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Blending In1,100 words
The Pink Nightmare1,570 words
The Book That Holds... Something?1,437 words
Temple of Doom1,345 words
Dirty Dogs1,275 words
JOIN US!2,690 words
Sick as a Dog1,742 words
I AM INVADER, HEAR ME SCREAM!2,588 words

JOIN US!

Today, Zim was on another one of his field studies. He was dressed up in his poorly made disguise and walks through the park to view how the ponies go through their life. Right now he was focused on a pony playing a large wooden instrument. She's a grey earth pony that has a dark grey mane and a pink bow tie on. The music she was making was beautiful, but Zim didn't pay attention to that. Zim was more focused on the stick she was holding while she was using it to rub strings on the wooden instrument.

"How in the Andromeda galaxy can she hold that thing?" Zim pondered.

Zim lost his train of thought when he heard two ponies arguing. He looked over to the two and they were young colts. One of them was a tall and skinny unicorn, with dark yellow-gold fur and turquoise mane. The other was a short and stubby unicorn, with greyish blue fur and orange-brown mane. It seemed pretty intense, so Zim decided to get closer to hear their fighting.

"Theirs no way a pony could leave town without somepony knowing" the skinny one said.

The chubby preached out "That's because he didn't leave, he blew up."

"BLEW UP?" Zim's contact pupils dilated "This seems interesting. Go on, oh bucked tooth fool."

"Blew up? Nopony can just 'blow up'."

"I can think of one."

"It's true, he exploded because he got cooties." Zim got closer and listened more intensely at the unicorn's info "It's a terrible disease that gives ponies weak legs. Then, they start sweating as they get warmer and warmer and warmer until BOOM, the heat blows them up."

This seems promising to Zim. A sickness that weakened his enemies and also doomed them, Zim smiled at the thought.

The gullible skinny colt began to buy the story "So he got the cooties and blew up!? Where did he get it from, the Everfree Forest?"

"No, he got it from here!" Zim mystified the thought "He got it from touching a girl."

"Wha- you mean theirs a girl here, in town, that has cooties?"

"Not one, EVERY GIRL HAS THEM!!!" Zim was now starting to worry "All they have to do is touch you and you'll get the cooties!!!"

Zim returned, back into his thoughts, and began to feel frightened. "E-every girl..." Zim was shifting his eyes all over the park. He noticed there were some fillies playing ball, he glanced at two mares gossiping, he stared at a mare laying its back bone on a bench. "Th-they're everywhere, those horrible disease caring mares are everywhere." Zim's legs started to shake, he even started to sweat "I'm outnumbered, I-I got to think of something, gotta get outta here before..."

"Excuse me."

Zim's head whipped around to see a young filly. She had an orange color mane that alternated streams of a tinted version and a shaded version. She had a creamy bright yellow fur and was wearing a small green sash with various patches around her waist and a green cap that seemed to fit the role of an officer or someone of command. She looks at Zim while extending a red box with a hole on top and a red heart on a small pole.

"Would you like to donate?"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Zim ran screaming through the park, getting everypony's attention as he flails about.

About fifteen minutes later, the green 'pony' tired himself out. He is now leaning against a fancy looking building, regaining his composure. "To think, that these ponies have the ability to poison not only their enemies, but each other."

While Zim recharges, the door to the building he was laying against opens and three perfect specimens of cootie holders, ran outside. One of them notices Zim and stops the other two for a talk.

"There must be someway I can bypass this sickness" Zim thought to himself, but before he could think up a solution, a southern accent pony made herself known.

"Hi!" Zim turns to face three fillies staring at him. One was a orange pegasus, another was a white unicorn, and the last one that spoke up was a yellow earth pony. Despite the fact that they were 'hazardous', Zim was still recovering, so he stood on guard from any physical contact. "I haven't seen you at school before. Did ya just move here?"

It should be noted here on the height, Zim has. He's a small guy, even by the standards of his race, but he fits in pretty well when you put him on a planet full of ponies. He's about the same height of a fully grown pony... when he's standing. However, since he has to bend down to get on all fours, he's about the height of a young colt, or in this case, a little filly.

"er... no... I'm just... home schooled" Zim lied.

