My Little Investigations: Twilight Cases

by Brony_of_Brody

Case 5: Going on a Fakeout

“Good morning, Spike,” Twilight smiled. “You sleep okay?”

“I was until you woke me up,” Spike grumbled. “It was a great dream too; I was rescuing Rarity from the evil clutches of a giant plate of orange jelly. Carnivorous orange jelly.”

“That’s…great?” Twilight raised an eyebrow.

“It’s me rescuing Rarity from evil. Of course it’s great!” Spike argued. Twilight giggled. Spike was smitten with Rarity, and as much as he tried to hide it, he really wasn’t doing a good job of hiding it.

Just then Spike paused, clutched his mouth, and then, in a jet of green flame, burped. From the smoke, a letter drooped out, straight into Twilight’s hooves.

“It’s from Princess Celestia!” Spike exclaimed. He recognised the familiar taste of the Royal Seal in his mouth anywhere.

“WHAT? No way! What does it say?” Twilight carefully opened the envelope (she felt that just tearing it open would show a great deal of disrespect to the princess) and read the contents.

My faithful student,

News of your recent exploits has not gone unnoticed by me. I find it gladdening that you are being so active in helping the lives of others, as well as applying your studies so thoroughly.

It is because of these qualities that I have written to you. Recently, the Royal Guard squad in Ponyville recently received word that on the outskirts of Ponyville, in a small village known as Oatswich, there have been rumours of a counterfeit appliance gem counterfeiting operation currently active. One of the Guards, so I am told, has been complaining of an ‘upstart purple mare stealing his thunder’. After inquiry into the pony he mentioned, the head of investigations for the Ponyville Royal Guard would like you to lend a hoof in the investigation, as a ‘special expert witness’, due to your recent successes.

I would like you to cooperate with the head of investigations and assist him in any way possible. He should be arriving to pick you up at the Golden Oaks Library shortly by carriage.

I apologise if this letter seems quite sudden, but the Guard seem understaffed to investigate this in addition to the other incidents they are currently investigating.

I hope that you will do what you can to assist them. You may of course decline if you feel it is inconvenient, but it would be a tremendous help if you agree.

Good luck, whatever your decision may be.

Your teacher,

Princess Celestia

Twilight felt a sense of panic sweep over her. A big chance to do Princess Celestia proud. A massive project, quite possibly her biggest, next to making friends (which was certainly one of the most difficult). All at 8 in the morning. It seemed too much for Twilight to take in.

She needed coffee.

Alas, it was not to be, and five minutes later, the expected carriage drew up outside the library, and a sharp knock on the door was heard.

Twilight answered the door, shaking, and outside were two stallions in Royal Guard armour, with the two of them drawing a very stark contrast to each other when placed side by side. One was an elderly grey pony who looked as though he had seen his fair share of cases. The other was a smaller black pony with a white mane, who looked more eager than his partner.

“Twilight Sparkle?” the grey stallion asked. His voice sounded quite gruff and stern.

“Um, yes?” Twilight said uncertainly.

“I’m Officer Teeth Kicker. This is my partner, Officer Tough Cheese.”

“Um, nice to meet you, Officer Kicker, Officer Cheese,” Twilight offered.

“I prefer Officer Tough,” said the black pony, rather miffed by his rather unflattering name. “It just sounds…”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Twilight apologised.

“Did you get the letter?” Teeth Kicker asked, cutting to the point. Twilight nodded. “Good. And will you agree to aid us in our investigation?”

“Um, certainly, if you think I can,” Twilight replied a little too quickly. She instantly regretted having said that. She said yes so as not to disappoint Princess Celestia, but was still feeling a rather uneasy sensation in her stomach.

“Oh, I do think,” Teeth Kicker said. “Come on. Our carriage is waiting.”

The three of them made their way inside the carriage parked outside the library. Once they were inside, the white Pegasus pulling the carriage took off.

“Um,” said Twilight, trying to find a conversation topic as they travelled. “The letter said we were heading to Oatswich, didn’t it?”

“Right,” Officer Tough nodded. “We got a tip off from one of the locals that one of the houses was, or is, hiding a counterfeiting gem operation. We’re here to see whether if it’s true.”

“But why bring me along?” asked Twilight. “I don’t see how I could…”

“Word got around in Ponyville about you recently,” said Teeth Kicker. “Especially down at the station. We’ve had one of the officers complaining about you, apparently showing him up. And the Royal Guard in general, but mostly him.”

