In Aeternum

by Traintrack to Nowhere

To Question

Chapter 4: To Question

If Twilight could pace furiously, she would. But at the moment her fatigue and various strains made that infeasible, so she was forced to vent steam through her ears and stare at the conundrum in front of her instead. And it was a conundrum. The being before her, simply put, made absolutely no sense. No living creature could function they way it was... and no dead creature could, either. It was a scientific impossibility!

The silence stretched on between them, long enough for Twilight to calm down slightly and begin to wonder if antagonizing the being that had been nothing but helpful – and, perhaps more relevantly, was not as incapacitated as she thought – was really a good idea. But it had shown no sign of reaction, averse or otherwise, and Twilight was beginning to wonder if it was really still 'awake' or if it had lapsed out of consciousness again. Then it responded.

“I am Sigma Series Six. I am a highly adaptable regenerative synthetic. To elaborate: I am an imitation of a human being created through the use of advanced sciences novel even...” There was a brief, almost undetectable, pause as the explanation skipped a thought, but the words continued to flow fast enough for Twilight to miss it. “I do not function as a living organism, because by definition, I am neither alive nor an organism. I am a simulacrum. An imitation. A living relic. Exact details are available but I believe them to be beyond your understanding. I would prefer to be referred to as Eternity.”

Twilight blinked. Then she blinked again. “What?”

The being – 'Eternity' – sighed. Or let out a sound similar to sighing, because now that she was paying attention, Twilight could tell no air was actually released. “Imagine a pile of dust. Breathe life into it and shape it in the form of yourself. You then have a close, if crude, approximation of my nature. I am an automaton. A doll. A puppet without strings. I was made, not born. The list of definitions extends on... but I am neither willing, nor comfortable, continuing.”

The world was silent then, save for the sound of Twilight's own breathing. What kind of magic... could simulate life? To this degree? But the – Eternity – being attributed its existence to science. Not magic. But that was impossible! To create anything so advanced, so... real. Magic could be the only explanation! Modern science, taking away anything related to magic, couldn't even conceive of the notion being presented here. It had to work using some kind of magic but... what if it didn't? What... what could be learned, from something so advanced? Twilight's mind reeled at the implications. Dare she say – this went beyond first contact with a new race. This being could yield so many advancements... if it wasn't hostile... and – a loud cry echoed through the air as something in the distance was injured (or worse) – if she survived to tell of it.

A shift of footing on dusty stone signaled that Twilight was not alone in these thoughts as her unusual protector glanced concernedly toward the top of the ravine, “This place is not safe. You have alluded to the existence of a hospital and, presumably, safety. It would be best to leave here for there. You still require medical attention.”

If the cry didn't bring Twilight back to reality, that statement did. Her confusion, nervousness, and excitement regarding the speaker aside, Eternity had a point. The Everfree was hardly the best place to discuss anything, and she was hurt (but mostly tired.) But, was leading this being to Ponyville really the best idea? It hadn't acted hostile – quite the contrary – but it was just so... unnatural. Seeing it walk about with such a grievous looking injury on its back was disconcerting, regardless of whether or not it was truly harmed by its presence. But considering her own situation... unless her friends delved deep into the Everfree and risked getting themselves lost – and they would, in time, she was sure – there was no other way out of this situation... yet leaving the Everfree presented its own problem. Namely...

“About that...” Twilight spoke, somewhat sheepishly, “I'm kind of lost.”

Eternity's head tilted to the side quizzically before a prompt response was given. “How lost?”

“Not far. I haven't been wandering for that long... At least, I think I haven't. It's still light out... I think. It's hard to tell down here.”

The strange being glanced upward. Then it jumped. One moment, it stood before her examining the walls of the ravine... the next, it was latched onto the stone wall like some kind of bizarre spider, hands grasping something Twilight couldn't quite make out in the gloom. It climbed further up, breaking through the covering of vines, and Twilight lost sight of it completely.

