I am Wiccan and Gnostic?

Wiccans are cool.

5865354

I'm wiccan.

Remember only evil witches are ugly, and melt when they get wet.

5865999 If I become an evil witch, will I melt when I take a shower?

5866033

Yes, that's why the evil witch in 'wizard of oz' was green.

Sorry, couldn't resist the bad joke.

5866452 So, how does one become an evil witch? Showers are overrated, anyway.

5866939
It goes a little something like this:

[youtube=sZpa2lgWWCU]

--arcum42

5867018 That told being an evil witch is awesome but nothing about how to actually become one.

5867022 I don't know the whole process but at the end (or start) you have to stick the middle three fingers of your right hand in your mouth.

5866939

The process is kept very quite. All I know is it involves enslaving others to your will and torturing small animals.

5867079 And sticking your middle three fingers in your mouth.

5867076 Okay, now what?

5867079 Um, could you, perhaps, wear this collar for me. Got any pets?

5867422

Sorry, no happening

5867529 But how am I to become an evil witch then?

5867537

Find somepony else to enslave?

5867872 But you know how to properly do it. You could teach me to be an evil witch.

5868000

Hmmm...what's in it for me?

5868271 Uh, um... I thought being my slave would be reward enough. Okay, let's see here... Um, you would no longer have to care for your pet. How does that sound?

5868700

My wife would not be very happy if something happened to the pets, so I'm afraid I'm going to have to refuse.

5868792 You're no fun, and neither is your wife.

5869068

we're just a different kind of fun. After all we're good witches.

5869071 Are you able to shower, or do you melt if you adhere to hygiene?

5869090

as good witches were are able to remain clean,and even make sure our little witch remains clean

5869102 How do you do that? Do you shower with gasoline?

5869108

Nope, we're good witches we can use regular water.

5869153 Wow, that's so awesome.

If you, the good witch, would go against a bad witch, who'd win?

5869187

Me, I just grab my daughter's super soaker along with my favorite sword.

5869343 Wait... You're a witch, but you don't have any powers?

5869358

My sword is my focus, I chanel my spells through it. Much more effective if I run low on mana then a wand.

5869398 What kind of spells are we talking about? Can you summon demons to do your bidding?

5869412

Strictly speaking good witches don't usually summon demons, but I can given time to do the proper ritual. I know mostly combat spells that enhance my sword, don’t blame me blame my teacher. I can enact a lightning effect that will make it so my opponent receives a significant shock when I hit tgem, even if I hit them with the flat of my blade. Mostly though I just enchant the sword to not break and go medieval on those I'm against. I find its effective, especially is I cast a dampening spell on myself making other people's magic nearly useless against me. After the battle I drink rum out of my opponents skull, it's traditional.

5869874 Are there any visual effects to any of the spells you can cast or are they all just in your head?

5870246

Depends on the amount of prep time I have. Like Trixie I can put on a show without necessarily using magic.

5870330 Are you sure it's magic you're using and not just your confirmational bias?

5870774

I'll plead the fifth on that.

5871063 Would you consider yourself to be a person who is honest with oneself and isn't prone to succumb to self-delusions?

5871178

Absolutely...not.

5871690 Would you like to be?

5872058

Nope. Reality is overrated.

5872315 If you had to choose between two doors:
Door A leads you to a dreamland of fantasy
Door B leads you to the truth of the world
Which door would you choose?

5872336

Door A. Sounds like my kind of place.

5872589 Don't you care what the actual truth to reality is? Doesn't living a lie concern you in the slightest?

5872592

I embrace the Matrix.

5872600 We are worlds apart, you and I. Compared to you, I am an evil witch.

5872621

Oh well, that’s the way things go. I never claimed to be an evil witch.

5873154 If you were an evil witch, I'd be a white witch.

5873166

Lol. I'm a red witch, neither good nor evil technically.

5873200 I'm not sure what that makes me then.

5873207

Whatever you want it to make you

5873307 You know what? I don't think I even am a witch of any kind.