"You live at a school?" the earth pony questioned.

"No, no, he means that he is taught at home" the unicorn informed.

"SO THERE IS SUCH A THING!" the pegasus yelled, she looks at Zim "I bet you're an expert at 'The Legend of Luna!'"

The alien boy felt himself energized once more after his rest and decided it's time to ditch these girls "I should probably get going now."

"Wait!" the southern one said. She clears her throat and takes a pose "We are the Cutie Mark Crusaders and we were wondering" she looks over Zim's clothed body before returning to his face "do you have a cutie mark?"

"Crusaders" Zim panicked. "Forces that get rid of ponies infected by cooties?" he guessed "and they want to know if I have any!" Now Zim has trained for situations like this, when he gets under pressure in front of an enemy. He recalls his training to perform a calm, easy, understanding tone to avoid any problems.

"NOPE!NOCUTIES.I'MCLEAN,PERFECTLYCLEAN.NOMARKSOFANYCUTIESHERE.NOTHING!"

The girls start to light up, "Really, do you wanna join us?"

Seeing that his training paid off, Zim pursued the topic with confidence "Join... you?"

"Yeah, we can help each other at getting our cutie marks."

Obviously, this left Zim baffled "Why would you want to obtain, cooties?"

"Why? So we can find out our special talent, that's why."

The the white unicorn followed up "Yeah, haven't you ever wanted to get a cool looking cutie mark on your flank?"

"Like getting one for skate boarding" the orange one replied.

"Or one for drawing" said the leader.

"Maybe one for writing stories!" the unicorn spoke up again.

While they were going through the list of possible choices, Zim started to make sense at what they were talking about. He looked back and forth between the flanks of the adults and the three girls before him. "I see, these girls wish to reach puberty by receiving an emblem. They will only get in my way of concurring Equestria, thanks but I'll have to pass."

The girls broke the conversation they were having "What? But, don't you want to get a cutie mark?"

"I do not worry over such silly things" the Irken walked away "I, ZIM, have better things to do."

The three girls sat in front of the Carousel Boutique, disappointed at Zim's choice. "Silly, getting a cutie mark is silly?"

"No way," one of them said "getting a cutie mark is anything, but, silly. He probably doesn't know how important they really are, possibly from all of that home schooling."

"Playing too much 'Super Flimflam Bros.' can do that."

"Hey! Why don't we show him how important they are." The other two gave a bizarre look at her "Think about it, if we tell him on how important it is to get a cutie mark, then we could possibly get a new member and quite possibly get our cutie marks in the processes."

"How can we get cutie marks from this?"

"We can be Cutie Mark Recruiters! We could be good at getting ponies interested in stuff!"

The other two gave some thought at the idea "Yeah... YEAH! We could get a lot of others interested in a variety of things!"

"Like getting others interested into the 'Running of the Leaves'!"

"Or interested into making a float for the 'Summer Harvest Parade'!"

"Or even interested in that one show about the boy with that white hat!"

"We have to be REALLY good to get anypony interested in that pile of manure!"

"CUTIE MARK CRUSADER RECRUITERS!"

Somewhere within the calm streets of Ponyville, Zim has encountered another problem. He's hiding behind a barrel and is looking at the most horrifying looking creature he's ever seen. The creature itself is also staring back at Zim with vicious eyes that were envisioning the ways on how to mutilate its victim.

Sheer madness.

The girls caught up to Zim and they viewed at what he was looking at. He was glaring at a dog as if his life depend on it. The three fillies imitated the same pose Zim was making and got beside him to stare at the canine. "You planning to get a cutie mark in dog catching?"

"No" he replied, still staring at the dog.

"Oh..."

The starring continued.

"Are you trying to get a cutie mark at being a dog expert?"

"No."

"Okay..."

The horrifying battle of stares went on.

"Is this because you might be a dog pony?"

Zim stepped back and looked at the girls "What's a dog pony?"

The white unicorn spoke up "You know, do you like dogs or do you like cats" she pulls out a furry creature that has a bored expression and a purple bow tied up on its head.

