Help
HELP
Everypony knew the tragic story of the Apple family, it had been the talk of all of Ponyville for the past two months. Several workers were gathering the last of the apples when a nearby dam broke and a flood tore through the lush green fields, washing away the lives of those workers. Sadly, two of those workers left behind three children, who were now to be raised by their distraught grandmother, Granny Smith.
The youngest of the three ponies was a little foal named Apple Bloom. Not even started in school, Apple Bloom really did not understand what had happened. Naturally, she was aware that her parents were missing, but came to accept Granny Smith as her primary care-giver relatively quickly.
The middle pony, a young orange filly with blonde hair, named Applejack, was still in school when her parents were taken by the flood. Still without her cutie mark, Applejack only understood one thing about her parents untimely death and that was the simple fact that they were gone. Yes, she had trouble accepting their death and, naturally, it was extremely upsetting, but the truth of the matter was very clear to Applejack and, somehow, understanding that truth comforted her. It was easier for her to return to daily life because of this.
Her older brother, on the other hoof, was not so understanding. His name was Big McIntosh, or 'Big Mac' for short and he did not have the same simplicity in life that his younger sisters had. For him, this turned his whole world upside-down. Big Mac already had his cutie mark and was already helping out around the farm outside of his school time. Even though he was ready to begin work full-time, Big Mac's parents had wanted him to stay in school and become 'proper learned' because it was never something that they had had the chance to do. However, when his parents and the other workers were taken by the flood, it only left Big Mac and his Granny to keep the farm going. As the ever-ageing Granny Smith had to devote most of her time to baby Apple Bloom, this really only left Big Mac on his own to work the fields. Big Mac had no choice but to abandon his education and the dreams his parents had for him.
Big Mac took all of this extremely hard and buried himself in his work, growing increasingly introverted each day. As the days grew longer with the coming of spring and the farm began to show signs of struggle, the fresh-faced mayor of Ponyville – Mayor Mare – decided that is was time for the ponies of Ponyville to give something back to the farm. Mayor Mare was kick-starting a recruitment drive for volunteers to work at Sweet Apple Acres!
So it began, at Ponyville town square, right in front of a the lavish town hall, a large off-white tent was placed. Ponies were required sign-up a week in advance and were given an interview time. Standing there, right at the back of the crowd, was a quivering, timid caramel-brown teenage colt. Looking out across the mass of ponies, he shifted his messy dark brown hair around his face as if he were trying to hide. This pony was not known for excelling in any kind of physical activity. In fact, quite often, he would muck up even the simplest of task that required him to do anything other than sit quietly. However, no-pony could disagree that, for all he messed up, this pony had luck on his side – literally! His cutie mark had taken on the shape of three sparkling blue horseshoes.
The natural luck also extended to his studies and, combined with his constant 'sitting-still-and-keeping-out-of-trouble-ness', this particular pony had found himself two years ahead of his other classmates. The young pony could never quite decide, though, if that was the work of good luck or bad luck, but it was luck all the same!
So, why on earth was he here, volunteering for something that required him to work physical labour on a farm?
“Next up is...” the mayor's assistant scanned the list of names. “Caramel?” he called out to the crowd. “Is there a 'Caramel' here today?”
There were numerous murmurs from the, now, relatively small crowd.
“Caramel?” one shrill voice piped up. “What on earth is that clumsy little foal here for?”
Glancing up, the caramel pony with the messy brown hair hadn't even noticed that the crowd of multi-coloured ponies had parted, giving him a clear view of the tent. All eyes were on him now.
“Uh... y-yes?” Caramel trotted forward nervously.
“Oh! It really is him?” an older pony exclaimed gruffly. “I thought that was some kind of joke!”
Caramel's head lowered, his brown hair falling across face. He could hear all the ponies laughing at him inside his head. Caramel knew that they would hang around to watch the spectacle of him getting rejected for farm-work by the mayor herself – just another muck-up, as usual. He was going to be the laughing stock of the whole town... again!
Caramel could feel the tears welling up and squeezed his eyes shut as tight as he could to stop them from falling. The last thing he needed was everypony knowing that he was a pathetic little crybaby too.
“What must his parents be thinking?” a socialite mare cried out. “Honestly!”
Thinking of his parents, Caramel knew that they would be supportive of him at least giving it the old college try. Even though he messed up (a lot) and had resorted to the quiet and safe life of a bookworm, Caramel's parents always told him to never stop trying. However, after so many years, it became harder for them to hide their disappointed in their only son.
“I'll bet his parents actually put him up to this.” another pony responded to the socialite. “They were farm ponies too, you know.”
Caramel thought that too himself, but only for a moment – was he being influenced by the life and mentalities of his parents? His father had been a strong and muscular stallion who grew up not that differently from the life Big Mac was now beginning to lead. Caramel had never known his grandparents and all his father knew was a life of work, actively shunning the books that Caramel loved so much. In fact, his father had probably been the first of the volunteers to sign-up for this.
There was no doubt about it, the life his father had led paralleling the beginning of Big Mac's new life was definitely influencing his decision, but not for the reasons that everypony was thinking...