He paused. “But the fact is, you went and solved all those cases where professionals couldn’t, and I’m starting to think that we could stand to learn a few things.”

Twilight blushed. “I just happened to be there, that’s all.”

Then Twilight paused. “Wait. This pony you mentioned who complained about me…He wouldn’t happen to be…”

-

“YOU!” Officer Clue shouted, pointing a hoof at Twilight Sparkle, as she stepped out of the carriage after Officers Teeth Kicker and Tough. “Why are you here!?”

“Yup, thought so. Couldn’t be anypony else,” Twilight sighed, flexing her legs after the trip.

“She’s here as an expert witness in our investigation,” Officer Teeth Kicker said, firmly and gruffly. “And I expect you to play it civil with her.”

“Hmph. Civil indeed,” muttered Clue. “Well, as long as you don’t get in the way, I suppose I can tolerate you for the length of the investigation.”

Right back at you, Twilight thought.

“After all,” continued Officer Clue, “The Royal Guard thought I was the pony for the job, if I’m out here.”

“You were the ONLY pony for the job,” Officer Teeth shot back at Clue.

“Oh yeah, the letter did say you guys were understaffed…” Twilight muttered.

If Teeth Kicker heard what Twilight said, he didn’t show it. “Come on,” he said. “We’ve only got so much daylight today. Follow me.”

The village of Oatswich was certainly quite the spectacle. On each side of the street Twilight was standing in, she could see several houses, all very similar in size and colour, each facing its neighbour on the other side, like they were staring in a mirror. The group walked along the street, each one taking in the sights of the quaint little village.

Eventually, Teeth Kicker walked up to a house on the right of the street, close to the end, and knocked sharply on the door. It was answered by two ponies; one was a mare with a dirty brown coat and a black mane, the other was a stallion with a yellow coat and hair as black as the other.

“You Bottom Dollar and Dirt Cheap?” Teeth Kicker asked.

“Yes,” said the stallion. “Is there anything we can help you with?” He sounded rather quiet, almost as though he was tired, although he clearly looked wide awake.

“I’m here from the Ponyville Royal Guard. We have a warrant to investigate your house regarding allegations of a counterfeiting operation going on?” He held out a document which he retrieved from his pouch, and showed it to the pair.

“Counterfeiting?” replied the mare. “What, we don’t know anything about that, do we, Dollar?”

“Um, no,” said Bottom Dollar.

“So may we investigate?” asked Officer Tough.

“If ya want,” said Dirt Cheap. She sounded quite confident. “But I don’t think you’ll find anything here.”

The house that Twilight and the others were investigating certainly didn’t look like a hiding place to cover up a crook’s operations. It was for all intent and purposes a rather lovely looking country home. It was a stone house with ivy growing outside on the walls. Something else stuck to the walls was a small flight of six steps made from metal mesh on the side of the house that led from the ground floor to the upper storey. Just by the doorway, there was a large wooden waterwheel turning rather steadily anti-clockwise, relative to where Twilight was standing. There was something almost hypnotic about the way it turned, as well as the clunking sound it made as it moved.

“I’ll go in and give it a good once over,” Officer Teeth Kicker said to Twilight and Officer Tough. The two of them nodded, and Teeth Kicker disappeared inside.

“Um, will you be taking long?” asked Bottom Dollar. “I just don’t think you’ll uncover anything. We don’t know anything about a counterfeiting operation…”

“Relax, dude,” said Dirt Cheap. She flashed a cocky smile. “It’s probably a big mistake. They’ll let us go once they admit defeat.”

“You seem sure of yourself,” Twilight remarked.

“And why not?” asked Dirt Cheap. “We ain’t got nothing to hide, so we’ve got nothing to be frightened of.”

Just then, Teeth Kicker appeared from the front door again. “Just scanned for hazards. Seems to be clear, you can come in.”

“Alright!” said Officer Clue, swaggering towards the house. “There’s no time to lose. The crime scene awaits!”

“Not you, them,” said Teeth Kicker impatiently. “Twilight and Tough are coming with me. You stay with the other guards and make sure that those two don’t walk off anywhere.”

“WHAT!?” Clue shouted at the top of his voice. “That’s absurd! You’ll need my genius to investigate this place…”

“Can it,” Teeth Kicker warned. He gave an almost withering look towards Clue, who grudgingly said, “Fine, but I think you’re making a big mistake.”

“We’ll see,” Twilight said.

“Alright, see if I care! I’ll just wait for you to give up so I can point and laugh at you instead!”