Zim is taken back by this new creature and fears on what it might do. He looks at the unicorn who seems to be giving a signal towards Zim at taking the fur ball. As Zim stretches out his arm towards it, the cat starts hissing and jumps out of the pony's arms and onto Zim's face. It then starts scratching Zim as he screams and runs around in agonizing pain, trying to get the little devil off.

The girls began their attempts of getting the ferocious feline off him, but after a while the cat jumped down and scurried away by its own accord.

Zim peered at the fleeing cat through his 'hooves' "I'LL SHOW YOU TO A HUNGRY MELMACIAN, YOU LITTLE VERMIN!" He then turns his gaze at the ponies "WHY ARE YOU FOLLOWING ME?"

"We're here to show you how great it is at having a Cutie Mark!" the yellow earth pony proclaimed proudly.

Zim gritted his teeth, saying "I told you, I DON'T WANT ONE!" Suddenly, he was scooped up onto a chair by the white unicorn.

The orange pegasus was standing in front of Zim, holding a pointer in her mouth and tapped the end of it on a board stand with symbols and ponies on it.

"That's where your wrong" the yellow one continued while walking up to the board "getting a Cutie Mark can help show you what your talent is."

"I ALREADY KNOW WHAT MY TALENT IS!" Zim yelled.

"Yo... you do? What is it?"

"It's... Wait, I can't tell them I'm an invader." The fillies were leaning in closer for a response "It's... it's none of your business."

"Oh please" the orange one mocked "your not fooling anypony."

"It doesn't matter" he jumps of the chair "I don't want a Cutie Mark and, nothing, you say or do can change my mind."

Zim walks away, but the white unicorn got in front of him. "Please... won't you join up with us" she was getting close to Zim, giving off the best puppy eyes she could muster.

These 'pleading eyes' could give anyone with a consciences a hard time at fighting against, but this expression was... well... alien to him. So alien in fact, it didn't even phase him. Her eyes were no big deal, her proximity on the other hand...

"She's so close" Zim panicked "any closer and I might get cooties from her." Zim began to walk the other way until...

"Please?" the other two were giving the same expression and getting closer.

"Their ganging up on me. I... I HAVE TO GET OUTTA HERE!" Zim bolted out of their circle "GET AWAY FROM ME, YOU SMELL LIKE GLUE!"

The girls wouldn't take no for an answer and chased after him. "COME ON, YOU'LL LIKE BEING A CRUSADER! YOU GET A COOL CAPE AND A AWESOME NICKNAME! WE COULD CALL YOU GRASSHOPPER; THAT SOUNDS LIKE A COOL NICKNAME, RIGHT APPLE CORE? SURE DOES CHICKEN WING!" they were yelling out at Zim.

Zim ran for his life through ally ways in search of his base. "Where is it? Where is it? All of these buildings look the same!" he was thinking before ultimately blocked by a dead end. He looked back to see the girls slowly walking up to him, still pleading for his acceptance. As Zim saw his life slowly coming to an end... his legs started to weaken. It gave way before he began sweating bullets. With each step they took, Zim was getting warmer and warmer and warmer! "I can feel it! I can feel them using their cootie sickness to make me explode!" Zim's mind was in such a fury, that he couldn't think of a way out of this. Except for one.

"ALRIGHT!" Zim yelled, halting the crusaders "I'll join"

"You, you mean it?" Zim nodded. "YAY!" The girls yelled before looking at their flanks to see nothing there. They looked down in disappointment before returning their attention to Zim "Alright, meet us at Town Hall tomorrow morning and well take you to the club house, ah..." the yellow one that was speaking stopped and stared into space before continuing "say, what's you name?"

"Zim, my names Zim" he replied, to irritated at his submission to proclaim his name proudly.

"I'm Scootaloo" said the orange pegasus.

"I'm Sweetie Belle" said the white unicorn.

"And I'm Apple Bloom" said the yellow earth pony "meet up with us tomorrow Zim and we'll make you a crusader" she said before the rest of the fillies galloped about their previous business.

"I must find a cure for this disease" Zim uttered under his breath.

The next day, after the pledge~

Zim's first day as a crusader was a Cutie Mark Crusader Alien Hunters.

Author's Note:

Pinkie Pie image by MoongazePonies.