Applejack and Fluttershy find themselves in a nuclear shelter with two other ponies that they don't know after the events of a nuclear bomb. What will happen to them? Will their group survive?
I really like how its going, but you need to work on the pacing. The development is great with Mist Shaker (probably because of self insert) but the way Mountain and AJ just got there, went in, got out, it just didn't flow right. Also this is probably just my inner writer speaking out but... WHY ARE THEY KISSING NOW!!! LET THE PLOT DETERMINE THAT! IT DIDN'T HAVE TO HAPPEN LIKE THAT!!!1!!!!1
3516434 well we didn't really intend for it to happen so soon but desperate times call for desperate measures and besides the two that kissed kinda already had a crush on one another before this even started.
3520357 oh there will be more, I just started my new job and I have to go in tonight for the first night of work so I will only be working on the next chapter with Ascending Anthem on my days off.
3487702 I now present chapter two of The Fall Of Equestria.
I really like how its going, but you need to work on the pacing. The development is great with Mist Shaker (probably because of self insert) but the way Mountain and AJ just got there, went in, got out, it just didn't flow right. Also this is probably just my inner writer speaking out but... WHY ARE THEY KISSING NOW!!! LET THE PLOT DETERMINE THAT! IT DIDN'T HAVE TO HAPPEN LIKE THAT!!!1!!!!1
3516434 well we didn't really intend for it to happen so soon but desperate times call for desperate measures and besides the two that kissed kinda already had a crush on one another before this even started.
is there more?
3520357 oh there will be more, I just started my new job and I have to go in tonight for the first night of work so I will only be working on the next chapter with Ascending Anthem on my days off.