“Sour grapes,” muttered Twilight, as they entered the house. The sight that greeted the three of them seemed quite ordinary at first glance. Twilight could see all around the room. On the other side of the room (the wall facing north) she could see that there were several small tables, each one with a small pot of geraniums. Each one had the same flowery pattern and white colour. The west wall had two black massage chairs next to one another, straight between a green cloth sofa and the wall next to it. Straight in the middle of the room was a round table, with three chairs surrounding it, dividing each section of the table into perfect thirds.

Twilight looked around. Teeth Kicker was right; there was certainly nothing that would suggest a counterfeit gem operation at first glance. Everything looked perfectly ordinary.

“Come on, I’ll show you upstairs,” Teeth Kicker said, motioning the two of them to follow as he went out onto the landing. He looked as though there was something very interesting he spotted at the top. Twilight wondered if Teeth Kicker noticed anything unusual on his first visit inside. The two complied, making their way up the six steps that led straight to the upper floor. Teeth Kicker pressed down on the handle, opening the door. And boy, did Twilight receive quite the shock.

“What the…?” Twilight gasped. This was certainly unlike anything she’d seen so far. The room she was now in looked exactly the same as the floor below. The wallpaper and the paintjob was the same. The furniture as well as the arrangement was also all too eerily similar. Even the lamps in the room were of the same make, and were positioned in exactly the same place on the small tables. In fact, the only real difference was the window on the eastern side of the room, and the white curtains that accompanied it. Twilight found it all hard to take in.

“I know,” Teeth Kicker said, recognising Twilight’s amazement. “It’s not just this particular house, either. All the locals who live here apparently have their houses arranged exactly this way. Part of some funny tradition that they have going on here.”

“Tradition?” Twilight asked.

“Yes, apparently the entire town moved all their things on wagons, all of them packed into little boxes stacked on top of one another. It was a sea of boxes all over the convoy. So to remember that journey, each resident has their house look like a box stacked on top of one another.”

“Incredible,” Twilight breathed. “Everything, the same.”

“Yup,” Officer Teeth Kicker said, smirking. “Blew my mind when I first came here, too. Heard all about it, but didn’t think it was actually true.”

“Wow!” Officer Tough’s voice came from the eastern side. He was staring straight outside the window. “The view here is incredible! Check this out!”

“Tough, come away from the window and concentrate,” barked Teeth Kicker. Officer Tough walked sadly away from the view and rejoined him. Twilight shook her head. The future of crime investigation in Equestria had never looked bleaker that what she saw during the last few weeks.

Teeth Kicker nodded, his face now looking a little more serious. “But let’s not waste any more time. We have to see whether if we were right, after all.”

-

“What’s taking them so long?” Dirt Cheap began to complain. She was feeling extremely restless.

“Probably wanting to give a thorough look?” Bottom Dollar ventured quietly. "But I think they should take as long as they need."

“Bah!” Officer Clue’s outburst was a very sharp contrast to Bottom Dollar’s reserved tone. “Those imbeciles would have their precious investigation done much more quickly if they brought ME along. Yet here I am, having to play babysitter to you two!”

“Babysitter?” Dirt Cheap sounded insulted. “Who do you think we are, chowderhead?”

“W…WHAT!?” Officer Clue sounded livid. “The Great Clue Lesdork is no chowderhead! I am a genius!”

The two of them exchanged all sorts of colourful insults, with Bottom Dollar looking rather disapprovingly at the two of them, apparently deciding not to get involved.

-

Teeth Kicker paused. The three of them were combing each piece of furniture in the room from top to bottom, with Teeth Kicker inspecting the plant pots, when the three of them heard a commotion coming from outside. Teeth Kicker instantly recognised the sound. “Oh Sweet Celestia,” he groaned, as he listened to the angry shouts from the window. “Clue got his buttons pressed again?” He got up, and headed towards the door.

“Um, Officer Teeth Kicker?” Twilight asked. “Where are you going?”

“Calm that idiot ‘genius’ and the two suspects down before they start a brawl,” he sighed. “Tough. Miss Sparkle. You poke around this place while I’m gone, alright?” And with that, he left the two of them alone in the strange room, rubbing his forehead.

“Well, I suppose it’s just us, then,” Twilight said, hoping to make a thorough job of it, despite being a pony down. “Let’s get on with it.”

