The Titans' Orb

by Mister Horncastle

Chapter Four: Early Complications

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Before I went into the living room to join the girls, I made a quick trip to the kitchen and grabbed a dish cloth. Not wanting the others to freak out over my split lip, I made an effort to make the damage seem as insignificant as possible. Turning on the cold tap, I wetted the cloth and then gently pressed it against my mouth to cool it down and reduce the inflammation.

{Oh Twilight…} I thought to myself, exhaling with bitterness, {What's making you like this? What on earth were you told?}

Dabbing at my lip to clear the blood, I reflected on all the information currently available to me, desperately trying to suss out what had driven Twilight to such a drastic level of hostility and paranoia. It was all well and good that she knew about humanity’s darker merits, but this went deeper than that, I could feel it. Twilight was a pony who valued logic, and I had presented her with plenty of that, and yet she couldn’t see me as anything other than a monster, despite the fact she was the one who had attacked me!

With only the cartoon to go on, I had no idea what the real Princess Celestia was like, but I was certain that this extreme level of antagonism wasn’t her intention. Twilight had taken whatever she had said and amplified it on her own accord, that much I could guess. That was all I had, guesswork, and until Twilight gave me something more substantial than a split lip, I would be stuck with guesswork.

Grumpily casting the cloth away once the bleeding had stopped, I muttered that it would have to do and took myself to the living room. I was greeted immediately by Rainbow Dash, donning a merry smile.

“Hey dude, I was just about to come looking for you, Rarity’s come up with a plan!”

“Fantastic!” I replied cheerfully, “Let’s hear it?”

However, before Rarity could elaborate, Applejack spotted my swollen lip and narrowed her eyes.

“Uh, Sugarcube… what in tarnation happened there?”

She pointed at my face, and at that, everyone began peering at me more attentively and spotted the dark tear in my lip, along with the reddish purple mark just beneath it. With a gasp, Rarity promptly got up and zipped over to me, practically knocking Applejack out of the way in order to reach me.

“Darling, that looks painful! What ever happened to you?”

With a frown, Rainbow Dash raised her lips into a snarl and angrily wiggled her jaw.

“Oh, I know what happened alright…”

Opening her mouth to continue, I knew that she was going to accuse Twilight of attacking me, and although she would have been right, I didn’t want to bring about any further hostility, and so I chose to lie.

“It’s nothing, really! Just a result of my own idiocy.” I chuckled awkwardly, “I tripped over on the way back from seeing Twilight, that’s all.”

With her gritted teeth on partial display, Rainbow Dash looked at me bitterly and shook her head, knowing that I wasn’t telling the truth. She was just about to call me out on it when Twilight walked in, and as she did so, Rarity looked at her with wide eyes.

“Did you see what happened?” she demanded.

And then, seizing my face with both of her hooves, Rarity forcibly turned my head for Twilight to see.

“Just look at it, Twilight, look at it! The poor thing…”

“I have a name.” I said blankly with my cheeks still squished together.

The lilac unicorn did as she was bid and peered at her own handiwork. She pursed her lips, unsure of what to say. Looking around cautiously, she expected that I had told them what had occurred, and was waiting for the public outcry. But to her curiosity, no such thing came, and with a chuckle, I pushed Rarity’s doting hooves away and insisted that I was fine.

“As I said,” I spoke emphatically, locking eyes with Twilight, “I just tripped.”

Turning to face the others, I went on to say that I had become absent-minded, and had simply tripped over my own feet, with my mouth regrettably smacking into one of the flowerpots on the patio.

“Ooh, that sounds like it hurt.” Rarity winced, shaking her head.

“Eh, it’s fine.” I assured her, “I swear I’m not normally this clumsy.”

Sighing, I bolstered the lie by telling them that I was still trying to process that this was all real, and that I just got a little scatterbrained on the way back to the house, that’s all.

“Yeah, I suppose that makes sense.” Applejack hummed with understanding, “If creatures from another world showed up on my farm, telling me I was needed for some big quest of theirs, I’d be more darn befuddled than an earthworm in a bowl of noodles!”

As Applejack delivered her first countryism of the adventure, I was hard-pressed to stifle a bewildered laugh. Meanwhile, Twilight looked at me and raised an eyebrow, obviously not expecting for me to cover up her little outburst. I gave her a wink, and for the first time, she responded to me with an inkling of kindness, subtly nodding her head to me in thanks. It wasn’t much, but it was definitely a start. With time, perhaps I really could earn her trust…

“That does look… pretty painful.” the unicorn admitted.