“You're up, kiddo!”
Glancing up, Caramel had not even noticed that he had reached the front already. That mayor's assistant flash the caramel-coloured pony a smile and pulled back the doorway of the tent, allowing the little pony access.
With his knees clattering together, Caramel slowly walked into the off-white tent that had been set up to interview the potential volunteers. All around, Caramel could feel the other ponies watching him, questioning why a clumsy little pony like him would be volunteering for work on the farm. Shaking off the negative thoughts welling up inside, Caramel stepped into the tent and the door dropped back down behind him.
Inside was much smaller than he expected, with only two small stools on either side of a long table. A few piles of books were stacked around the tent, with titles such as 'What Makes a Good Worker Pony?' and the likes. Taking a seat on the nearest of the stools, Caramel could not help but notice a mini-mountain of crumpled paper on the floor around the other stool. Scanning across the table, Caramel also caught a glimpse of a long list of names labelled 'Volunteers' – were those all the ones who had already been accepted? Caramel wondered if he had to, or even would be able to, compete with all of these other ponies. Or would he just be another rejected crumpled bit of paper on the floor?
“Ahem!”
Snapping out of his thoughts, Caramel had not even noticed the other pony sitting across from him on the other stool. She looked cold, her fur a lesser saturated colour than his own. Caramel gulped as he examined her pristine silver hair and the tough glare in her sharp blue eyes. The young colt squeezed his blue eyes shut in disbelief – he could not believe that he had not noticed the mayor sitting across from him!
“So,” Mayor Mare said as she looked Caramel up and down, sizing his potential. “Impress me.”
Caramel's eyes shot open... and his jaw dropped. “I, uh, w-well, um, you see...” he lost it. “I-I, uh, well, I thought, well, what I mean is... I...”
Caramel just could not seem to get the words out, and he had so much he wanted to say too. He needed to pull it together and say what need said. For Big Mac...
“Come on, out with it.” the mayor tried to sound encouraging, but it came out snappy. “I haven't got all day and there are plenty of more ponies to see!”
The moment the words left her mouth, Mayor Mare caught herself and lowered her head. However, it was too late. Caramel just could not help but feel completed intimidated. It paralysed him. He lowered his head, becoming fixating on a blade of grass situated perfectly between the front legs of his stool.
Taking in a few deep breaths, the mayor leaned across the table. Caramel could feel her sharp eyes drawing nearer, targeted dead-set on his pathetic face. The young pony did not know what to do, but was prepared for immediate rejection.
“Stop.” the mayor said surprisingly softly.
Caramel lifted his head slowly, looking at her in disbelief – he certainly was not expecting a gentle let-down.
“I have seen dozens of ponies today proclaiming to be the best apple buckers in town and all of them, I must say, are certainly up to the task.” She paused. “By the looks of you,” she sized him up again, “you just don't seem to fit the bill.”
Caramel lowered his head once again, tears filling his soft blue eyes. He kept wondering what had possessed him to come to this stupid volunteer thing, but he could not help but think about...
“So, tell me,” the mayor continued, leaning back from the table, “why did you come here today?”
Taking in a deep breath and forcing back the build-up of tears, Caramel looked up at the mayor with a sense of purpose. He had come here for a reason and he simply had to try.
“School.” Caramel blurted out.
Silence.
The mayor gazed at him, squinting her eyes as she tried to figure out what the young pony meant.
Caramel could not help it. One word and he froze. It was all he could think about - school. Last year at school, Caramel had skipped ahead one year and wound up in the same class as Big Mac. This year, Caramel found that he was to advance another year. Then, after what happened at the Apple farm... all Caramel could think about was how Big Mac was not going to finish school. More importantly, in Caramel's mind, was how Caramel was not going to get the chance to see Big Mac everyday. He needed a legitimate reason to visit the farm and this volunteering opportunity gave him just that. As he was not the physical labor type, Caramel devised a plan where he could spend time with Big Mac by helping him to study and finish school in his free time.
Now all Caramel had to do was put that across to the Mayor in such a way that avoided the whole "schoolboy crush" thing.
“You are going to need to give me a bit more than that,” Mayor Mare sighed.
“Oh!” Caramel's eyes opened wide. “Right, um, o-okay...” He started to compose himself and explained, “well, um, you see, l-last year I was, erm, I was... I was in the same class as Big Mac.” Suddenly he stopped. “Oh! Sorry! I-I mean... Big McIntosh!” Caramel looked at the mayor sheepishly, who motioned him to continue. “Well, I thought that it was really unfair tha-that Mac had to leave sc-school and I thought that I could help him catch up on, um, you know, education in m-my own time so that he could be g-good and smart like everypony else.” Finally Caramel stopped. He took in several deep breaths and focused on his fast-paced heart beats.
“I see,” the mayor looked down the list of volunteers.
Mayor Mare moved the list to the side and picked out a new sheet of blank paper. Caramel thought for sure that she was going to write his name on it, crumple it up, throw it on the floor and yell at him for being so foolish - “we're looking for apple buckers, not bookworms!” he could hear her shouting in his head.