But to be honest, Twilight really wasn’t sure WHERE to start to ‘get on with it’. She didn’t know enough about this place to begin to know where would be the most likely place to look. As far as she could see, there was certainly nowhere that immediately stuck out to her. Of course, she knew about the pitfalls regarding first impressions, but Twilight wasn’t in the mood to waste unnecessary energy. Of course, there was nothing else, so Twilight began to inspect all the pieces of furniture in the room, just like she did on the first floor.

Officer Tough clearly had some energy problems of his own. The heat of the day was starting to get to him, and so he made a beeline straight for the two massage chairs against the west wall. They seemed to be squeezed rather tightly between the sofa and the wall. As Tough sat down, he moved his hoof towards the button to get the chair to vibrate. Shortly after this, he found that due to the chair’s awkward positioning, he couldn’t reach it. He could however still see the button in between the folds. He began to shake the chair, hoping that it would come loose so that he could get to it, but the chair remained resolutely in place.

Of course, all the rattling that Officer Tough was making certainly didn’t get missed by Twilight. She lifted her head away from a lamp she was investigating.

“Officer Tough, I don’t think you should mess around with those…” Twilight said disapprovingly. “What am I going to tell Officer Teeth Kicker? Or your boss?” That got Officer Tough leaping out of the chair instantly. But even this hurried action did nothing to move the massage chair he was sitting in from where it was.

Tough sighed. “Sheesh, these chairs made it hard for me to reach the switch. They were so close together. What were these ponies thinking, squeezing them in a corner like this?”

Twilight looked around the room. “I don’t see anything that would suggest forgery here. Not in one glance, anyway. Come on, why don’t we try downstairs?”

-

Down on the lower level, Twilight began to pace around the room, looking for anything that might stick out. Officer Tough took the opportunity to make his way secretly towards the massage chairs he was so fond off. When he got to them, he began to gently stroke the arms of one of them. He paused. He gave the chair a little tug. The chair then moved slightly forward. Tough smiled. This chair was a sitting chair. No doubt about it. It had enough room for some real vibrations here.

“Tough? What are you doing?” Twilight’s voice. Officer Tough jumped, quickly shoving the chair back to its original place. Twilight saw him, which caused a raised eyebrow. “Nothing.”

“Technically, it’s impossible to do ‘nothing’,” Twilight noted rather drolly. “We’re both breathing, you and I for example.”

“…Find anything?” Tough said, deciding to change the subject.

“…nothing major. Not yet anyway,” Twilight said, continuing to stare at the chairs. She didn’t sound like she found nothing. “I need time to think. Didn’t you say that the view upstairs was really good?”

“Uh, I guess I did,” Tough admitted. “Why?”

“Just clearing my head.”

Back upstairs, Twilight told Tough to inspect the room from top to bottom for anything that would scream ‘forgery’ to him in one look. And to leave the massage chairs alone unless they were proven to have a connection, to Tough’s disappointment.

As Twilight stared out of the window, she found that Officer Tough was certainly right about the view. She could see a gently flowing stream flowing merrily straight into the house from the cleft. There were also several hills spread across the horizon, upon which Twilight could see much of Ponyville. Twilight felt that she could stare at the lovely view all day if she had to. It seemed to be so alien.

Twilight’s eyes suddenly widened. “Hang on. That can’t be right. Unless…”

With this sudden burst of inspiration, Twilight suddenly raced back downstairs and galloped straight towards the waterwheel. “Where ARE you going?” Tough protested, followed after Twilight. Being considerably fitter than the scholarly Twilight, he caught up to her in no time, just as she made the last few steps toward the waterwheel, staring intently at the floor. It was exactly as they left, still turning resolutely counter-clockwise, never changing in its pace.

Twilight then began to frantically dig at the dirt beside the waterwheel with her hooves. “Wh…Hey! What are you doing?” Officer Tough looked on in confusion, but even this protest didn’t stop Twilight from her feverish digging.

Eventually, she managed to unearth what appeared to be a purple glowing gem. It was about the size of her hoof, and was glowing rather eerily. Twilight carefully picked up the gem with magic. The moment it left the dirt, the waterwheel suddenly slowed before it completely stopped turning. Twilight recognised it immediately. She had seen it all too many times in her research. She even handled gems exactly like this one during her studies.

“The heck is that?” Officer Tough peered carefully at the glowing purple gem. “I’ve never seen this before. What the heck was it doing underneath the waterwheel? And why’d the wheel stop, anyway?”

Twilight didn’t hear him. She continued to stare at the gem, now suddenly linking all of the strange points to form one whole.

So that’s it, Twilight thought triumphantly. That explains EVERYTHING.