The expression on her face was layered, and I noticed a glint in her eye that echoed a familiar scene, just earlier today; it was the exact same look I had seen on Jan’s face, after she had shoved me to the floor this morning. It was a faintly shimmering sense of regret, and in that moment I knew that Twilight regretted hitting me. But alas, just like with my mother the compassion was limited, and only lasted for a short time.

“Well, I suppose you should have watched where you were going.” she crooned, “As our new guide, I would expect you to at least have the capability to guide yourself.”

{You little shit…}

Almost saying that aloud, I only just kept my cool; the absolute bloody cheek… The others were once again shocked by the callousness, but kept their opinions to themselves, with poor Rainbow Dash looking as though she were about to explode. At first, I didn’t understand the game Twilight was trying to play, but then the unicorn’s eyes betrayed her, as they momentarily drifted to her friends.

{So that’s your play…} I thought.

She was trying to draw a reaction from me, to provoke me into displaying the same peremptory stance from earlier. She wanted her friends to be mistrustful of me, as she was. Well, it wasn’t going to work, and I responded to her with a goofy smile, agreeing with her in full.

“You’re absolutely right, shan’t happen again.”

My play won over hers. She knew that she was in the wrong, and without a shred of retaliation from me, there was no way for her to justify it. Eyeing me up and down for a moment, the unicorn showed further remorse, paired with a hint of frustration. She exhaled heavily from her nose and went to sit down beside Pinkie and Applejack, both of whom shuffled uncomfortably away from her. Not that I wanted to ‘win’ or anything, but it felt nice that her own friends weren’t exactly on her side.

Moving on, I asked what plan Rarity had come up with, to which she sat down and cleared her throat, flicking aside her perfectly curled mane, to which I couldn’t help but smirk; even on another planet in the wake of a dangerous mission, she still maintained her sense of beauty and glamour.

“Well you see, darling,” she began, “when the Titans’ Orb was removed from our world, a great deal of its essence was left behind, a magical residue if you will, one with a very unique signature.”

“Okay, I’m following so far.” I murmured.

Continuing, Rarity explained that Twilight had imbibed this essence at Princess Celestia’s instruction, thus binding its arcane signature to her body and allowing her to resonate with it. What this meant was that Twilight could sense when pieces of the Orb were close by.

“This was essentially our only method of finding the pieces.” Rarity went on, “But even then, we would need to be close to them just for it to work. Think of it as trying to find a needle in a haystack, using a very strong magnet. You would think it was an easy task, but first, we still need to find the haystack.”

“Ahh…” I hummed, “So, what’s your solution?”

“My solution,” the pearly unicorn replied, “is for Twilight to use my gem finding spell.”

“What if it locks onto other gemstones in the world?”

“Ah-bub-bub, I wasn’t finished!” she sang, tilting her head, “If Twilight were to alter the spell slightly, and pair it with the signature from the Orb’s essence, it ought to lock onto the fragments, and only the fragments.”

My eyebrows shot up, that was actually a really good idea. Everyone else seemed to think so too, with Pinkie clapping her hooves together and cheering, and Applejack and Fluttershy both praising the mare’s idea. Rarity raised her chin proudly, and even Twilight lightened up some, admitting the plan was superb.

With that, there was only one final matter to tend to.

“Firstly, that idea is absolutely sound, well done Rare. However, we need to handle this business of faking my death, and I’ll be honest, I haven’t a clue of how to go about it. Any suggestions?”

At first, I thought this part would be much harder to plan out, but Pinkie Pie had other ideas.

“Ooh, ooh! That’s easy-peasy, one-two-threesy! All you need is for Twilight to use her cloning spell, and then you can just make the clone look all dead-like!”

Blinking rapidly, I was gobsmacked.

“Uh… Pinkie, you’re a genius!” I exclaimed with wide eyes.

“No I’m not, I’m a pony!”

We all burst into laughter, with not even Twilight being able to withhold an amused splutter. Turning to the unicorn, I took the chance to open a dialogue with her while she was in a better mood.

“So you actually have a cloning spell then? You can actually… copy people?”