.X.

When was the last time I enhanced myself beyond my standard parameters? A long time... Not long enough. Enhancing... I hated it. But time was necessary, and I did not trust the strength of these walls... Why did I jump? How long had it been since I jumped for any reason? Even when I fell into the chasms while wandering, so long ago, I refrained from enhancing. So why now? Why, last time?

Something howled in the distance, drawing myself away from my thoughts as I breached the flora covered-precipice, reminding me of the urgency of the situation. Urgency. That was why. I had something to protect. Something – someone – other than myself was relying on me. I could not let them down. This had to be done as quickly as possible... when was the last time I felt such a feeling? Such a drive? As if in answer, the voices I could never hear again, I heard once more.

“It'll be alr-” A crack – a gunshot. Calm assurance turning to cold fury. A scream. Blood. An indifferent voice. A familiar voice. “You... have ceased to be-”

I ended the thought. My past was meant to stay in the past, even if my purpose was to remember it... I had a present, now. I had a duty to it. This distraction was concerning. Something must be wrong... I would have to run maintenance. Later. For now... I spotted a sizable tree and, with another leap, was climbing up its branches. My head broke the canopy quickly, to my mild surprise. It wasn't thick, just... dense.

The unicorn was correct. The sun had passed its zenith, but the night was still two to three hours away. Probably. Probably? I had watched the sun drift horizon to horizon countless times, there could be no room for error. My memory was perfect... wasn't it? What if it the sun's cycle was different now? How much time had passed? What if little time had passed at all? What if my memory wasn't perf – Tangential distractions. I buried my thoughts and set about my current priority.

I could run self-diagnostics later, and find the source of these distractions then. For now, I had a wounded innocent to escort to safety. Not human. But innocent all the same. More importantly... alive. And real.

I reached the lowest branch of the tree and dropped to the ground, descending once more to the... unicorn... waiting below...what if it wasn't alive? Wasn't real?

Wide, violet eyes came into view in the gloom.

That would have to be proof enough.

Author's Note:

I do not desire this story's premature end. Therefor... We have this little 1.2k "gem" my tired mind has thrown together.

Characterization! Botched or not, I don't know. Probably so.

They should be getting out of the forest next chapter, I think.

Please feel free to comment, suggest, and speculate.

Comments

[Radon18]

Huzzah a new chapter!

Eternity did seem a little broken but I'm going to assume that was deliberate. The writing style helped the broken feeling as well, I will also assume that was deliberate.

So far the only thing I could hope for is longer chapters but I suppose if you want the update pace to be slow (but who in their right mind would want that?) it's alright.

[Traintrack to Nowhere]

3433050

Well... honestly...

Chapter length is always inconsistent when I'm writing. Usually it averages out. For this story, that average seems to be about 1.3 k. I prefer to get at least 2000 but if it's not going to happen relatively naturally, I won't force it. My preferred chapter length is 6k, but then we'd have maybe 2 chapters instead of 4 and... it helps me have a feeling of progress to be able to keep them coming in relatively consistent lengths.

If I end up writing something I get absorbed in, expect the length to jump. But right now the story is kind of... dry. I expect it to remain that way, because I don't really have much experience with this sort of story. Or this setting, for that matter.

As for Eternity being 'broken' well, yes. I'm trying to convey the sense that she's... 'broken.' Or, more accurately, disturbed. She did spend a couple thousand years completely alone, craving company. I want to make sure that there's a noticeable effect present. But I'm not sure if it's quite the one I'm intending... Oh well. Words march on.

Thank you for your comment and time.

[Radon18]

3433070

Well it worked fairly well I think, to me at least she really felt like a glitchy machine. She has a very interesting psyche it's somewhere in between the way a human thinks and the commands, directives, and "thought patterns" of a machine.

When I write the chapter length varies wildly. I have chapters anywhere from 1500 words to 10k and beyond.

