The Curse of A Well-Read Man

by LeoneHaxor

Interlude

The girl was extremely pissed off. Not only did she lose those two, but now she had no idea where the hell she was. How big is this damn library, anyway? she thought in exasperation. She had passed at least thirteen – scratch that, fourteen – rows of shelving without any sign of a wall, let alone those two weirdoes.

She had been in her school’s library when she had overheard them...

---

"It's just that...humans don't tend to just throw themselves at each other. We try very hard to form meaningful, close bonds with others before…doing what you've been asking for. And frankly, the fact that people like Lee, Alfonz, and me are used to seeing you in a different light than that makes it all much harder to adjust. And a main issue with that is your species – humans have a sort of cultural taboo against…*relations*…with other species.

She had stuck her head out – just to check – when she saw them. The guy looked good normal enough, but there was something off about the girl he was with. It didn’t take her long to realize the girl wasn’t simply drunk: it looked like she didn’t know how to use her own legs.

Just like I was when I first came here, she mused. She wondered how they had gotten there when she noticed it. A door that she had never seen before – which she knew was impossible due to the fact that she had a blueprint of the entire campus mapped out in her head.

It also helped that said door was sticking out of a support beam.

As she watched them go, she knew she had to find out where they came from, so she waited until they were halfway through the door. She stuck her foot between the frame, stopping it before it could close, and stepped through after waiting a few seconds.

It took her all of two seconds so discover the girl’s identity as she reverted to her natural form.

Twilight Sparkle. It’s like Christmas morning.

Her plan had been to follow her through and take back what was rightfully hers, but as she kept walking, she noticed something – unlike Twilight, she hadn’t changed.

---

Voices snapped her from this line of thought as she approached a set of shelves. Slowing her pace, she came up on the other side as quietly as she could manage. Gingerly removing several books, she made a hole large enough for her to peek through.

What the– ?

Standing on the other side of the shelf was the strangest group she had ever seen. Three humans, five pegasi, Twilight Sparkle…

She resisted the urge to slap herself as she took in the last two. One looked like a boombox on legs, and the other looked human but had no face. The latter was carrying one of the pegasi on its back in some kind of – bundle of wood? she thought dazedly. No, those branches are moving – I think it’s safe to say that’s a part of him.

Listening for several moments gave her valuable information. The guy she saw earlier was named Setton, and according to the others, the other two were named Silias and Lee. The faceless *thing* was known only as The Beast, which to her seemed appropriate.

She noticed that two of the pegasi looked exactly alike, but the almost conveniently timed stories they were telling explained this for her. She cringed when she heard the graphic details of where they came from, but looked at – Setton, was it? – with interest.

Apparently there was more to him than met the eye candy.

---

Silias looked over at Factory Dash, who looked like she was finally coming to. “Uh, what do we do with –”

The Beast whirled one of his branches around at an impressive speed, holding up a small writing utensil. “MEMETIC PENCIL!” he said in a calm, controlled voice as he brought the item to bear with the pegasi’s waking eyes. Immediately they widened, and Factory Dash bolted upright. Interestingly, she kept her eyes glued to the pencil, like a dog might to the beam of a laser pointer.

No one moved for several moments, and during this time she didn’t blink once.

The Beast broke the silence. “Lee? When will it stop working?”

Lee gave the mare an evaluating gaze. “The memetic pencil? I’d say another thirty seconds until it’s done its work.”

Rainbow Dash stared in disbelief. “A ‘memetic pencil’? Seriously?”

---

The girl behind the bookshelf raised her eyebrow, mainly due to the fact that the idea of a ‘memetic pencil’ sounded utterly ridiculous.

---

Lee glanced at the pegasus. “I realize that the idea of a ‘memetic pencil’ sounds utterly ridiculous, but it was the best I could come up at the time.” He rubbed his head wearily, trying to shake energy back into himself. “To be fully honest, I’m not sure what it’ll do – it’s supposed to have a calming effect on the mind, and basically make weak minds susceptible to instruction.” His brow furrowed as he remembered the circumstances of its conception. “However, I’m not sure how well it’ll work due to the fact that I had been drinking when I came up with it,” he admitted.

Rainbow Dash finally put two and two together. “Hey, who’re you calling ‘weak-minded’?”

“Factory Dash, of course,” he deadpanned. “I didn’t mean to offend you, but if the fact that you and her are practically carbon-copies implies that you’re weak minded, then I’m sorry. However, you’re not acting like her in the slightest, so that gives you no right to –” Silias poked his shoulder to get his attention. Lee looked up to see Rainbow Dash was also staring intently at the memetic pencil. “Oh for God’s sake, you didn’t have to prove it.” Lee grumbled.

Silias grinned widely. “May I try something?” There was something eager in his tone, but Lee decided to hear him out on this one.

He went up to the mare and took the pencil carefully from The Beast’s grip. Holding it in front of Factory Dash, taking care to block Rainbow Dash’s view as he did so, with a wave of his hand he said, “These are not the foals you’re looking for.” Setton’s jaw dropped when she echoed “They’re not the foals I’m looking for” in an emotionless monotone. Silias stared intently at Factory Dash. “Go home and rethink your life.”

Factory Dash’s eyes snapped back into focus. “You know what? I think I’ll go home and…rethink my life.” Having said this, she turned and entered the Door she came from.

Silence.

Silias took this opportunity to raise his fist sideways, which Scootaloo bumped her hoof against. “Lee, this is basically a Jedi Mind Trick in a pencil. Can I keep this?!”

The Beast coughed loudly, attracting their attention. "With that taken care of, we should be moving onto the next Door. No sense in wasting time.”

---

As they left the area, the girl processed all of what she had just witnessed. Most people in her position would stare blankly for a moment before a deadpanning “What the fuck was that?”

However, Sunset Shimmer was not most people.

And she saw the makings of a plan.

Author's Note:

For those of you who have been here since the beginning, thank you so much for your support. I'd also like to mention that several edits have been made to previous chapters, so feel free to check again.

The next *full-length* chapter should be up by the week's end, so hang in there!