“Not exactly.” she replied, thankfully remaining civil, “Cloning spells vary in complexity, but none of them will ever make a fully functional duplicate. Flesh can be replicated, but your soul? No, there’s no magic strong enough to do something like that, not that I know of anyway. If I cloned you, it would be more like an echo of you, a magical construct made to resemble you. Clones also don’t last forever, if its creator doesn’t destroy it manually to regain mana, a clone will naturally break down after a week or two.”

“Huh, well either way that’s incredible!” I told her, “That would definitely do the trick!”

Amazingly, in spite of things, Twilight asked if I would like a demonstration of the spell, to which I very eagerly agreed to. Nodding, the unicorn instructed me to stand still and got to her hooves again. The girls gave us some space, and Twilight’s horn began to glow brightly. I then felt a tingling sensation throughout my body, followed by a thin stream of light emerging from my chest. It wasn’t painful in the slightest, though it did feel incredibly warm. The light coalesced in front of me, forming a shimmering sphere. At first it was no bigger than an apple, but as the light kept pouring out of me, the sphere began to grow. It was the most incredible thing I had ever seen, this was some seriously potent magic, all happening right here before my eyes.

Eventually, the flow of light ceased, and the sphere began to stretch out, twisting and turning as it began to take the form of a human being. Me, it was taking the form of me! And then, in the space of a second, the glowing form’s light dissipated, leaving behind a perfectly convincing replica of myself. The others watched on, observing this magicless creature experience such a magical phenomenon.

“Whoa…” I breathed, utterly mesmerised.

“Whoa indeed.” the clone spoke.

I jumped back a few feet and nearly shat a brick, caught completely off-guard.

“It… it can talk!?” I blurted out, pointing at the clone with awe.

“I don’t know, can it?” he asked in reply, shrugging at me with a smirk.

Scoffing with amusement, I circled him, starstruck beyond description. Even as a living falsehood, it seemed that my clone could think for himself and even form his own sentences. Seeing my own self from another’s perspective was beyond surreal; and damn, was my arse really that good? I gave my doppelgänger’s firm rear a curious touch, to which he turned around and looked at me with an upturned eyebrow.

“Hey now big boy, take me on a date first, yeah?”

Every single one of us, clone included, burst into hysterics at the comment. The laughs went on for quite a while, until Twilight finally brought it to a close, rolling her eyes.

“Alright, that’s enough now, it was only a demonstration.”

Her horn once again shone brightly, and the clone in turn started to glow. Small pieces of his body then began to break away into dancing little wisps of light, which faded away into nothingness. In his very last moments of existence, he began to sing solemnly, accepting his end.

“Hello darkness, my old friend… I’ve come to talk with you again…”

His singing then came to a halt, as his entire being fell apart and vanished altogether.

“Well, that was depressing.” I murmured, huffing with amusement.

Turning to Twilight, I thanked her for the demonstration, and said that it had most certainly been the craziest experience of my life to date. Wordlessly responding with a huff through her nose, she accepted my thanks and then returned to her moody non-verbal state.

“Right, so in all seriousness, how are we going to do this?” I asked openly.

The girls looked at each other, not sure of what to say. Finally, Rainbow Dash came up with an idea.

“We could like, I don’t know, pretend there was a break in?”

“Ooh, I like that.” I said, pointing at her with a finger, “Go on?”

“Well,” she explained, “we could make it look like someone broke into your house to steal some stuff, or something. Then it would look as if you tried to fight them, and they uh, killed you, I guess.”

Clapping my hands together, I told her the idea was perfect. Twilight then tried to shoot down the idea.

“And how are you suggesting we simulate a break in, huh?”

“Simple.” I retorted with a toothy grin, “We can break in ourselves! I can kick the front door in, and we just smash a few things here and there, make it look like someone really went to town on the place.”

It made sense, but some of the girls weren’t all too convinced just yet. They looked at each other with uncertain expressions, not sure what to make of the idea.

“Sugarcube, are you sure you want to do that?” Applejack asked me, furrowing her brow, “This is your home, ain’t it? Do you really want to… smash it up?”

With a half-hearted laugh, I told AJ that this place was hardly my home, especially now. After all that Jan had put me through, I decided that it was time for some payback. Expressing just how much hurt had occurred in this house, I told them that it was about time I had some justice, and I would have it by way of trashing this place, and leaving that vile woman to deal with the aftermath. Plus, just as the Hide and Seek had helped us to bond, I suggested that we may all get a fair bit of enjoyment out of duffing up the place together.