Officer Tough could see the grin on Twilight’s face slowly get bigger. “You okay? …Wait, don’t tell me you…”

“Get Officer Teeth Kicker. It’s urgent.” Twilight’s firmness certainly couldn’t get any clearer than that. Tough nodded, and left.

It didn’t take long to get him. However, the effort of today was taking its toll on the elderly grey stallion. He looked like he was about to fall over from exhaustion at any second. It seemed keeping the two ponies as well as Officer Clue under control was a tiring task indeed.

“I think I have it, Officer Teeth,” Twilight said proudly. “The proof you’re looking for.”

“No fooling?” That turned Teeth’s attention to Twilight quickly enough, and any tiredness was promptly forgotten. “What? What was it?”

The explanation was fairly quick (Officer Tough said there wasn’t too much time for one of Twilight’s ‘summations’) but Twilight made sure not to leave anything important out. When she had finished, Twilight was fairly restless, as was Officer Teeth Kicker. Finally, he said, “Tough, you go and take Twilight. You should know.”

Tough nodded. Twilight didn’t need to ask why. It was finally time to seal the nail in Bottom Dollar and Dirt Cheap’s coffin.

-

As it happened, the pair of suspects was being kept inside a long abandoned building just on the other side of the street. Officer Clue was still with them, with Clue’s sullen expression seemingly unchanged.

“Well, well, look who it is,” The Chief said, as Twilight and Officer Tough entered the door. “How are you getting on?”

“Um…” Bottom Dollar asked. “How long are we going to stay here? You’re not going to find anything. Because there isn’t anything to find.”

“Yeah,” added Dirt Cheap. She sounded as though she was trying to act tough. “If you can’t find what you were looking for in our place, then neither can we. We’ve got nothing to hide, like we told you!”

Twilight then cast a magic blade spell. Instantly, a long thin rod of pure magic extended from her horn. She pointed the sword at the couple, causing them to flinch.

“Oh, I wouldn’t say so,” Twilight said rather serenely. “It’s just that nopony would initially look in the right place first time round. But we did. It’s over.”

Officer Tough nodded. He felt that it would be all he’d be allowed to contribute, given that this was now Twilight’s show.

“It was quite the trick,” Twilight remarked calmly, as she kept her horn pointed towards the couple. “All those houses in the district are all the same shape and size, according to a tradition in this villiage, so I’m told. Heck, they even have the same furniture in the same place with the same amount of them on each of the two floors. Except for yours, apparently.

“I don’t know whether it’s unique to your house or not, but it has a false wall, doesn’t it? I did think it was weird that the massage chairs propped up against the west wall below wouldn’t budge from their spot no matter how much Officer Tough messed around on them, yet the massage chairs by the same wall on the ground floor were obviously looser. The reason for this is because the west wall on the first floor isn’t the same size as the ground floor west wall; it’s slightly wider, to accommodate a secret passage, leading to your lab. So of course, you’d have to be able to move the chairs out the way to get in.”

Bottom Dollar and Dirt Cheap seethed. “Yes, I know there’s a lab down there,” Twilight said, not keeping her horn or her eyes off the pair. “It’s the only explanation for that odd waterwheel by this house. I noticed it always turns counter clockwise; from right to left. Yet the stream just outside flows TOWARDS the house. So the waterwheel on the opposite side should have been turning in the other direction if it was truly connected to the stream. Clearly the stream wasn’t what was causing it to move. That’s why…” Twilight fished out the kinesis gem. It was still glowing resolute purple, as though it was glad to be out in the open for a change. “…I dug up the ground underneath, and found this thing. A kinesis gem, a special kind of gem that housed magic that leaked out to cause any object to start moving in one direction according to its shape. The wheel’s actually part of the equipment downstairs, isn’t it? A moving piece in your machine that creates fake gems?”

“So these guys really were creating fake pieces all along! Just as the Royal Guard thought!” Officer Tough declared.

Bottom Dollar chuckled, a rather cocky chuckle that completely went against his initial meek demeanor. “Amazing. You’re totally different from all those Canterlot dorks.”

“So it’s true,” Twilight said, satisfied.

“Right,” Dirt Cheap said, never losing that cocky look on her face. “It was perfect. We would go sell these counterfeits in secret from town to town, and we’d both be rolling in the money. Well, until you totally spoilt everything.

