it seemed.
Applejack knocked at the door as Rainbow Dash settled onto the ground beside her. The door opened and Mr. Cake stuck his head out. He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw the two mares and held the door open.
“Come on inside, girls,” he said. “Pinkie’s upstairs. We figured you’d want some privacy.”
“Much obliged, Mr. Cake,” Applejack replied. She wouldn’t forget this kindness and resolved to bake a nice apple pie or two for the Cake family when all this was over.
Meanwhile, Rainbow Dash led the way upstairs, giving the whole bakery a quick scan to make sure some snooping gossipmonger wasn’t hanging around. Applejack never got why Rainbow was so eager to scout out every place they visited, performing “ocular patdowns” as she liked to call them. However, this was one time Applejack was grateful for such habits.
Upstairs, they made their way into Pinkie Pie’s bedroom. The party pony was already lying on her stomach on the floor, coloring in a book with crayons while Spike sat by himself on the bed, surrounded by stacks of papers and notes. The little dragon wore a green visor over his eyes as he scrutinized each paper, scribbling a note every few seconds.
“Hey, girls!” Pinkie waved at the two mares as they entered the room. “Welcome to Pinkie Pie’s Crazy Cool Clandestine Meeting! No nosy reporters allowed!”
“I keep telling you it doesn’t need a name,” Spike growled. He dropped another paper onto the bed and picked up a fresh sheet, onto which he started writing. “It’s good to see you guys. I know it must be tough getting around in this weather.”
Rainbow Dash laughed. “Heck, this weather? I could take a nap in these thunderclouds no problem!”
“And then you’d be cowering under my sheets at the first crack of lightning,” Applejack replied.
The pegasus rolled her eyes. “Arrgh! It was one time, A.J.!”
“And then you wouldn’t leave for a whole hour!”
“Well, I mean…” Rainbow Dash’s smile quirked to the side, looking very suggestive. “Neither would you…”
Applejack blushed. “Maybe this isn’t the best time for that.”
“Aww, but you guys!” Pinkie whined. She spread her forelegs out in confusion. “I thought the whole point of this was to have an awesome slumber party!”
“Sorry, Pinkie, but we’ve got other things to take care of first,” said Spike as he jumped off the bed. “The way Twilight left things, we’ve got to make sure that everything gets taken care of while they’re out of town. That means looking after the library, looking after Sweetie Belle and Rarity’s shop, and making sure all of Fluttershy’s animals are fed and cleaned up.”
Rainbow Dash let out a low whistle. “That’s a lot for one pony.”
“Which is why we’re all pitching in,” Applejack reminded her. She glanced at Spike. “I reckon you’ve got the library in good claws?”
“Yeah.” Spike blushed. “A-and Sweetie Belle’s asked if she could stay with me. Just until this whole thing blows over, you know.”
Applejack slid a glance at Rainbow Dash, who hid her chuckle behind a raised hoof. She couldn’t resist a teasing smile herself. It wasn’t like the dragon’s feelings for that filly were much of a secret anyhow. Still, to spare him any embarrassment, Applejack nodded and said, “Sounds fine to me. Now what about them critters at Fluttershy’s place?”
“I’ll take good care of them!” Pinkie squealed, bouncing to her hooves in a single bound. “I know what every critter wants is a nice bubbly bath and a big old batch of treats!”
Rainbow Dash shot Applejack a worried glance. “Um, maybe you could help Pinkie with the animals? I’d offer to help, but I, uh… I’ve got weather duty.”
Applejack smiled. “Sure thing, sugarcube. Just so happens we’re about done with the harvest, so I might as well stay busy somehow.”
“Great. That just leaves Rarity’s shop,” Spike added, looking down at the notes on Pinkie’s bed. “Rarity told Twilight that she can afford to wait a few days on her latest dress orders, but somepony needs to check on the boutique every day. Make sure Opal gets fed and that nopony tries to break in.”
Considering that Rarity was a fellow businesspony, Applejack could appreciate that sentiment. It wasn’t just the thought of a burglar forcing their way into her home that was so worrying, but all the bits they made from a hard day’s work being at risk as well. And she could only imagine how much money Rarity pulled in every week on all those fancy dress orders from all over Equestria.
“Rainbow Dash,” said Applejack, “I figure you oughta keep an eye on the boutique, seeing as it’s under your flight path anyhow. And Sweetie Belle might as well bring Opal to the library, if that’s all right with ya, Spike.”
Spike chewed at the end of his quill. “Hmm. It’ll be tough trying to keep Opal and Owlowiscious from chasing each other all the time, but at least Sweetie Belle can keep on eye on her cat.” He nodded and made another note. “Fair enough. Anypony else got an idea?”
“Ooh, ooh! How about we make a giant cake in the town square and—”
“Pinkie, for the last time!” Spike slid a claw down the side of his face. “We are not going to lure the press away with the promise of endless birthday cake.”
Pinkie Pie grinned. “Oh, I know! I’m just saying we oughta get some cake!” Then, after a gasp, she added, “Or better yet, cupcakes!” She trotted past the little dragon and out of the room. “Anypony else want some?”
“Heck yeah!” Rainbow Dash did a backflip through the air and flew after Pinkie.
Applejack sighed and settled onto her haunches. “Well, heavens to Betsy. Guess we got our work cut out for us, huh?”
Spike nodded. “It’s gonna be an interesting few days, that’s for sure.”
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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AJ and Pinkie will watch over FS' babies, Rainbow Dash will keeps an eye out for the Carousel Boutique, and Spike will pet-sit Opal and Owlowisicious and love-sit Sweetie Belle.
RAINBOW NO, ITS A TRAP!!!
This is so good even I'm having a hard time finding something to comment on at this point, literally a page turner
Except for the anxiety attacks, that is, in the most intense parts where I imagine the worst