“Okay.” Mayor Mare smiled at him. “In your own time, you can help, so long as it doesn't affect your own studies.”
Caramel could not believe it – she agreed!
“And his chores.” the mayor quickly added.
Chores? Still, it was a lot better than being a crumpled piece of paper.
“Thank you!” Caramel grinned as he was dismissed.
Heading out of the tent, Caramel found himself filled with new-found confidence. Sure, it was going to be a lot of hard work, for both him and Big Mac, but it was definitely going to be worth it.
Caramel had luck on his side once again. He was actually going to get to spend as much time as he wanted to with Big McIntosh! Caramel stopped in the middle of the crowded market street he had aimlessly wandered into. Everypony around was casting him strange looks because of the giant grin on his blushing face. Caramel, however, could not care less as he had just gotten permission, from the mayor of all people, as well as a legitimate reason, to spend as much time as he wanted with the one pony in all of Ponyville who he had the absolute biggest crush ever on – Big McIntosh!
Stats
Page generated in 0.021 seconds
Total duration
998 users online
1,654,522 hits today, 2,280,440 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
I'm pretty sure it's Big Macintosh.
Like the Macintosh apple.
2584433
Actually, the name of the apple is McIntosh
There's a bit of difficulty with this because there's discontinuity within the actual show itself as to how the name is spelled and, after looking into all of it (ie, reading this: http://mlp.wikia.com/wiki/Big_McIntosh#Development.2C_design.2C_name) I opted to go with how Lauren Faust herself spelled the name.
This happened to a friend of mine at school, his second name being McDermott, but people interchangeably spoke and spelled it as MacDermott even though he was adamant that it should lack the extra 'a'. Oddly enough, as a nickname, he was always referred to as Mac D, with the 'a'. So, I figured that Big McIntosh's name is probably a similar situation.
Thanks for the comment all the same - it's great to see a reader pick up on details like that
Hm. So far, I quite like this. However, I think you'd get a lot more likes if you were to join this and this and put it in one of their folders. Please continue!
2585846
any advice on how to improve?
Thanks very much - I'm glad that you're liking it so far
This is the first fic I've written for a while and my first venture into pony fic
Also, thanks for the suggestion of the groups - I've joined both and submitted 'Learn Me to Read' to both of them - it is very much appreciated
2585874 Well, I was thinking that maybe you could have added a little more build-up to the end of the first chapter, as before that you've only got the mention that Caramel wants to help Mac finish school, and all of a sudden we learn he has a crush on him. You could do with adding, say, a few of Caramel's thoughts in, like after he explains why he wants to help, something like:
Y'know, just give a few hints as to Caramel's feelings throughout the chapter. It makes it a little more even and justifies the ending better.
I love the story so far keep up the awesome work
2586269
Thanks very much for the advice
I'll have another read through of it tonight or tomorrow and see if there is any where I can slot in a few 'hints' 
Also, thanks CosmicThunder for your comment too - it is very much appreciated
Ok first off let me just say this I want more!!! And second Macintosh is how it is spell in the English interpretation McIntosh is more of a Scottish derived spelling of the name so it depends on the writer how they spell his name but I always spell it as Macintosh. Third I loved it I want to see more of it and so help me god if you do not continue this I will harass you until you do I don't get to read many caramac fics!!
I like how you start to story, very interesting how you slowly weave together the story of the death of the parents, giving an explanation why
is so forthwith and why our Stallion is so introverted, in a sense. (as the only person he really talks openly to, as we've seen is 
)
Caramel seems timid, or generally scared shitless, which would probably leaved his surprised (hence the grin) at receiving permission to work alongside
. It's a good enough reason as any. I see you also took some of this "giving back" malarkey from episodes where 
hasn't taken help or asked when needed and songs like Raise this Barn where there has been a strong sense of community.
It does seem a bit short, and it did leave me wanting more. Perhaps this is an adequate chapter length for something like this, as it's written well and includes "pony-isms" and you can see where the stages are at through this. I feel that it's a nice end to the chapter.
Anyway lovely all round, me wants mooooooooooooooooore :)
2588887
Well I am actually Scottish and that brand of apples are McIntosh - didn't know it was different in England - yay, I learned something
Don't worry - I definitely will be continuing with this
Also, thanks SirMagicHooves for your comment (and now that you've finally joined I can credit you for proof-reading it and weeding out some silly spelling mistakes) - not sure if I told you this, but this was actually intended to be a one-shot but after writing what became this chapter, I felt it would be too long a one-shot and would be better divided.
On that note, Chapter 02 will be coming very soon
2596008 Please please please hurry with the next chapter!!! I need my caramac fix badly!!!!! Also that's nice well I'm not in England I'm in America but my relatives and all are from Poland my ma's maiden name is klisciewcz I know it's a weird spelling but it is definitely polish. I'm part polish and I own a farm also. The polish language ended with my grandfather because my ma didn't bother to learn some of it while he was alive. But yeah do you live on a farm or something cause if not i would love to teach you some things about a farm in order to boost your stories content about the certain jobs on the farm. Just message me if you wan to get to know me.
I smell one hell of a story a brewin with this one.