“You’ve all spent two weeks confined to that little camp, treading on each other’s hooves and not being able to do much.” I pointed out, “Come on, don’t tell me it doesn’t sound like a good way to let off some steam, huh?”

Unsurprisingly, Rainbow Dash sided with my point immediately, asking when we could get started. That’s when a thought crossed my mind; if I was leaving this place to travel the world, then I needed supplies. Relaying this to the girls, they were in full agreement, and so the violence would have to wait. Rushing up to my room, I retrieved my dad’s big camping rucksack, which I had claimed as my own since he left. It had plenty of room, I just needed to decide what to pack it with.

Returning downstairs, I found that Chilli and Archer had come into the lounge, finally brave enough to say hello to the bizarre-looking visitors in their home. Seeing them brought another thought to my mind; what about them? I couldn’t leave them here alone, not with a battered up house and a dead clone of myself! Oliver wouldn’t be home for days yet, and with Mum coming home tomorrow, they would be left overnight in an unsafe situation. On top of that, Janice was the furthest thing from a responsible owner, even after getting home, there was no way I could trust her with them. I wanted the best for them, but how on earth could I achieve that when I was about to duff up the house and stage my own murder? With my mind racing, the stress of all these additional steps began to overwhelm me. I just wanted to get going, but it wasn’t so simple.

Then an idea hit me. I had a friend close by, my only friend within walking distance, a fellow brony by the name of Bruce Harding. He was one of my best mates, and there was no doubt in my mind that he would look after the dogs if I asked him to. A lover of animals and a deeply loyal friend, Bruce was one of the few people I might be able to trust with the knowledge of what was going on. Like me, he took oaths very seriously, and I knew that I could rely on him if he swore to secrecy. With plenty of land, he could quite easily care for the dogs, without even needing to walk them in public, meaning they wouldn’t ever be seen. After all, as soon as I was publicly dead, there would be a manhunt for my killer, with the dogs likely being mentioned if they went missing. He lived only a couple of miles away, a forty-minute walk at most.

“Hey, look…” I began, entering the living room again.

With a shaky start, I explained to the girls what I was thinking, and what I was planning to do with the dogs. The words had barely left my lips, and Twilight kicked off.

“Absolutely not.” she spat, “We’ve already wasted enough time today, I’m not jeopardising this mission any further. Not for you, and not for your mutts. You can tie them up somewhere and-”

“I’m sorry, I think I heard you wrong.” I interrupted.

I took a step towards her, doing everything in my power not to snap. With a gulp, Twilight realised that I had been angered by the comment, and that she may just get that retaliation after all.

“It almost sounded like you just called my beloved dogs, of whom I love very dearly, one of whom you attacked yesterday, mutts. Did I hear that right?”

She started to cower slightly, and I saw the same fright in her from earlier, the looming dread that I was going to hurt her. Of course, I would never, and I knew this was hardly helping her think otherwise, but if she was going to insult my dogs and disregard their safety, then she needed to know that it wouldn’t go without consequence.

“You listen.” I ordered, “I’m about to give up my entire life for you. There’s no going back for me after this, and the one thing I want to do is make sure my pets are cared for after I’m gone. Now, I know this is throwing a spanner in the works, and I’m sorry for that, but I need to do this, okay? If I’m going to help you, then I need to leave here with a clear conscience, and I can’t do that without getting my dogs somewhere safe first.”

From behind me, the other girls supported my cause, with Fluttershy outright telling Twilight that we weren’t leaving until Chilli and Archer were safe. I was taken aback by her boldness, but then again, with two animals’ welfare on the line, I should have expected it.

“Ugh, fine.” Twilight conceded, “But after this, no more distractions. Once you get back, we’re staging the break in, killing your clone, and getting out of here for good, are we clear?”

“Crystal clear.” I told her, “Thank you.”

Huffing, she went to read more of my books, while I rushed to my room to turn on my laptop. Bruce was always active on Skype, so I went to contact him as quickly as possible. Curious as to how I was going to contact another human, the other girls followed me into my room and watched as I logged into the device. Almost immediately I regretted it, as my desktop wallpaper came into view, depicting none other than Derpy Hooves, sticking her head through a generic Windows background.

“Dude…” said Rainbow Dash, “Is that Derpy!?”

