Twaylite Sporkul

by Cheesey Microwave

Chapter 2

All of a sudden, Twaylite Sporkul heard a loud cry for help coming all the way from Canterlot Castle. At first Twaylite Sporkul was confused about how Twaylite Sporkul could have possibly heard such a thing all the way in Ponyville, but then Twaylite Sporkul realized that only one pony has capable of creating such an annoying noise: Twaylite Sporkul's teacher, Princess Celestia.

Twaylite Sporkul galloped to Canterlot Castle and burst inside only to see an ugly lizard-turtle-spike thingy knocked out in front of Celestia's throne. Celestia screamed again. "Its spikes are clashing with my style!"

The ugly creature got up and scratched itself. "Ugh... this doesn't look like the Mushroom Kingdom."

"It TALKS?! Its voice is clashing with the background music I put up to make ponies ignore the screams of torture coming from the dungeon downstairs!" Celestia burst into tears.

Twaylite Sporkul kicked the ugly creature in the face. "What the heck are you?"

The ugly creature got up and roared at Twaylite Sporkul, breathing fire as it did so. "I'm Bowser, king of the Koopas!"

Princess Celestia zapped him with her magic. "I'm Queen Chr- I mean, Princess Celestia, ruler of Equestria!"

Bowser burst into tears. "That hurrrt! What did I do to deserve such cruel treatment?!"

Mario and Luigi appeared out of nowhere. "There he-a is! Let's-a get him!" They began kicking and punching Bowser.

Bowser breathed fire on them, disintegrating them. "Why aren't they reincarnating to come and try and kill me again?"

Twaylite Sporkul laughed. "That's ridiculous! Why in all of Equestria would such a thing happen?"

"That's what always happens. They fight me, I kill them, they come back, they defeat me, I run away back to my castle and lie in bed and suck my thumb." Bowser stared at the pile of ashes blankly.

"Well, I can assure you they're not coming back anytime soon." Twaylite Sporkul scooped up the ashes and threw them away.

Bowser began laughing evilly. "Finally! I will be KING! I will take over this pathetic kingdom, and I will be KING!"

Suddenly the Hydra stomped in and ate Bowser, then puked him back up. Except he didn't puke up all of Bowser, just the spiky inedible chucks. The Hydra stomped back to the Everfree Forest, fully satisfied with its meal.

Twaylite Sporkul shook Twaylite Sporkul's head. "Everything is crazy!"

The yellow fox walked in. "Tell me about it. One of the ponies was amazed that I had figured out a teleportation device, even though she was using her horn thingy to teleport! I swear, the locals here are so..."

"Well, they're not going to expect a FOX to know how to teleport! She must've assumed you were using magic somehow. That's the only way an Equestrian can teleport, and the only Equestrians who teleport are unicorns or alicorns!" Twaylite Sporkul stared at the fox like he was crazy. "Who and what are you?"

"I'm Miles Prower, but you can call me Tails."

"I'm Twaylite Sporkul. So, uh, Tails, how did you get here?"

Tails thought for a moment. "Well, I was pulled here from my universe into this one. Unfortunately, since it's not a parallel universe, I stayed in this form instead of adapting to the most common type of life, which would apparently be an Equestrian."

Twaylite nodded. "Okay. So, do you have any idea what your universe would be called? Is it an original or a spinoff universe? We have a spinoff universe where we become these hideous creatures that look like bald monkeys."

"Well, I think it's a spi-" Tails was cut off by Rainbow Dash flying past him, followed by the blue hedgehog running as fast as he could. "Wow, Sonic's actually losing."

Sonic stopped and turned around, a blank look on his face. He zoomed over to Tails. "I never lose. Do you hear me, punk?" His face contorted into pure anger and he grabbed Tails by the neck. "I! NEVER! LOSE!"

"B-but you're losing right now!"

"NO I'M NOT!" Sonic let go of Tails and ran after Rainbow Dash again.

Tails and Twaylite Sporkul watched as Sonic tried to catch up. Discord appeared behind them. "Look! I found a puppy!" He held the red echidna up, who was struggling to get away.

Tails was confused. "Um... that's not a puppy, that's Knuckles. He's an echidna." Tails poked Twaylite Sporkul and whispered, pointing at Discord, "What IS that thing?"

"That's Discord. He's a draconequus and the Lord of Chaos." Twaylite Sporkul sighed and shook Twaylite Sporkul's head.

Knuckles grunted and tried punching Discord. "Let go of me, you mutated freak!"

"Oh, boy, the puppy talks! Can you do tricks? Roll over!" Discord put Knuckles down, who, to Discord's dismay, ran away as fast as possible. Tails ran after Knuckles.

Twaylite watched them run away. "Discord, you know you're not supposed to have a pet until you're housebroken."

Discord crossed his arms angrily. "It's not my fault if I have to use the bathroom and the nearest one is five miles away!"

Twaylite Sporkul facehoofed. "You can teleport! I've seen you do it!"

"But I'm too busy going to the bathroom to teleport."

Twaylite Sporkul got a jetpack and was all like NOTHING TO DO HERE and went somewhere else.

Sonic and Rainbow Dash were racing in the background.

Twaylite Sporkul found out Twaylite Sporkul was in Appleloosa. Braeburn ran up to her. "Welcome to-"

Twaylite Sporkul put Twaylite Sporkul's hoof in his face and pushed him away, then yelled, "WHERE AM I?" Before Braeburn could say anything, Twaylite Sporkul galloped away and ate a pie Twaylite Sporkul had found. The buffalo who was about to eat the pie started crying. Twaylite Sporkul made Twaylite Sporkul's way back to Ponyville.

Apple Jack met up with Twaylite Sporkul. "Everythin' is goin' crazy, Twaylite Sporkul! Ah cahn't imagine why!"

Twaylite thought for a moment. "I know what I must do." Twaylite ran away and got a book of spells. "This was Starswirl the Bearded's Book of Boring Spells Only Eggheads Like Twaylite Sporkul Will Ever Bother To Actually Read. There's a secret unfinished spell. If I cast it, everything will be okay!" Twaylite Sporkul flipped to the back of the book. " 'Peas are delicious, I want them on my flank instead of my normal cutie mark. Let's switch.' What the heck? That doesn't even rhyme!" Twaylite looked at Applejack, who was trying to make a fancy dress. She had Rarity's cutie mark. "Buck."

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