Beginnings are one of my favorite parts of an HiE they usually have so much interesting conflict that some stories don't manage to grasp again until the very end, or not at all.

When I write it tends to be quick in the beginning, slows down in the middle, and then speeds back up for the end.

[Traintrack to Nowhere]

3433089

Well, she is the glitchiest gynoid in existence... (of course, she's the only one in existence...)

Her thought patterns are why I like writing her so much. Eternity's always been one of my favorite characters, towing the line between science and fantasy -- possible and impossible. Does she truly have a soul? Or is it merely an extremely intricately evolved program? Writing her is always a fight to answer that question. I want her to have a soul, but I also want there to be room to doubt. It's nice to see that conflict being recognized.

[Shadow-Dancer]

3433108 Well done, i'm hoping to eventually reach a point where my own story is not rimed with cliche's, but anyway enough about my poor excuse for a story I have to say this was well done and I have not seen any story like this. It is good writers like you that show me what I could become with time and practice.

[Traintrack to Nowhere]

3437389

I don't consider myself a good writer of anything, let alone stories - whatever others tend to say - but it is the reader's prerogative to judge. Thank you for the compliment, and don't put yourself down so much. Keep at it, don't be afraid to shake things up, make an effort not to make the same mistake twice, and you'll improve.

And whatever you do, don't try to hold yourself up to a standard you can't match. At least, not immediately. Just write, and let come what may.

[Shadow-Dancer]

3437521 I know and I won't hold myself to a standard I cant reach, that would set myself up for disappointment(and then I would kinda deserve ) and i just plan when necessary and kinda wing it while checking for consistency, the rest of the time until I think of another good fitting plot idea. It has worked so far and I just like the sense of freedom to wonder with a story to see what shit the character gets themselves in.

One that I am just starting will have a lot more of this as he will have to move around during a multi-faction war the biggest being the NLR and SE the others fighting for survival or taking advantage of the chaos and just arm everyone. With this human now looking for a way back home and at the same time to survive in a war on a world where humans don't exist and his abilities make him someone that would be useful for all sides, changelings to give love, NLR and SE to fight, some nations to sell him as a weapon to the highest bidder and some kill because he is different and an unknown variable.

I want to paint every faction in a grey light No one is good nor evil they just view this human a means to accelerate their own plan, also I want to write how war and having to kill to survive can affect a person and how being weary of others can do so even more.

Also besides, is the whole point of fantasy to wonder hills and mountains to explore the unknown to delve deep into a realm of blades and magic?

[Traintrack to Nowhere]

3437727

Well yes, no one is good or evil, but by the same token not everyone is niether good nor evil and, furthermore, not everyone has an agenda. When you're trying to be neutral, that seems awfully cynical and hobbe-like in thinking. Personally, I think if you were to try and present moral ambiguity you would need to have clear motivations for each faction, and all of them would have to have an understandable motive. All of them would have to be at least somewhat sympathetic. The end result is something like a mob of well-intentioned extremists.of varying degrees of 'extreme.'

On other notes: I have difficulty seeing a human being treated specifically as a weapon. They'd have to be pretty-well equipped to warrant it and at that point one wonders why his weapons aren't what's treated as... well, weapons. Any sort of manipulator with a plan doesn't remove a new variable just because it's unknown. It just doesn't work like that. They remove them because the unknown is a potential threat, not because it's unknown.

More relevant to your comment, though... The whole soldier in Equestria thing seems to be a blaring cliche in and of itself on site from what I've gathered, though I could be wrong. The idea itself seems interesting. I'd have to see it implemented to call it unique.

The point of fantasy, in my opinion, is less to explore the wonders of a fictional world and more to escape the tedium of the world we know. That's not to say exploring the unknown isn't a motivation, but in most cases, I think, it's an escape outlet.

Please take everything said above with a grain of salt, I'm merely rambling about my observations. If you'd like to discuss this in-depth with me please send a message.