Gulping, I turned around to look at her, expecting her to be utterly horrified, and yet, Rainbow’s face was plastered with an excited grin. Glancing past her at the others, I found they were smiling too, gazing at the cartoon depiction of their fellow pony.

“Erm… yeah… that’s Derpy alright!” I chuckled awkwardly, “Although I’m not going to lie, I thought you would all be a little unsettled at seeing her on here. I’m not exactly sure how much you actually know about the cartoon.”

Sensing my anxiety, Rarity was quick to clear the air on that front, clarifying what they knew.

“Oh don’t fret dear, we know just enough not to be too disturbed. During our mission briefing, the Princess told us all about how we co-exist in your world, in the form of an animated story for children. She said there are older fellows too such as yourself who watch it, called bronies, and that it broadcasts to the public via your, um, what is it called? A talvision?”

“Close, it’s television.” I corrected, “Or just TV for short.”

Rarity gave an interested ‘hmm’ in acknowledgement, and I decided to carry on with my query.

“But I don’t get it, I would have thought that you’d all be freaked out by knowing something like that. I know for a fact I would be, so what gives?”

“Oh trust me darling, we were to start with, terribly so in fact. Poor Fluttershy even had a panic attack over it, bless her! But as the Princess explained everything in thorough, we soon came to terms with the ordeal. She was even able to show us some of the cartoon directly, and though it was awfully strange at first, I must admit, it was quite entertaining to see myself as an animated character. My mannerisms and voice were imitated flawlessly! You humans are very talented with your work.”

Humming with understanding, their reactions made a lot more sense now. It also made using my laptop a lot more straightforward, as I no longer felt the need to hide all the ponified content, such as the icons on my taskbar. With that in mind, I moved my cursor to the task bar and clicked on Skype, and waited patiently for it to open.

“So, who is this friend of yours exactly, and how do you plan on reaching out to him?” asked Rarity.

“Do we get to meet him?” Pinkie followed up.

Putting my mouth to one side, I said that it was probably for the best if we didn’t complicate things further by revealing them to him. The ponies didn’t need to be included in this transaction, it would be far simpler to keep things centred around myself and the dogs. Applejack expressed her agreement verbally, with the others giving accompanying nods of understanding.

“And to answer your question, Rare, his name is Bruce. He used to live next-door, but he moved a little further out to his parents’ house after they died.”

“Oh that’s terrible…” she breathed, “How did they pass?”

“Cancer.” I replied, “Do you have that in Equestria?”

“All too sadly.” the unicorn confirmed, “It’s treatable with magic, but it still very much a killer in our world.”

“Same here.” I told her, “We don’t have magic, but we can treat it through surgery and something called chemotherapy, but you have to catch it early on, and even then, it may come back.”

Lowering her head, the ponies sympathised with my words, I supposed it was a similar story on Equus. Not wanting to dwell too much on the subject, I went on to tell them that Bruce was a devout animal lover, similar to Fluttershy. That brightened things up, with the buttery pegasus raising her head and inhaling sharply with excitement.

“Ooh, really?”

Nodding, I said that since his parents’ passing, he had dedicated his life to caring for animals. He fostered cats and dogs that had been abandoned by their former owners, and was essentially running his own animal shelter. He even had a small local charity going, a business of sorts, where people subscribed to him via monthly payments, allowing him to continue running the shelter, while he in turn would cover the cost of his donors’ vet bills. In a sense, he had started his own local pet insurance company, running symbiotically with his at-home shelter.

“That’s… amazing!” Fluttershy squealed, springing to life, “Oh goodness, I just have to see this for myself! Please let me come with you, I want to see it!”

Leaning back in my chair and inhaling deeply, I said that it was Twilight who would need persuading, not me, to which she immediately fell silent, knowing such a thing was folly. Applejack then asked how I meant to actually contact Bruce, to which I explained that I was about to call him on Skype.

“Uh Sugarcube, what in tarnation is a Skype?”

With a laugh, I told her that it was an application on my laptop that allowed me to communicate with others across the world, either by instant messages, or by video calling.

“What does ‘video’ mean?” asked Pinkie.

“Oh, it’s another term for a moving picture, just like the Kung Fu Panda film.” I clarified.

They all let off a synchronised ‘oohhh…’ to which I chuckled, and finally got to messaging Bruce to see if he was around. With Skype now open, I selected his profile and then clicked on the message bar, and then I typed a casual greeting to say hi.

