TSombra's Midnight Star

• MLP: FiM
• Romance
• Dark
• Mystery

For three thousand years he waited, mourning the loss of his mate. But now he found her but she doesn't remember what they had. Luckily Sombra has a spell to fix it.

• Violence
• Gore
• Death
• Profanity
• Alt. Universe
• Twilight
• OC
• Main 6
• King Sombra

Twilighted Rose · 146k words  ·  170  18 · 6.6k views

Review: Sombra’s Midnight Star

Tags: [Gore] 40%, [Violence]70%, [Death] 70%, [Profanity] 60%, [Romance] 100%, [dark] 100%, [Mystery] 60%, [Alternate Universe]

Summary: High rich story about the effects of Twilight finding live and dead ponies through a dark mystery course for the future.

Critic: Oh ok. So, this is really good. Not going to say what's wrong with it yet till it’s complete. Due to the fact it’s too good and it has that great dark feeling with a pinch of twists and turns.  That has done super well and this person has put in a lot of effort, put in a lot of time, and the pacing is far greater than I expected it to be. I respect that the person who made this was very interesting until the end of the chapter… which there will be more.  There is lots of stuff that I'm thinking of.  However, it is incomplete and I will treat it as incomplete which means it’s not done yet.

The flow so far is clearly at least an 8/10.

The structure of the building of the fiction is fascinating but it’s still a pinch of flaws which gives it an 8/10.

The word choices is great I give it at least an 9/10

Then there is grammar… I give it at least a 8/10

Final score is at least 8.5/10.

Thank you! I really appreciate your review! This encouraged me! If there’s anything that I need to work on I will love the feedback!