“But…” said Bottom Dollar, “we can always start again. Just you wait. Now…”

He then pulled a null-gem from his long mane, and tapped onto Twilight’s magic blade. It instantly dispelled the blade, causing it to evaporate. Twilight felt a sharp pain to her horn, causing her to screw her eyes shut for a second. When she opened them up again, she saw the pair run straight through an opening, with Clue rugby-diving towards them, trying and failing to grab hold. All this gave Bottom Dollar and Dirt Cheap just enough time to leap out of the window…

…and were promptly bucked straight into the wall by two powerful grey back legs.

Twilight breathed a sigh of relief. Trust Officer Teeth Kicker to pull through when it mattered.

“Twilight,” Teeth Kicker acknowledged, as Twilight teleported down with Officer Tough. “It was exactly as you thought. All sorts of uncharged rocks all over the place, as well as the standard equipment you’d expect to see. You were right; the water wheel was acting as the power generator for their big machine.”

“How…” groaned Dirt Cheap, trying to recover from the impact to the face. “How’d you get in?”

“Well, I’ll just say you folks are gonna need to pay for a new wall.” Teeth Kicker scraped his back legs rather proudly. “I’d normally foot the bill, but I don’t think I’ll need to this time round.”

“Got that right,” said Officer Tough. “Good job, Miss Sparkle. I think the folks back home will rest easy tonight.” And he whipped out two pairs of hoofcuffs, shackled the crime duo up, and led them to a Royal Guard carriage, together with Teeth Kicker.

-

Everything went as well as could be reasonably expected. Thanks to the senior guard bucking the doorway to the lab off, the Guards found it easy to obtain the evidence to put Bottom Dollar and Dirt Cheap away for good. And so the case closed the way everypony felt was best. All in all, Officer Teeth Kicker felt rather good.

He could have felt better of course, but he had something that needed dealing with. Quietly.

“I don’t BELIEVE IT!”

Teeth Kicker chugged down his Cola, desperate to nurse his readily growing headache.

“Miss Twilight Sparkle solved the mystery and got the proof needed to finally put the gem forgery case to bed. Before you. Again. Deal with it,” Teeth Kicker told Officer Clue.

“I could have solved it!” argued Clue. “You wouldn’t even let me look around the crime scene so…”

“I know. That was the point,” Officer Teeth got out of his chair, deciding to keep himself busy with paperwork instead. It wasn’t as though anypony on the Guard cared what Officer Clue thought anyway.

“HEY! I was talking to you, Gruff!” Clue shouted after him. Just then, he heard a stern voice coming from the room over. “Clue! My coffee’s going to get cold! Celestia forbid, do I have to dock your pay again?”

“Ack! Coming sir!” Clue hastily left the room before Teeth Kicker.

He raised an eyebrow. The Chief already had his coffee today, so…?

Then he smiled. Just another reason the boss was such an awesome guy to work for.

-

“Sounds like you had quite the ordeal,” Rarity said, as she handed Twilight her towel.

Twilight put it carefully outside the tub, as she made to relax in the hot water. “No kidding. Still, it shouldn’t be anything too regular; I told them that I didn’t want to work for them. Wouldn’t want to be kept away from here. I have all my friends, after all.”

Twilight closed her eyes in contentment. “And this spa’s just too good to miss.”

Twilight was quickly met by a stream of warm water being squirted at her in the face. Spluttering, Twilight saw that Rainbow Dash had a large water cannon in her hooves, and was draining the tub water for another shot.

“RAINBOW DASH!” Rarity shouted. “I am appalled, is that any way to behave at a relaxation spa?”

“Ah, lighten up,” Rainbow scoffed. “A pony’s entitled to have a blast, right?”

She then aimed her cannon towards Twilight. Prepared this time, Twilight’s horn glowed a light shade of purple, and she clicked the settings on it to ‘Reverse’. Rainbow was promptly met by water streaming into her face from the back of the cannon.

Twilight sank herself back into the warm water, leaving a shocked Rainbow to process what had just happened. “Magic. Best thing ever.”

-

“I see,” Princess Celestia said, as Officer Tough gave the report on what happened in Oatswich. “Thank you. That will be all.”

Tough nodded, and saw himself out of the throne room.

The white alicorn stared at the ceiling, smiling to herself. “You’ve come such a long way, Twilight, my faithful student,” she said quietly to herself. “Perhaps you could even finish that one mystery that has gone unsolved for hundreds of years…and if you do, then…”

Author's Note:

Good lord, with a bit of editing by an actual professional writer, I have enough cases to make an actual game!

It's as meaningless as it sounds, I'm sure.