Hey broski, how are ya?
I need to talk to you about something.

The ponies stared at the screen in confusion. Rainbow Dash then asked if something was supposed to happen, to which I instructed her to be patient. Eventually, after a good thirty to forty seconds, I received a reply.

Heeyy Callum! How’s it going bud? Yeah I’m good, busy as always, but good!
What's up?

Seeing the message, the other ponies were amazed.

“So, that just came from some dude in another part of the world?” Dashie asked in awe.

“Yep-yep!” I confirmed, grinning.

Typing back, I decided not to beat around the bush and told Bruce that I needed to ask him a huge favour.

Ugh, your favours are always costly. What is it now?

Explaining that it was serious, I said that I needed his help, and quite urgently too. Telling me that he was now worried, he asked what I meant, and if I was in some sort of trouble. Knowing that it would be better to speak in person, I asked if I could just call him, to which he promptly said yes. I then explained to the girls how the call would work, and that he would see everything from my webcam, and hear everything via my laptop’s microphone. With that, Applejack gave Pinkie a look.

“That means keep your cake-guzzling trap shut.” she teased.

Giggling, Pinkie nodded, and the girls all moved so that they were out of the camera’s view. They then watched keenly from the side as I clicked on the call button, and after a few seconds of ringing, Bruce appeared on the screen.

“Right, talk to me.” he ordered, folding his arms, “What the bloody hell have you done, Callum?”

Giving a heavy sigh, I didn’t really know where to begin, other than that I needed his help.

“Like I said, I need to ask you a favour, a big one, and it needs to stay between us.”

“Dude, you are really freaking me out. What is going on?”

Inhaling deeply, I explained that I would be going away, and that he needed to look after the dogs for me.

“Wait, seriously? That’s it? Jeez Callum, don’t do that shit to me! I thought something was actually wrong!”

Wincing slightly at the language, I glanced at the girls, worried they might take offence. Thankfully they seemed mostly unbothered, and I looked back at Bruce with a frown.

“No, you don’t understand.” I continued, “I’m going away, and I’m not coming back.”

His cheesy grin was gone instantly and he froze, processing my words.

“Wait, what do you mean?”

“Look, if I were to leave the dogs with you indefinitely, could you take care of them? Yes or no?”

“Well yeah, obviously, I love Chilli and Archer to bits!” he confirmed, “But what do you mean you aren’t coming back?”

Huffing anxiously, I asked if he could drive over here so I could explain in person. Regrettably, he explained that his car was currently being repaired at the local garage, so I would have to come to him. Clenching my jaw with annoyance, I was hoping that he’d be able to just swing by and pick up the pooches and be done with it, but at least it wasn’t too far of a walk.

“Right, then I’m coming over. See you in like an hour.”

Realising how serious I was, he scrambled to his feet.

“Okay, alright… I err, better get the place ready! Uhh, ah! Dog food, baskets, treats…”

He trailed off, and knowing that his mind was now on the dogs, I said goodbye and that I would be over as quickly as possible. Giving me a thumbs up, he told me that he would put the kettle on, and then promptly ended the call. Sighing with relief, I turned to face the girls with a smile; the dogs would be safe, and we could continue as planned.

“We should tell Twilight.” I suggested.

Everyone agreed, and we went down to explain to her that I would be walking the dogs to Bruce’s, leaving them at his house, and then returning here to deal with the clone. Twilight however, had other plans, or at least, she now wanted us to do things in a different order.

“I want us all out of this house as quickly as possible.” she explained, “You’re going to get on with staging the break in, then we’ll deal with your clone, and then you can take your dogs to your friend. We’ll pack up our camp while you’re gone, and then we can all leave.”

Although I didn’t agree, I chose not to contest it. At the end of the day, she had given me permission to take Chilli and Archer to Bruce, and that was a tall order considering the urgency of their mission. Nodding in accord, I picked up my rucksack again and decided to finish packing. Being downstairs, my first port of call was to raid the kitchen. Delving into the larder, I thought about the long-term, and only grabbed things that would last a long time without going bad. Fruit and such would need to be found along the journey; rotten food in my bag was the last thing I needed. Soon enough, the rucksack was appropriately loaded with cereal, pasta, rice, crisps, and with Pinkie in mind, a few bars of chocolate. Additionally, I looted every tin of beans I could find, knowing I would need them for protein; it was a no-brainer that I wouldn’t be eating meat for a while.

With meat on the mind, I thought hard on the issue. Even if I became a vegetarian from this time forward, the ponies would find out one way or another that I was an omnivore. When that happened, the loose bonds of trust that I had formed with the girls could very well go out the window, and that terrified me. But still, there was little to be done about that right now, and I fought hard to let the thoughts blow away, deciding that my only option was to cross that bridge when I came to it.

Ensuring there was still space in the bag, I rushed around the house to grab things that I required aside from food. I gathered my swimming goggles, a towel, my phone charger, my toothbrush and accompanying toothpaste, some extra socks and boxers, and a spare change of clothes. Sneaking into Oliver’s room, I also stole one of his Swiss Army knives, knowing it would surely come in handy. I also grabbed a few rolls of toilet paper from the bathroom; going vegetarian was bad enough, I wasn’t going to use leaves to wipe my arse if I could help it. After that, I returned to the girls and said that I was just about ready, which was when Rarity brought me good tidings.

“While you were packing, I had a little word with Twilight, and she’s agreed to use a Pullie-Portal on you. This way, once you’ve delivered the dogs, you can be zipped straight back here!”

“That’s fantastic news!” I exclaimed, “Quick question, what the heck’s a Pullie-Portal?”

Clearing her throat, Rarity went on to explain that a Pullie-Portal was a two-part spell that essentially worked like a boomerang. The first part of the spell would be cast onto me, making me the boomerang. Then, at a later point in time, Twilight would cast the second part, which would teleport me straight to her location. With my jaw dropping, I couldn’t believe my ears; I was going to teleport!

“Um, Twilight… is it okay if I went with him?” asked Fluttershy, “I really want to see Bruce’s animal sanctuary.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, we’re not supposed to be seen by other humans.” Twilight ordered, “He goes alone.”

“Then how’re you going to know when to pull him back?” Rainbow Dash pointed out.

“Good point.” I said, putting my mouth to one side.

At that, Rarity cleared her throat for a second time and reminded us all that there were two unicorns present. She argued that with a simple cloaking spell, she could accompany me without the risk of being seen, and then magically ping Twilight when we were ready to return. Everyone praised Rarity once again for her clever thinking, and Twilight let out a disgruntled huff.

“Ugh fine, whatever gets us out of here sooner.”

“So… um… could I maybe…”

“Yes Fluttershy, you can go with them!” Twilight barked.

Springing up with delight, Fluttershy thanked the unicorn profusely. Rolling her eyes, Twilight ordered me to get on with beating up the house, which I had no objection to. Ready to rumble, I shot off upstairs with a devious chuckle. I went into my bedroom and retrieved my cricket bat from under the bed, of which I had once frequently used when I was at school. Now armed, and donning the biggest grin my mouth could manifest, I returned to the girls and presented the bat to them.

“What’s that for?” asked Pinkie.

“Do you really need to ask?” Rainbow laughed, knowing exactly what I planned to do with it.

Smirking at the pegasus, I tightened my grip on the handle and closed my eyes, inhaling deeply.

“Oh, I’ve waited a long time for this…”

Releasing the breath, I opened my eyes and bared my teeth.

“Daddy needs to express some rage…”

---

Comments

[PonyJoe1]

Almost immediately I regretted it, as my desktop wallpaper came into view, depicting none other than Derpy Hooves, sticking her head through a generic Windows background.

I love the added detail that you added the ponified icons AND the goddamn date on the taskbar, continuity like that could have been so easily overlooked. I really hope we get more images throughout this story than the original, it really brings it to life. I couldn't help but notice the image of Fluttershy in the ironwood tree is gone from the last chapter.
Can I ask why?

[Mister Horncastle]

11896342
I removed the Fluttershy image because I wasn't happy with how it looked.
As you can tell, (and just mentioned in terms of added detail), I want the visual storytelling to be convincing, and using the SFM model of Fluttershy was much too cartoony.

I need to try and find some more lifelike 3D pony models, then I will create more images and add them to this story in a future update I'm planning.
Yes, this story is getting ANOTHER bloody update after this rewrite comes out.
Not a rewrite mind you, it'll be solely to work on more visuals.

[Twanklight Borkle]

The house is not friend.